Role of a Lifetime

by Wilhelm, Amanda

  "Yes."

  "Okay," she said, "All but Lia's room, that's a disaster."

  She showed him the whole, er, most of the house, giving him the low down on the renovations. The fun and amazing stuff like finding the batch of letters that someone had stashed under a floorboard prior to the civil war. The not so fun stuff, like the cracked support beams and the electrician practically vomiting when he saw the panel. By the time they got back downstairs, and she and Kelly went to the kitchen she felt much better. Her home was her sanctuary, after all. She always felt safe here. As long as she remembered not to ever look at those damn pictures. She led Kelly out the back door of the kitchen, pointing out the garden and leading the way to the tiny orchard. The remainder of the property was wooded.

  "Do you want to see if we can find any peaches?" she said, "I was going to make a peach cobbler later."

  "Peach cobbler, that doesn't sound healthy."

  "Well it's mostly peaches, mostly."

  He kissed her and she kissed him back. Then Lia yelled from the house that Dylan was there.

  "Who's Dylan?" Kelly said.

  "Lia's boyfriend."

  Her arms were around his waist and it all felt so good. His arms around her, the smell of him, even the bulge in his pants pressing up against her hip. It felt good and she thought for a minute how it could be, if Lia wasn't home, if they could lie down together right there, the sweet smell of the peaches saturating the air, she could almost feel it, every scent molecule heavy against the bare skin on her arms and legs. She wanted it, she wanted more, she wanted Kelly, to feel his bare skin up against hers, all of it, and the slightly cool, slightly moist, very sweet air surrounding the rest of her.

  "Mom!"

  She moaned a little as he pulled away from her and when he looked down at her she looked away quickly, embarrassed. He cleared his throat loudly.

  "Dylan, huh?" he said, "Do you like him?"

  "Well," Holly said.

  Chapter 17

  Kelly looked at Holly as they headed back to the house. He couldn't tell if she was having trouble with the question or if she was just trying to recover from getting all worked up. He jerked one of his legs out a little on his next step, trying to get a little more comfortable, but it didn't work.

  "You don't know if you like him?" he asked, more to distract himself than to get an answer.

  "I have mixed feelings, sometimes."

  Kelly stole a glance at her, wondering what exactly she was talking about. She had been hot for him a minute ago, he was sure of it. If Lia wasn't back at the house that tiny little moan Holly had let escape would have been all he needed. Would he have eased her back up against one of the trees or down on the ground underneath him? Dammit, now it was downright painful to walk and he cleared his throat again.

  "Are they going to the same college?" he asked, "Or is he in college already?"

  "No, they started dating over Christmas, they hadn't even applied to the same schools. He's going to a different school about an hour and a half from where Lia's going. She talks about how they are going to work it out, all the time," Holly stopped and Kelly turned to her. "He's her first serious boyfriend. She never dated anyone for more than a couple of weeks, before this, I think, it just worries me sometimes, I think about how naive I was at that age,"

  "Mom?"

  Lia was standing out of the back patio with, Kelly guessed, Dylan.

  "Hey," Holly said, "Hi Dylan. Dylan this is Kelly, Kelly, Dylan."

  "Hello," Kelly said and held out his hand. Dylan smirked and shook it. Kelly turned his attention back to Lia. "When do you leave for college?" he asked. He was directing the question at both of the kids but only Lia answered him.

  "Eleven days!" Lia said.

  "Shopping and packing, that's all we've been doing," Holly said, "Mostly shopping."

  "I've got to go get changed," Lia said, "We're going up to the beach, Dylan said."

  "The beach?" Holly asked as Lia went into the house.

  "Yeah, there's a seafood festival, supposed to be pretty cool," Dylan said.

  "The same one we went to yesterday?" Kelly asked, confused.

  As huge as the festival was it was hard to imagine there was another one happening the same weekend, even at a different beach.

  "Yes the same one," Holly said shortly, "I'm going to get some water, you want something Kelly, water?"

  She went into the kitchen and Kelly followed her, Dylan trotting behind them.

  "Do you have any soda?" Dylan asked as he hopped up on the counter.

  "Nope, no soda," Holly said as she pulled a couple of glasses out of a cabinet.

