by C L Green
God. Do I even want to tell him this?
Does he need to know I’m being a pansy about having no life? After all that these people have done for me, why am I losing it? At least I am alive. Which considering I bought this whole thing on myself by not keeping my mouth shut, is a miracle.
“Jesus Ari, just tell me. I can’t help fix whatever the fuck it is if you don’t tell me,” Luke urges as his eyes search my face looking for clues.
“I’m alone,” I announce as my bottom lip starts trembling and I feel the sting of fresh tears again.
“Huh?” He looks even more confused.
“I know it’s stupid,” I mumble as I look away again and try to wipe the fresh tears away from my face with the back of my hand. “I just had a bit of a blowout thinking about all that I’ve lost and all that’s happened over the past weeks.”
I glance back to his face just in time to see realization hit.
“Shit. We’ve all been waiting for this,” he mumbles as he drags me back to his chest. His hand slides to the back of my head and dig into my hair. He scrunches his fingers softly, massaging the back of my head. It feels good and I sigh.
“Why you had to choose today when neither Jake nor Emma are here beats me,” he continues as his second hard starts rubbing gently at my back.
We’ve all been waiting for this.
Stiffening as I register his words, Luke senses my change and stops rubbing.
I push against his hands to make eye contact with him again. “What did you say?”
He looks confused again. “I said, why you had to choose…”
“Before that. We’ve all been waiting for this. Waiting for what?”
His face softens. “For you to crack baby girl.”
For me to crack? Baby girl?
With gentle fingers, Luke lifts a hand and swipes some more tears from my face. “Don’t think for a second that no one noticed. You freaked out about your safety for a while, and Emma said you cried for a bit when you found out about Tony, but you never really… cracked. You just kept on going and seemed to resign yourself to your new living arrangements without a backward glance. That was always going to come crashing down on you eventually.”
Oh my God. They were expecting this?
Putting a finger to my chin he tips my face up and studies me intently. “What set you off?”
“Something so fucking stupid…” I murmur as I drag my eyes away from his yet again.
“Stop looking away Ari, you’re okay. I’m your friend. Just tell me.”
A fucking good friend.
With a sigh, I look back at him. “My stupid phone. I was thinking about looking at Facebook and…”
“Gotcha,” he says with a nod. “Emma researched this shit already and warned us something would crack you eventually. I just wish she was here right fuckin’ now because I’m not so sure I’m equipped to deal with this shit.”
“You’re doing just fine,” I give him a small smile and wipe my eyes again.
He grins at me as his eyes brighten. “Bet I can do better.”
“What’s that supposed to mean?” I ask giving him a skeptical look as he pushes away from me and stands up, offering me his hand.
“We’re going in!” He chirps as he tugs my hand and leads me towards the house.
“What about plausible deniability?” I ask as I let him tow me along and we approach the back door to the house. “That was Jake on the phone. He told me it was your choice. So…”
‘We’re going in!” I giggle excitedly as he lets go of my hand to fish his keys from his front jeans pocket.
Luke glances back and rolls his eyes at me before he shakes his head, inserts the key and opens the door.
Chapter Eighteen
AAA
“This shit is good,” I mumble before I dip the white plastic teaspoon back into the tub to swirl it around enthusiastically before lifting another mouthful of goodness to my mouth.
Luke’s lips lift in a tiny smirk as he shakes his head for the hundredth time before setting his eyes back on the road.
“Wha…?” I mumble as I jam the spoon in my mouth. “It is.”
We are on the way home and I’m having the time of my life. I’ve kicked my shoes off and have my feet hanging out the passenger side window of Emma’s Maserati. The feel of the hot wind on my toes is amazing. I am now heightening my pleasure sensors to another level by eating.
And it all feels good.
“Fuckin’ glad Emma made us bring her car. Not sure how I would have dealt with you on the back of my bike,” Luke mutters as his mobile phone starts ringing from its cradle on the dashboard. Excited to receive a phone call (who cares that it’s not even my phone), I squeal as my eyes lock on his phone. Looking at the name flashing on the screen, I squeal again.
