by Helen Scott
Slowly, her sense of self started to emerge like the sun after a storm. Right now it was just one ray of light peeking through the clouds, but she knew with the right encouragement, the clouds could thin and the sun could shine through once again.
Wrapping a big fluffy towel around herself after the shower, she quickly dried off. Robin began to pull on the shorts and the T-shirt without dropping the towel, only to stop when she remembered where she was.
Dressing without ever allowing herself to be completely naked was something she always felt she had to do at Eclipse, since she never knew when the cameras had moved or new ones were installed. The only time she’d been completely naked was when Randall wanted to play dress-up as if she was his personal doll. It had been about eight years since she’d looked at herself without any clothes on. Cautiously, she let the towel drop and set the clothes on the counter.
She was skinnier than she’d ever been, but that was the strict diet she’d been kept on. Her breasts were still disappointingly small, but her hips flared nicely. She looked somewhat womanly. Turning, she examined her butt and legs. Nothing had drastically changed there. Her bum may have been a bit more rounded prior to her employment with Eclipse and Randall Fields, but she had also been a teenager when she’d started, and it was almost ten years later.
Anger, followed swiftly by despair, flooded her at the thought of all the time she’d lost. Who would hire someone who couldn’t give them any previous work history? Hell, she couldn’t even use her real name. If she wanted to live out in the world and not lock herself away, Robin would have to become someone else. It wasn’t hard; she could do that kind of stuff in her sleep. What bothered her was more the idea of it, giving her identity up so she could live.
The thought of dating skittered across her brain, and she wanted to shut down that line of thinking, but it was already there, laid out in front of her. If she ever wanted to build a relationship with someone, it was going to be based on lies from the very beginning. Her stomach soured at the thought.
Enough.
She pulled on the shorts and the T-shirt. They were skin tight. She hadn’t thought Aster was that much smaller than her, but maybe she’d been wrong. The clothes left her feeling just as exposed as the dress had. Crossing her arms over her chest to shield her sensitive breasts, she went back out into the main bedroom.
Finally, she realized what had been bothering her about the house since they’d first approached it. Everything reminded her of Randall. The navy walls in the bedroom were the same color as his favorite suit. The pictures on the wall were similar to the ones that dotted the penthouse. Then there was the rest of the house, all the antiques and old-school furniture. It all reeked of Randall Fields. At least the stuff here was genuine, unlike his.
Settling under the covers, Robin tried to close her eyes and rest. She hadn’t lied to Hal when she’d said she was tired, but it was more that she wanted to get away from the questions Aster was posing. She just wanted to go twenty-four hours without thinking about Randall Fields. Honestly, she wasn’t sure it was possible, but she was going to try, and the first step was not being interrogated about her time at Eclipse.
It felt as if he was all around her. His navy suit pressing in against her, trapping her against her desk as he had done so many times when he would kiss or fondle her. She knew he would have taken it further if she had stayed. It wouldn’t have been her choice, either. Eventually, he would have lost patience and used her body for his own pleasure. That thought made her want to vomit. The whole room made her want to vomit.
Throwing the covers off, she got out of bed and padded over to the bookcase on the far wall. There weren’t as many books here as in the other room, but surely there was something she could read to distract herself.
Her eyes scanned shelf after shelf of books. Most of them were in languages she didn’t know, or about technical subjects she didn’t even have a basic understanding of. Robin could see why these were the books that had been left behind. The thin copy of The Strange Case of Dr. Jekyll & Mr. Hyde caught her eye, but even the thought of that reminded her of Randall at the gala tonight. In some ways, he was similar to Jekyll and Hyde; one side was charming and suave, the other monstrous and self-serving.
The only other book she would even consider picking up was Frankenstein. Someone loved their classic monsters. As she pulled the book out, the cover revealed the monster’s face, and the memory she had from reading the story the first time was sympathy for the monster and the incredible loneliness it felt. She shoved the book back into its place on the shelf, frustrated by the loneliness she felt within herself. All the years she’d worked at Eclipse, she’d managed to keep it at bay, and now that she was free, the feeling overwhelmed her.
