Seeing her look defeated was much worse. He cupped her face with his hands and tilted her chin so she had to look up at him. “You should tell her the truth.”
“I can’t.”
“She is stronger than you give her credit for.”
“She would worry too much. I—”
Rhys held up his hand to stop Amanda’s flow of words. “She will worry about you just like I do. We both…care about you.”
Rhys couldn’t believe he’d almost admitted to loving Amanda. To distract them both, he pulled her to him, kissing her with the ferocity her full, alluring lips inspired in him.
Amanda responded with wild passion. Her lips devoured his. As soon as he slid his tongue into her mouth, hers tangled with it.
Her reaction overwhelmed Rhys. Desire pulled him under so quickly he couldn’t get air. He’d only intended a short kiss, one to jolt her away from despondency. Now, he couldn’t stop himself.
He ignored the twinge in his injured side as his hands slid up her ribcage to cup her breasts. His body was already well on its way to healing, and his senses reveled in the hardness of her nipples as they strained against the sleek fabric. She arched her back slightly, pressing herself against his hands.
Desperate to feel the softness of her belly against his groin, he let go of her breasts so he could pull her hips against him. His cock ached. His denial two nights ago made it even more difficult to keep from taking her right there in a stranger’s sitting room.
A sitting room? Oh God, they had to stop. He meant to pull away from her, but at that moment, her hand snaked between their bodies and tentatively stroked his cock. The sensation rocked him so hard he bit her lip. She moaned and moved her lips downward to torment his neck.
“Amanda!” His voice was strained and hoarse. “Amanda, we can’t.” But it was too late. The door swung open, and he heard a horrified gasp.
Chapter Ten
Amanda pulled away from Rhys and found herself staring into the horrified eyes of Lady Winston. The woman was fanning herself and looking as if she might collapse.
“Could I help you to a chair, my lady?” Rhys asked as though nothing unusual had been afoot.
His words seemed to lend the lady righteous strength. She stood up straight and ceased the wild movements of her hand. “I think not. I do not allow such behavior in my house. Whatever did you think you were doing?” She turned to look at Amanda. “Are you all right, dear?”
“Yes, my lady. I’m quite fine I…that is I—”
“We were celebrating,” Rhys said.
Lady Winston arched one of her brows. “Celebrating what?”
“Our engagement.”
Amanda lost the ability to breathe. Rhys could not possibly have uttered the word engagement. She wanted to check her ears to make sure they were not clogged, but her disbelief had her frozen in place.
“You expect me to believe you intend to marry?” Lady Winston asked, her voice filled with disdain.
Rhys gave her one of his most charming smiles. “I do indeed. I apologize for our rude behavior. When Miss Halverston answered my proposal, I am afraid I lost control of my emotions.”
Amanda’s barely repressed the strangled sound that rose to her mouth. What was he thinking telling such a lie?
Lady Winston’s eyes narrowed. “What were you doing in my sitting room?”
“Ah. I should have apologized for that from the first. I know I took a terrible liberty, but I wanted a private spot to ask my question, one where we had no fear of being interrupted by other guests seeking a respite from the dancing.” Lady Winston shook her head. “I suppose the gardens would not do on a rainy night like this, but there are plenty of rooms downstairs that are private enough. You could also have called on the young lady in her own home like a proper gentleman.”
“That is true, I—”
Lady Winston cut him off. “What have you to say, Miss Halverston?” Amanda glanced at Rhys, but he gave no indication of how she should proceed. It took her several seconds to get her voice working, but finally she said, “I am ashamed of my behavior, of course. We should never have trespassed in your private chambers.”
“Yes, yes,” Lady Winston said, waving her hand back and forth. “But are you or are you not intending to marry this man?”
“Oh,” Amanda said, her voice far higher than usual. What could she do? She had to play along or the scandal would be enormous. “As Mr. Stanton said, I accepted him just a few moments ago.”
Lady Winton raised both her brows. “Betrothed or not, your behavior is still scandalous, and your invasion of my privacy is unacceptable. I do not expect to see either of you in my house again.”
She merely stood there staring at them until Rhys offered his arm to Amanda. She reached out to take it, and they exited the room. As they walked away, she felt as if she were standing outside herself, watching her actions from afar.
This is not happening. She repeated the statement over and over as Rhys led her toward the stairs.
When they stopped on the landing, she asked Rhys to pinch her.
“What?”
“Pinch me so I can wake up.”
He had the nerve to laugh. “I am afraid this is no dream. We have gotten ourselves well and truly ensnared.
“You do understand that I have no intention of marrying you.”
“What I understand is that I just salvaged what I could of your reputation at great cost to myself.”
Amanda snorted. “I don’t want to be married any more than you do, and I don’t give a fig for my reputation.”
Rhys stared at her until she had to look away. She didn’t, did she? She wanted nothing more than to be left alone. Why should she care now if she made a scandal? And why did it hurt so much that the idea of marrying her was so onerous to him?
Rhys leaned down to her ear and spoke in a low voice. “You’ve a younger sister who can only be harmed if word gets out that you have offered your favors without the benefit of marriage.”
