"She's in the garden picking flowers for the kitchen vase." Kris raised her chin, expecting nothing more from him. He'd made it perfectly clear where they stood now and where their relationship would go in the future. Nowhere.
He stared at her for a second, then turned away to find his daughter.
Despite her overwrought feelings, Kris could not help noticing the engaging tilt of his head and his broad shoulders, narrow hips, and strong legs in the tight cords he wore. It irritated her to no end that she could still find him desirable. If only...if only he could like her, just a little. If only he would trust her.
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* * *
Chapter Twenty-One
PJ had noticed her distracted attitude, and Kris worked to pull herself together in order to behave as naturally as possible. Together they made plans to return to the one place that felt like a haven...the sunshine and tranquility of the Algarve. The atmosphere there was relaxed with an air of quiet elegance and comfort, not too formal, yet not too casual. Simply a place to be proud of, be at ease. A place she could call home.
The journey was uneventful; they were both getting used to catching planes and waiting for cars. However, Jump's joyous welcome was something she would never get used to and made it a warm homecoming.
PJ rushed around to see if everything was as she'd left it. Kris marveled at how the little girl had settled down. She had become more confident and enjoyed life as a child should. Kris knew in her heart that she had much to do with it. Which is why I am in this predicament, she thought ruefully.
There was still plenty to do, plenty to keep her mind busy which could only do her good. The garden needed altering and attention, but this was something she also enjoyed doing. Raoul's aim to get the place in tip-top shape had nothing to do with his spur-of-the-moment marriage. He had already sent her to do the job before then. Raoul had rattled off once about the house saying "The time has come for me to give the property a little more thought. I'm a businessman, after all, and neglected property is not part of my image." However, she had hoped that when her refurbishing had been completed, he would have no wish to dispose of it. There, in this house of her creation, she felt that she could survive the days that lay ahead and cope with her peculiar circumstances.
...x...
The days passed into weeks and the sun tanned Kris to a golden hue. Her sickness had passed and she was the picture of radiant, glowing health. She viewed her slightly thickening waistline with mixed feelings. She really wanted this baby and knew she would be a good mother.
But what about Raoul? At the time of the baby's conception, she felt as if she had kindled some deeper feelings in Raoul, despite his subsequent attitude. So, maybe -- with time -- he would come to love the child...as well as herself. Treasuring the memory of the times when he'd touched her gently, with passionate tenderness, she kept her hopes alive that one day they would share more than a few scattered moments of intimacy.
As the memories surfaced, she also remembered that every time they'd become intimate he had turned angry, more with himself than with her. Why? Had he been disgusted at his own dominating sexuality? Or did he feel that he was being unfaithful to his deceased wife?
No, she knew that wasn't the reason. Was he afraid of his own heights of passion? Or had she wounded and challenged his masculinity and prowess as a lover with her inability to find her own completion? The simple fact remained that she knew she was inadequate when making love. The knowledge did its own damage and bit into her self-confidence until she felt emotionally drained. She shouldn't allow such thoughts to overtake her, though -- for her own self-preservation.
During the next few weeks, Raoul didn't visit, but he phoned periodically. Whenever he would speak to Kris, he would be curt and to the point. His voice only softened when he asked about her health. He would listen and then tell her to "take better care of herself". Needless to say, at the close of the conversation she was confused and drained.
But Kris could hear the joy in his voice when he spoke to PJ. His laughter was something she missed dearly.
How could she convince him that he was indeed the father of the baby she carried? He was so sure she had slept with a lover, conveniently putting aside the incident with her at his poolside. Had he so easily forgotten himself as a lover?
A few days later, she sat down and wrote two letters. One to Carl, informing him of her marriage, but not mentioning the baby, and the other to Raoul. If he wouldn't listen to her directly, then maybe he'd read her letter.
Within twelve days, she had two letters in reply. The one she'd written to Raoul was marked "Return to Sender". Kris sighed wearily, saddened that he hadn't even opened the letter. He knew that if she'd needed him urgently, she would've called. She crossed out that idea for future reference.
Carl's was full of news. He wrote: Dearest Kris,
I can't credit the fact that you have married Metier. I sincerely hope you knew what you were doing, and of course, hope that you will be happy. However, in my humble opinion, he is an arrogant and self-centered bastard who will cause you nothing but grief.
Anyway, sister of mine, we can have a good talk in a couple of weeks because I am bringing the family back for a while since I have business to take care of. Surprise, surprise -- Angela is pregnant! I want her examined by a good doctor, not one of our local fatal patels. I only hope you will be as happy as I am.
