It was as if she were a guest in their home, one that didn't know how to pitch in, and finally he could take no more and brought this to her attention, trying to be patient about it. She smiled and suggested a maid for the house and a nanny for the baby.
"No!" he blasted.
"We can afford it! You have that money Merriam left you, and I have money as well."
"No! I'm not touching that money...it's for our daughter and her future! Anything we need, we need to earn it. Work for it!"
"Well, then, I'll pay for a maid and a nanny."
"What's wrong with you, Deidre? Why can't you do it? I have three covers to get done, but I'm getting behind because I have to do freakin' housework!"
"Don't get upset with me, I'm perfectly willing to hire a maid and nanny. You're the one who's having a problem with it."
"You're here all day, doing nothing!"
"And it's boring! Which is something I've been meaning to talk to you about. I've decided to work. I'm going to take the position at the finance company over the loans and mortgages department. I-I start Monday...so…unless you can do it all, I suggest you look into hiring them." She swallowed nervously and lifted her nose up at him as he stared at her in disbelief.
"So you're going to run off to work when you don't have to, and leave our home to a maid and our child to a nanny?"
"What's wrong with a maid? Or a nanny for that matter, I had one!"
"Well, you sure as hell don't need to convince me of that!" he blasted. "Fine! Go to work! I'll do it all! Nothing new in that!"
"You're just being petulant and spiteful! I'm not cut out to be that kind of housewife! And there's no reason why I should be! There are many women out there who would love a job as a maid and nanny to get their bills paid! You ever think about them, huh? Nooo! Because you're so busy trying to bend me into June Cleaver! Well, I'm not!"
"Well you sure as hell aren't! Go! Go to work, get the hell outta my face! My daughter and I will do just fine!"
Time went by, she seemed to grow more busy, coming home later. He was spending more time raising their daughter, cleaning house, and painting like crazy while Angela napped, struggling to meet deadlines so as not to lose jobs. He was determined not to touch that money Merriam had left him, just as his mother had not touched hers. It was there when he and his brother and sisters got old enough to use it, and so would the $200,000 left to him. His daughter would have the same advantages that he had, and if there were ever anymore children, it would be split between them. Their relationship was strained with her spending too much time working, shopping, and at her social clubs, and when at home, they argued.
Times were too many that she promised to be home at a certain hour so he could make his meetings and presentations. She was always either late, or claiming to have forgotten all together, forcing him to take Angela with him. Their arguments grew in proportion and he threatened to leave her and take Angela with him. The prospect of that scared her enough to straighten up for a period of time, and then slowly...she'd slip right back again. Topping it all off, he had her mother to contend with. She had a habit of just showing up when she knew that Deidre was not there, subtly trying to seduce him.
The marriage crumbled.
"Shawn…Shawn…we're ready," Sylvia called from beside him, bringing him out of his reverie. He turned and looked up at her, smiling, he scooted from the booth, looking at his daughter standing by Sylvia's side holding her hand, holding it as if it were her lifeline. "You okay?" Sylvia asked. He stood tall beside her, blowing nervously from his mouth and adjusting his jacket, his stomach was tied up in knots. "Yeah...we better get going, we don't wanna be late. I still have to talk to Deidre."
They all turned, he reached for the check and all three walked up to the cashier to pay and then head for the courthouse.
Chapter 37
Sylvia sat thinking she would be glad when her stomach settled. She thought for sure she would not be able to keep her breakfast down. Right now, her stomach was upset with butterflies, whether it was because she was pregnant or dreading meeting Shawn's ex-wife, she couldn't tell. She would no longer agonize over it; before the day was up, she would know, or try to. She would pick up a pregnancy test and get the agony of wondering over with. Her car was parked at the Ramada Inn, so they were all in Shawn's SUV. Each one of them quiet with the uncertainty of the outcome once they reached the courthouse. Shawn was holding her hand as he drove, squeezing it on and off. Every stop light, he'd give it a little tug and squeeze, needing her to turn and look at him. She would, and smile, though neither felt like it. She knew how nervous he was, and with good reason. He had to tell his ex-wife that their daughter accused him of fondling her. Sylvia sighed with the thought of it. With her elbow propped up on the door window seal, the fingers from her right hand rubbing her scalp and temple, she knew she was not looking forward to being seen by that woman.
