by Xyla Turner
I had several meetings off campus today, which I welcomed because I didn’t necessarily want the reminders of my rejection staring me in the face – meaning my office. I chose not to think about Mr. Aroma, which is why I blocked his number in my iPhone and I also did not plan to answer any numbers that I did not know. That is what I do. Cut it all the way off.
By the time dinner time rolled around, I went to one of my favorite lounges that just happened to have great food along with good entertainment. Watching the live Jazz performance and spoken word, put me in a better space mentally. I loved the atmosphere, it made the world seem happier, grittier and just plain inspiring.
The #2 train was delayed, but after ten minutes of waiting on the empty platform, I finally arrived to my apartment. There was an idle car with lights on the left side of my street, it looked like Xavier. It was a late model Jaguar, shiny and black, like he drove it straight off the dealer’s lot. It also stood out like a sore thumb in this neighborhood. He was just warning me about the crime rate, but he might want to heed his own warning.
Quickly turning around, I walked around the block, so I was behind him and literally slunk behind a couple as they walked into the apartment building. They had to think I was crazy, but I honestly did not want any Aroma hassle tonight. It had been such a good day. I went in, kept the lights off and committed to working in the dark. I did not call Kevin because I didn’t want him in the middle of. That was another thing Kevin and I did not do – deal with each other’s drama.
One evening, Kevin was over and I guess one of his girls followed him to my apartment. I answered the door and little Miss green wig wanted to fight me. He told her off something fierce. I felt sorry for her by the time he was done. She left in tears, but I told him, my mood was shot. We did not hook up for a while after that, until one day I came home and found some Jamaican food (the same thing he had our first time together) sitting outside my door. It was cute. I called him to thank him, so he came over to eat it off me again.
About an hour later, I heard a knock on the door. I dare not move a muscle. There was another knock, then my phone started to vibrate. Quickly, I shut it all the way off because the vibrations seemed louder than the ringer. This number was blocked. One more knock, then I heard him take the stairs down. Whew, that was close. I am not sure if I could keep this hiding up all week, but I was done with that man. He needed to move on.
I kept reading my book until an email notification popped on the screen of my iPad. I opened the Gmail app and read:
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To: [email protected]
From: [email protected]
Date: July 21, 2014
Time: 11:57 PM (EST)
Subject:
Where the fuck are you?
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Oh, he was mad.
I decide not to respond and blocked his emails as well. That’s how I cut people off. He must not know ‘bout me. (In my Beyoncé voice)
I went to sleep and rested like a baby.
Wednesday, was not so uneventful. It was good in a way because we had our end of school year ceremony with the students. We gave out awards, honors, celebrated parents, teachers and community members. It was awesome. Until an unexpected guest came and he looked livid, Mr. Aroma himself, in a dark tailor suit with a dark gaze to match. He came in, while the guest speaker was talking and sat in the back of the auditorium, staring. My internal smirk hopefully would stay hidden because little did he know, after the ceremony, the guest speaker and I were going to head out the back and go to lunch.
Take that, Mr. Aroma.
In all seriousness, this stalking me was not going to do. I figured his ego was bruised because he is an alpha male and he is used to getting what he wants. For example, he thinks because he commands me to wait for him, after he rejects me – that I will just be twiddling my thumbs in anticipation.
WRONG.
After the ceremony was over, I saw him stand up. The kids were ushered out the front, so I took the guest speaker back stage and we left for lunch. Before I left, I instructed Janice to hold my calls and informed her that there was a gentleman here to see me, but for her to give him a note.
The note read:
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Xavier,
We are through, so please leave me alone. Do not call me, come to my apartment, or my place of work. This is simply unprofessional. I have moved on and I wish you would do the same.
Good luck to you.
Xena
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Well, that was straight and to the point. Hopefully, he will get it. Not just the note, but the point.
Lunch was great, but I kept checking my phone to see if there were any problems. Apparently there were not, so I decided to call it an early day, just in case Mr. Aroma was still near the building. He could be persistent when he wanted, but hopefully the note solidified things for him.
When I arrived home, I changed my clothes, then I went to see the latest Hunger Games movie that recently hit theatres. As always, it was exhilarating, especially because I loved how Katniss stood up for her family and her community, fought for them and protected them with her own life. That was a trait I admired and strive to be for my family and community, hence why I started GRIT. Equipping kids with the tools to fight for their lives with a system that was setup to devour them, was my contribution or bow and arrow. That is why I like Hunger Games and the romantic part of course. Despite not liking her and Peta being together, that’s just wrong. He is not strong enough for her.
Finally arriving back home, with no one waiting, no fancy cars idling on the corner, and no notes on my door. Thank goodness! Maybe he finally got my point, I thought as I opened the door to see a letter on the floor. Dammit, I spoke too soon. The letter read:
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Xena,
Glad you think so.
X
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Oh boy!
This man is going to be a problem. What part of the letter was he talking about?
Placing the letter on my desk, I continued with my nightly routine. The last day of school was tomorrow and I needed to be ready for the festivities. It was going to be a day of fun-filled excitement. I did not sleep as soundly as I wanted because Mr. Aroma’s words haunted me. “Glad you think so.”