“I…” Her protest died. He was absolutely right. Elise wished to make a good match, and wrong or right, her reputation and Elise’s were linked. Elise’s open nature and charming smiles made it easy for her to overcome people’s expectations that she was as icy as Amanda, but even her charming sister could not erase the taint Amanda’s ruination would have on the family.
“But I can’t marry you.”
“You can, and you will. In fact, it might be best if we escaped from this place and made straight for Scotland.”
Amanda felt as if the breath had been knocked out of her. “Most certainly not. I will play along with this betrothal, and after a decent interval, I will break it off. You can say I jilted you. I could not care less. I plan to stay far away from London after this Season anyway.”
“Do you think for one moment that Lady Winston will waste time in sharing what she saw? It will cause a sensation, but if we marry quickly, all will be forgiven.
Otherwise no matter what you do, your reputation and Elise’s will be in tatters.” Panic rose. Amanda’s heart raced. Her fingers and toes felt cold and strangely numb.
“I cannot do this. I swore I would never marry.”
“So did I. This is not easy for me either, but I will not allow my actions to ruin you.” He pressed his hand into the small of her back and gently pushed her toward the stairs.
How could she allow herself to be trapped like this? Once Rhys’s passion for her cooled, he would pursue women as he always had. If she ended up alone because she chose not to marry, she could be happy. But she couldn't bear being abandoned by a husband who no longer cared for her. Of course she could become one of the loose married women of the ton who changed lovers the way they did ball gowns. In other words, the sort Rhys normally had liaisons with if the rumors had it right.
By the time they reached the ballroom, Amanda felt physically ill. “I can’t go in there. I’m too dizzy.”
Rhys’s eyes widened when he looked at her. She must
be as pale as she imagined.
“You can do this, Amanda. You are not the fainting type.”
“I’m not the marrying type either, but look what’s happened to me now.”
“We must speak to your aunt before the rumors reach her.” Rhys was right, but her legs felt like lead and her stomach pitched so violently she feared she might lose her last meal if she had to navigate the oppressive crowds.
“Could you retrieve her while I wait by the door? Tell her I am feeling unwell and wish to go home.”
“What about your sister?”
Amanda sighed. “She cannot be left to face the rumors alone, and she will certainly have a lot of questions.”
Rhys nodded. He took Amanda’s hand before he left her and brought it to his lips.
“Will you be all right?”
“Yes. No. Just go find them.”
*
Amanda couldn’t stop her foot from tapping the floor as she listened to the tick tock of the clock on the mantel. She felt as if she were awaiting a death sentence. She sneaked
a quick glance at her aunt, who was seated across the room, before turning her attention back to the carpet.
What was going through Aunt Claire’s mind? Rhys had joined them in the family carriage and explained their predicament during the ride. Aunt Claire remained frighteningly silent during the tale. She kept a neutral expression, showing no sign of the emotions that must have been coursing through her.
Amanda drew her breath in slowly, not wanting to draw attention to herself. She had embarrassed her aunt in the past with her eccentric ways, but she had never brought such a scandal down on the family.
When Rhys finished speaking, Aunt Claire exhaled loudly. “We will announce this engagement in the morning.”
Amanda had promised herself she wouldn’t argue with her aunt, but she couldn’t stop herself. “There must be another way. You don’t really expect us to marry, do you?” Aunt Claire glared at Amanda. “I am aware that you did not intend to marry, but your behavior this evening left you with no other option.”
“But we—”
“Amanda.” Her aunt’s sharp tone silenced her.
Rhys cleared his throat. “If there was another way, I would not force this on you, Amanda.”
“It was no more your fault than mine.”
Aunt Claire piped up. “Indeed, you did not think before you acted. You seem to have been doing a lot of that lately, young lady.”
“I’m sorry, but—”
Her aunt interrupted. “No more protests. I would like to speak with Mr. Stanton alone. I will call you later to discuss our plan of action.” Aunt Claire had always been so reasonable in the past, so willing to listen to her ideas no matter how outrageous. It shocked her to be dismissed in such a fashion—as if her aunt and Rhys were going to plan her future and she was expected to go along like a
docile lamb. But guilt mixed with her frustration. She had brought this on herself. Her aunt was right, she didn’t think rationally when she was with Rhys.
“Amanda,” her aunt scolded her. “Go upstairs and I will call you later.” As she crossed the room, she was careful not to look at either Rhys or her aunt. She knew her anger would explode if she did.
When she opened the drawing room door, her sister leapt back. “Is it true? Are you really going to marry him?”
Amanda sighed. “It seems inevitable.”
Elise took her hand as they climbed the stairs. Once they were in the privacy of Amanda’s room, Elise asked why Amanda hadn’t revealed her liaison.”
“I wasn’t really a liaison,” Amanda said.
