by Rayne, Piper
“Mission accomplished.” I sit up straighter, the thought of Holly’s tits in my mouth now a distant memory. “Sedona doesn’t want to go to college?”
She shakes her head.
“What the hell did I do wrong? Her and Phoenix and Kingston? All three of the youngest kids don’t want to go to college. My parents would be so fucking proud.” I lay my head in my hands.
I hear Holly’s office chair sliding and her walking around her desk. Next thing I know, her hand is on my thigh and she’s crouched beside the chair I’m in.
“I don’t think it’s anything you did. I can’t speak for Kingston, I don’t know him, but as for Phoenix and Sedona, it’s not uncommon for kids not to have their entire future mapped out at their age. They might see college as confining and keeping them from starting their lives. I had lots of students who were older either because they waited to start college or because they changed their mind about what they wanted to pursue. And what Phoenix wants to do doesn’t need a college degree.”
I blow out a breath.
“Sedona wants to follow in your mom’s footsteps and be a travel writer. I don’t think your parents would think badly of that, right?” Her hand runs up and down my leg.
I huff. “My mom went to college. That’s where she learned to write.”
“Maybe instead of laying the hammer down, you try to negotiate. She goes to Scotland, but she attends college there.”
Holly’s so naïve, and I want to kiss her right now because of it.
Fuck, I have all this shit going on and I want to kiss her? What the hell is wrong with me?
“Dinner tonight?” I ask to distract myself, because I’m about ready to let my sisters do whatever the fuck they wanna do.
My dad’s voice is in my head, replaying when I told him I wanted to try to go into the farm system instead of going to college. That conversation didn’t go well. He’s probably up there shaking his head in disappointment that I let Kingston skip college.
She smiles. “Let’s stay on track. There needs to be a firm line here. We said no dinners.”
“Have you called your dad?”
She stands and heads to the other side of her desk, her eyes scouring the courtyard outside her office. “Not yet, but I will later today.”
I sit back in my chair and rest my ankle on my opposite foot. “We have about a half hour before fourth period is over.”
Her gaze shifts to me. “I’m not doing it while you’re in the room.”
“Do you have his number?” I ask, ignoring her protest.
She glares at me as though I’m an idiot. She’s been stalking him, of course she has his number.
I hold up my hands. “Hey, I’m just asking.”
She sits in her chair and wheels closer to her desk. “I had it before I came to Lake Starlight.” She opens her desk drawer, pulls out a piece of paper, and stares at it.
“Then let’s call him.”
“Stop being so pushy.” She taps her pen on the desk, glancing away from me. “I know you mean well, but what if he doesn’t want to hear from me?”
I refrain from speaking the truth that there’s a high probability he doesn’t want to hear from her. If he hasn’t had a relationship with her up until this point, I doubt he’s been on eggshells, waiting for her to call. But she needs to discover that herself. Just like all the people telling me I need to stop chasing a dream that died nine years ago—I have to go to California and experience it for myself. Just like Holly, I’m praying everyone else is wrong.
“Come on. I’ll hold your hand while you call.”
She scrunches her forehead. “I can’t do it while you’re in the room.”
I stand. “Then I’ll wait outside, but I’ll stay by Fay. That way if you need me, all you have to do is look out the window and I’ll be there.”
“Austin,” she sighs, because that’s what she does when I push her into an uncomfortable position.
I head to the door. “I’d give you a big good luck smooch, but you’d probably frown upon that, so…” My hand lands on the doorknob, but I turn around and wink. “You got this.”
I walk out without letting her argue.
“Hey, Austin,” Fay says after I close Holly’s office door. “I’ve been meaning to talk to you. The parade, Phoenix’s singing. It was all too much to handle.” She grips her chest and tears well in her eyes. “I felt like I was at their wedding again. And”—her hand covers mine on the counter—“your eyes in that picture on Buzz Wheel were just like your dad’s when he looked at your mom that day.”
I retract my hand, my gaze shooting to Holly’s office. “Fay…” I say, irritation thick in my voice.
She waves. “I feel like it’s my job to do what your mom would’ve done. Stop playing games and admit that you like that girl.” She thumbs in the direction of the office.
“Holly’s cool.”
She shakes her head, her eyes boring into mine.
“What?”
“Austin.” She looks around. Vice Principal Ealey’s office is dark again, so it’s just me and her.
Holly picks up the phone and puts it back down, her gaze shooting to mine. I nod at her to pick up the phone, and her shoulders sag.
“Will you please stop acting like you’re not the caring boy I’ve known you to be your whole life? It’s my favorite quality of yours.” Fay puts her hand on mine again. “Your heart is triple the size of most men’s.”
“Did you just call me the Grinch?”
Fay laughs. “I’m serious. Your mom would love Holly. She’s a perfect fit for you.”
My eyes search out Holly, and I smile. She is perfect. I can’t deny that fact. A different time, a different place, hell, maybe even a few years ago, I would’ve jumped at the chance for something serious with her, but like the old saying goes, timing is everything. And in this case, time is not on our side.
Holly picks up the phone and presses some buttons. She bites her lip and circles her chair so her back is to me.
