by J. L. Beck
I reach, wanting to feel his skin against mine, even for a fraction of a second. As if he can read my mind, he cups the side of my cheek and kisses me with so much passion. I can feel every word he never said to me in that single moment.
“Take care of her, Jared,” Enzo says, pulling away. Giving me a once over before he gives Jared the signal to take me away. I continue to thrash back and forth, screaming.
My heart aches, and as I watch the last of his body move from my sight, I feel my heart breaking into a million pieces.
“Jared, you can’t let him do this,” I plead.
“I have to, Amara. I promised him.”
“Please, Jared. Please.”
“It’s done,” he says, his tone hard.
He shoves me into the SUV’s back seat just as the first car comes into view, and lights and sirens fill the area.
Holding me tightly against his chest, so I can’t move, James pulls the car away from the building.
I cry as the man I love is left behind. Tears stream down my cheeks like an endless river. Nothing will end the pain. My chest is sliced wide open and my heart is barely beating. My throat constricts as I try my hardest to take a breath, but nothing is coming. No air enters my lungs, and I feel it. Deep down inside of me, I know I just lost my very reason to breathe.
43
Enzo
All I can see every time I close my eyes is her beautiful face etched in anguish. I knew her heart was breaking. What’s worse—it’s my fault.
“Mr. King.” I’m greeted by Agent Millerson–the balding FBI agent who threw me to the ground and put cuffs on me. Instead of returning the greeting, I simply stare at him. I’m not stupid. Just because I gave myself up to these people, doesn’t mean I’m going to open my mouth and tell them everything.
It’s only been five days, but I’m struggling, wondering if I’m ever going to get out of here.
You did this for her… I have to remind myself of that every hour of the day.
“One way or another, you’re going to have to talk,” he reminds me, yet again. This is the fifth day of interrogations, and let me tell you, they aren’t above physical abuse—but of course, neither am I.
“Talking would mean I have something to say… and we both know I have nothing to talk about.”
Instead of turning away as most grown men would when faced with my glare, he just stares back at me with a glint of amusement in his eyes. I must be losing my touch.
“You want out of here, and that’s only possible by talking.”
He’s lying. They will never let me go. They’ve tried to get to me for years. I did some really bad shit before meeting Amara. They might not have any proof of those, but they know I’ve committed the crimes.
“I’m not a rat, and even if I was, I wouldn’t have shit to say.” I chose my words carefully.
“Mack…” Agent Millerson says, the name rolling off his tongue as if he’s uttered the single word a million times.
“What about him?” I ask, voiding my face of all emotion.
“Don’t you find it slightly strange the man was found dead in your presence? You knew he was going to come to us and bring you in—but suddenly, he’s dead?”
Eli offered to take the fall for me, but I couldn’t let him do it. I have to face this on my own. Plus, we all knew they would do whatever they could to pin it on me—anything to keep me in this hell hole.
“I think Mack had death coming long before he started with me.” Which was the truth. Mack was bad before he met up with me, and I brought him to the group.
Agent Millerson scratches at his chin. His dark eyes hiding whatever it is he’s pondering.
“Let’s cut to the chase. You and I both know we have enough to pin the murder on you.”
“Then go ahead and do it. If you are that sure a jury will convict without a confession, then what are we still doing here?” I counter, leaning back into the metal folding chair casually.
Millerson mimics my movement, leaning back in his own chair. His lips tuck up into a smile, and he folds his hands behind his head.
“I think that’s enough.” He chuckles, confusing the hell out of me. “I have to give it to you, you are stubborn, but also loyal. How would you like to go home today?
My confusion grows, but I keep my face stoic, not giving anything away. “Yeah, I’m sure you’ll let me walk right out of this door. Maybe fix me a sandwich for the road?”
“I don’t know about the sandwich, but I’m not joking about the walking out of here part. You’re free to go. As a matter of fact, your ride just got here.”
Before I have the chance to respond, the door opens. On the other side, Eli’s large body comes into view. He walks in casually with the smuggest look on his face. What the fuck? I told him not to take the fall for me.
“Mr. King, you ordered an Uber?” Eli grins.
At this point, I am too shocked to hide it. I’m pretty sure my mouth is hanging open and my eyes are wide as fuck. Eli tips his head back and laughs.
“Someone tell me what the fuck is going on here. Is this a joke to you?”
“Not at all, but your face is priceless.” Eli chuckles.
“Eli has been working for us for a long time,” Agent Millerson explains. I see red, red hot rage. He fucking betrayed me. This whole time...
“What? You’re a mole for the feds?” I growl at him, fisting my hands, and feel the need to rip his head off.
“Not quite. At least not in the way you’re thinking right now. I am on your side, Enzo, always have been.” He walks over to the table and takes the seat Millerson just vacated across from me, and Millerson stands off to the side. It takes a lot of control not to wrap my hands around his throat.
“Explain,” I order, my patience running thin.
“We know you’ve done some bad shit, we have the knowledge, and the proof… lots of proof. We could easily put you away for the rest of your life. Thing is, there are people who commit far worse crimes than what you’re known for. Those are the people we’re really after.”