Granted, she'd purchased herself a nicer top to wear, added a bit more make-up...but she still wasn't up to this. Poor Angela was a nervous wreck. She didn't want to see her mother, she was afraid of being forced to go back to California with her. Sylvia stared out of the front windshield as he drove, the sky was clouding up, which meant snow or rain. She hoped not rain; if it froze, they would be in trouble. March could still be nasty with the weather. Seeing the grey clouds, feeling queasy with so much on her mind, and having to deal with so much right then, Sylvia fought back tears. She hated crying so much, but of late she couldn't get herself to stop. She was not a repetitious crier, but right now, she felt the moisture clogging up in her throat and the tears burning her eyes.
"Hey, you okay?" Shawn asked, squeezing her hand again.
She wished he hadn't done that, the words just uncorked her and the tears spilled. She tried to keep her face away and play it off, but it wasn't working. They were rolling. The light turned green and Shawn pulled away from the traffic to pull over.
"Oh, Shawn, don't pull over...I'm fine. We don't have time for this," she pleaded. He didn't listen, he pulled over into a Kwik Trip lot, put the SUV in park and turned to her, turning her face his way.
"Talk to me...what's going through your mind?"
Angela sat forward from the back seat, leaning towards the door and rubbing Sylvia's shoulder. "What's wrong, Sylvia? You okay?"
"You guys are going to make it worse. I'm fine...let's just get there and get this over with...please!" she said gently, giving Angela's hand a reassuring squeeze over her shoulder as she turned to Shawn. Using his thumb, he wiped her tears away, staring into her watery eyes. "I'm so sorry to be putting you through this."
"I know, Shawn, you don't need to keep saying it."
Angela shifted to the center console to get a look at Sylvia. "Why are you crying, Sylvia?" she asked, worried.
"Sweetie, sit back in your seat and buckle your seat belt. I'm fine. I'm tired, that's all...when I'm tired, I cry easy. I'm just worried about you, worried about how all of this is going to turn out." She smiled at Angela and then looked back at Shawn. "Please, let's go...I want to get this over with."
He drew in a deep breath, pulled her towards him with both hands holding her head and kissed her mouth and cheeks, using his thumbs to wipe away the remaining tears.
"Yeah...let's get this over."
At the courthouse, they entered with Angela between them holding both of their hands, and of course as soon as they entered, there was Deidre and her mother sitting on the hallway bench waiting for them before they all took the elevator to the second floor.
Sylvia's heart beat so hard in her chest, she felt it moving. Deidre was tall, slender and stunning. Dressed to the nines in a style that both enhanced her coloring and features, as well as her statuesque physique. She looked to be at the very least, 5'10 and was wearing heels as well. Her hair was a gleaming rich blonde, cut to precision above her shoulders. Her skin was crystal clear, made up just so...not too much, not too little. Her eyes were hazel-gold and framed by incredibly long eyelas
hes. The only thing that made Sylvia feel a modicum of satisfaction was that she had thin lips. She knew it was petty to gain any satisfaction from that, but she needed that trifle right then, feeling like a dowdy minority, still sick to her stomach.
Deidre's heart was pounding so hard she felt her face heat and blush at the sight of them. To see her daughter, holding this women's hand so tightly, and looking towards her with such dread, was like a punch to her stomach. Then to see Shawn looking at her the way he was, obviously concerned over her, crushed Deidre from within. Sylvia Payne was stunning as far as she could see. Rich, dark supple skin. Not a line in sight. She was dressed casual but comfortably, very fresh-looking. Compared to her height, she was almost petite, neat in her appearance with the most captivating dark eyes she'd ever seen. They stood out, with brows arching over them thick, smooth and silky black. Lips full, with the perfect shade of lipstick making them more luxurious and lush. There was something else about her as well…a certain air of frailty, as if she was struggling to keep something within her under control. She looked weak on her feet. Deidre's brows drew in with a sinking feeling that she was pregnant. She couldn't put her finger on it, but there was something about her that made her feel that way. She had to look away from her as something within her shook with the certainty. Oh, my God, I bet she is...I bet she's carrying his child! She turned her attention to her daughter as they drew near.
