"Oh, that would be so cool! It's not like I have anything else to do all summer but hang around with you guys, and I’ll take the belly dancing class if you do," Jillian said, smiling at Sonya.
"I'll mention it to her tonight then. What about you?" she asked, turning to Ryan.
"Yeah, sounds great. Work exchange for all the ice cream I can eat! I'm in!"
When Jillian walked in the back door she heard music playing, and went into the living room. There sat Aunt Jana with a glass of wine in her hand, and Uncle Tim was giving her a foot massage. Tiffany Marie was sitting on her aunt's lap, sleeping as usual. Jillian laughed and took off her sock, plopped next to her aunt and said, "Me next, please! Geesh, I didn't know how exhausting it was to work. But it was fun!" She said taking the glass of wine out of her aunt's hand and throwing back a hefty swig. "Yeecckkk," she said with a sour face, holding her hand in front of her mouth... She got up and went to the kitchen sink and spit it out. "How can you drink that stuff? That's nasty," Jillian said, shaking her head.
She sat back down because she was serious about the foot massage. She picked up Tiffany Marie and held her. "I honestly had a fantastic day. I felt like I was doing something good for Doreen, and it was fun!"
"Yes, you did do an excellent job, and I am extremely proud of you. Oh man, was she was slammed! I sold a lot more of my herbals than I thought I would. Maybe you can help me get some more prepared to take over there? Now, you know that next week she will start staying open later, so people can stop by after work," Aunt Jana said, putting her arm around Jillian.
"Yeah, that is a good idea," Jillian said, "Sonya, Ryan and I took a class from Doreen."
"I saw that. What did you think?"
"It was awesome. I want to keep going. Sonya had a list of about ten other ones. Most of them sounded fascinating, even the belly dancing!" she said laughing.
"I think you’re gonna take that class, right?" Uncle Tim said to Aunt Jana.
"Well, yes, I was thinking about it." She smiled. "But I don't know if I can do it justice. It is an art form."
"You would be terrific! I can just imagine it! "Uncle Tim said as he looked at her lovingly.
"So did you learn anything tonight?" Jana asked Jillian.
"Yeah, most of it all made sense. She talked about what an exciting time this is, and how we can contribute in our own ways to heal ourselves and help others. That we are responsible for all of our actions, how we can fine tune our physical senses so we can quickly tune out the things that don't feel right and tune more into things that do feel good. She talked about the different abilities. Some people are more intuitive, some are more empathic, some have healing gifts. I got the impression that she was saying every single person on earth is connected, and we all have gifts. It just depends on us to learn how to use them effectively," Jillian said, putting her foot on Uncle Tim's knee. He put some oil on his hands and started to work the oil around.
"That's right," her aunt said. "What else?"
"She didn't talk about ghosts and spirits, or demons and hauntings. I wanted to know what she thought about angels and fairies, spirit guides and channeling," Jillian said putting her head on her aunt’s shoulder.
"It was an hour and a half class. She could only fit so much in," her aunt said with a smile.
"I know, but I feel....like I need to know all of this stuff. It's extremely important right now. Maybe it's like the more I learn the more questions I have, the hungrier I get for information. Since I've been here it seems like I have become so much more aware of things." Jillian started thinking about all of the things she had experienced in the last week. The strange dreams, the regression, the healing, Emmy and Elizabeth. Oh yeah, and Amanda. She didn't know if she should say anything, she didn't want to get in trouble. But she did need some answers. Doreen's class made her want more.
Uncle Tim was massaging her foot. In the background, soft Indian flute music was playing. It was so relaxing. After a few minutes, Jillian let her head rest back onto the couch. She felt so at peace and so light as if she had no heavy body to weigh her down. Her consciousness was expanding. It felt infinite, and she was aware of everything around her. Somehow she was such a tiny part of the whole, but she had such a vital role to play in the scheme of the universe.
Why me?
That's what we agreed on.
When?
On the other side, before we came here. You don't remember do you?
No.
I didn't much either at first, but when I was about two and a half, I started remembering.
Remembering what?
How it all works. Well, actually how it all works in terms that we can understand. Even then, most people can't comprehend the complexities and simplicity of it all. It depends on what you believe, compared to what you know. Those beliefs are seeded when you are young, as you are growing up.
So why me?
Okay, we will try this again. There actually is a divine plan for everyone. Some call it fate, or I think free will is a better analogy. Everything you see is made of energy, or a vibration. That includes you and me. Your emotions are an energy that set forth a vibration.
What does that have to do with me?
