“Did you hear a word I said?” Nick demanded testily.
“I heard you,” I informed him blithely. “Half the neighborhood heard you.”
He sighed and sank onto the bed beside me. “You’ve been distant ever since we got back from the hospital,” he said.
“Hard to be distant when I’ve been right here twenty four hours a day, seven days a week,” I snapped.
He stared at me. “Am I missing something? Are you mad at me for something?”
I shut the huge volume with an audible snap. “Why the twenty questions, Nick?”
“You should be resting,” he told me, “and not flipping through gigantic books as thick as a damn brick wall,” he said as he snatched the book away and disrespectfully flung it onto the cushion at the far end of the room.
“I was doing some light reading,” I protested tongue-in-cheek.
His reaction was priceless, I thought as I watched him sputter. He gaped at me as though I had taken leave of my senses, “Light reading? Unless your middle name is Brainiac, that does not constitute light reading. That’s it, no more reading! Get into bed!” he ordered arrogantly.
His tone made me grin, my first smile in many days and he stopped when he saw it, his gaze touching on my lips almost reverently. Obediently, I stretched out onto the coverlet and looked up at him.
He pulled the coverlet up to my chest as gently as though I were a child then picked the remote and placed it beside the bed. He was fussing over me, I realized.
“You need to stay in bed, Oksana. You’ve been under a lot of stress so just take these few days to recoup your strength,” he said. His tone was almost pleading.
Nick never pleaded. He had a natural stamp of arrogance thanks to his alpha personality that made him automatically toss orders about and expect them to be followed to the letter. Now he was practically fussing over me like a mother hen.
He loved me, I realized anew. Every time I realized this, it was like a new gift I had been given. I wanted to make him as riotously happy as I was, I thought. But somehow, my greatest fear was that I wasn’t.
Lena’s parting words shot through my mind and my smile dimmed:Let him go, Oksana. Don’t take him down with you to a childless, unhappy existence. If you love him, set him free.
He was under some serious stress of his own, I realized as I watched him look down at his hands and then sigh. What was bothering him, I wondered. My health? Or the thought that I might never be able to give him kids and he was stuck with me?
Nick would never be so disloyal, my subconscious chided me.
You’re right, I thought silently. But I’m starting to think Lena was right. I can’t very well go through the rest of our life together wondering if he was unhappy and hiding it. It would drive me mad and then I would drive him mad.
I had to end this, I realized, sorrow rending my heart at the thought.
“Nick?” I murmured, sitting up in bed and raising myself to my knees behind him.
He turned to look at me, his green eyes deep pools of indecipherable emotion.
I leaned in immediately and pressed my lips against his. He tasted great, clean and fresh and minty. His lips responded to the caress of mine, opening up to allow my tongue to plunge in for a leisurely exploration. With one move of his hands, he flipped me from my kneeling position to sit atop his lap, my long legs sprawled on the bed.
I came up for air. “Easy, sailor, I’m fleshier than most.”
He grinned at me as he parried huskily, “And my thighs are tougher than they look.”
“Oh they look plenty tough to me,” I assured him as I grabbed his head and pulled it down to mine for another kiss.
His hand immediately delved beneath the thin material of my cotton tee-shirt to caress my breast and I arched unconsciously into his arms.
“I need you. Now,” I gasped, my hand stroking the thick ridge of his penis through the pants he had on. He had come straight from the hospital to check on me so he still had on his work clothes.
“Don’t you need to rest?” he breathed against my ear as he proceeded to do something to my earlobe.
I didn’t respond, just jerked up his shirt and bent my head to this tiny nipple. A hiss of breath escaped him as I began to lick the tiny, sensitive bit of flesh.
“Oksana. You’re very bad,” he groaned as he gave himself up to my caresses.
Wetness dripped through my now-swollen pussy, making me wriggle my ass uncomfortably in my tight jean shorts. I pushed Nick onto his back on the bed and as I followed him down, I unsnapped the button on my shorts, undid the zipper and wriggled out of it all the while laving at his nipple.
“Oh baby,” he moaned, shoving his hand into my hair and urging me on.
My hands began to unzip his pants hurriedly.
“Someone’s in a hurry,” he noted on a husky laugh.
I wriggled my ass, rubbing myself against his freed arousal. He groaned. “You make a good point, baby. I’m in a hurry too.”
I laughed and tossed my tee-shirt over my head. I was completely naked now, except for my bra. As I went to work on it, his gaze feasted on my large breasts, his expression naked and hungry.
I laughed. “What is it with guys and large breasts?”
He shrugged as he started to reach for me, “Probably same thing ladies have for big dicks.”
I slapped his hands away, “You’re overdressed.”
I reached for the buttons of his shirt, my eyes on his and then with a sharp tug of both my hands, I ripped the shirt in two, sending buttons scattering in every direction.
