by Lynda Chance
So, Josh had to go to the party. And he wanted to go, he really did. Deep down, he knew he wanted to see Hannah, no matter what, no matter where. But she was so perfect, sweet sixteen and squeaky clean. And he was not. He wanted her, no doubt. But he knew that he didn’t deserve her. If only … if she only came from a regular family, it might be doable. Even a family like the Andersons, Josh could probably manage to handle. But Christ, the McIntyres? What the hell was he thinking? She was so far out of his reach it wasn’t even funny. And he was going to make himself sick thinking about it. Could his damn life get any worse?
Josh had the answer to that question some ten minutes later after his uncle had spoken to the sheriff. His uncle stood ready to leave, and when he came to his feet to do the same, the sheriff requested a moment of Josh’s time. His uncle paused and gave the sheriff a thoughtful look. “Mind me asking what for?”
“Not at all. Josh is in no trouble, nothing like that. My girl Mandy is a senior this year and I’d like to pick his brain for a moment or two.”
Josh and his uncle exchanged pointed looks, and Josh tipped his head just slightly to let his uncle know that it would be okay if he left him alone with the sheriff.
“That’s fine, then. I’ll go check on my brother and be back with y’all in a few minutes.” David Turner gave the sheriff a narrow stare. “Will that be enough time with my nephew?” The words were spoken in a deep Texas drawl, with enough depth to them to let the sheriff know that that was all the time he was going to get with Josh.
“That’s fine.”
Josh’s uncle gave the sheriff one more speaking glance, and then turned and left the office, shutting the door behind him.
Josh looked at the sheriff with a question in his eyes that he couldn’t contain. What the hell was this all about? What the hell had he done now? He’d been so damn careful, he tried to be respectful, constantly tried to shake the image of his father that other people might superimpose on his features when they looked at him. So what the hell could the sheriff want with him? Because he didn’t buy it for a second that this had anything to do with Mandy.
The sheriff wasted no time and got down to it. “Jeff McIntyre visited me a few weeks ago about Jesse Whitaker. He was evasive, but I got from that conversation that you have a problem with Whitaker. Is that true?”
A moment of relief hit Josh that this wasn’t about him, but rather, about Jesse Whitaker. “Yes, sir.”
“Mind if you tell me what Jesse did?”
“Mr. McIntyre didn’t tell you already?”
“Nope. Just said that you were worried about Hannah and that she wasn’t safe around the Whitaker boy.”
“She’s not safe around him,” Josh bit out.
“Does that go for all girls? Is my girl Mandy in danger? Are all the girls in danger?”
A bitter expression passed over Josh’s features. “Yes, sir. I wouldn’t trust my dog with him. He’s a sexual predator and as soon as he can be locked up and put away, I know I’ll feel better.”
The sheriff began nodding his head as if that was the confirmation he was seeking. “That’s what I figured. You at liberty to tell me what happened? And who he hurt?”
“No, I’m not. But you can put two and two together. I shouldn’t even say that much, but you need to know so you’re aware and can be watching him.”
“Thank you, son. That information won’t go any farther, I promise you that. You try to get that girl some help if she needs it. She’s lucky to have family like you. Hopefully, she’ll be strong soon enough to press charges against him. The boy needs to be punished, and the girls around here need to be safe.” The sheriff paused and studied Josh as if he had something else to say but didn’t know how to go on, but then continued in a low, gruff voice. “You had a crappy start to life … a bum deal. But you’ve come out ahead of the game. You’re a good kid, Josh. Your aunt and uncle are good people. You try to remember that it’s not where a person comes from that makes him who he is. A man chooses how he makes his own life, and it’s fairly damn obvious you’ve chosen the right path. You’re a good kid,” the sheriff reiterated.
Josh sat in stunned silence for a few seconds as the sheriff’s words penetrated the fog in his brain. He had a moment of pleasure, satisfaction even, that the sheriff wasn’t putting any blame on him. Relief spread through him and then one thought and one thought only popped into his head and he voiced it before he could stop himself. “Good enough for Hannah McIntyre?”