Everything. Like when you focus on something. You are creating a specific vibration...and since everything is made of vibration, those things that match that vibration will present themselves. It is called entrainment. Like magnets. Even vibrations don't want to be alone, so like magnets they are pulled together. It's that way with your friends, when you are on the same page, or vibration. That feels good. When you are different vibrations, it doesn't feel so good. The greater the difference, the greater the discomfort.
Okay, that makes sense.
It is the same way with the things in your life. What you think about...those types of vibrations will be attracted to you.
Yes, so I have to be careful of what I think.
Oh yes, all the time. If you think, “I am alone,” you are sending out the vibration... I am alone, and so you are.
So why me?
Because we agreed that when you came into this time in your life, you would be given the opportunity to experience things you had chosen before you were born. The possibilities of the challenges might be infinite. It's how you react, or respond to each of the challenges that changes your vibration. And there are some of those challenges people will do over and over and over again. It's not a matter of getting it right, because there is no right or wrong. It’s how you change vibrationally.
So, I thought up all of this in advance? Everyone else did, too? All of the challenges we face? What were we thinking?
There you go; you are on the right track now. So here you are 15 years old. And you are on schedule, in perfect time. We decided that you would have some important opportunities presented to you. Can you tell that they have already started?
Uh, yeah, I think so.
Good. Now just remember that from this moment forward, no matter about the past. It's gone forever, so we only look at the moment you are in. You have a few guidelines you can learn to live by. That will make everything easier.
Seriously?
Yes and no.
Okay, you lost me.
That's pretty easy to do!...What's wrong? Your vibration changed. What are you thinking about?
I am what’s wrong. I feel like I always screw everything up. I just want to belong. I want to feel connected. I feel alone, lost, like Emmy felt without Elizabeth.
Jillian, I promise you that there is never ever any way possible for you not to be connected, totally connected to God and everyone around you. Sometimes you feel feelings that are not yours. How can you do that if you are not connected? Once you begin to allow more, you will feel the connectedness you have.
Try this sometime. When you get up in the morning, go right outside, and walk in the fresh morning dew that is glistening in the grass. Walk in it. Feel it, not just on your skin, but inside of you, too. Then go to a tree and hug it.
Tell it out loud your fears, your worries, your sadness. Feel your words traveling down its roots into the ground, down, buried into the earth. The tree will help you. It doesn’t like that energy around, either! Then tell it what you love, what makes you happy. See your vibrations traveling up the trunk and out onto the limbs and branches, out to the leaves and out into the sky, catching a ride on the breeze and out into the universe.
Jillian, let me ask you a question. If you are gardening, and you want some pea pods, do you plant carrots?
No.
Why not?
Because I will get carrots.
If you want strawberries, do you sit there and look at the dirt?
No.
Why not?
Because I will not get anything.
Good.
So if you want friends, and you know that you are creating everything with your vibrations, which are your emotions, would you say "I want friends,” or “I don't have any friends?"
No, I guess not.
What would you say?
I like having friends.
Very good.
What else do you think you want?
To explore all of this new stuff, my gifts.
Perfect. How do you say it so the vibration matches what you want?
I love learning about my gifts and helping others feel connected?
Yes, now say it as a statement, not a question. That little bit of doubt will sabotage what you are trying to create.
I love using and exploring my gifts to help others!
Bravo!!! How does that feel?
Better... like maybe there is hope. Like it's possible.
That is how you can start to move in the direction of your desires. You don't have to live in default. Speak your intentions; feel your desires. The universe is lining up for you faster than ever before. Always ask for help. Your gifts must be strengthened, and you must use them only for the greater good. Never to take advantage. What you do to someone else, you do to yourself.
Are you Amanda?
Yes.
Hi!
Hello, Jillian. It's so lovely for you to recognize me again.
Are you a ghost?
I am in spirit. Let's just say that we agreed we would get together in this lifetime. And since I left the physical world earlier, I am keeping my promise.
Why did you die?
You will understand later, but I am here with you now to help you experience things so you can grow spiritually. This is the best way to do it!
There is so much I want to learn! Oh yes, and your journal...I want to know more. How is all of this happening?
Well, I wasn't alone when I wrote mine, either. We will share all of that soon. You are just now getting glimpses of what life has in store. This last week has just been the tip of the iceberg! There is so much you can experience! I have so much I want to share! Something we need to talk about is for you to choose your words wisely.
Oh yes, I AM is important, right?
Yes.
Do you know the difference between believe and know?
Ummm...
That the things you believe, are just an opinion, or an imagining, not necessarily true? A belief is just a thought you keep thinking. But knowing, that means it comes from your own personal experience.