She'd never known him write such a long letter. Angela has changed my whole life around, and the kids love her to pieces. Naturally, the new baby is a source of delight to us all. Fate was very kind to me that day I saw you again, and when we went to the party, my life changed forever, for there stood Angela. I'm sure I must be boring you going on about her like this. The kids' mother never saw them much until I remarried, and now she wants them all the time. We believe that she is jealous, but Angela -- being a dear -- sorted out the mess smoothly and things are back to normal. They still see little of their mother, who is back to being a swinging single. I'll phone as soon as we arrive. I have not finalized the dates as of yet.
I'm looking forward to seeing you again. Chin up and don't forget -- we are going to talk.
Your loving bro,
Carl
She sighed, wishing she could be so enthusiastic. If she had stayed in her flat and not listened to Lauren's well-meaning intentions about finding a job, this would never have happened. Then again, her friend didn't deserve the blame; she could have turned tail and fled after the interview.
She admitted how difficult that would have been. Raoul was like no man she had ever met. He had intimidated her from the beginning, and she had a distinctly uneasy feeling about the whole relationship, yet she had continued with it. Why? She couldn't blame that on Lauren! If only she had walked away, she would be living an ordered life with no emotional ups and downs.
However, if that had been the case, Carl wouldn't be back in her life. Living proof that some good always comes out of every situation.
...x...
About two weeks later, Raoul sent a fax saying that he needed a break and would be returning for about a week or so. Before he could relax, though, Luke and half a dozen colleagues would be joining him to finalise some negotiations. He said that they would be bringing their wives. He clearly stated that he wanted her to see to the necessary arrangements and to contact the office for the list of names.
Kris smiled sadly at the last sentence, shaking her head. Whatever else he thought of her, he knew that she would perform without fuss and also to perfection. Quite simply, he took her for granted.
Her body tensed suddenly when she realised that Carl and his family would be back, too -- what a quirk of timing. It would still be virtually impossible to sort things out as soon as Raoul arrived since people would surround him. He'd most likely only have time to talk to her in passing.
She prayed that there would be no scene until she could get him alone. And then, with any luck, she would make him listen.
* * *
Chapter Twenty-Two
All was ready on the day of Raoul's return. She placed fresh flowers in the rooms to fill the air with fragrance. Kris was pleased with her efforts and knew that he could not be anything other than satisfied with the revamp of his investment.
PJ busied herself by drawing a welcome card for her father. Kris decided to change into something fairly loose and casual to prevent Raoul from noticing her thickening waistline. She emphasized her long neck and delicate shoulders by wearing twisted beads of cool blues and greens. She piled her hair high on top of her head, and on a crazy impulse, put several flowers around the loose chignon. She slipped her feet into high-heeled strap-on sandals, noting with satisfaction that her ankles were still slim and her legs were long and tanned.
Moments after she finished dressing, she heard the purr of an automobile. With a growing knot in her stomach, she went down to greet Raoul and two men she had never seen before. Acting to perfection, Raoul put his hands on her shoulders and pressed his lips to her forehead.
"Good seeing you, cherie, you look well." For a brief moment, his eyes looked deeply into hers, searching, before he turned away.
"I would like you to meet Franco Buono and Jason Richards. My wife, Kris...oh, there's my daughter, PJ!" He laughed as an animated bundle of child and dog rushed around the side of the building. PJ hurled herself into his arms.
"Daddy, Daddy!" He swung her into the air while the dog barked and gamboled beside them. "What did you bring me, Daddy?" He set her on the ground and she reached into his pockets, making him laugh in delight.
"What did I bring you? My goodness, have I forgotten your birthday? It's not Christmas, is it?" With mock horror, he playfully slapped his forehead with the palm of his hand, making a comical face.
"You did bring me something...you did, you did!" With renewed vigour, she dug deeper to search his pockets. Her eyes opened wide in disappointment when she found nothing but his change.
"Oh, Daddy, you didn't? But you always do, why did you forget? You silly thing -- you know it's not my birthday or Christmas, but you always bring me something." Before her eyes filled with reproach, he turned her to face the car.
"Nor did I forget this time, sweetheart. Go and look on the backseat. Run along now, I have some important things to talk about." Playfully he patted her bottom. "Go on. I'll see you soon."
She scampered off to the car, shrieking with delight as she brought out a big box. Without even shutting the door, she rushed back to her father's side.
Kris realised it was not the time or place to have an excited child running about, so she tactfully took PJ's hand before she had a chance to unwrap the gift.
"Come, PJ, you heard what your Daddy said. He's busy at the moment, so let's go onto the veranda and see what you have there. After that I must get everyone a drink. It is such a hot day."
PJ flopped down to the veranda and tore into the box. Opening the lid with a flourish, she found a beautiful baby doll, complete with a change of clothes and all of the extras tucked neatly inside. She was enchanted. Leaving her absorbed in the gift, Kris fetched ice and returned to the lounge.
The sight of her handsome husband standing by the window sent a shiver through her body. Dear God...he had some strange power over her. She realised that he held her life and her heart in the palm of his hand. As he does with all of his minions, she thought truthfully. Jump and they all jump, and I am no exception.