  "Oh right," Dylan said, "No soda in this house," he said, grinning at Kelly, "she thinks it's evil or something."

  "Water, Kelly, or seltzer? I have plain and flavored, ummm, peach," Holly said looking at a bottle in the fridge.

  "Water's fine," Kelly said.

  He would have asked for a beer just to show the kid up, Kelly was sure Holly had some. She had phoned him from the store while she was buying it, specifically to ask what Kelly he liked. But since he couldn't sweep Dylan's scrawny ass off Holly's counter, which he was sorely tempted to do, Kelly would at least drink the water. It was too early for a beer anyway.

  "Here," she said as she handed it to him.

  "Thank you," he said and raised the glass to his mouth.

  He thought about it and produced a very satisfied and realistic "ah" after he chugged half of it down. Any director he had ever worked for would have been over the moon with that performance. Kelly set the glass down on the counter next to Dylan, mentally willing the kid to say something, but Dylan just pulled out his phone.

  "So who are you guys going to the beach with?" Holly asked Dylan.

  Maybe Dylan didn't hear her or maybe he was ignoring her. Either way now Kelly was fighting the temptation to pick Dylan up and toss him through the window onto the patio. He got a small amount of satisfaction poking Dylan roughly in the shoulder with his index finger.

  "Hey?" Dylan said looking up, "WTF?"

  "Mrs...Lia's mom asked you a question. "

  Kelly was going to go with Mrs. Sawyer, then he realized he didn't know if she used Mrs. Or Miss. Or Ms. And that brought him back to the whole dead husband problem. But he thought he recovered okay.

  "Well I didn't hear her," Dylan said, rubbing his shoulder.

  "Who are you guys going to the beach with?" Holly asked again.

  "No one, okay, just us."

  "Okay, I’m ready," Lia said as she came into the kitchen.

  Kelly looked at Lia long enough to appreciate how pretty she was and what she must look like to a teenage boy. Then he looked at Dylan who was looking at Lia like she was a piece of meat that Dylan couldn't wait to sink his teeth into. Then he watched Holly look from Lia to Dylan back to Lia again and Holly looked like she wanted to cry.

  "Do you want to put some sunblock on before you go Lia?" Holly asked.

  "We can put it on when we get there," Dylan said.

  "No, it's okay," Lia took a bottle of sunblock spray from a basket on the counter, "Mom, can you spray me? Out on the patio?"

  "Sure."

  Lia and Holly went out on the patio and Lia slipped off her t-shirt. Lia turned back to the house and smiled at them, well Dylan probably, through the screen door while Holly sprayed Lia's back and shoulders. Dylan grinned wildly and then looked at Kelly who met his look with the fiercest scowl he had. But Dylan didn't stop grinning.

  Get. Off. The. Counter. Kelly yelled in his mind.

  Holly and Lia came back into the kitchen and Dylan jumped off the counter (finally!). A second later Kelly was ready to pick him up and slam him back on the counter, preferably with a choke hold, when Dylan slipped his hand around Lia's bare waist.

  "Okay have fun," Holly said and Lia gave her half a hug, "Put your shirt back on."

  "I'm still sticky, I will as soon as it dries," Lia said, "Bye, Mr. Rockport."

  "Kelly,
" Kelly said.

  "Bye Kelly, bye mom."

  Lia and Dylan left the kitchen and Holly and Kelly waited in silence until they heard the slam of the front door.

  "You okay?" Kelly asked.

  "Yes, I," Holly stopped and went out of the kitchen and down the hall.

  Kelly followed her but stopped in the kitchen doorway. He leaned against it and listened to Dylan pull away, way too fast for the dirt driveway, in Kelly's estimation. Kelly watched Holly come back down the hall to the kitchen and now he was sure of it, she was sad, and worried too, that was it.

  "Hey," he said, and grabbed her in a hug as she approached him.

  "I just don't know, I mean, I told Lia they could come with us yesterday, I even offered to pay for it."

  "Well they probably," Kelly stopped. He had been about to say that the kids wanted to be alone. Which was undoubtedly the truth. But as Kelly had a very clear understanding of why they wanted to be alone, at least, or perhaps especially, Dylan, he changed his mind about what he wanted to say fast. "They just don't want a couple of parents, I mean parent types, hanging around."