Okay.
So anytime you say believe or know, stop and identify that you are using the words correctly. People who live by default are living their beliefs. People that live by conscious intentions live by choosing what they know to be true.
That sounds a little complicated.
It does now, but I will help you with it.
Are you always going to be with me?
Yes.
How do I know this isn't just another dream?
"Jillian," Aunt Jana said as she shook her gently. "Why don't you go get ready for bed now?" Jillian picked her head up from her aunt's shoulder and looked around. She was still sitting on the couch with Tiffany Marie asleep on her lap. Uncle Tim was gone, and she looked at her aunt like she had seen a ghost. Jillian looked around the living room, wondering where Amanda went. I know I was talking to her, she thought. She sighed, and got up off the couch.
"Good night, sweetie. Sweet dreams," her aunt said, kissing her on the forehead.
"Was there anybody else here with us?" Jillian asked.
"Uncle Tim," her aunt said, turning off the lights.
"K, good night," she said and headed down the hallway to her room. She stopped and looked at the picture of Amanda. Am I going crazy, or is this gonna be an awesome summer? Oh, this IS an awesome summer!
She got ready for bed and followed her evening ritual. Talk with Tiffany Marie who wants to hear about my day! And as she explained about the What Not Shop, the three kids at class, and talking to Amanda, she found herself weightless, and drifting.
Jillian could feel the breeze on her skin. There was an extraordinary scent in the wind. Like white. She stood motionless, slowly inhaling and exhaling. Her chest rose and fell. Is this what white smells like?
Somewhere in the distance, a faint melody could be heard. As she focused on it, and nothing else, it seemed to grow closer, louder. It touched her skin, and then passed right through it, into her blood and bones. She began to not just hear the music. She could feel it, and then she was part of it.
Illianna watched. Jillian stood relaxed, her eyes closed, head tipped back slightly, her body swaying to an invisible music.
“Do you know why you are here?” Jillian heard a voice inside her say.
“Yes, I AM exploring, remembering, creating. That is all I have to do!” She heard her own voice say with such conviction, that a jolt of energy shot forth from her heart and surrounded her body. With her eyes closed, she could see this brilliant white light expand from where she stood and burst outward in all directions. This took her breath away. As she opened her eyes, all she could see was white. The ground was soft white, like fluffy cotton as far as the eye could see. At the horizon, there was a soft blue that graduated to a deep velvet navy overhead.
As she looked down she could see something stirring in the whiteness. It began to take a form and develop shades of color. As she focused on the shape, she realized there was a wolf now lying at her feet. His eyes met hers as he slowly moved into a standing position. He was still staring into her. Not at her, but into her.
Illianna had been closely observing. She bowed. The wolf slowly closed his eyes and bowed to her. Jillian was experiencing a new feeling. She was thinking she should feel fear. But she didn’t. “Accept, don’t expect,” Jillian heard from within. She focused on her stomach. How did it feel? It felt fine. She took a deep breath and slowly bowed to the wolf.
“Welcome,” she heard a deep growly voice say to her as she lifted her head. She looked into the wolf’s eyes. They seemed to have softened. There was something familiar about it.
“Hello,” Jillian said, starting to relax. Illianna tilted her head, and her large brown eyes squinted because of the large smile that was now upon her face. It was a look of utter sweetness and love, like she was giving the wolf a full-bodied hug with just her smile. It looked like she had found her long, lost best friend.
She took a deep breath and gently said, “Thank you for inviting us.”
The wolf smiled and nodded his head. “Jillian, I am LoneWolf, and this is my world. Welcome.” Jillian looked ahead of her, to both sides. She turned around. She looked down, and then she looked up. The only thing she could see was Illianna and the wolf. What was this place? She looked at the wolf and then to Illianna.
“Please, take a look around,” LoneWolf said as his eyes surveyed the horizon.
Jillian thought, there is nothing here but white. Then she heard her aunt’s voice. “If you are looking for more, you will find it.” So Jillian started to walk in the whiteness. Seeing nothing, she closed her eyes and relaxed. She began to hear a faint sound, like water. As she opened her eyes, the sounds of the water became louder. In the va
st whiteness before her, a fog started to swirl and churn, and as it evaporated before her eyes she found herself standing at the edge of a stream.
Upstream the sky was dark with low hanging clouds, thunder and lightning. The grey-green waves had patches of slime floating on top, and they were thrashing violently as if they would chew you up and spit you out.
Paranormal Summer (Indigo Moon Rising) Page 14