She paced back and forth in the room.
Everywhere she looked, she felt as if Randall was watching somehow. Everything pricked at her memories, highlighting things she’d refused to think about, since it would just cause her pain. Now those thoughts were asserting themselves and making up for lost time.
She sighed.
Either she wasn’t going to sleep tonight or she could ask Hal to take her to a hotel or something. Somewhere that wouldn’t drive her crazy.
The exhaustion pulling at her demanded that she get some sleep. The thought of waking Hal up made her cringe, but she needed to rest more than she needed to worry about his sensitivities.
Cracking the door to the bedroom, she peered out. The house was quiet. There were faint noises coming from Aster’s room, but while she appreciated that they had both been through something crazy together, Robin knew Aster wouldn’t be able to help her. She crept down the hall to Hal’s door.
She knocked gently before she could second-guess what she was doing. When there was no response, she knocked a little louder. Eventually she heard the sound of footsteps approaching the door. Her stomach immediately tied itself in knots.
As the door opened, her brain emptied of all thought. In front of her was an expanse of olive skin that wrapped around well-defined muscles. Her eyes drifted lower only to find that he only wore boxer shorts, which were strangely covered in flamingos. Her mouth went dry at the gorgeous example of masculinity in front of her.
“You okay?” Hal’s baritone voice hummed through her.
Her eyes snapped up to his face, blush staining her cheeks. His sun-bleached hair was tangled and framed his face in a way that should be illegal. She had no idea it was so long. When she’d seen him, it had always been up, but now it hung just past his shoulders. His green-blue eyes watched her with a mixture of amusement and concern.
“Everything okay, Robin?”
She cleared her throat. “Uh, yeah.” Wait. That wasn’t right. She’d come to him for a reason. “I mean, no. I can’t sleep. Could you take me to a hotel? Or is there somewhere else I could stay?”
“You can stay with Dem, if you want, but Alec and Ellie are kind of glued to each other at the hip, and not in a quiet way, if you catch what I’m saying, and Thad and Cin are dealing with some stuff right now.”
Suddenly, the idea of being further than fifty feet away from him seemed unbearable. He had been the one who’d saved her, who had given her a chance and promised to protect her. Hal was her safety blanket.
“Will you stay at Dem’s with me?” Her voice was small, and she felt silly for asking, but right now a safety blanket was a good thing to have around.
A smile slowly spread over his face, and for a moment, she thought he was going to make fun of her. When his dimples showed, she thought she might just faint. Lord, this man was handsome.
“Dem and I don’t see eye to eye on a lot of things. If you want to go to a hotel, we can, but that might raise some questions, and if Eclipse has any way of tracking you, then that would be bad.” He sighed and rubbed the back of his neck, looking down.
Robin let her eyes travel over his mane of hair again. He looked as if he should have a surfboard somewhere within reach, or about to hurdle do
wn a snowy mountain on a snowboard. She wanted to touch it, to run her fingers through something that had obviously spent so much time in the sun. She’d almost forgotten what the sun felt like before Randall took her to The Farm.
“If you want, I can take you somewhere only I know about.” His voice was quiet, as if he couldn’t quite believe the words he was saying.
“Does it look like the bedroom I was staying in?”
He raised an eyebrow at her, speculation filling his eyes, before he simply said, “No.”
“Then let’s go there.”
“Okay. Grab your stuff while I get dressed.”
He turned back into the room, and Robin saw a beautifully intricate tattoo that covered his spine. There were all sorts of different symbols. At the center were four crossed tridents, surrounded by traditional Greek patterns. Her eyes skated down to a firm round ass. If she had a fan, she would be using it. Her heart pounded in her chest as she wrenched her eyes away from the globes that were flexing and releasing as he walked. She would love to examine him more closely. The tattoo. She would love to examine the tattoo more closely. He looked over his shoulder at her then. Her blush came back tenfold.