“Thanks for the advice. I do appreciate it, even if I’m not taking it.”
Fay shakes her head and taps her fingers on the keyboard. “You kids today are so selfish. You all lose sight of what’s really important with the whole me, me, me that’s on repeat in your heads.”
My eyes widen. I’ve never heard that judgmental tone from Fay before.
“What?” She must notice my shocked expression. “It’s true. You’re so hell-bent on leaving Lake Starlight but let me ask you a question. How bad is this town that built you? It was good enough for your entire family and you act like it’s a prison cell. These people love and care about you and you won’t get that in California.”
Her words are like a slap in the face, and I swear my cheek actually hurts. Is that what people think? That I loathe Lake Starlight? That I don’t appreciate the help they gave my family after our tragic loss? Just because I want to leave doesn’t mean I don’t love this town and everyone in it. Jeez, Fay sounds like a jealous fucking girlfriend.
Anger bubbles in my veins the more her blunt words register.
I lean forward, ready to lose my cool. The words in my head are dying to come out. Let me ask you, Fay, when is it my time? I raised seven of my siblings. I got a teaching job. I learned to cook. I learned to do laundry. I learned how to budget. To coupon clip. I’ve lived for everyone but me over the past nine years. When my buddies were out picking up girls and partying until all hours of the night, I was helping kids with their homework. When they were all making mistakes and figuring out who they were in their twenties, I was forced to become who I needed to be, not who I wanted to be.
Her eyes meet mine and I lean backward, inhaling deeply. I have too much respect for Fay to let loose on her.
“Thanks again for the advice.” I reach for a butterscotch candy off her desk.
She smacks my hand. “No butterscotch for you.”
“Whatever.”
I look to Holly’s office as she swivels he
r chair and hangs up the phone. She’s not smiling. Fuck.
“Do me a favor, Fay, don’t turn around and don’t let anyone in this office for about five minutes.” I knock on the top of her desk.
“And why should I do you a favor?”
I smile at her. “Because I’m your godson.”
She shakes her head, her smile small at first, but eventually she loses the fight.
I kiss her cheek. “I’m sorry, Fay.”
“Me too. I know you’ve sacrificed, it’s just…”
I nod, trying to get her not to say what I think she will. That everyone is this damn town wants Holly Radcliffe to save them by being enough to keep me in Lake Starlight. As much as I hate to disappoint people, I won’t let that stop me this time around.
I enter Holly’s office, not stopping until I pick her up off the chair and wrap my arms around her. “I’m so proud of you.”
Her arms grip me around the neck. “You don’t even know what he said.”
“It doesn’t matter, you called him. That’s a huge step.” I kiss her right under her earlobe.
“Austin!” she whisper-shouts.
“Relax, Fay’s doing me a solid.” I draw back. “So, what did he say?”
“We’re going to dinner Thursday at some steakhouse.” She nibbles her bottom lip.
“That’s great… isn’t it?”
She nods. “Yeah, I’m just nervous. He said he’s wondered about me.”
“All good news.” It is, but she still looks so scared and unsure that I blurt out my next words without really thinking about them. “Do you want me to go with you?”
She shakes her head. “No, that’ll just make it more awkward if I bring my boy… I mean, friend.”
I laugh, not at all upset about her slip, though it should probably bother me. “Okay, but I’m coming to your house after.”
“Fine.” She tries to say it begrudgingly, but I can tell that she’s actually glad I’ll be there.
“Now we have about three minutes to make out like teenagers without anyone seeing.”
She glances around.
“Trust me.” My hands cup her cheeks, and I press my lips to hers.
She must trust me, because this time her tongue slips into my mouth. I’m reminded of another perfect quality of Holly’s—with just one kiss, she can make me forget all the reasons we won’t work.
Twenty-Four
Holly
I drive through downtown Greywall, not surprised that my dad picked a restaurant in a neighboring town—his family probably doesn’t know I even exist.
After parking, I glance at the clock on my dash and pull my keys out of the ignition. Early is better than late.
The steakhouse is classy with dim lighting, linen tablecloths and napkins, and a nice atmosphere. A water glass and a wine glass are both set on the table, and as I take a quick glance at the menu, it’s clear that my mom couldn’t have afforded to eat here on her best night.
My phone dings in my purse, so I dig it out, reminding myself to breathe. I’m so nervous, I’m not sure I’ll be able to eat anyway. When I have the phone in my hand, I see a missed call from my mom. I’ll call her back later. There’re also a couple of texts from Austin.
Austin: You’re an amazing person. You can do this!
Austin: I’ll show you how amazing I am tonight. ;)
Austin must have sent those earlier, because the most recent one is from Dana. I tap on her message.
Dana: Karen’s on the hunt.
What the hell does she mean my mom is on the hunt? I message her back.
Me: What are you talking about?
Dana: She tracked me down at my apartment. She said you’ve been acting weird. She called the school you told her you were working at.
Me: WHAT!?!
Dana: My question is why did you give her a name of a school? If you’re going to lie you need to be vague not specific.