  "You're probably right," Holly said, "When she was in fifth, no fourth grade, she told me not to meet her at the mailbox anymore, when the bus dropped her off, I mean. She said, these are her exact words, by the way, I don't want my friends to know I have a mother."

  They both chuckled at that and Kelly moved his hand from his waist to caress her cheek. His thoughts were only on the fact that they now had the house to themselves, for many, many hours and he was about to kiss her when she pulled away.

  "We can go get some peaches now," she said, and went into the kitchen and, rifling through one of the cabinets, came up with a bowl. She held it up triumphantly. "Oh wait, shoot."

  "What?" Kelly asked.

  "We still have that chocolate cake from last night too," she said as she grabbed the water glass Kelly had left on the counter and put it in the dishwasher, "Oh wait, no we don't," she said looking down into the sink, "Look."

  Kelly came over and looked down into the sink with her. The take out box from the night before was sitting in the sink, open and half filled with sudsy water.

  "Lia must have found it and eaten it, for breakfast," Holly said, "Sorry, hope you're not too disappointed."

  "I'll survive."

  "Well, let me grab some peaches then," Holly said and headed out the back door of the kitchen.

  Kelly followed her, hoping that he could recreate the moment Lia had interrupted earlier, but he never got the chance. Holly scoured the trees for the ripest peaches with laser focus. Ten minutes later they were back in the kitchen with a bowl full of peaches and Kelly was very disappointed. But it had nothing to do with dessert, chocolate or otherwise.

  Chapter 18

  "Mom?"

  "What?"

  "Can I," Lia hesitated, and Holly waited but Lia just looked down at the floor and didn't continue.

  "What honey?"

  "Well I was just wondering if I could take one of these pictures, for my dorm room."

  Holly followed Lia's gaze to the living room wall. It's not a big deal, she told herself. All the kids are going to have pictures of their families. Heck, half the kids in her dorm probably suffered through their parent's divorce. So Lia thinks her father, and her parent's marriage, was perfect. So what.

  "Sure honey," Holly said, "Which one?"

  Lia studied them carefully and pointed to the one that Holly remembered they had taken when Lia was about four months old.

  "This one?"

  "Sure," Holly said, "Should we wrap it in newspaper? Or one of your towels maybe?"

  She turned around to one of the plastic tubs that were scattered around the living room. Storage was limited in the dorm room, so Holly planned on helping Lia unpack and organize, then taking the tubs back home.

  "How come I'm so smiley in this one?" Lia asked.

  "Oh, you loved Old MacDonald, the song," Holly said, "So I just told the photographer to sing E I E I O and you started smiling. Some of the other photos, it wasn't so easy, believe me. We had a CD with Old MacDonald and if you started crying in the car I just put that on and you would stop crying instantly, most of the time anyway," Holly rummaged through the bin and opened up a towel part way down, "We'll just slide it in here, give it to me."

  "Okay," Lia said, then "Oh no."

  "What?" Holly said. She stood up and turned around, worried. The plastic lid clattered to the floor. "What is it?"

  "Look," Lia said, pointing.

  Holly followed Lia's finger to the wall where Lia was pointing. Where she saw the spot where Lia had removed the photo Holly burst out laughing. She looked at Lia and Lia looked confused.

  "Oh honey, it's fine," Holly said. There was an almost perfect rectangle several shades darker than the wall around it. "This room gets a ton of sun and we haven't painted it," Holly paused, thinking, "Since we moved in."

  Holly took the frame from Lia's hand and turned back to the bin. Over the years they had lived there, Lia's room had been painted several times. They had started with a sunny, but not too bright, yellow. Then Lia had been all about pink so they had painted it again when she was around six or seven. At ten Lia decided she hated pink so they went back to white. In middle school Lia had wanted indigo and Holly had been slightly horrified but had finally relented. Lia's room got quite a bit of light (when she was up before noon to open the shades that is) and when it was done Holly had to admit it was quite striking, in a good way, with the white trim and built-ins.