What?
The alarm clock rang, causing me to groan. Putting on my jogging outfit with GRIT t-shirt and visor, as today would be HOT. We were going to be at the park all day today with obstacle courses, sports tournaments, capture the flag, photo booths, board games, and much more. So the flier said. It was also going to be a hot sunny day, so we had plenty of cold bottled waters for everyone. This was definitely going to be an annual event. We had almost 100% student attendance, lots of parents and community members. There were teams, prizes, trophies, etc. About half-way through the event, four really tall men walked over towards me, while I was standing on the side lines, refereeing a basketball tournament. One of them looked familiar, but I could not place where I might know him from. They were all good looking and very muscular. Two of them were carrying duffle bags and the other two looked like the ring leaders. One of the leaders, asked, “Excuse me, are you Ms. Fuller?”
“Yes, that’s me. Can you give me a second?” I responded.
I motioned for one of the teachers to take my place and gave him a whistle so he could be the referee. He looked terrified because our students could be seriously competitive and were not opposed to glaring or saying choice words to the ref. They did not do it directly to me, but there was mumblings. He on the other hand, might get choice words, but I would be on the lookout for that. I patted him on the shoulder and said, “Call them like you see them.”
He looked at me with the “yeah, right” look as I walked over to the tall gentlemen, “Sorry, how can I help you guys?”
“We are from the Brooklyn Nets basketball team and heard there was an event today, which we thought we should participate in.”
&nb
sp; Shut the front door!
“W-What?” I stammered.
Out of my peripheral vision, I saw someone else approaching. Who else, none other than Mr. Aroma himself walks up the guys to give them handshakes and pounds “Hey, thanks guys for coming. This will mean the world to them.”
They thank him for his continued support and providing them with this opportunity.
Shut the front door!
With my mouth wide open, I stare at this interaction and no sooner than I can say anything, one of my students noticed one of the players, pointed and yelled, “That’s #43 from the Nets.”
The next thing I know, all of the students and adults abandoned their post and ran over to them. I think one of my girls tackled the shorter one.
Good Lord.
Those players signed autographs, handed out Brooklyn Nets t-shirts, community members came out and then a local news station van drove up. I was so busy trying to organize my crew, so they didn’t trample the players, I didn’t realize that we were being filmed until strong arms pulled me back, while I was prying one of the girls from around the players legs. I turned around and Mr. Aroma was introducing me to the local news anchor. Then he whispered in my ear, “They want an interview, you should do it. It’s more publicity for the school.”
I looked at him, then turned to Janice, “Be sure to pry Tina’s limbs from the players’ legs, please.”
The anchor and video guy laughed out loud, while Mr. Aroma smirked. I turned to them, shook their hands as they asked me questions about today, GRIT, the players and what I foresaw for the future of the school. Thoughtfully answering each question, I apparently become more animated with my hands as I do when I am passionate about something. They completely fed off my enthusiasm and actually stayed awhile. I even tried to get them to play some of the games since I convinced the players to participate, which was the only way to get everyone else to play and win the prizes.
As I stood and watched our hard work play out, plus the added bonus of the players and possible news story, I felt a presence come behind me. His aroma filled the air, before I could even see him. He managed to keep his distance during the festivities, but now with everything back to order, I guess he figured he was taking his chance. Xavier wrapped his long arms around my center, pulling my body into his. Lips touched my ear, when he breathed, “Baby, I miss you.”
Oh my goodness.
There goes that feeling again. How come I can be so mad at him and then he says something so simple and I turn to mush.
URG.
Why was I mad? Oh, he left me in my office as some sort of punishment and did not come back, when I told him to. With a renewed anger, I attempted to unwrap his arms from around me, but he held on tighter.
“Xavier, while I appreciate what you did for the kids, this is not cool.”
He replied, “I did it for you.”
“Okay, while I appreciate that, but this still isn’t cool. Thank you, but I didn’t ask for this and I don’t want you to use this as some ploy to get back together or hold over my head to make me feel guilty. Because that is not going to happen. I meant what I said.”
“This wasn’t a ploy to get back together. You don’t seem to get it yet, but you will. We are together.”
“Xavier, I do not want to argue out here. It’s such a good day and part of that is thanks to you, but we are done. We are free to do what we want, so I suggest you do that because I have.”
His whole body got tight.
“You have what?”
“I told you that I was with someone.”
His hold on me got tighter and I swear I felt him growl. It was a low growl that erupted from his diaphragm.
“Xena, I told you about taunting me, I will not…”
I cut him off and calmly said, “Xavier, I’m not taunting you. I’m serious.”
“The fuck you are,” he raised his voice.
“Xavier, stop this now. I’m at work and I will not have you out here embarrassing me,” I hissed.
He turned me around so I was facing him, but kept his hands on my hips.