Me: Because it’s my mom and she doesn’t let those kinds of things go.
Dana: Then you should’ve stopped having so much sex and called your Mama more often.
Me: This is not funny. What did she say?
Dana: She threatened me and she’s kind of scary when she gets going…
Me: What did you tell her?
Dana: I told her that you wanted to get away.
Me: And?
Sweat breaks out at my temples. I need to call Dana then my mom, but this isn’t the type of restaurant you have a conversation on your phone in. Plus, I want to be here when my dad arrives.
Dana: She wanted to know where?
Me: And?
Dana: I caved and told her that you went to Lake Starlight, Alaska.
Dana: I’m sorry!
Dana: But you know Karen! She’d spank me or worse. And she’s really intimidating when she’s digging for the truth.
Dana: I really am sorry! Please don’t be mad.
Dana: Maybe this is a good thing.
Dana: She can be the one to reach out to your dad.
The phone rests in my hands, vibrating every half second. I sit there stunned and unable to respond to my best friend as I try to assess what this means.
“Holly?” a man’s voice asks, drawing my attention away from my phone.
He’s here. Right in front of me. Staring at me with a small smile.
I ignore the messages from Dana and push my phone into my pocket.
“Hi,” I say, teetering in my chair, unsure if I stand or not. Do we hug? I’m a stranger who happens to share half his DNA. Maybe he doesn’t even like hugs. He liked them with his new children though.
I don’t have to worry about making a decision because he slides into the chair across from me. “You’re so grown up.” He looks me over, a little unsure.
“It’s been thirty years,” I sneer then regret it. I want answers, not to run him off in the first sixty seconds. “I’m sorry.”
“That’s okay. I deserve it.” His silver watch sparkles from the overhead lights as he runs his fingers through the light auburn hair that matches my own.
“So…”
He picks up his menu. “Maybe we order and then we can talk?”
I nod, picking up my own menu, happy for the distraction so I can gather myself. As I glance over the dishes and the prices again, I can’t help but wonder if this is a place he visits regularly or is it a place for special occasions? Is he always this lavish? There’s so much I don’t know.
Deciding on the chicken, I place my menu on the table in front of me.
A waiter comes over, and my dad orders a bottle of wine.
“Do you drink red?” he asks.
I nod.
“Go ahead and order, Holly.”
“I’ll have the chicken carbonara and a Caesar salad please.” I hand the menu off to the waiter.
“Oh no, you have to get a steak. They have a bone-in filet here.”
The waiter smiles at me.
Does he think a sixty-dollar steak is going to make up for thirty years of his absence?
“I’m fine with the chicken but thank you.”
“Holly, I insist. It melts in your mouth. You have to get it.”
I stare at him for a moment and watch his face cave a little.
“But if you’d rather the chicken…”
“No, the steak is fine.” I look at the waiter. “Medium please and thanks.”
The waiter smiles, making a note while telling me how much I’ll love it, then he shifts his focus to my dad.
“Ribeye. Rare. No potato and a salad.” He hands the menu back, dismissing the waiter without a thank you.
Maybe it’s the fact my mom has been a waitress her whole life, but that gnaws at me. Then again, maybe he’s nervous and distracted like me.
“So, tell me about yourself. The call that came into my office said Lake Starlight School District. Are you working there?”
I nod, my throat constricting and not allowing me to talk. This was a bad idea. I feel awkward and
unconfident and unwanted. Why do I need to know this stranger sitting in front of me? I got this far in life without him.
“Excuse me for a second.” I slide out of my chair and grab my purse, bolting for the restroom.
Behind closed doors, my phone vibrates in my purse, and I pull it out to see my mom’s number. I shake my head. I can’t deal with that right now too.
There’s a string of text apologies from Dana, but I’m not mad at her. I should’ve never lied to my mom in the first place or put Dana in the middle. I glance at Austin’s message from earlier, and I smile.
Me: I think I made a mistake.
The three dots appear instantly.
Austin: No, you didn’t.
Me: How do you know?
Austin: Because you moved five thousand miles away to find him. No matter what happens, you obviously had to do this.
Austin: Want me to meet you somewhere?
Me: No, I’m fine. Just trying to figure out why I wanted to meet him now that I am.
Austin: Because you wanted to know him. You might not get the answers you want, but it’s your right to ask them. Just remember, you’re the strongest woman I’ve ever met.
My heart flips over. If he wasn’t so supportive, it’d be so much easier to deny my growing feelings for him.
Me: Thanks.
Austin: ;)
I tuck my phone back into my purse and head out to the table. My dad is on his phone, but he hangs up when he sees me crossing the restaurant.
“You okay?” he asks.
“Yeah, sorry.” I place my purse on the back of the chair and sit down.
The waiter must have come and poured the wine while I was in the restroom. I take a small sip.
“Are you living up here now?” he asks, ignoring the fact that I abruptly left the table.
“Yes. It’s temporary though. I’ll be leaving in two months.”
“Oh, that’s not a lot of time,” he says.
Is that disappointment I hear in his voice?
“I’m here to replace the principal while she’s on maternity leave.”