Animal hunger leapt into his eyes and everything in me jumped in response. I wanted tonight to be perfect, I thought. I wanted him!
He cradled my head gently as he pulled me down for another kiss, his hands caressing my breasts, my stomach, my thighs, everywhere. My skin felt as though it was on fire with the sensations he evoked inside of me.
“I love you,” Nick whispered.
I raised my head, my eyes swimming with tears as I looked down at him. I opened my mouth to say the same thing but I couldn’t say it. If I told him I loved him now, it would be the first time I had ever said it aloud and if I did, he would never let me go. He would remain with me forever and be sentenced to the same fate I was.
I shut my eyes, forcing a carefree grin onto my face as I asked, “As much as you love my big tits?”
He laughed huskily. Was that a thread of unhappiness I heard?
I was going crazy; Lena had been right! I had to let him go.
I kissed him deeply, pouring my desperation into the kiss, saying goodbye with my hands and mouth and lips and body.
When I lifted my head, Nick smiled at me uncertainly. “That kiss was different.”
The man was too astute by half.
I grinned, “That’s because I’ve been kissing other pretty boys at work.”
He chuckled, effectively distracted as I had meant for him to be. “You have been an incredibly naughty girl, haven’t you? There’s nothing else for it,I have to punish you,” he said with a put-upon sigh as he rolled, placing me underneath him.
He grabbed his torn shirt and bound my hands together before tying off the other end to the iron headboard. My eyes watched him trustingly. Nick would never hurt me I knew, and even though we had never tried bondage sex, I wasn’t worried. Somehow he seemed to have picked up on my desperation as though subconsciously, he acknowledged that this was goodbye.
His hands stroked down my body as he kissed my collarbone and began to kiss my breasts. He licked them until they beaded into hard points beneath his ministrations then his lips flicked downwards to my navel as he began to lick and blow.
I wriggled, laughing breathlessly beneath him as I fought my bonds. “Stop! Please stop!”
“Ticklish eh?” he asked as he blithely continued to lick and blow.
“Please! Please! Stop!” I pleaded, laughing hysterically.
He did for a minute, his eyes twinkling as his gaze
met mine. “If I do stop this exquisite torture and deprive myself of the fun of watching you squirm, what’s in it for me?”
“My undying gratitude,” I promptly replied, my eyes laughing at him.
He bent his head towards my navel, his intent clear.
“No! Stop! Okay what do you want?” I gasped.
He grinned at me. “We’ll come to that, my sweet.”
All traced of laughter vanished as he bent his head to the juncture of my thighs. His tongue flicked out and tasted me in one torturously slow, leisurely, long flick. My entire body began to quiver.
“You taste amazing,” he told me as he bent his head again.
His lips began to work as he licked me, flicking his tongue repeatedly against my clitoris. His hands held my legs wide apart, giving him unhampered access to the core of my being. I writhed in his arms, holding him close and gasping as I shoved my hands into his thick salt and pepper hair.
Suddenly he pulled away from me. “What are you doing?” I gasped writhing in desperation as I lay suspended in the throes of passion.
He grabbed something out of the bedside drawer and I would have blushed if it hadn’t been for my caramel skin. He was holding my dildo.
He kissed my clitoris again and I forgot my embarrassment as he slowly began to shove the dildo deep into my pussy. I moaned, clutching the sheets tight in both hands as he drove me crazy plunging the rubber into me again and again in rhythmic thrusts while his lips and tongue flicked and licked my clit again and again.
“I’m close,” I gasped, twisting my waist helplessly. “I want you inside me, now! Please!”
He didn’t answer me, just kept thrusting and licking and sucking until he thrust me inexorably over the edge.
I came with great gasping grunts, moaning as I squirted vagina juices onto Nick’s face. He didn’t mind, just kept kissing and licking until I was utterly spent.
He rose from his position to stand above me. He untied the shirt end from the headboard and then he remained standing above me as he motioned for me to kneel.
“Now you know how you can pay me back for stopping the tickles,” he told me, his eyes slumberous with desire.
I knelt before him, my hands still bound together as I began to lick him.
When I made to untie the bounds, he tightened his hand in my hair. “Leave it.”
Obediently, I continued to suck him, my lips and tongue moving up and down his smooth, hard shaft. He threw his head back, enjoying the sensation and pleasure as I loved him with my lips. One of his hands reached down and squeezed my breast hard, drawing a gasp of pain from my lips. He immediately released my breast and stroked my hair apologetically as I continued to suck him.
Wet moisture beaded at his tip and I licked it off again and again, enjoying the slightly salty taste of him.
Nick grunted and then raised me up with one hand to stand on the bed with him.