“Xena, you are testing my fuckin’ limits. You know I want you, you know you want me. We’ve been playing a very dangerous game of cat and mouse. But the problem is that the cat in this scenario is a fuckin’ lion that has been unleashed. You belong to me and no one else. Why don’t you just accept that? Why do you continually fight against us? I fuckin’ want you so bad and you keep trying to stop this.” He sneered.
“Testing your limits? You got a lot of fucking nerve. You walked out on me, after you led me on. I thought you might have been the real thing, but clearly not.”
I stood on my tip toes to get in his face, “You left me wanting and needing you. Then you walked out like you didn’t have a care in the world, right after I warned you not to do it.”
I stayed in his face, but this time my animated hands were up in the air as well. I continued, “And then you got the fuckin’ nerve to tell me I’m playing a game and I belong to you. Well, fuck you. I’m a grown ass fuckin’ woman and I belong to no one.” I motioned up and down my body.
“You might be able to ignite a fire, but I rely on me and nobody else. I had to find someone else to take care of that ache.” I finish my rant, took a step back and turned my back to him.
“I hurt you” was his only reply.
“What?” I stayed turned around.
He repeated, “I hurt you.”
“No, you didn’t hurt me. You fuckin’ left.”
“I hurt you,” he said more as a realization than a question.
“Fuck off, Xavier,” was my response.
He wrapped his arms around me again and whispered in my ear, “Baby girl, I had no intention of hurting you. I wanted to teach you a lesson from the stunt you pulled the night before, by doing what you did to me. But I wasn’t trying to hurt you.”
“Whatever Xavier, the thing about dossiers is that you never really get to know the person, you may know facts, but they don’t tell you what makes people tick, their triggers or anything like that. So Mr. Wealthy, keep ordering your dossiers and obtaining facts about people, but never getting to know them and see how far that gets you.”
I knew I was hitting below the belt because he did in fact hurt me, and being rejected was surely a trigger for me, especially by a man. I did not know it would have this sort of reaction, but once that flame was ignited, I went about trying to hurt him back. Like denying myself, ignoring him, avoiding him, deliberately hurting him with my words, throwing another man in his face, etc. Man, I had some growing up to do. I probably should check in with my life coach, soon. But today would not be that day. He was just like all the other men. Fuck him. He would leave soon, anyway.
He sighed in my ear, “Let me make it up to you. I see this wound is deeper than I anticipated.”
“Fuck you, Xavier, and move on.”
He nipped my ear, “Baby girl, give me a chance to make this right.”
I did not respond.
“Be Daddy’s good girl and let me make it right.”
Oh God.
My sex pulsed at his words. Fucking asshole. Why did his possession turn me on like this?
I slowly sagged into him and he exhaled on my neck. Then he sighed, “Fuck, I missed my baby.”
11 to his knees
The event finally ended around 2:30 PM, which was good because everyone looked excited, elated, and exhausted, including the players. Xavier and I thanked them for coming, as I held on to Tina who cried when the players left. We are seriously going to have to keep eyes on that girl. After all the kids went home, the staff took everything back to the school, which was one block away. Xavier made the decision to walk me back, but with my hand in his. Granted, I am a grown woman and this is my school, but I was not all that excited about my staff knowing I had a significant other or anything about my personal life. He was being extra attentive, I guess trying to make it right and stake his claim. The truth is, I did not know
what he could do to make it right. I am not sure it could be right. He seems to be stuck on possession and punishment. Yet, we still haven't had that conversation. Were we exclusive? I need to set up an appointment with my therapist as well. This past year, I was very slack and did not keep my regular sessions.
Once we arrived at my office, I excused myself to go to the restroom. I thought I heard my phone chime, but it might have been his because he had an iPhone as well. In an attempt to clean myself quickly, as I was anxious to see what the crazy man had in mind with bringing NBA players to my school. Talk about making up. WOW! After I turned off the water from washing my face and hands, I overheard Xavier talking. It was not clear what he was saying, but he did not sound happy. When I emerged from the bathroom, he was holding my bag out for me to take.
“You are going home with me tonight.”
“Xavier, I don’t…”
He cut me off, “Xena, you are with me tonight.”
I am not sure if he thought this command/demand crap was going to work with me, but I just got finished telling him – I run this.
“Xavier…”
That was all I got out, before he dropped my purse, grabbed and jerked me towards his hard body and kissed me. I mean, he kiss-kissed me. My God. He moved us so I was leaning against my desk while I wrapped all my limbs around him, like Tina did that basketball player. He kept grinding his hard dick into my crotch, causing me to ignite. Xavier pulled back, but kept his forehead touching mine. Breathlessly, he murmured against my lips, “You are with me tonight.”
“Yes.”
My goodness.
I left my car at the school, so he could drive me to his house. Well, he told me to leave my car at the school and ride with him. I was no longer arguing with him about these things because my body was still on fire from that kiss. He did not say anything in the car ride to his place, so I stared out the window, trying to imagine what a billionaire’s house or apartment looked like. He lived in Brooklyn, but on the outskirts, where the apartments were 1.5 million and the neighborhoods were nice. Not like some parts, where the apartments were expensive and the neighborhood was infested with drugs and violence. Hence, gentrification.