The deep timbre of his voice delighted her every time she heard it. If only she could've heard that deep sexy voice saying how much he loved her during their intimate moments.
Coming back to reality, she blinked rapidly and started her role as a superior hostess, offering drinks and small talk before other guests arrived.
Soon there was a happy clamour of voices as the lounge and veranda spilled over with Raoul's friends and associates. Their admiration for the house and garden made Kris feel appreciated, but she only wanted to hear it from one man. The one that had been avoiding her all evening.
Luke's arrival was a relief. He pulled her off to the side. "I am sorry I haven't been able to see you before, but dear Raoul has been a slave driver and has had everyone's nose to the grindstone. He seems to be acting like a man possessed. I can't believe what has gotten into him, or understand why he hasn't been to see you more...being newly married. Is there something I should know?"
Kris turned away with a sharp intake of breath, nearly in tears. Putting his hands on her shoulders, he turned her around to face him. Grasping her chin, he tilted it up and looked hard into her eyes.
"Kris, what is it? You know you can trust me."
"Not now, Luke. If I start to cry I won't be able to stop. That's all I am short of. Please, let me go -- we can talk later." She broke away, throwing over her shoulder. "I promise." Giving him a fixed smile, she hurried to see to the needs of her guests.
She found that avoiding Raoul had never been easier, but Luke was a different matter. She knew he was fond of her and would be worried that she was so tense. He made a point of being at her side to help when he could.
After a buffet lunch, everyone sat around contentedly sipping coffee. Raoul played the part of the perfect host, offering liqueurs while Kris and Almeira put the uneaten food back into the fridges.
Once again, Luke had found her and entered the kitchen. Almeira excused herself and Kris found she couldn't be rude to Luke. He was only looking out for a friend.
"Kris, I know something is wrong and I want to get to the bottom of it. We can go for a walk and now is as good a time as any. Give me five minutes to change and I'll meet you on the beach. No one will miss you for the moment. I'll give PJ a shout, too. She won't be in the way while we talk and she and Jump can run along with us."
"No. Luke, please...."
"Okay, then we'll talk here, right now." He grinned and seated himself on the kitchen table, crossing his arms deliberately.
She laughed at his natural stubbornness. "All right, we'll go for a walk. But I need to change my shoes. You go on and I'll see you in five minutes. I had better clear it with Raoul first."
"I'll do that as I go through and I'll call PJ, too. Just get yourself on that beach."
"Yes, sir." She saluted the man solemnly and they both laughed.
...x...
Luke studied Kris while the breeze whipped her sarong against her figure. She walked confidently towards them, her shoes kicking up the white sand. A sad smile lit her face and Luke watched her thoughtfully as she came closer.
When they were out of PJ's hearing distance, he asked softly, "You're pregnant, aren't you?"
Her eyes immediately filled with tears. "Is it that obvious? I mean...am I showing? I've tried to hide it. Oh, Luke everything is such a mess."
Kindly he said, "Just tell me all, and I am sure I can help somehow."
That particular topic wasn't something she found easy to discuss. She was such a private person at the best of times, but she managed to get it all out without undue elaboration. She also told him that Raoul didn't think the baby was his. Luke looked incredulous.
"But, Kris, how can he for one second accuse you of lying?"
She started to cry and he held her until her sobs stopped. Kris was thankful that PJ played happily with Jump ahead of them, and that she didn't notice the scene behind her.
"Who the hell does he think the father is, for goodness sake?"
"Carl."
"Carl?" He was nonplussed. "Carl! My God, he's your brother. What a frightful accusation. What on earth prompted this?"
"He doesn't know he is my brother, that's the problem. They have never formally met. The first time he saw him, we had a flaming row and you know how he is if he doesn't want to listen -- you can't explain anything." She paused, eyes brimming with tears again. "He seemed to hate Carl without reason, without even knowing his name, let alone his relationship to me."
PJ ran over to show them
some sea shells. Kris exclaimed with excitement about their colors and sizes, enjoying the child's delight. She waited until PJ had walked ahead before continuing.
"You may not know it, Luke, but we have a rather strained relationship at the best of times as it is. When I said Carl's name, hoping to tell him who he really was, he shut me up at once. I can get bolshy too, but this has gotten completely out of hand. I feel as though I'm in a nightmare. I wonder why he married me in the first place, and why I agreed, considering we seem to be at each other's throats all the time. When he heard I was pregnant, he was furious. I can't tell you how angry he was with me and the awful things he said when he accused me of having an affair with Carl. I was shattered. Oh, Luke, this is so horrible." She broke off for a second. "Luke, we only...oh, this is so degrading to admit. I can't believe I'm pregnant! I can't believe this happened to me!"
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