by Caitlin West
A dangerous present, a frightening past, an uncertain future.
Abigail Wright has learned a lot about her family’s history in a few short days. She’s also landed an amazing boyfriend, been reminded of how great her friends are, and knows her future should be brighter than ever. Unfortunately, Ian Preiss seems hell-bent on throwing a wrench in all her carefully laid plans.
The arrival of her mother encourages the Pillar representative to come clean on a variety of topics, not the least of which may be more shocking than Abby’s potential inheritance from her father. As one evening goes from strange to uncomfortable, a revelation might just be enough to alter Abby’s perspective on whether or not she can leave her destiny behind or embrace it fully.
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This book is a work of fiction. Names, characters, places, and incidents either are products of the author’s imagination or are used fictitiously. Any resemblance to actual events or locales or persons, living or dead, is entirely coincidental.
Style and Disgrace
Copyright © 2014 Caitlin West
ISBN: 978-1-77111-827-9
Cover art by Carmen Waters
All rights reserved. Except for use in any review, the reproduction or utilization of this work in whole or in part in any form by any electronic, mechanical or other means, now known or hereafter invented, is forbidden without the written permission of the publisher.
Published by Devine Destinies
An imprint of eXtasy Books
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Style and Disgrace
Avalon Nights 3
By
Caitlin West
Chapter One
Unwelcome Guest
Nerves never bothered me before but there was a time in Texas when we were about to take stage and the crowd was screaming for another band. Awkward!!
—Abby’s Facebook
“That’s my mother!” I rasped to David. “I don’t know what to do! What to say! I mean…holy crap! I haven’t seen her in twelve years and here she shows up on my doorstep at midnight!”
“It’s all right,” David whispered back. He placed a steadying hand on my shoulder. “You should probably find out what’s up though. You don’t want to leave her out on the porch.”
“But…you and I…and I…” My exasperation level was maxed out. All I could do was stammer.
“I’ll tell you what. I’ll go upstairs and give you some privacy. That way, if you need me, I’ll be close by. And if you find you need me to leave, that’s fine, too. You can let me know after chatting with her.”
The caring look in his eyes, the sincerity of his voice, and the affection I could feel emanating from him were overwhelming. I wasn’t prone to breaking down into tears, but the emotions that moment conjured up were almost enough to overcome my resolve. I took his hand firmly and leaned close.
“I…feel very lucky to have met you.”
“Don’t say that,” David replied, kissing me on the head. “I’ll be upstairs. Yell if you need me for anything at all, okay?”
“Sure.” I watched him go just as another loud round of knocking hit the door. “Just a moment!”
“I’ve been standing here for nearly ten minutes! Are you ever going to open up?”
“In case you hadn’t noticed, it’s past midnight!” I cracked the door, but did not immediately offer to let her in. “After twelve years, you think it’s okay to get huffy I didn’t get to the door quick enough? Seriously?”
She was dressed in a black wool suit jacket and skirt which might have not been all that bad had she not coupled it with a white fox fur resting on her shoulders. Being overdone was her specialty, but this was particularly embarrassing. Gaudy wooden earrings made her ears droop and a matching bracelet rested on her hand.
The bag was a knockoff of some kind. The cheap faux leather was a serious contrast to the poor dead animal hanging out on her upper half. She had nude hose, black heeled shoes, and a ridiculous hat that could’ve been cool on just about anyone else.
Including Godzilla.
Hell, especially Godzilla.
“Are you going to leave me in the cold or invite me in?” My mother was capable of ignoring the most pointed questions in the world as if I never spoke. Half of me wanted to slam the door and tell her to go to hell, but my curiosity got the better of me.
I stepped aside and she entered like a queen, giving my living room a royal appraisal. Her judgmental aura seemed to fill the place and when she let out a sigh, I could tell something had offended her sensibilities. I wondered if I should have been ashamed of just how much satisfaction I got from her lack of approval.
“So what the hell do you want?” I asked. “Since you ignored my first questions.”
“Aren’t you going to offer me anything?” she asked.
“What? What do you mean? Like what?”
“Coffee, tea, a soda…water. You’re a terrible hostess, Abigail. I thought I raised you better.”
“You didn’t raise me at all!” I let the full force of my voice carry, not quite a yell, but with all my vocal training I could speak louder than most people could scream. “You can’t claim any of my qualities, good or bad.”
“And I’m still waiting for you to offer me something.”
“Jesus! Fine, what can I get you? Do you want something? Something soothing? Can I make you a damn espresso?”
“No, I’m fine. Thanks for asking.” She wandered into the kitchen and looked around before taking a seat at the dining room table. The plates were still out from my meal with David. “Wow, and you don’t clean up after yourself either?”
