by Raye Morgan
He frowned. “Why are they exiled?”
“Because of the people who took over Ambria twenty-five years ago. The coup was pretty bloody, but a lot of people escaped. There’s a rather large group of us living in this country. More are scattered all over Europe.”
He nodded, seeming to think that over. “So these folks who took over—are they some sort of oppressive regime?”
“Absolutely.”
“Hmm. So what do you do at this agency? Don’t tell me you’re a secret agent—an undercover operative, perhaps?”
She glared at him. “What if I am?”
He grinned. “Well, there’s really nothing I can say that wouldn’t get me into trouble on that one. So I’ll just keep my thoughts to myself.”
“Don’t worry. I’m not an agent. I’m an analyst.”
“That’s a relief.” He paused. “So what does an analyst do?”
“I pretty much sit in a room and read articles in newspapers and magazines, and try to figure out what is actually going on in Ambria. I analyze information and write reports for policy makers.”
“Sounds like a great job. But what does this have to do with me?”
She gave him a wise look. “Over time, I’ve developed a theory about you.”
“You’re not the first.”
She hid her smile. “I’m sure I’m not.”
He looked at her quizzically. “How about a short wrap-up on this theory thing? I’ve got to get going on some more paperwork, and I don’t have time for anything long and involved.”
She shook her head. “Never mind. You’ll just laugh. Again.”
“Laugh at you? Never.”
Enough people had already laughed about her theory. For some reason, Kelly couldn’t stand mockery from him right now. She had to be on firmer ground with her ideas of his being Ambrian royalty before she told him the whole story. He’d already told her she was crazy to think he might be an Ambrian prince. She wasn’t going to go into that again right now. But she could try to get him to understand why she wanted so much to unravel this mystery.
“Do you ever do crossword puzzles?” she asked him.
He nodded. “There was a period of time during my recuperation when I felt like I was a prisoner in that hospital bed. But I had my crossword puzzles, and that was all I did, night and day.”
She smiled. “So you know what it’s like when you’re almost finished with a puzzle, all except for one block of words. You look the hints up, you try different things, nothing works right. You try to put it aside and forget it, but you can’t. No matter what you do or where you go that day, you keep fooling with that puzzle, trying different answers out in your mind. And then, suddenly, a piece of the tangle becomes clear and you think you have the key to the whole thing.” She looked at him expectantly. “Has that ever happened to you?”
“Sure. All the time.”
“You’re so certain you have the correct answer,” she went on, driving home her point, “but you can’t prove it until you go back and find the puzzle and write in the words and see for yourself. Right?”
“Sure.”
She threw out her hands. “That’s what I’m doing here. I’m trying to prove I found the right answer to the puzzle.”
He nodded, frowning thoughtfully at the same time. “So tell me, am I the answer or the puzzle?”
She grinned at him. “Both right now.”
Their gazes met and held, and she felt her pulse begin to race in her veins. There was something between them. She could feel it. All her stern warnings to herself about not getting involved melted away. She wanted to kiss him. That desire grew in her quickly and was stronger than she’d ever felt it. Every part of her wanted to reach out to him, to come closer, to hold on and feel the heat. Attraction was evolving into compulsion. Her brain was closing off and her senses were sharpening. His warm, beautiful mouth was becoming her only focus.
Joe looked down at her eyes, her skin, her lips, and he was suddenly overwhelmed with the urge to kiss her. Would she stop him? It wouldn’t be that unusual if he were to try to lose this lingering unhappiness in a woman’s love.
Well, “love” would be asking a bit much at this stage. How about losing it in a woman’s warm, soft body? Not unusual—it happened all the time. What if he took her in his arms and held her close and let his male instincts come back to life…?
He looked into her eyes again and saw the questions there, but also saw the hint of acceptance. Reaching out, he slipped his hand behind her head, his fingers in her hair, and began to pull her toward him. Her eyes widened, but she didn’t resist. His gaze settled on her mouth, and he felt a quick, strong pulse of desire, taking his breath away.
For the moment, she was his for the asking. But what gave him the right to be asking? This wasn’t the way it should be. She deserved better. She deserved real love, and that was something he couldn’t give her.
What the hell was he doing? Had he lost all sense of decency and self-control? He pulled his hand back and, instead of kissing her, turned away without a word. He felt nothing but self-loathing.
Kelly stood very still, watching him go, feeling such a deep, empty sense of loss that she ached with it. He’d been about to kiss her. What had stopped him? She knew very well what ought to keep her from kissing him. But what was his excuse?
Taking a deep, cleansing breath, she turned back toward Mei’s room and tried to calm her emotions, settle her jumping nerves. If kissing was out, she might as well start preparing for their walk.
Chapter Six
THE SUN SHONE on everything. There wasn’t a hint of fog. The sky was blue and the ocean was even bluer. It was a beautiful day.
“I see why they call it the Golden State,” Kelly noted. “Everything seems to shimmer with gold on a day like this.”
Joe nodded, gazing out to sea and pulling fresh sea air deep into his lungs. He loved the beach. Turning, he glanced at Kelly. She looked good here, as if she belonged.