Jake.
My eyes swing to Luke to see him wincing.
Uh oh.
“Fuck,” he mutters as he reaches to accept the call. Pausing to hesitate before he accepts the call, he slices me with a stern look. “Not a fucking peep. Keep quiet. Listen but don’t say a fuckin’ word. If Jake finds out I gave you pot while he’s not around, he’s gunna lose it.” He quickly checks the road ahead before swinging his stern eyes back to me. “You hearing me?”
I blink innocently at him, grin, nod my head and return my attention to swirling my spoon through the deliciousness in my hand. Luke rolls his eyes and draws a long breath before accepting Jake’s call.
“Why’d you take so fuckin’ long to answer?” Jakes voice booms through the speakers in the car.
“I’m driving,” Luke responds calmly as he turns to skewer me with another warning look. I bat my eyes at him innocently as I lift another spoonful of green and white heaven to my mouth. “We are about thirty minutes out.”
“I was expecting you an hour ago, what the fuck took so long?” Jake booms again.
He sounds pissed.
“It just took a bit longer than first expected,” Luke replies lifting an eyebrow at me as I pop the spoon in my mouth, pulling it out slowly as I savour the flavours on my tongue.
“Mmmmmmmmm” I moan softly as I swallow another piece of heaven.
“What the fuck was that?” Jake growls in a tone that leaves me no doubt that if he wasn’t pissed off before, he is now. Luke flashes me a venomous look and snatches for the phone in the cradle. Realizing what he is about to do, I slap his hand aside as I call out exuberantly, “Hey baby!”
Luke’s hand vibrates midair as he sighs and shakes his head before dropping it back on the steering wheel with a thud. I look up at him confused and see that he is counting silently backwards from ten as he stares at the road. The muscles in his jaw are twitching and I his whole body has stiffened. Even aware that I am the reason he is so unhappy, I cannot help but admire the lines of his jaw and the way his long muscular arms and powerful hands rest against the steering wheel.
Yum.
Musing that I’m higher and far more easily distracted than is normal, I startle when I hear Jake yell, “What. The. Fuck!” Through the speakers.
“Sorry man,” Luke mumbles as he tips his head back briefly to stare at the roof of the car before setting his eyes back on the road.
“You had better not be driving Arianna around stoned Luke Reid or I’m gunna rip your nuts off and shove them down your throat.”
“I’m not fuckin’ stoned Jake. I haven’t touched the shit. I’m not stupid enough to risk driving her around ripped out of my skull.”
“You sure about that? Even if you’re not, why the fuck is she? I might still flatten your arse when you get back anyway. What the fuck happened?”
Luke slashes another venomous look at me and I shrug nonchalantly.
Jake sure is pissed. I, myself, can’t see the problem. So Luke rolled me a doob and I smoked it. It sure did knock the worries right out of my head and make me feel great.
Shoveling another heaped spoonful creamy joy into my mouth, I moan again. Loudly.
>
“Why. The. Fuck. Is she moaning?”
Luke leans across and snatches the tub from hand. I snarl and snap. “Give that back!”
Ignoring me, he leans across further and flings the tub with the tiny white plastic spoon out the window. “She was eating,” Luke enlightens Jake as he rocks back into his seat.
As I stare openmouthed out the window where my tub of deliciousness exited, I growl. “Why’d you do that?”
“Because that shits too fuckin’ weird and you’ve eaten enough of it. You’re gunna make yourself sick,” Luke replies settling his hands back on the wheel looking pleased with himself.
“It was delicious,” I pout and huff as I throw myself back against the car seat. “Jake, Luke’s being mean to me,” I grumble.
“What the fuck were you eating?” Jake asks sounding more curious than pissed.
“Deliciousness,” I reply despondently.
“And what the hell is deliciousness?” Jake asks again, sounding impatient but curious.