“If you came here to criticize me, then you can just take yourself right back out the door.” I gestured for the exit. “Maybe you didn’t notice I’m not thrilled to see you.”
“Really, Abigail, I’m shocked!” She sniffed indignantly. “I am your mother.”
“A biological accident, I’m sure.”
“We have a great deal to discuss. You must believe I came here for a reason.”
“I’d be lying to you if I said I cared, but since you’ve decided to interrupt my life, bring it on. What the hell do you want?”
“This is about your father. He made me promise something before you were born.” She picked at her jacket, keeping her eyes averted from me. “He told me if anything happened to him, then I was to give you some things when you turned thirty. I thought he was being ridiculous, but here we are.”
“My father wanted you to give me something.” I folded my arms over my chest. “People are coming out of the woodwork about dear old dad. What were you supposed to give me?”
“I don’t know, I lost it a long time ago.”
“And so ends another useless conversation with my mother.” I filled the honorific with as much sarcasm I could muster.
“There was more to it than just giving you something,” she replied, “and since I left, I’ve learned a great deal about him…about you…and about the man who killed him.”
My eyes widened. “This is all very ominous.” I was too shaken to be flippant, but I recovered quickly. I didn’t want her to see it. “I really need you to get to the point.”
“I understand you might have met him already. Ian Preiss is his name.”
“Wha
t?” My concern turned to skepticism. “How do you even know about him? Who put you up to this? Do you need money? Are you working for some tabloid?”
“This is not a laughing matter, Abigail.” The authority in her voice made me laugh.
“This reminds me of the time you were out on some drunken bender with one of your asshole boyfriends, came home after a week, and decided to scold me about a curfew you never told anyone about. Remember that? You always had a habit of being gone and expecting your made-up rules to be obeyed.”
“You really should be listening to me.”
“What I find most sad about this is that I trust Ian Preiss more than I trust you. I don’t know what your motivation is beyond proving you’re an irresponsible bitch. Trust me, I got that memo a long time ago. You don’t have to reinforce it now.”
“Abigail, you…”
“Will not listen to anything else. Get out!” I pointed at the door. “You’re not welcome here. Not now…not ever. If you show up again, I’ll call the cops.”
“But I—”
“You didn’t even come to your father’s funeral.” I shook my head. “Why should I care about anything you have to say?”
“This is important!”
“There were plenty of things you should’ve considered important. Now you get to live with the consequences…those being that I want nothing to do with you. I’m an adult now that made it despite you. Now…don’t make me tell you again.”
Mother set a card down on the table and tapped it. “In case you change your mind, that’s where I’m staying. Call me at any time…day or night. I’ll be there for another week.”
“You might want to make other plans.”
“I’ll go.” Mother stood up, pacing slowly across the living room. “I…I am proud of you. You’ve done very well.”
“Too bad it took you thirty years to give a shit.”
At the door, she cleared her throat, looking at me expectantly.
“Are you kidding?” I stormed over and threw it open. “Go!”
“We’ll speak soon, Abigail. Good night.”
The moment she was clear, I slammed the door and started to pace. She had always been a master of pissing me off, but this was literally her command performance. Someone must have put her up to it and the fact she brought up Ian made it all the more suspicious. Money had always been a problem for her, so it probably wouldn’t have taken much to convince her to mess with me.
Why now? Why do it when I’ve got so many things going on? David, the new manager, the Sphere crap, the new release…it’s a miracle all this pressure isn’t crushing me.
“I trust that she’s gone.” David’s voice startled me and when I turned to look at him, I was thrust back into reality. Tears of frustration tickled my cheeks. “Are you okay?”
He closed the distance between us, brushing my cheeks with his thumb before taking my hands. The warmth of his skin was a comfort to me and I was able to let out a long, trembling breath. Adrenaline had my heart pounding hard in my chest. I looked up into his face and shrugged.
“Do you want to talk about it?” he asked.
“There’s not much to talk about,” I replied. “She did that to me all the time when I was a teenager. My grandfather got to the point where he’d try to warn me. She found fault in me no matter what, whether I had done something to deserve it or not. I went from wondering if she’d come back to praying to God she wouldn’t.”
“That’s hard…”
“She made it really easy to hate her. That was her one gift in life.”
We stood there silent for a time. Every second that passed washed away my frustration, smoothing my nerves until the encounter with my mother felt more like a bad dream than an actual event. Sammy was going to freak out when I told her what happened. She knew the whole story of my sordid past.
“What would you like to do?” David asked, drawing me into a hug.
“I don’t know…” I muttered. “Just…hold me? Please?”
“For as long as you’d like,” he whispered into my hair and I believed him. This was the comfort I needed. That’s what love was supposed to be like. I hadn’t really known it before, but now that I did, I had no intention of letting it go.
Chapter Two
Attempted Violence
Airport television: lobotomizing passengers one twenty-second segment at a time.