"Angela? Are you okay? Why have you done this? I've been worried sick out of my mind over you!" She knelt to look up at her daughter who was at that moment, looking at her as if she were the last person on earth she wanted to see, clinging to Sylvia's hand with one of hers and the other gripping her coat sleeve. "Angela! Come here!" she beseeched incredulously.
"I don't wanna go back. I love you, mommy, but...I want to stay here. Please...you can come and visit me here, but I don't want to go back there." Angela's fear made her go directly into her greatest worry.
"Now is not the time for this, we'll have to talk about it later, now come along."
"Ummm, Deidre, we need to talk. It's not that simple," Shawn cut in as he pulled his eyes from her mother.
Deidre looked up, and then followed suit by standing.
"What do you mean?" she asked, upset at having to look at him, hating that she had to stand and talk to him when her stomach was in such turmoil over seeing her daughter cling to his possibly pregnant fiancée. She hadn't missed the ring, the platinum and diamonds screamed at her—It's official…He's going to marry her! He'd spent a lot of money on that ring; knowing that irritated and devastated her, making her want to attack him for being able to go on with his life when she was stuck, stifled with so much regret. At that moment it hit home that he was going to marry another woman and there wasn't a thing she could do about it. Her stomach churned with such pain, she felt she might swoon from the heartache made ten times worse by the fact that she had no one to blame but herself.
Looking into his eyes, seeing him again like this…was overwhelming. Nothing hurt so much as not being able to feel those arms go around her again. Not hearing his voice speak with compassion as he used to. So many times he'd threatened to leave her, and she'd try to live as he wanted her to, but it had all seemed so futile to live that way when one didn't need to. Then she left him, believing that it would put some sense into his head, make him see things her way. One thing then led to another, they'd reached an impasse that neither could figure how to cross, and suddenly...it was over.
"Can you follow me to the end of the hall? We only have a few moments before we have to go upstairs and meet with the judge."
"Meet with the judge…why? What is going on?"
"Follow me and I'll tell you," he instructed, taking her by the arm to lead her away from her mother. Deidre pulled her arm away from him. She couldn't take feeling him touch her with her innards in such turmoil.
"Emmm, Deidre…I don't think this is wise of you. Letting him talk to you alone...you should always have witnesses to everything, someone to hear in your behalf," Georgiana spoke up, pulling her eyes away from Sylvia to her daughter and Shawn. She would not look at him; she felt she'd stared as much as she dared when he and his daughter walked in with that woman.
Shawn's jaw clenched for control; he could think of no one he hated more than Georgiana Wherrington.
"We don't have time for this, Deidre."
"Why can't you tell me here?" she asked, considering her mother's words.
"I'd rather not," he spoke up.
"Why not? What is it about?" Deidre asked. "Why must we be alone?"
"Either you talk to her with me present, or you don't talk to her at all," Georgiana pressed.
"Fine! I won't talk to her at all!" Shawn blasted, fed up. He turned to Sylvia and Angela. "Let's go," he ordered, then grabbed his daughter, pushing her before him and taking Sylvia by the arm, heading towards the elevator.
"Wait a minute! Shawn! Wait!" Deidre called, following him to the elevator. He pressed the button and stood looking straight ahead and refused to say another word to her.
"Will you please just tell me what's going on?" she asked, when her mother said, "I think what I told you before we got here is about to happen. You'll learn to listen to me more often and be prepared," Georgiana reminded her daughter, smug in her estimation of the events about to take place. Sylvia felt as if she was going to faint, her head was swimming and prayed to god really hard to keep her senses about her. The elevator doors opened, Shawn hustled them in, still ignoring Deidre and her mother. As soon as he stepped in, he pressed the button to the floor they were going to and stepped back. Deidre had to hurry in, pressing her hand to the safety panel that keeps the door open while entering it. The door closed with all five inside and Sylvia took slow, deep even breaths to keep from swooning.