The sheriff looked surprised for a moment and then let out a bark of mild amusement. “What are you asking me, son?”
“Are you going to arrest me if you see me with her?”
“Why would I do that? You planning on hurting her in some way?”
“Never.”
Sheriff Thompson studied him and Josh knew he’d sounded tortured. “Then why would it be my business if Hannah is a friend of yours?”
“Her father won’t like it. None of her family will.”
“You know, son, men can be particular about their baby girls. And I know from raising a teenage daughter, the first boy a girl brings home is the hardest one to swallow. I’m not going to sugarcoat this for you. Jeffrey McIntyre is a harsh man and he loves his daughter. But he’s a fair man. You treat her respectfully, have her home when he tells you to and all that, and I think you’ll be okay.”
“You won’t be looking to throw my butt in jail next to my father?”
“Not if you don’t break the law.” The sheriff looked thoughtfully at Josh and then slowly asked him, “You know what Texas statute says?”
Josh knew exactly what the sheriff was asking. “Yes, sir.”
“Just to make sure we’re on the same page here and you don’t get into trouble. The law says—” The sheriff paused as if not exactly believing he was having this conversation, and took a breath.
Josh decided to have mercy on the older man and inserted quickly, “Seventeen.”
“That’s right. Until then, you keep that in mind, and like I said, you be respectful … nobody will have a problem with a friendship between you and the McIntyre girl. It’s my understanding that she’s sixteen now and Jeff can’t keep her locked up forever, anyway.”
Josh had a moment where if felt as if a vise had let go of his heart. He took a deep breath and stood to his feet. “Thank you, sir.”
“No problem, son. I appreciate your help. I’d also appreciate it if you let me know if anything else comes up with Jesse that I need to know.”
“Will do.” Josh shook the sheriff’s hand, and with a lightness he hadn’t felt in weeks, turned and walked from the office. Evidently, his life didn’t suck as badly as it had twenty minutes ago.
****
On Saturday afternoon after her birthday, Ava warned Hannah to dress up before she came over to spend the night, and Hannah knew something was going down. She had only a vague idea what it could be, and she took care with her hair and make-up.
She’d worn tight, low-rise jeans with a bright pink, lacy camisole and a see-through, short sleeve white blouse over it. She’d left the top few buttons undone, and the pink of her cami peeked over the top of her blouse. She wore wedge sandals on her feet to add a few more inches of height, and she’d straightened her hair and used exaggerated, but not too much, make-up.
Ava had already seen and loved the new car, and now Hannah parked it in the driveway and walked up the path leading to the front door of the Anderson home. Her nerves were jumping wildly, and she kept reminding herself that nothing humiliating was about to happen to her, that she was walking into the home of friends and that everything would be okay.
She slid a hand down her hair, smoothing it down her shoulder, and then knocked on the door. Ava answered it at once, and it wasn’t until Hannah had walked all the way into the center of the room and was surrounded by people that a loud cacophonous ‘Surprise!’ began ringing in her ears.
She looked around and began blushing profusely. She saw Ty, Ethan, and
of course, Ava, immediately. Ava’s parents were standing under the threshold leading to the kitchen and smiling at her, as well. And then Hannah noticed Steven, her math study partner and two other boys from their trig class as well. Kayla was also there, standing close to Ty and she was talking to Katie Turner.
Katie was smiling at her, and Hannah smiled back. Her eyes moved slowly around the room as everyone began shouting and laughing at once. She looked around, but she didn’t see the one person she desperately wanted to see.
And then there he was, coming in from the hallway and staring directly at her with hot, fierce eyes. Hannah’s heart fluttered and her knees went weak, but she was snapped out of it by a laughing Ava, who led her to the dining room to show her a pile of cards, the decorations, and a birthday cake as well as cupcakes.