—Abby’s Twitter
David spent the night but all we did was cuddle. The men I had dated in the past wouldn’t have been cool with that, but this one was different. He could take pleasure in simply being close, in being together. I didn’t feel guilty or exploitive for enjoying his company as I did. On the contrary, his arms were safe and warm. Precisely what I needed after the impromptu confrontation with my mother.
We got out of bed at seven and had breakfast together. The sun was out, peering down on the glistening lawn and casting rainbows over the table through drops of water clinging to the windows. I invited him to hang out for the day, one of the few I’d have off for a while, but he received a text calling him away. There was a problem at the magazine and he had to go in for a few hours.
“I’m really sorry,” he said, taking my hand. “I’ll make it up to you?”
“I don’t know…” I gave him a coy look. “Will you be my date for the pre-release party tomorrow?”
“I’d love to. What time?”
“Starts at nine but we’re making a band appearance. I’ll get you a pass and we can meet inside if that’s okay?”
“Yeah, that’s fine.” He leaned close and kissed my forehead. “You sure you’ll be all right?”
“I’ll be fine.” I gave him a brave smile. “Besides, it’s not like your work disaster would go away if I said I wouldn’t be.”
“True enough…but I’ll hurry if I have to. Or you could come with me?”
“Like this?” I laughed and shook my head. “No way I’m leaving the house looking like Elsa Lanchester.”
He tilted his head, brows furrowed. “Who?”
“The Bride of Frankenstein?”
David laughed. “C’mon now…”
“Hey, she’s hot…but I ain’t cool enough to swing that image.”
“You’re crazy.” He backed away. “Must be a musician thing.”
I escorted him to the door. “No, it’s a Wright thing. Didn’t you hear my mother last night?”
“Fair point.” We hugged at the door and I watched him go, leaning against the doorframe. The few minutes it took for him to depart were blessedly free of thinking. My mother’s return was relegated firmly to the back of my mind and for a few lingering moments, I was able to just enjoy the fact David was in my life.
When the door closed, that was another matter entirely. The emptiness of the house closed in on me like an oppressive blanket when it was already too hot. I busied myself with cleaning up the dishes from the night before, made the bed, and took a shower. None of it alleviated the sense that home wasn’t nearly as comfortable as it should’ve been.
I went for a walk, dialing up Sammy half a block away. A sense of loneliness took residence in my heart, weighing me down to the point I practically shuffled along the sidewalk.
“Abby? Hello?” Sammy’s voice crackled on the phone before clearing up. Her tone suggested that she had just woken up, but with her that could mean she was hip deep in a movie or playing the piano. I swore if none of us ever called her, she’d forget how to use her voice.
“Hey.” I barely recognized myself. The relief in that one word jarred me out of my slump enough to make me straighten my posture and walk with more certainty. “It’s good to hear your voice.”
“What’s wrong?” Sammy went from casually sleepy to alert and concerned. I felt bad for wringing out her worry, but I really felt like I needed it. “Where are you?”
“Just taking a walk near home,” I said. “Something happened last night…”
“With that David guy?” Protectiveness mixed wi
th aggression came through the line loud and clear. “Where is he?”
“It wasn’t him. Can we…are you busy today? I don’t really want to be alone.”
“I’ll be there in ten minutes. Your place?”
“Yeah, see you soon.”
I hung up and made my way back home. It took a minute to convince myself to go inside. What was normally a sanctuary seemed like hostile territory and when I finally crossed the threshold, all I could think about was hurrying to get back out.
Vanity eventually beat out ambiguous emotions and I took a few minutes to apply some makeup. The sweatpants and baggy sweater were a little too frumpy for me to be out in the world in. I could only handle so much I gave up before I’d go crazy. I changed into a pair of jeans, boots, and a black blouse.
The effect made me look a little better, but I couldn’t quite shake my stricken expression. A knock at the door suggested I didn’t have time to worry about it. I grabbed my jacket and purse before hurrying downstairs and throwing open the door.
Only it wasn’t Sammy that had knocked.
A fist lashed out, bare knuckles sailing toward my face before I could so much as gasp. It seemed to move in slow motion, giving me plenty of time to make out the pores on the person’s skin, the blond hairs curling around the cracks in the fingers, and the white flesh stretched over the bone.
Warmth spread over me and I thought I had been hit so hard I didn’t even register the blow. My feet felt firmly planted on the floor, so I hadn’t been knocked down. A man’s muffled scream echoed as if far away. The world around me seemed distorted as if I were seeing it all while submerged in water.
The punch never landed. My attacker was hurled away from the porch by some unseen force, tossed through the air until he landed hard on the pavement. The world returned to normal just in time for me to hear the crack of his spine and the squishy, wet thud of his skull as it glanced off the ground.