“I don’t really have any stuff to grab,” she muttered.
“You’ll want to put some shoes on, unless you want me to carry you?” He cocked his eyebrow again, and something tightened within her.
“I’ll, uh, I’ll get my shoes.”
“Okay.” He smiled again with those dimples, and completely disarmed her. “Meet me in the kitchen when you’re ready.”
Hal turned away from her then and rounded a corner into what she assumed was a bathroom. She breathed out heavily. If she was going to be spending more time around him, she needed to get herself together. Back in the room, she slipped on the only shoes she had and went downstairs.
“We need to get you some clothes and shoes tomorrow,” Hal said as he glanced up from the note he was writing, his gaze lingering on certain areas of her body. The tightness inside was back again, and this time it brought a warmth with it that she’d only felt a couple times before. Her eyes raked over his body. Clad in sweats and a thin T-shirt, he looked mouthwateringly good. The sweats hung low on his hips, allowing the waistband of the flamingo boxers to peek out as he moved.
“That would be nice.” She smiled, more at the amusement she found in his choice of boxers than the idea of going shoe shopping. The idea of being surrounded by people wasn’t super appealing right now.
Hal nodded. “Come on. We’ll walk slowly so you can manage in those ridiculous shoes.”
“Hey, it’s not as if it was my choice to wear them,” she said, walking beside him as they made their way out of the house and headed in a different direction than the one she had come in from.
His eyes cut sideways to her. “I know. I’m sorry.”
“Don’t you dare pity me. I had good reasons for what I did. In fact, one of those reasons was your life, buddy, so you should be thanking me.”
“I never did, did I?”
“What?”
“Thank you. You did save my life, and for that, I owe you a great debt.”
“You don’t owe me anything. You got me out of hell. That counts.” She took a deep breath. “That counts for more than I can express.” A knot formed in her throat, but she refused to allow herself to cry again.
They walked in silence for a while, the beam of the flashlight swaying back and forth with Hal’s gait. The path was steeper than she’d expected, and her gaze was focused on putting one foot in front of the other. Her shoes were totally going in the trash after this, along with that wretched dress. It was amazing how Robin already felt a difference just being out of the house. There was nothing out here that could remind her of her time at Eclipse.
She glanced up to see where they were heading, but the way was obscured by trees, not to mention how dark it was. The window she could look out of from the office showed the city off at its finest, but that also meant she never saw the stars. There was just too much light pollution. Her eyes crept skyward, just to see if there were any stars in the sky. What she discovered made her gasp. Glittering diamonds of stars punctured the velvet of the sky, and they were everywhere. She felt so small and yet so at peace.
Her foot landed funny just then, and the shoe gave out under her. She landed on a knee, but that only lasted for a moment before she was on her hip on the ground, the sharp rocks of the path digging into her sensitive skin.
Hal was there before she even fully realized what had happened. “You okay?”
“I think so. I must have just stepped funny.”
“I knew I should have just carried you.” He winked, letting her know he was teasing.
“I wouldn’t have let you,” she said with a smile. The way he made her feel at ease was beyond comforting. It soothed something deep within her, a pain that had become so familiar, she’d forgotten it was pain at all. It had been there so long, it had become normal.
“Up we get.” Hal held his hand out and pulled her upright. His touch elicited feelings in her body that hadn’t been there in years. She blushed furiously.
“Thanks.” She dusted herself off and went to take the next step, but her foot went out again, the stabbing pain in her ankle letting her know that the way she’d landed before was not good.
Hal caught her before she hit the ground this time. His arms were thick warm bands around her. “Looks like you’re off walking duty for now.” He smiled. “I can carry you, if you want, or you can hop along, but I have a feeling that will end badly.” He tried to stifle the chuckle at the end, but wasn’t successful.
“If you’ll just lend me an arm to put weight on, I’ll hop.”
“If you want, but it’s another mile or so.” He shrugged.