It was obvious that Ava and her mom had gone to a lot of trouble, and it occurred to Hannah that it didn’t matter how many friends she had, as long as she had a few true friends, then that was all that really mattered.
Her sixteenth birthday party started with a bang, and before too long, music was playing and kids were both mingling and eating cake. It seemed as if everyone took a turn and spoke to her, wishing her a happy birthday and laughing and joking with her. Everyone spoke to her except for one person.
Although he didn’t come speak to her, it seemed as if Josh’s eyes never left her. He hung back against the wall, and talked to Ty, Ethan, or Katie, or whoever happened to come stand next to him.
But the whole time he stood there … he watched Hannah.
It occurred to her that he might expect her to come speak to him first, maybe to thank him for coming, and she was about to do that. Except Steven and his friends came up to her and began joking around with her, and Hannah began to have a lot of fun. Steven’s friends were always so studious in trig class that she’d never really gotten to know them. She had a lot in common with the three of them, as they were taking several of the same accelerated classes. Time passed swiftly as they all stood and talked, and for maybe five seconds, she actually forgot about Josh.
And it was during those five seconds that she glanced up and found Josh standing over her. His hand slid behind her back and he pulled her into his side with an utterly possessive hold. Heat lacerated her insides, and she continued to look up at him, wondering what he was doing, but he still didn’t give her his full attention. Although his arm was wrapped around her like a vise, his gaze was focused on the three boys who surrounded her.
One by one, his attention focused on one guy and then the next and finally the last, until silence descended on the small group and Steven cleared his throat. “Well, happy birthday, Hannah. We have to go, we have to get up early and practice for debate.”
“Oh, okay,” she said softly, silently horrified that Josh had once again treated Steven so abominably. “Thanks for coming. I’ll see y’all Monday.” She moved away from Josh to hug each one of them in turn, and as she did so, she felt an unwavering tension take hold of him until the three guys had left.
Josh’s arm snaked out and wrapped around her again, and he pulled her chin up with one hand and looked down into her face. “Happy birthday,” he said softly.
Hannah gave him her best dirty look as she tried to assimilate the fact that he’d just run off her friends. “I can’t believe you did that,” she whispered under her breath, so no one but he would hear her.
“Did what?” he asked, frowning, even though Hannah was absolutely sure he knew exactly what he’d done.
“I can’t believe that you ignore me for days and days and days and then the very second that a guy tries to speak to me, you barrel over here and act as if I belong to you.”
His fingers tightened on her waist and his brows drew down into a grimace and the pleasant look on his face disappeared completely. He didn’t answer her for several long seconds, and when he did, he drew each word out, enunciating each syllable. “I didn’t run over here the second they started talking to you. I bit my goddamn lip until I tasted blood and waited as long as I could. And you do belong to me.”
His words induced heat within her system, but she’d seen him act this way before, and it hadn’t meant much then, so she wouldn’t let herself get too excited now. “Is this like the dibs thing?”
“The dibs thing?” he repeated.
“Yeah, you know, the dibs thing where you tell your friends that they can’t have me because you’ve already called dibs and then you turn around and tell me that it doesn’t mean anything. Because I have to tell you, Josh, you can’t keep doing that. A year is a long time, and I don’t have many friends to spare, and you keep running them all off!” she finished angrily.
His eyes dropped to her lips. “No, it’s not like the dibs thing.”
She stood under his spell; the feel of his fingers biting into her was exquisite and was sending beguiling need down her spine. “What then?”
Josh lifted his head and looked around. He wanted nothing more than to get Hannah out of here. Mrs. Anderson was cleaning up, and Ava and Ethan had disappeared. Ty and Kayla were sitting on the sofa, and Katie was picking up plates, helping to clean up the mess. It was obvious the party was breaking up.
He made a quick decision and began to implement it. “So, you got a new car?”
He watched her frown at the change of subject. “Yes,” she said simply.
“You want to show it to me?”
“Sure, I guess.”
“We’ll have to run Katie to the house, and then we can take it for a ride, okay?”