Elise raised her brows. “I know you and Cassandra think I’m naïve, but even I suspected there was something between you two. Don’t try to tell me there isn’t.” Amanda walked to her window and stared down at flowers growing in her aunt’s courtyard. “Lady Winston assumed Mr. Stanton forced his attentions on me.” Elise snorted. “He would have found himself flat on the floor if he’d tried such a thing. Besides, he’s not the type of man who would do that.”
“How do you know?”
Elise smiled. “Well, why would he need to? Women fall at his feet.”
“Elise!”
“You have to admit he is unbelievably handsome.”
“And dangerous.”
“If you thought that, you wouldn’t have anything to do with him.”
“He’s dangerous to women like you.”
“Women like me?” The bitterness in Elise’s voice drew Amanda around to face her.
“You mean women who are too innocent to take care of themselves.” Amanda didn’t think she’d ever seen her sister so angry. “Elise, I didn’t mean—”
“Yes, you did. You treat me like I’m not intelligent enough to take care of myself in London. I know what hell Cassandra went through. You seem to forget that I grew up in
the same place you did. I would have run away with you if I hadn’t been at school. At least I would have if you’d trusted me enough to tell me your plan.”
“Elise, I’m sorry.”
A horrified look crossed Elise’s face. “Oh, Amanda. I’m sorry too. The last thing you need right now is me yelling at you. Tell me what really happened with Rhys.” Elise never ceased to amaze Amanda. Even when she was really angry, she cared so much about others she was willing to put her own problems aside. Amanda gave her a hug. “I should have confided in you, but I didn’t want to tell anybody, because I might have to think more deeply about what I feel for him.”
“So you do care for him, as more than a lover.” Amanda nodded, but she didn’t say any more.
“Then marrying him won’t be so bad.”
“It will be worse than bad. He’ll eventually tire of me. Then I’ll have to exist like so many wives of the ton, pretending to be happy when I know he is keeping a mistress or two or three.”
“Are you so certain he’ll tire of you?”
“A man like him cannot stay with one woman for long. No will blame him for straying. Not like they want to blame me for being stupid enough to be curious.”
“Perhaps it won’t be as bad as you think. I’ve seen how he looks at you.”
“Like he wants to devour me. I’ve seen it too, but it won’t last.”
“There’s more there, Amanda. His expression is usually hard, aloof, but when he looks at you he becomes almost wistful. You bring out something in him that no one else does.”
“Rubbish”
“I know you think I’m too romantic, but this is real, Amanda. He is not the same with you as he is with others.”
Amanda couldn’t let herself believe her sister’s assertions. The worst thing she could do was begin to hope this marriage could be anything more than a way to avoid a terrible scandal.
She wondered what Rhys was feeling. Was he angry? Surely he must be. He’d never intended to get himself trapped in this fashion. Would he resent her after they were married? Did he want an heir? He hadn’t planned to marry either, but then so many men rejected marriage for years only to eventually succumb to the need to have their name live on.
She’d never intended to have children. Of course if he hadn’t put a stop to it, her reckless behavior the other night could have led them down that path. She’d heard whispered rumors of ways to prevent such a thing. It might be unfair to deny Rhys the possibility of progeny, but she could not in good conscience bring a child into what would surely become a bitter home. She would not make a child suffer as she had.
Elise sat on the bed beside Amanda and took her hand “You must try to make the best of your situation. At least consider the possibility that Mr. Stanton is in love with you.”
“No matter how much you want it to be, this is not a love match. He’s marrying me because he has no choice.”
“But you know he desires you. Otherwise he would never have…” Elise’s voice trailed off, and her cheeks turned a lovely shade of pink.
Amanda shook her head. “I’m certain there are
many women he desires, but he isn’t going to marry them.”
“No, but—”
“What happened tonight is a disaster. One I am going to suffer the consequences of for the rest of my life. It’s best I accept that now.”
*
Rhys accepted the cup of tea Lady Morgan had poured for him. “I think she’s in shock.”
“Of course she is. She had always prided herself on controlling her own destiny. The idea of answering to a husband horrifies her. She would rather live a cold, lonely life than risk having her freedom restrained.”
Rhys exhaled slowly. He felt the same way. How could they ever make this work?
And why was it so important to him that they did? Most men in his position would do their duty by the girl then continue their lives much as they had before. But he was in love with Amanda, no matter how much he wanted to deny it. If they were going to marry, he wanted a true union.
Lady Morgan interrupted his thoughts. “I’ve let Amanda believe I expect her to marry you.”
Rhys raised his brows and studied the older woman. “Don’t you?”
“I think that would be best. However, if you cannot convince me you will not hurt her, I will find an alternative. I am not above telling society you tried to force yourself on her and letting her escape to the country to recover from the shock.” Anger coursed through Rhys’s veins. “I did no such thing.” Lady Morgan gave a wry smile. “I know that. Anyone who pays attention can see the passion simmering between you two. I didn’t say I believed my tale. I said I would do what was necessary to protect my niece.”
Rhys hated Lady Morgan for her willingness to lie, but he also respected her for loving Amanda so much. “I do not take threats lightly.” Lady Morgan put her cup down and gave him a thorough once-over “I imagine not.
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