“What?” Robin had to have misheard him.
“I can just teleport us there, but you seemed to need the fresh air.”
She couldn’t argue with that. The fresh air was amazing; if she could sleep outside right now, she would. “I would like to stay outside. Are you sure you’re up for carrying me a mile?”
“Sweetheart, I carry weights heavier than you to work out. I think I can manage.” His dimples flashed, and warmth spread through her.
“Okay.” Her voice was husky with emotion.
“Up we go.” Hal placed an arm around her back and hooked another under her knees, bringing her up to rest against his chest. She felt awkward and stiff in his arms. “Relax, love, I’m not going to drop you.”
It was when he began walking that she realized how slow they had been going for her. His legs seemed to lengthen underneath him as he stepped out. Calm suffused her body as he fell into a steady rhythm. Robin’s head was so heavy, she didn’t think he’d mind if she rested it on his shoulder for a moment.
His scent tantalized her nostrils. He reminded her of something, but she couldn’t quite remember what. That fuzzy memory combined with the fresh scent of the air that seemed to be embedded in his hair, along with something inherently masculine, invaded her senses, making her want to purr like a cat. Lordy, was she in trouble with this man.
The mile that he’d said they still had to cover to get to wherever it was they were going seemed to fly by. As they came up the last rise, Robin could see a structure in the distance. There were no lights on, but she could tell it was a cabin of some kind. The silhouette of the building was highlighted by the lake that it perched on. Water glittered in the moonlight, making Robin itch to jump into it. She hadn’t gone swimming since she was a kid, and the idea of doing so made her ecstatic.
Her parents never had enough money to take them anywhere, thanks to her dad’s love of gambling. Every time he came home, she could tell whether he’d won or lost by the way his footsteps fell. The fast tapping of a man excited to tell his wife he won was rare, though. Most of the time, it was a shuffle, a drunk shuffle, to be specific. He never wound up drunk when he won, but when he lost, she could smell the alcohol on him
a mile away.
He was the whole reason she was in this mess. He paid off his debts with the life of his banshee daughter. She would never forget the horrified expression on her mother’s face as he told her. It was quickly followed by screaming and crying. She and her younger sister hid in the bedroom closet, waiting for it to be over. It usually only lasted an hour or two, but this time it went all night, until her mother was hoarse from shouting.
Robin pushed the memories aside. They were sullying the beautiful view. As they approached the cabin, she could see exactly how gorgeous it was. The lake and the cabin were set in an alcove just below the top of the hill. Looking out, she could see all the way down to the ocean. Lights glimmered in the distance. She assumed they were the other brothers’ houses, since there were no lights anywhere else.
“Like the view?”
Leaning against Hal as he spoke was an experience. She felt the vibrations of his voice go all the way through her, like leaning against a washing machine or dryer, but there was almost a texture to his voice that seemed to wrap it around her, filling her head with promises of safety.
Sighing, she said, “It’s amazing. Did you find this place yourself?”
“Yeah. Built it by hand too.” He gestured with his head to the cabin.
“No way. The whole thing?”
Hal chuckled. “The whole thing.”
The path sloped upward toward the front door, which was covered by an awning that seemed to be supported by some tree trunks and decorative branches. Her jaw dropped as they got closer. He had built a log cabin. The man was talented. The wooden door had a window at the top and a metal frame toward the edges. Hal dipped her down as he reached for the door handle.
When it swung open, the scent of him overwhelmed her, rushing out from inside the house. She knew this must be where he spent most of his time. He sidestepped them through the door into the main room and flicked a light switch.
A warm glow spread throughout the space, and as her eyes adjusted, she couldn’t believe what she was seeing. When he said he’d built it, she thought the inside would be basic, overly simple and rough. This was anything but that. The living area was cozy, with a couch and an oversized armchair. A small dining table with chairs off to the other side was covered in papers and a laptop. Behind that was the most beautiful kitchen, other than the one at the house at the bottom of the hill.