Though there was plenty of cabinet and counter space, I didn’t have anything with which to fill the drawers and cupboards. The china had only taken up half of one cupboard. Worried about the cost of getting the minimal necessities—on top of all the other expenses I’d have in the future—despair threatened my earlier feeling of peace.
My gaze went to the little backyard—my own backyard—and my thoughts brightened.
What does it matter what I have? As long as I’m safe and have my freedom, it doesn’t matter what things I have.
As my innate optimism cleansed away my despair, a knock sounded at the door. Terrified Trevor had tracked me down, I froze. Frantically glancing around for a place to hide, I realized how vulnerable I was in this house, away from so many other people.
“Kate? Are you okay?”
Relief surged through me as I recognized Mary’s voice. I hurried to the door and pulled it open, then stood there a moment, shocked to see what she had brought.
Chapter Three
Two pickup trucks filled with furniture were parked in the driveway. My eyes met Mary’s. “What is this?”
She grinned. “When Edward and I saw you didn’t have a stick of furniture, we knew just what to do. You see, our church has been collecting furniture and household goods to donate to charity. But we all agree that you could use it the most.” She glanced at the trucks before looking back at me. “I hope you don’t mind, dear.”
Trying to control the tears that pushed into my eyes, I shook my head. “I don’t mind at all.”
“Good. Then let these nice men get to work and move you in.”
I stepped onto the porch with Mary by my side as the men began carrying in all the furniture, towels, sheets, and dishes I could have wished for. It didn’t take long for them to finish, and I could only smile in gratitude. If I’d opened my mouth to thank them I would have burst into tears.
When the men had left and only Mary remained, I hugged the old woman. “You must be the kindest person I’ve ever met.”
“Thank you, dear,” Mary said, as I released her. “It was worth it just to see the expression on your face.” She chuckled. “To say you were surprised would be an understatement.”
I laughed. “At first when I heard the knock on the door I thought it was . . .” I stopped abruptly, realizing I had almost given away my secret.
“Thought it was what, dear?”
“Thought it was a sales person.”
“Oh, I wouldn’t worry too much about that. Most sales people don’t want to bother coming out here.”
Glad she’d believed me, I quickly said, “That’s one benefit of living in the country, I guess.”
“One of many. You’ll find it’s very quiet at night. Only the sound of the crickets to keep you company. I hope you don’t mind the solitude.”
“Not at all. I actually grew up in a small town, so this isn’t all that different.”
“Good. Well you have a nice day, Kate. And give me a call if you need anything.”
After assuring her that I would, I waved good bye, then went back into my house to see what the men had brought.
There was a couch, end table, and coffee table in the living room, a small table with chairs in the dining room, and a bed and dresser in my bedroom. Fresh sheets and towels were stacked on the dresser and a blanket was folded neatly on the bed.
Overwhelmed with gratitude, I had never felt so loved before. Any lingering doubt about my choice to leave Trevor had been completely erased.
Inspecting my kitchen, I found several boxes that held dishes and other kitchen items. However, there were still a few things I would need to buy to make my kitchen functional, but nowhere near as much as I’d needed before the surprise delivery. I also needed to make a big trip to the grocery store to stock up on staples, like flour, sugar, and the like. But first I would open an account at the bank and deposit the money I’d brought with me.
The eighty-five thousand dollars was all I had left from my father’s life insurance policy and it was vital to my survival. I didn’t feel comfortable having that kind of cash lying around the house, unprotected. That money would pay for my education and I would need every penny to see me through the next few years it would take to complete my degree.
I also realized I would most likely have to sell Dad’s house sooner than I had planned. But before making that decision, I would rely on the cash on hand.
Though I planned on getting a job, I was realistic enough to know that once the baby was born, working and going to school would be extremely difficult. I had to conserve my funds now in order to ensure I could survive once the baby came.
As I thought about the most recent semester and how close I had come to finishing it, my anger at Trevor rekindled. When I’d become pregnant and had tried to leave, he had found me and brought me home, then locked me in our apartment and not allowed me to finish the semester. There had only been two weeks left, but his fear that I would run had given him the excuse he needed to prevent me from going anywhere or seeing anyone.
When I had convinced him I was happy with him and would never leave, he had left me on my own and I had called the police with a tip that he was involved in the recent car thefts that had been occurring in the area. The next thing I knew, he had been arrested and I had taken advantage of the opportunity and run.
Now I was here in this small town in the Central Valley of California, relishing my freedom, yet wary of anyone knowing the truth about my past.
Besides the fear of Trevor finding me, I felt ashamed—ashamed that I had been so easily fooled. Trevor must have seen me as an easy mark. Maybe he did love me, but he had also stolen the money my father had left me. My face heated in embarrassment at my stupidity—for trusting him, for falling for him, for believing he loved me.
Pushing aside the mistakes from the past, I picked up my purse and went out to my car. After stopping by the bank and opening an account, I drove to the bakery. The Help Wanted sign was still there and since things were going so well today, I had high hopes I would be able to get this job. My hopes were quickly dashed, however, when the owner of the bakery told me she wanted someone with more experience.