“I called Angie’s family in the Philippines,” he told her. “They say they have no idea what happened to the nanny. I got the impression that they couldn’t care less.”
“You’d think they would want to know Mei was okay.”
He sighed. “It’s a long story, Kelly. Angie’s family didn’t ever like me much, and they act like they’ve written Mei off now that she’s with me.” He shrugged. “But that’s a problem for another time.”
Kelly couldn’t imagine how anyone could see Mei and want to forget her. But she quickly pushed that aside. Mei took up all her attention at the moment.
As they strolled down the promenade, Mei sat like a little princess, watching everything with huge eyes. She didn’t cringe when Joe came near anymore, but she definitely wanted Kelly to be in her range of vision at all times, and would call out if she lost sight of her. She loved the ocean. When they took her close enough to see the waves, she bounced up and down with excitement and clapped her hands.
Mei was a treat to watch, and Kelly glanced at Joe every so often to make sure he was enjoying it, too. He gave every indication of growing pride in his adorable child.
“Look at how smart she is,” he kept saying. “See how she knows what that is? See how she called the dog over? See how she stops and thinks before she calls you?”
She did all those things. The trouble was, she didn’t call him. And Kelly knew that was breaking his heart.
They bought tacos at a food stand for lunch, then stopped by a viewing platform to sit down and eat them. Kelly had brought along some baby food in a jar for Mei. The child took the food willingly enough, but then would forget to swallow. There was just too much to look at. She didn’t have time for the distractions.
They finished eating, and when they weren’t staring at the wild and beautiful surf, they sat back and watched Mei watch the people strolling by.
“I’ve never been to Ambria,” Kelly told Joe. “But from the pictures I’ve seen, the beaches look a lot like this.”<
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He turned to glance at her, then sighed and leaned back as though getting ready for a long ordeal.
“Okay, Kelly,” he said, as if giving in on something he’d been fighting. “Lay it on me. Tell me all about Ambria. I’m going to need the basics. I really don’t know a thing.”
She gazed at him, suddenly hit by the awesome responsibility he’d given her. If he really was the prince and she was going to be the person who introduced him to his country, she’d better get this right.
Clearing her throat, she searched her memory wildly, trying to think of the best way to approach this.
“Nothing fancy,” he warned. “And don’t take forever. Just the facts, ma’am.”
She took a deep breath and decided to start at the beginning. “Okay. Here goes.” She put on a serious face. “You know where Ambria is located. And you know it’s a relatively isolated island nation. The DeAngelis family ruled the country for hundreds of years, starting in the days of the Holy Roman Empire, when the Crusades were just beginning. Their monarchy was one of the longest standing ever. Until twenty-five years ago, when it ended.”
“And why did it end?” he asked, sounding interested despite himself.
“The vicious Granvilli clan had been their rivals for years and years. Most of their plots had failed, but finally, they got lucky. They invaded under the guise of popular liberation, gained a foothold and burned the castle. The royal family had to flee for their lives.”
“Yikes,” he murmured, frowning.
“Yikes, indeed,” she responded, leaning forward. “They sent their children into hiding with other families sworn to secrecy. The king and queen…” She paused, realizing she might be talking about his parents. “They were killed, but only after having arranged for it to be widely believed that all their children had been killed, as well.”
“So as to keep them safe from the Granvillis,” he said softly, absorbing it all.
“Yes. If the Granvillis knew they were still alive, they would have tried to find them and kill them, to wipe out any natural opposition to their rule. That’s why the children are called the lost princes.”
“How many are there?”
“There were five sons and two daughters, but no one knows how many might have survived.”
“If any did,” he reminded her.
“Of course. Remnants of the old ruling order do exist, but none of them know for sure what happened to the royal children. There are refugee communities of Ambrians in many parts of Europe and the U.S.A. Reunions are held periodically in the old Roman town of Piasa, high in the northern mountains, where they say the oldsters talk and drink and dream about what might have been.” She paused for a moment, her eyes dreamy as she pictured the scene. “Meanwhile, most of the younger generation have gone on with their lives and are modern, integrated Europeans and Americans, many quite successful in international trade and commerce.”
He nodded, taking it all in with a faraway look in his eyes, just as she had—almost as though he was sharing her vision.
“So what about these lost princes?” he ventured. “What’s happened to them?”
“Lately, rumors have surfaced that some of them did survive. These rumors have become all the rage. They’ve really ignited the memories of the oldsters and put a spark in the speculative ideas of the younger generation. Ambria has been a dark place, shrouded in mystery and set apart from modern life, for twenty-five years. It’s a tragedy for history and for our people. Ambrians burn to get their nation back.”
He laughed shortly. “Sure, the older ones want a return to the old ways, no doubt, and the younger ones want the romance of a revolution. Human nature.”
She frowned. She didn’t much like his reducing it to something so ordinary.
“Every Ambrian I know is passionately devoted to getting rid of the usurper regime,” she said stoutly.
He grunted. “Mainly the oldsters, I’ll bet.”
“Sure. Don’t they count?”
He shrugged. “Go on.”