  "Have I painted at all since we moved in?" Holly asked Lia as she closed the box back up again, "Other than your room that is?"

  "Yes, the kitchen Mom."

  "Oh right," Holly said, "Well, I guess I have my first big project then."

  Lia sat down on the couch and Holly sat down next to her. Holly held her arm out and Lia snuggled up beside her. Holly wrapped her arm around Lia's shoulder and pulled her in a little tighter. Then she let up but didn't let go.

  "Excited? Nervous?" Holly asked, "Both?"

  "Both, I guess," Lia said.

  "More of one than the other?"

  "Well, I'm really excited about school, but not so excited about..."

  "About?" Holly asked.

  "Well, Dylan, mostly," Lia said, "I mean, he really wants to pledge a fraternity and that's a lot of time, right? And we're going to be so far apart."

  "A hundred miles isn't that far apart Lia," Holly said. That got her an eye roll from her daughter so, figuring she had nothing to lose, Holly continued, "You guys are both very young you know."

  "Same age as you and dad were when you met," Lia retorted, "You met freshman year of college remember?"

  First week I was there, Holly thought grimly and changed the subject.

  "Let's just worry about getting you to college okay," Holly said. "Let's get the car completely packed up tonight so we don't have to deal with it in the morning. We should leave around eight?"

  "Ugh."

  "Eight-thirty?"

  "Mom!"

  "Okay, ten, how's ten?"

  "Better, barely."

  "Okay so we'll pack the car and do you want to go out to dinner tonight?"

  "Ummm, I can't."

  "Why?"

  "I'm going out with Dylan."

  "Oh, okay," Holly said, glancing at the clock on the mantle. It was almost four, so eighteen or so hours and her daughter would be on her way to college. Please let her be okay, Holly prayed to, somebody or something, she didn't even know. "He doesn't leave for a couple more days, does he?"

  "No," Lia said glumly.

  "Okay, so maybe we'll go out to lunch after we get you unpacked at the dorm, how does that sound?"

  Holly wondered briefly if Dylan expected to tag along on the trip tomorrow, but she was afraid to ask in case it came out sounding like an offer.

  "Okay Mom."

  Together they finished packing and managed to wrestle all the stuff into the car. To L
ia's surprise, but not Holly's, it didn't all fit and Holly managed to convince Lia to leave her warmest clothes home.

  "I'll come pick up your summer stuff and bring that stuff out with me when I do," Holly said, "Just leave it packed so I know what to bring. It wasn't going to all fit in the closet anyway."

  When they were done Lia went to shower and Holly decided, since she was a sweaty mess anyway, to head out to the barn and work. She had some individual pieces that she had finally fired. Holly was painting some very intricate details when she heard Dylan pull up in the driveway. She set the down the fine paintbrush she was using and waited, but Lia didn't stop in to say goodbye. When Holly heard the car leave she leapt up and raced over to the door. She didn't bother to hide behind the door and peek out, she was certain neither Dylan or Lia would be looking back.

  She worked until way past dinner time, then cleaned up and went back to the house. She had a message from Kelly asking if she wanted to Skype later and she tried him after her shower but he didn't pick up. She wasn't too disappointed. She was sad, really sad, and talking to Kelly, or anyone, seemed like a lot of work.

  Holly was reading in the living room when she heard the car coming up the driveway. She waited but when Lia didn't come inside and she could hear them talking on the front porch Holly went up to her room.

  After well over an hour (Holly knew because she spent the time watching the clock) Lia came in the house and up the stairs. Holly stood inside her bedroom, her ear up to the closed door and listened to the sounds of Lia in the bathroom, brushing her teeth and washing her face. When Lia was done Holly waited, listening to the soft steps of Lia heading down the hallway to her room. When Lia closed her door, Holly opened her own. That's when the crying started.

  Holly froze in her doorway. She longed to go to her daughter, hold her and comfort her. But she knew Lia and Lia would most likely just clamp up as soon as she saw her Mom and sometimes a person just needed a good cry. If this was, mostly likely, one of these times, Holly didn't want Lia to stop on her account.

  So instead Holly slid down to the floor and waited, leaning against the door jam, until the crying stopped. Then she crawled into her bed. Then it was her turn.