“But I learn quickly and I’m a hard worker,” I said.
“I’m sorry, but I just don’t think you’re right for the job.”
Embarrassed to have the few customers in the store watch my rejection, I left the bakery and walked back to my car.
Chapter Four
Though feeling dejected, I decided to go to the grocery store. I ended up driving to the next town over, since my town was too small to have anything more than mom and pop stores and I wanted the selection and pricing of the large stores.
As I walked up and down the aisles, I thought about Mary and how she and her husband believed I had been widowed. While I felt bad about misleading them, I knew it was best for people to know as little as possible about my situation. The less they knew, the less likely someone would say something that would lead Trevor to me. The thought of Trevor tracking me down terrified me. I knew he must believe I’d betrayed him when I didn’t come to the jail and bail him out. He had trusted me to bring the gym bag full of my money to the jail. He’d had no one else to turn to and I had let him down. At least I was sure that would be how he would see it.
Then I remembered what he’d said the last time he had threatened me about running away. I pictured the cold look in his eyes as he’d warned me, If I have to track you down again there are going to be some serious consequences. I didn’t know what those ‘consequences’ would be, but if they were more serious than keeping me prisoner in my own home, I didn’t want to know what he’d been thinking.
As different scenarios flashed through my mind, any sense of security I’d been feeling fled and I had a strong urge to run. My gaze darted wildly from one shopper to the next, but they were oblivious to me, busy choosing items from the shelves and placing them in their carts. No one paid attention to me and I took sever
al deep breaths as I tried to calm myself.
He has no idea where you are.
I reached for a can of soup, my hand shaking.
For all you know, he’s in jail and will be there for a long time. He’ll eventually lose interest in you and you’ll be home free.
I tried to believe those ideas, but deep down I knew he would never stop looking for me. Hopelessness cascaded over me and it felt like someone had placed a heavy jacket around my shoulders. A jacket that weighed me down and made it difficult to move forward.
I’d always been an optimistic person, but the thoughts I was having were difficult to overcome. By strength of will, I kept walking down the aisle, studiously following my list and filling my cart with what I needed. I was grateful I had the list—I was having trouble thinking clearly and felt certain I wouldn’t have a clue what to buy if it wasn’t written down.
Finally finished checking off all the items on my list, I trudged to the checkout line and purchased my groceries. After loading the bags into my car, I pulled out of my parking space and drove toward the exit.
Activity on a grassy area near the exit caught my eye. A group of people were surrounding something. I watched as a man bent down, then stood back up, a puppy in his hands. I drove my car toward the group, parking in a space nearby. I watched the activity for a few minutes, seeing the happy faces of the people playing with the puppies. A gap in the group opened up and I counted three puppies. They looked like German Shepherd puppies.
I’d always heard German Shepherds made excellent watch dogs. I imagined Trevor knocking down my front door and my dog protecting me. I opened my car door and was walking toward the puppies before I had completed visualizing the possible incident with Trevor.
I watched the other people as they played with the puppies. “How are they with children?” I asked the owner.
He looked at me and smiled, a puppy in his arms. “How old is the kid?”
“A baby,” I said, not wanting to elaborate.
“Well, it’s always a good idea to not leave babies alone with any dog, but German Shepherds are good with kids.”
He held out the puppy for me to take. I gently held the puppy and asked how old it was.
“She’s eight weeks.”
Her warm body felt substantial in my arms and I felt more secure just having her against me. “How much?”
“Two hundred.”
I tried not to flinch at the price. I knew that even though some puppies were free, others could be pricey. I held her away from me and gazed at her sweet face. When her eyes met mine, she seemed to be telling me that she would protect me. Even though I hadn’t owned a pet before, I was certain I could learn whatever I needed to know. She would be my family now.
“I’d like to buy this one,” I said, setting the puppy back in the enclosure.
As I pulled out my checkbook, the man said, “Sorry, but I only take cash.”
“Oh sure. Okay.” I tucked my checkbook away. “Can you hold on to her for me while I run to the bank?”
“No problem. What’s your name?”
“Li . . . uh, Kate.” My face began to redden as I caught myself almost using my real name.
“I can hold her for an hour.”
I smiled, covering my near mistake. “Great. I’ll be back in a few minutes.”
I strode to my car, then drove to the bank and withdrew the needed money before driving back and buying my new puppy.
“What are you going to call her?” the man asked.
“Hmm. I’m not sure.” I looked at the puppy’s face again. “Well, since you’re a German Shepherd, how about Greta?” I waited a moment, hoping the dog would bark or give some other indication that I had chosen the right name, but she just looked at me. But it almost seemed like she was smiling. “Yes, I’ll call you Greta.”
“Well, you enjoy her. I know you’ll be happy with her.”
I held Greta against me and smiled at the man. “Thanks.”