“Different factions have been vying for power and followers, each with their own ideas of how an invasion might be launched. The conviction has grown that this can only happen if we can find one of the lost royals still alive. Believe me, the ex-pat community is buzzing with speculation.”
“Like honeybees,” he murmured.
That put her back up a little. “You can make fun of it if you want to, but people are ready to move. The Granvillis have ruled the country badly. They’re really considered terrible despots. They’ve got to go.”
Her voice rose a bit as she tried to convince him, and he turned and grinned. “A regular Joan of Arc, aren’t you?” he commented.
She colored. “No, of course not. But I don’t think you understand how passionate a lot of exiled Ambrians are about this.”
He sat up straighter and looked cynical. “Yeah, sure. People are totally passionate in the talking and threatening phase. It’s when you put a gun in their hand and say, ‘Okay, go do it,’ that they suddenly remember something they have to take care of at home.”
She swallowed back her first response. After all, he’d actually been one of the ones doing the fighting. He knew a whole heck of a lot more about that than she did.
“Maybe so,” she said. “But something has happened that is threatening to put a lot of Ambrians in one place at one time, and if one of the princes shows up…” She shrugged.
He looked up at that, curious in spite of himself. “What are you talking about?”
“Here’s what’s going on.” She leaned forward almost conspiratorially. “The old duke, Nathanilius, has died. He was the brother of the king who was killed during the invasion, and was considered the titular head of the family. The funeral is being planned in Piasa, and it threatens to be chaotic—no one knows who will show up, but they expect a lot of people who haven’t been seen in years.” Kelly gazed at Joe significantly. “The question is, who will try to seize the mantle of the old regime? Will the Granvillis try to disrupt the ceremony or even assassinate any of the DeAngelis loyaltists who will come out of hiding for the event? It’s a pretty exciting time.” She smiled. “Dangerous, too.”
Some of his cynicism melted away. “Wow. Interesting.”
“Yes.”
He frowned, thinking. “Twenty-five years ago.”
“You would have been about four, right?”
He merely nodded, looking out at the ocean. Memories—yeah, he had a few. He wasn’t about to tell her, but he did have some pictures in his head from when he was very young. He remembered a fire. He remembered fear. He remembered being in a boat in the dark. The sound of oars splashing in inky water.
But were they really his own memories? That was the trouble with these things. How much was from tales he’d been told and how much from stories he’d made up himself when he was a boy? He had a feeling he knew what she would say about them. But he wasn’t ready to surrender to her royal dreams.
He wasn’t sure he wanted to be a prince.
Besides, he had other things on his mind, the most important of which was finding a way to get his daughter to like him. He was getting better at looking at her without feeling Angie’s tragic presence. That should help. He had no doubt she’d sensed that from the beginning, and that had helped fuel her reaction to him.
In some ways he was torn. Anything that reminded him of Angie should be good, shouldn’t it? And yet it didn’t quite work out that way. He’d loved her so much. Losing her had been hard. But that was hardly Mei’s problem.
When you came right down to it, he himself was probably the roadblock to happiness there. He was pretty sure Kelly thought so. The baby was getting vibes from him, a sense of his pain, and she didn’t like it. Who could blame her? The thing was, how to get it to stop before it became a habit she wouldn’t ever shake? She couldn’t distrust him forever.
They walked slowly home, enjoying the adorable things Mei did. People stopped them to say how cute she was. Do
gs came up wagging their tails. Even the seagulls that swooped overhead seemed to be screaming her name. When one came especially close, then wheeled and almost lost its balance, Joe and Kelly looked at each other and laughed.
This was real life. This was pretty good.
But Joe’s smile faded as he thought of Angie and how she’d never had a chance to live this way with her baby. On impulse, he reached for Mei’s hand, hoping she would curl it around his finger. For just a second, she seemed about to try.
But then she realized it was his, and she pulled back and began to cry. Huge, rolling tears sprang instantly into her eyes. Kelly bent over to quiet her, but nothing was going to work this time.
“She’s tired.” Kelly looked up at Joe apologetically as she lifted Mei out of the stroller. “Don’t take it to heart.”
“Don’t take it to heart?” Had she really said that? A dark sense of despair filled him and he turned away. How could he not take it to heart?
“Joe, I need to give her a bath. Then I’ll read her a book and let her play before I put her down for a nap. Maybe you could come in and watch her play? Or maybe even read to her?”
“Yeah, sure,” he said. “Maybe.”
Kelly watched Joe walk away, and knew he had no intention of doing either of those things. Her heart ached for him, but she went ahead with her plans. Mei loved her bath and liked pointing out the animals in her books while Kelly read to her. She was ready for sleep by the time Kelly put her down. And just as she’d foreseen, Joe never showed up.
She searched until she found him in the garage, waxing down his surfboard.
“You didn’t come in to see Mei playing,” she said, trying not to make it come out like an accusation, but failing utterly.
He glanced up at her with haunted eyes and looked completely guilty. “I know. What’s she doing right now?”
“She’s asleep.”
He threw down his cloth. “Okay. I’ll go in and watch her for awhile a bit later.”
Kelly frowned, not convinced he really meant it. This did not bode well. But she had no hold over him. She couldn’t make him do something he didn’t want to do, could she?