“A tub of low fat cottage cheese with a whole jar of fuckin’ hot jalapeno’s dumped in and mixed all together,” Luke butts in. “She’s gunna be shittin’ fire for a week.”
“Jesus Christ,” Jake mutters under his breath as I scowl unhappily at Luke.
“I will not be shitting fire,” I announce haughtily, “I grew up on jalapeno’s, they are very healthy. Packed with Vitamins A and C. They are a thermogenic food and they have anti-inflammatory properties. They keep me skinny and make me feel good.”
“Jesus Christ,” Jake mutters again, the sound rumbling through the speakers of Emma’s car. “You didn’t answer me first question Luke, why did you let her smoke in the first place?”
Luke looks at me and sighs. My eyes widen as I realize he’s about to rat on me. Throwing my hand up I start shaking my head and mouth, “No,” over and again.
“You should have thought of this when you decided not to stay quiet my rat assed little friend,” Luke whispers sadly at me before raising his voice again. “Because she was crying brother.”
I throw Luke a miserable look and let my hand fall to my lap.
Why did he have to tell him that?
The wind leaves my sails and my mood dives to the depths of depression. Like a second tidal wave, feelings of grief flood me and tears prickle at my eyes. I stare out the window next to me, refusing to look at Luke. Traitorous bastard that he is.
How could he?
Sounding concerned, Jake’s voice echoes through the speakers again, “Why was she crying?”
Luke sighs heavily before replying. “My guess. That shit Emma told us about. PTSD.”
“Shit,” Jake murmurs softly.
“Yeah,” Luke replies flatly. “I didn’t know how else to deal with it.”
“I’m hearing you. Just get her home. I’ll talk to her. See you both in half an hour.”
The call disconnects and the soft sounds of Luke’s ITunes start playing over the speakers again. I continue to maintain my stare out the window.
“I’m sorry girl. He needed to know.”
With tears trickling silently down my cheeks I continue to stare out the window as I mumble, “Yeah I know. Embarrassed. Much.”
“Fuck. Don’t be embarrassed I’m a friend. Just promise me you’ll talk to Emma or Jake about whatever it is that’s upsetting you so you can move on. I much prefer happy Ari. Sad Ari scares the living shit outta me.”
Swinging my eyes to face him, he looks sad.
Crap.
This is not his fault. Again, I brought this on myself and he’s been nothing but kind to me. “Sorry,” I mumble again as I mentally scold myself further. Pulling my feet back in the window and settling them on the floor, we continue to drive in silence. I listen to the hum of the engine and the songs playing softly on the car speakers. Zoning out, I slide further down into my seat to relax while I turn my head sideways to watch Luke as he drives.
Even with a sad look on his face, he is still stunningly gorgeous. Most women’s wet dream in fact. With his Chris Hemsworth look going on and those goddamned dimples when he smiles, he’s nothing short of sinful joy. He’s almost a freak of nature he’s that good-looking. Without giving it much thought I ask, “Why don’t you have a girlfriend or wife?”
Luke tenses for a moment and I watch as his brows knit fleetingly before he relaxes to continue driving in silence. Seemingly he does not want to answer that question. Not one to give up so easily, I continue. “You’re a great guy, AAA looks, great personality. Such an amazing package I’m nothing short of mystified you’re not hooked up with some stunning girl.”
I watch as a dimple pops and his eyebrow lifts.
“AAA?”
“Uh huh. AAA,” I announce as I chew at my lip thoughtfully, waiting for him to say something more. In vain. Keeping his eyes on the road, he continues to ignore my question. It is not until a few minutes have passed that I realize he is really not going to answer me.
Okay then.
Bored with the lack of stimulating conversation and hypnotized by the hum of the car engine, I allow the soft sounds of Luke’s music to lull me. My eyelids start drooping. Yawning deeply, I feel myself dropping into the abyss of sleep. As I hover at the edge, my mind slowly whirring to a standstill, I finally hear Luke’s soft whisper. “I think I was waiting for someone just like you.”
Fuck.