As I walked back to my car, I held Greta close. “We’ll need to get you some supplies.” I’d noticed a pet supply store as I was driving to the grocery store and decided to go there.
A short time later, after I’d gotten everything I needed for my new puppy, I managed to fit the additional items in my car despite it being full of groceries.
“Whew!” I said, looking at Greta as she sat on the floor in front of the passenger seat. “That’s a lot of stuff.”
She barked in response and I felt like we were becoming friends.
I drove back to my new home and brought Greta inside, then took several trips to unload everything else. After setting the last bag of groceries on the kitchen counter, I noticed a small puddle on the kitchen floor.
“Oh no.” I dug through the grocery bags and found the paper towels, then quickly cleaned up the mess. When that was done, I pulled out the book on German Shepherds that I’d bought at the pet supply store. Then, opening the door to the backyard, I called to Greta to come with me. She scampered after me and onto the grass. I watched her explore the large backyard as I sat on the steps of the back porch, flipping through the book. After a moment I found the section on house training.
Over the next several hours I worked with Greta on teaching her to go to the bathroom outside. I hadn’t realized how exhausting this was going to be, but I knew the hard work would pay off eventually.
That afternoon as I walked her outside, it occurred to me that Mary and Edward might not approve of me having a dog in their house. I decided to call them and hope for the best. I pulled out my cell phone and called Mary. After a brief conversation I hung up, relieved that Mary had not only approved of the dog, but thought it was a good idea since I was living here by myself.
I smiled at Greta as she jumped up on me, begging for attention. “I think we need to send you to obedience school.” I scratched her head, which made her tail wag in apparent happiness. I picked up the ball I’d bought and tossed it across the yard. Greta shot out after it, then trotted back, the ball in her mouth. We did this until I was ready to take a break.
Sitting down on the porch steps again, I watched Greta drink out of her water bowl, then smiled as she flopped down in the shade. It felt good to have a companion and it felt even better to be able to forget about my problems for a while. But even as the thought entered my head, I couldn’t help but catalogue my problems: Trevor becoming abusive, Trevor being arrested for stealing cars, Trevor locking me up, Trevor stealing from me and then me having to run and hide from Trevor.
Wow. Each and every problem involves Trevor. Less than a year ago I didn’t know he existed, and now he’s the root of all my problems. What am I going to do? I can’t hide from him forever.
I thought about my mild panic attack at the grocery store and knew I had to do all within my power to make sure I could protect myself. I looked at Greta and smiled, knowing she was a good first defense.
“I need to get you trained as soon as you’re ready,” I said to her, which made her jump up and come to my side.
Otherwise she won’t be able to do much to protect me.
I scratched her head.
What if she can’t protect me? Then what will I do?
I pondered this for a few minutes, then realized I could learn some self-defense. My pregnancy wasn’t starting to show yet, so I was still in good physical shape to take a self-defense course.
I wanted to go online to look up information on dog training and self-defense, but I didn’t have Internet access yet, and the cell phone I’d gotten didn’t have data.
First things first.
I pulled out my cell phone and called information, asking them to connect me to the cable company for my area. A few minutes later I’d made an appointment to have someone come out the next day and connect a cable modem as well as cable television.
Chapter Five
That night, my first in my new house, I listened to every creak and groan the house made as I tried to go to sleep. I’d made sure all
the doors and windows were locked, and Greta was curled up on her pet bed in a corner of my room, but still I couldn’t help but feel a little nervous that somehow Trevor would find me. After a while, I finally fell asleep.
The next day as I was cleaning up from breakfast, someone knocked on the door. Even though I was expecting the cable company to come, I had to force myself to calm down before walking to the door and looking through the peephole. Relieved to see a stranger in a cable company uniform on the porch, I opened the door.
“Are you Kate Jamison?”
I nodded. “Yes. Please come in.”
“This shouldn’t take too long,” he said as he followed me inside.
I watched him step into the living room and look around. He wasn’t much older than me, maybe in his late twenties.
“Where’s your TV?” he asked as he turned toward me.
“I don’t have one yet.”
He laughed. “People usually have a TV before they have their cable set up.”
My face reddened. “Well, I mostly want the Internet access, but your company had a deal going where I could get free cable for my TV.”
“Oh. Well, that makes sense.”
“Anyway, I’m planning on getting a TV soon. I just haven’t gotten around to it yet.”
“Your boyfriend will probably be glad when you get one.”
“My boyfriend?” Slight panic tickled my neck.
He laughed again. “You do have a boyfriend, don’t you?”
His question made me very uncomfortable. I didn’t want him to know I lived here by myself. I held up my left ring finger and pointed to my wedding ring. “I don’t have a boyfriend, but I do have a husband.”
“Well, just give me a little time to get this all hooked up and I’ll be out of your way.”
“Thanks.”
I heard barking at the back door and let Greta in. She immediately ran to the man and started sniffing him. I pulled her away. “Sorry. She gets a little excited sometimes.”
Lily's Story: The Complete Saga Page 26