He turned me to face the wall and then when I had leaned both hands against it, he spread my legs and drove into me from behind, his thrusts sure and fast. He entered me again and again, driving faster and faster and faster into me.
“I love you,” he panted with each thrust.
One of his hands came around me to caress my clitoris as he fucked me and I went a little crazy, bucking and twisting in his arms. His thrusts increased in tempo and soon I was coming again, clenching and unclenching around him as I spilled my juices in pleasure. He made a harsh guttural sound, yelling my name as he too began to cum, spilling his juices deep into my waiting vagina.
Oksana Davies
I drifted slowly back to earth, splayed against the damn wall like some pagan sacrifice.
“Are you alright?” Nick asked as he pulled out of me and helped me down onto the bed. I nodded wordlessly. I had had my moment of fun; my last sex with him. Now I had to let him go.
“Sure I wasn’t too rough with you?” he asked, tipping my chin up and placing a gentle kiss onto my lips.
“No. It was…” my voice trailed off. I couldn’t describe our lovemaking, I realized. There really were no words.
Nick chuckled, the sound a masculine sound of satisfaction and triumph. “My sentiments exactly,” he told me as he bent his head and kissed the tip of my nose.
He rolled off the bed in one fluid motion, heading straight for the bathroom while I remained sprawled atop the bed in delicious lassitude.
He emerged a few minutes later and I dragged myself off to the bathroom, my mind working furiously. How would I make him leave? If I just told him the truth that I thought we needed to break up because I might never be able to give him kids, he would never accept that. I had to find some way to quarrel with him. I had to make him angry and make him believe I was angry too.
I thought furiously of what to do as I rinsed myself and dried off with a towel. I loved him with all my heart, I thought sadly.
Lena’s words flashed through my mind again and I straightened. I would have to end things with him because I loved him. It was the only right thing to do.
I came into the bedroom just as he was finishing a call and I looked up to see him already shoving his arms into his shirt. His pants and shoes were already on too.
“Something came up at the hospital?” I asked, stalling for time. If he had to work perhaps we break up later, I thought desperately.
He hesitated then he admitted quietly, “It’s um, Gina actually.”
He was watching me intently as though I were a cat on steroids or something. “She’s had some car trouble in a deserted area and she needs my help.”
I nodded, silently thanking the fates even as my heart began to bleed inside me. This was my chance then. “I see.”
“She’s just a friend, Oksana,” Nick said quietly, standing there deliciously disheveled in his button-less shirt with his hair sticking out in every direction.
“Yeah she is Nick. So am I. Now unless you want your friend to know exactly what you’ve been up to, I suggest you do something about that hair and that shirt.”
He sighed as he came towards me, “What’s this? I thought we were past all this? Gina was my girlfriend a million years ago. There’s nothing there now. Please. She’s just another human being in need of help.”
“I’m sure she is. Go on, Nick. Go be her knight in shining armor. I need to get some sleep,” I muttered as I returned to the bed.
He followed me as I began to straighten the bed. “What the hell is this, Oksana?”
He was angry now. Good.
“We just made love” he began.
“Exactly,” I cut in.
“So why are you giving me that wounded dog look as though you think I am cheating on you. You should know me better than that!”
“I do know you better than that,” I spat. “What I find interesting is the realization that even if you were cheating I wouldn’t care!” I lied.
He froze, his shocked gaze flying to my face.
“What?”
“You heard me!” I snapped.
“No. No, Oksana. I know you; you don’t mean that,” he said shaking his head as though denying the evidence of his own ears.
“It’s true, Nick. Why do you think I have never been able to say I love you?” I asked, thrusting the knife deeper and hitting a vulnerable spot.
He blanched.
“Haven’t you ever wondered why I couldn’t get myself to say it despite how many times you shouted it in my ear?”
He stared at me silently.
“That’s right, because I don’t. Lord knows I have tried and tried and tried, but it’s just not coming,” I said, my heart breaking into a million pieces with every cruel word I flung at him.
His eyes were fastened on my face in horrified fascination and heart-wrenching disbelief as he silently begged me with his eyes to tell him this was one horrible joke.
“I think I had better leave” he began.
“Please do.”
“and come back later,” he finished.
�
��Don’t bother,” I said.
He paused to look at me. “What the hell is going on? You sound like some puppet with someone’s hands up your ass. Who’s pulling your strings? Grandmama?”
He was too astute by half.
I glared, my voice shaking at the memory of exactly how she had pulled my strings. “Get out of my house and stay out. Don’t ever come here again.”
Nick crossed to the other side of the bed where I was, his hands reaching for me. I quickly stepped backwards out of reach because I knew that if he so much as laid one hand on me right now, I would dissolve into his arms in tears and confess all.
Her Designer Baby: (Loving Over 40 Book 1) Page 52