“Okay.”
****
Half an hour later, Hannah pulled away from Josh’s house after they dropped Katie off. She stopped at the mailbox that stood like a lonely sentinel on the dirt road. “Where do you want to go?”
“What time do you have to be home?”
“I’m spending the night with Ava, but she and Ethan won’t even notice I’m missing, probably for awhile.”
He gave her a crooked smile. “Okay, good. My truck’s parked there, anyway. Why don’t we drive down to the washout under the bridge across from the Tanner spread?”
Hannah had lived in this county as long as she could remember and she had no idea where he was talking about. She knew she was staring at him as if he was speaking a foreign language, and the thought of driving off into the dark countryside with Josh was both intimidating and exciting. “Um, okay. Which way?”
“You don’t know?”
She shook her head.
“Turn left.”
Hannah turned and carefully accelerated. Josh continued to give her directions and about twenty minutes later, they were pulling underneath an old wooden bridge out in the middle of nowhere. She put the car in park and let it idle. It was pitch black out here and her nerves were seriously rattled. If Josh wasn’t with her, she didn’t even think she’d be able to find her way home. He’d directed her down more farm-to-market roads and dirt roads than she could have possibly memorized before they’d found the place.
“Cut the engine,” he said.
Hannah let out a shaky breath and did as he said. She turned to face him and raised her eyes to his. His hand shot out and he sank his fingers through her hair and held her face up to his. His eyes narrowed and he didn’t waste any time getting back to the subject they’d left hanging when they’d stood talking at the Andersons’ house. “You belong to me, Hannah. No questions, no debate. You understand that?”
A frisson of both excitement and panic shot down Hannah’s spine and landed in the pit of her stomach. Something had changed with him. “I don’t belong to you … because … because you said … you said I had to be seventeen.”
As she noted his set expression, his tense mouth and his jaw fixed in lines of implacability, she nervously wet her dry lips. His eyes dropped to her mouth and his eyes dilated. “I changed my mind.”
****
When Josh dropped his mouth over hers, all he could think about was pushing her into the backseat
with him, not to try something with her that he shouldn’t, but just because it would be so much more comfortable for them.
But that move would be beyond foolish and incredibly dangerous.
So he comforted himself by kissing her. Kissing her the way he’d been dreaming about ever since they’d had that incredible night together when Ty’s parents had been out of town. As he parted her lips and thrust his tongue inside, tasting her the only way that he’d allow himself, he felt a tremor run through her body. He reached up, and pushed his other hand through her hair, and held her face bracketed in his palms. He slanted his head for a better fit, and kissed her like he’d been dreaming of doing. Her hands reached up and wrapped around his wrists, and he was vaguely aware through the buzzing in his brain that she was holding on for dear life.
With only the slight assurance the sheriff had given him, Josh felt a modicum of peace settling into his bloodstream, along with the lust he always felt when Hannah was near. True, he’d have to learn to control his need until she was older, but for right now, satisfaction, hard and intense, swept through him at the realization that she was his. In the back of his mind, he knew at some point her parents would have to know, and he wasn’t looking forward to that conversation in any way, but for now, all he could think about was the fact that no one would ever have Hannah but him. He would have all of her kisses, he would be the guy who took her out and held her clamped to his side; he would be the one who eventually took her virginity.
Oh, yeah, that shit was sweet. Just the knowledge of what his future held with Hannah was enough to keep him going for a long, long time. And for now, he would be the one who protected her and watched out for her; he would be the one who had exclusive rights to everything about her. Maybe it did bother him that he probably didn’t deserve someone as perfect as Hannah. But, he’d have to get over it, because she was his, and he wasn’t going to give her up just because her family was better off than his. And if she found out that he was so fucking crazy about her that he was almost obsessed with it? Well … he’d try to hide that from her. She didn’t need to know what he’d been going through the last few weeks thinking that he couldn’t have her … almost foaming at the mouth in pain and frustration.