*****
I slowly drift back to consciousness at the sound of the car gearing down. The indicator signal clicks an annoying beat in my brain. I realize that my head is leaning on something soft against the passenger side door and that I’ve turned over in my sleep.
Opening my eyes slowly, I yawn and stretch as I curl my neck to inspect the cushion. I smile as I realize it’s Luke’s shirt.
He’s such a good guy.
With alarming speed, my body pings to life at the realization that Luke is now shirtless and sitting right next to me. I battle with myself whether to take a peek. It feels wrong to take advantage and ogle the poor man when he has clearly done a nice thing for me, but really, with looks like that didn’t God put him on this Earth for women to ogle?
I bet he looks just as good without a shirt on as he does with one on.
I hesitate briefly before turning my head. As I do so, a deep, familiar voice rumbles next to me.
“Nice nap?”
Jake?
Confused, I knit my brows and stare at him. I must have fallen asleep, asleep. Wow. I didn’t even wake up when they changed drivers. Which in itself is scary, because why did they change drivers? Jakes lips twitch almost imperceptibly and his eyebrow piercing jiggles. I can see his amusement. “We even had a discussion about whether you were in a dope coma. Luke figured not because you kept scratching your arse.”
Huh?
My eyes widen even further as I stare at him horrified. “What?” I squeal.
I’ve been scratching my butt in my sleep?
“Oh my God,” I whisper as a hot trail of fire burns across my cheeks. Jake’s lip twitch turns to a wicked smirk as his eyes return to the road ahead. Slamming Emma’s car through the gears, we roar along a skinny back road in the middle of nowhere.
As he drives, I marvel that he has managed to jam himself into the driver’s seat of Emma’s tiny car. His huge shoulders are hanging off each side of the seat and he has pushed the seat as far back as it will go on its tracks. He’s also rolled the backrest back to the point where it looks more like he is lying down than sitting up to drive. We drive in silence for a while before Jake’s low, deep, growl rumbles through the air again.
“Not a big fan of finding out you got stoned while in the company of another man. Even less of a fan when I discover that same man driving you around without his shirt on.”
Clearly he is no longer amused.
Woops on the first count and not my fault on the second. “Nothing happened!” I roll my eyes at him and swing my attention to the road as I try to work out where we are going
. An almost impossible task when I’m in a strange town in a strange State. Add to that, the only roads I know around this town are the main ones entering and leaving it and I may as well be lost in space. “Where are we going?”
“My house.”
Cool. But I wonder why? I’ve known for some time that Jake has his own house but so far, he’s never mentioned it. It seems strange that suddenly out of the blue, we are going there. Together.
I muse on this thought for a short while before deciding he is just picking something up before we head back to the shop.
“In his defense, I never saw him without his shirt on.” I inform him as I continue to review my surroundings. From what I can see, we are driving through a state forest.
“Not the point,” Jake mutters under his breath as he slows down to make a right hand turn.
Wrong.
A very good point, considering I didn’t ask him to take it off and didn’t even know he’d taken it off until I woke up. “Why? Were you worried I was going to jump him?”
“Something like that,” he grumbles as he flicks me an annoyed look. His green eyes look dark. His lips are pressed together in a straight line. The fingers of his left hand are clutching the steering wheel a little too tightly.
I reach out and place my hand on his right arm as it rests lightly on the gear stick knob. “I’d never do that to you.”
His eyes soften and he nods. “Yeah.”
Jake’s attention moves back to the road ahead as the car slows even further. Turning left into a gap in the trees, I start to pay attention again and realize that we are now in a driveway. A long gray gravel driveway that winds between the trees and disappears into the bush ahead of us.
As Jake inches Emma’s car slowly along the gravel, I look ahead, keenly interested in what Jake’s house will look like. I am not expecting much. If the shop is anything to go by I expect it to be old and well used. Maybe even in need of a paintjob. The gardens are likely to be a tangled jungle that one could lose a small child in. I grin to myself as I envisage needing to hack my way to the front door with a machete.