“I don’t have any info for you.” I shake my head. I won’t talk, even if it’s about other families.
“You don’t have to talk. You don’t have to do anything, really. Just keep doing what you’re doing,” Eli tells me like it’s the obvious answer.
“So, you want me to walk out of here and just keep doing what I’ve been doing?” Do these assholes think I’m an idiot?
“For now, yeah. Let me ask you a question. Do you know why Luccio really wanted you out of the picture?” I stare at Eli, not answering his stupid question. When I don’t say anything, he continues.
“Human trafficking, specifically underage girls, as young as eight… eight years old.” He emphasizes the last few words. My stomach churns, bile rises in my throat, and rage burns through my veins. Children, fucking children?
“He wanted you out of the way because he knew you wouldn’t allow it. Let me ask you another question. If we put you in jail for the rest of your life, what would happen with your territory? What is happening to Luccio’s territory now that he is dead?”
“Someone else will take over,” the answer falls from my lips without thought. It’s the first question I’ve actually answered since I got here. Eli grins smugly, probably realizing the same thing.
“There is no way to eradicate crime… the FBI and every other agency has tried that and failed miserably,” Millerson says, and an image of my mother flashes before my eyes. “We’ve come to accept it’s better to keep certain people in the game and take others out. Damage control rather than trying to snuff criminals out.”
I nod, understanding what he’s saying. I know what they’re talking about. Luccio’s family always had their fingers into some fucked up shit, but this… this is news to me.
“So what were the last five days for? We couldn’t have done this shit the first day you took me in?”
“It was a test. We needed to be one hundred percent sure
we can trust you. That you are loyal and wouldn’t throw Eli or even Amara under the bus for your freedom.” I shoot Millerson a glare at his use of her name.
“Yeah, we know she killed Mack,” he explains. “But again, we don’t care about that. Hell, we should give her a medal for ridding the earth of that scum.”
My mind is buzzing with all this information, and I can’t help but run every interaction I’ve had with Eli over the last few years through my head. I can’t wrap my mind around him working with the feds yet, but my anger about that somehow dissipates fairly quickly.
Maybe it’s the idea of being able to go back home to Amara, or the fact that he kept her safe more than once.
“So, what now?”
“We’ll have to keep you with us for a few more days, but you don’t have to stay in a cell. No more interrogations,” Eli explains. “I’m going to take you to a safe house, and we’ll spend some time there, filling you in on everything you don’t know. We’ll go over details on how we’ll proceed. We are taking extreme measures to secure this operation and make sure it will remain off the radar, for our and your safety.”
“Amara?”
“She is with Jared and James. She is fine, but you can’t contact her, yet. We need to make sure everything is set before you can return.” Eli gives me a sad smile, knowing exactly how hard it is for me not to talk to her.
“Fine,” I agree, feeling like a huge weight has been lifted off my chest. I can’t believe I just told the feds I’ll work with them. The same organization I’ve hated for so long, but knowing that is how I’ll see Amara again makes it an easy choice.
I’ll do whatever it takes to be with her… to make her happy.
Whatever it takes...
44
Amara
I’m over caring, over trying and taking care of myself. Losing him is all that consumes me. It’s hard to think about anything else when the other piece of my beating heart is out there somewhere. Jared is trying to make me feel better, as is our father.
They don’t understand. They don’t feel the pain deep down to their epicenter. Our love was built on fire, passion, betrayal, and hate. We might not have been meant to be together, but falling in love with him was the most exhilarating thing I’ve ever done in my life.
“The debt is never going to be settled, piccolo.” My body shudders as the memory of that very conversation floods into me.
“Why?” I cry out as he pulls me closer to his mouth. His hot breath is on my face, and he smells like bourbon and man. Sweat still lines his brow, and blood seeps through the bandage on his shoulder.
“Because now it’s I who is indebted to you…”
This is his repayment to me. His way of thanking me, by making sure I’m free of the pain. I’ll no longer have to deal with Mack or anyone else trying to harm me. I also don’t have to worry about getting arrested for killing two people. Enzo covered everything for me. I’ll no longer have to fear for my life.
What he doesn’t understand is that I’d rather fear for my life if I could just have him with me. I would have chosen to be on the run for the rest of my life just to be with him.
“Come on, Amara. You can’t spend all your time in this bedroom,” Jared says from the doorway.
Burying myself deeper into the pillow, I scream. I want to hurt someone. Something. Anything to help dull the pain slicing through my chest. People say time heals all wounds, but I think it’s a lie. Wounds don’t heal. We just learn to deal with the pain after a while.
“Jared, I will pull a fucking knife on you if you come in here and tell me what to do again.” I have no filter. I have no reason to care if I hurt others. I’m out of control. Like a feral animal, I’ll attack anything or anyone who gets too close.
“You don’t scare me.” Jared snorts. He is getting used to my threats. “I care about you, and even though I know he’s gone, you have to carry—”
“Shut up,” I scream, not wanting to hear him. I don’t want the words to be said simply because it makes the ache in my chest worse. Nothing makes it more apparent than having the truth spoken, and I’m not ready to face the truth.