"Please, Shawn, there's no need for this. Just tell me, for goodness sake," she asked, trying to keep her tone under control when she felt anything but.
"You'll find out so-o-on enough," her mother sang out and then sighed, actually enjoying it all, things like this made life interesting...anything tumultuous to stave off boredom was okay by her.
"I certainly hope you don't have some crazy idea of taking my daughter from me. When I leave, she leaves with me. When you left California, you made your choice! You just up and left and told no one anything! If you think you're going to blame her running away on me, you've got another think coming. Angela! Get over here, now! Right now!" Deidre demanded angrily.
"Daddy?" Angela called up to him, growing afraid.
"She's staying right where she is!" he responded.
"I'm her mother! I have custody of her! Not you! Angela, get over here, now!"
The elevator doors opened. Shawn reached down and picked Angela up into his arms, took Sylvia by the arm, and strode from the elevator. Sylvia saw white lights before her eyes and her mouth filled with saliva. She spotted the ladies washroom not five steps away and launched herself for it, praying that she made it in time. As soon as she hit the door, vomit spewed from her mouth faster than she could catch it. She rushed into the bathroom with her hand catching the vile tasting acidic fluid, dashed into a stall and tossed up all of her late breakfast. Her body convulsed and clenched, tightening and squeezing her stomach as she gagged and shook, coughing it up and choking on it.
"Sylvia!" Shawn shouted, shocked, and rushed in behind her, caught off guard by her suddenly being sick.
"Shawn! It's the ladies room!" Deidre shrieked.
"I don't give a damn!" he blasted back at her, sitting Angela on the floor. By the time he turned to Sylvia, she'd shut the stall door to keep him out as she continued throwing up, unable to stop.
Chapter 38
"Can you give us a few more minutes? My fiancée is in the ladies room, very ill," Shawn tried to explain to the clerk of courts who'd come looking for them.
"I'm sorry, the judge is waiting. I'll have an officer come out and wait for her to escort her in, but you all need to go in now t
o the judge's chambers," the clerk explained to them as Shawn leaned against the wall outside of the ladies room with Angela there and her arms wrapped around his waist. Deidre and her mother stood across the narrow hall watching, waiting and very uncomfortable with the circumstances as Shawn completely ignored them out of concern for Sylvia.
"Can I open the door and let her know?" he asked.
"Is anyone else in there?" she asked.
"No."
"Sure, go ahead."
Shawn turned, pushing the door open and called in, "Sylvia, the clerk has come for us, we'll be in the judge's chambers, sweetheart."
He received no answer, it was silent inside. "Sylvia!"
With a weak voice she answered, "I heard you…okay."
Shawn stood a moment with the door open, he wanted to be with her right then, not going into that courtroom. But his daughter needed him, he looked down at her, she was looking up at him, scared to death. He paused another moment, and didn't care who heard. "Sylvia…I love you."
Sitting on the toilet feeling as if she could not possibly stand, Sylvia leaned her head against the toilet stall. "I love you...too," she returned with a smile.
Deidre wanted the floor to open up and swallow her whole.
Georgiana rolled her eyes to the ceiling.
The clerk made a face of sympathy. "Aaah, she'll be okay. I'll come out and check up on her, promise."
* * *
Deidre sat spinning in disbelief. She could not believe what was happening. What she was hearing. Too stunned to do anything other than to gape as Shawn explained in detail, exactly what took place immediately after getting the phone call from Deidre informing him that their daughter had run away, all the way until Angela's claim, his arrest and the evening officer giving temporary custody to Sylvia until that day when they came before the judge. The judge sat at his long table across from them. Angela sat in the center with her mother and grandmother to her left, her father and an empty seat for Sylvia to her right.
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