“God, Amara. It’s been two fucking weeks,” Jared all but screams, his temper rising with every word.
“Two weeks, Jared. Do you hear yourself? Two fucking weeks since I lost the person who made me breathe. The person who I lived for.” I sit up in bed, throwing the pillow at him. He catches it with one hand, throwing me a dirty look.
“Look, I know it hurts but—”
“What the hell do you know about love, Jared?” All he does is stare back at me. We both know he doesn’t have a fucking clue about love—what it entails, how it makes your heart race. How it makes your palms sweat, your eyes dilate, how every hair on your body stands on end when your other half walks into the room.
“One more week, Amara. One more week is all you get before we leave here, and you get your shit together.”
“Fuck you,” I spit at him hatefully. I’m an adult. I can do whatever I want to do.
As I rifle around the bedroom for clothes, I think back to the moment we drove away. I should’ve been mad at him. I should’ve fought harder. I should’ve made him leave...
I hear the doorbell ring off in the distance, distracting me for a millisecond before I return to finding something to wear. I pull on a pair of jeans and push my feet into my boots.
Muffled male voices carry through the house, making me think someone actually came inside. Who the fuck? My first thought is the FBI, and my heart starts to race in my chest. No… I’m safe. Enzo made sure of that.
The voices grow louder until I decide I need to see what the fuck is going on. My hands grip the blade in my hand—the one his mother gave him. It’s the only thing I have left of him, and I haven’t let it leave my sight.
I open my door, and the sound of a voice I know very well meets my ears. An image of the whiskey-colored eyes matching that voice pops into my head. His breathtaking smirk, the way his muscles move with him in an elegant manner. He is here.
The second my brain catches up, I shoot off like a rocket. I sprint down the hall, not even caring how insane I must look. I won’t stop for anything until I see him with my own eyes, until I feel his skin against my own.
I find him standing at the front door, Jared and James saying something, but I don’t hear their words. My mind is overtaken by the fact that Enzo is here.
He barely sees me coming before I throw my body at him. Wrapping my arms around him, I pant against his chest, happy tears falling from my eyes.
“Piccolo…” he whispers into my hair while cupping the back of my head. I melt into his touch as I sob in relief. I thought I would never hear him say that again. After ten minutes of standing in the same position, I release him.
Out of the corner of my eye, I see the space around us is empty. Jared and our father left us alone at some point.
“I’m so sorry I hurt you. I’m so fucking sorry.” His apology is sincere, and as I stare into his eyes, I can see the pain we both share.
“Where were you?” I question right away. “Why are you not in jail? Not that I’m complaining that you are not, I just want to know.”
“I was being held by the FBI. Eli was there too.”
“You were with Eli?”
“Yes. Eli has been working for the FBI all along. It’s a long story. And I promise I’ll tell you every single detail, but the most important thing right now is that I’m here, and that I won’t be leaving again. I kind of made a deal with the FBI.” His eyes twinkle as he smirks at me.
“What kind of deal?”
“I know you want me to leave this life, and I know I promised you I would, but how would you feel about compromising?”
“Yes!” I blurt out.
He laughs. “You don’t even know the details yet.”
“I don’t care anymore. I just want to be with you, I don’t care about the rest.” With everything in me, I jump on him. Wrapping
myself around him, I kiss him with a fierceness I can’t contain.
“I love you,” I whisper softly against his lips.
“I love you, too, piccolo.”
Extended Epilogue
Four Years Later
Amara
“Fuck,” I whisper under my breath and let my head lull to the side. I’m exhausted. Enzo has been gone for two weeks now on a business trip overseas. Over the last five years, he’s turned his businesses more legitimate.
Over the last five years, he’s been working with the FBI to keep heinous crimes to a minimum. Underage prostitution and human trafficking have been eliminated in Enzo’s territory, and hopefully, it will stay that way for a very long time.
Me? Well, I’ve been busy with school full time, all while taking care of Gia, our beautiful little angel. Without Enzo here, I feel like I’m losing my motherfucking mind.
This is my final year of college. I decided to study music, following in my mom’s footsteps to become a music teacher.
“Don’t say naughty words, Mommy.” Gia frowns at my swearing. I roll my eyes and smile. She’s just like her daddy—same eyes, same smile, same glint in her eyes.
“Mommy didn’t mean to say a naughty word.” I smile, bending down to set a bowl of mixed fruit in front of her. The clock on the wall says three p.m.—a half hour separating me from seeing my husband again.
When I married him, I never expected my life to become this mundane. Most days, I miss the fast-paced life we once had. The crazy no holds barred sex, the danger and chaos that surrounded us. Now life is just that… Life.
“Daddy coming home?” Gia asks me, pulling me from my thoughts as I sit down on the floor in front of her. I nod my head, yes.
I’m taking all next week off from school. I’ve told my professors I have a family emergency just so I can clear my mind and spend time with Enzo. I also contemplated doing something that would make him mad, maybe jealous…just to spice it up a little.