INJUN JOE
This is getting a little over my head.
KILLS MANY ENEMIES
These are not the conversations we have on our buffalo hunts. Why am I vaguely uncomfortable?
TONTO
Me know he care. Me can tell. But he cowboy in Old West. People there do not talk of such things. So we must keep secret. Must it always be like this, me ask? Me want place where we can live our lives, not wear masks. Be free to love. But instead, we must always play the game, be macho, shoot big guns, get in fist fights. Live lie. Me no like live lie anymore. Me want more. Me want a real life. Me want to come out of canyon!
BILLY JACK
What are you saying?
TONTO
Nothing. Just thinking aloud. Never mind. Me talk too much.
POCAHONTAS
You didn’t … did you kill him?
TONTO
Kill who?
POCAHONTAS
The dead white writer.
TONTO
Oh no. Me good guy.
INJUN JOE
Old buddy, old pal, we’ll get you a little freedom. Or die trying.
OLD LODGE SKINS
The two of you are truly brave. I envy you. I am as old as the hills, always have been, and I cannot change. I cannot even imagine the journey you attempt. Changing the world is for the young. I will stay and tend the campfire.
BILLY JACK
I will stay with you, Grandfather.
KILLS MANY ENEMIES
I will not leave your side.
OLD LODGE SKINS
Go then. Travel well. Our blessings go with you.
POCAHONTAS
I do not want to leave them. They must come with us.
TONTO
Hmm, yes. No good if left behind.
INJUN JOE
If they don’t wanna go, they don’t wanna go. What you gonna do? Hold a gun to their head?
POCAHONTAS approaches the old man.
POCAHONTAS
Yes, Grandfather, you have the wisdom of years, but please do not see that as a hindrance.
OLD LODGE SKINS
I was made old. And have always been old. That is the way of things.
POCAHONTAS
Grandfather, a twig breaks easier than a single branch; a branch breaks easier than a limb; a limb breaks easier than the trunk of a tree. And while we are on this wood metaphor, a two-hundred-year-old oak can change shape and become a fine house or a fleet of fine canoes, a totem pole even, many great things. Do not let age stop you.
OLD LODGE SKINS takes a peek at the machine.
OLD LODGE SKINS
It is a fine-looking machine, isn’t it?
INJUN JOE
“Fine” is just a word. This thing is our dreamcatcher. It will get rid of all our bad dreams and make our good dreams come true.
OLD LODGE SKINS
Will it make me young? I want to be young.
KILLS MANY ENEMIES
But, Grandfather … you are a grandfather. An Elder. And an Elder that is not old … what is that?
OLD LODGE SKINS
A young man.
KILLS MANY ENEMIES
How can you want such a thing? What will happen to all your lines of wisdom? Your grey hair of understanding … It cannot be.
OLD LODGE SKINS
My young warrior, you must understand. I’ve never been young like you. I’ve always been this age. I’ve never run with the buffalo like you. Or fought great battles either. I seem to have memories, but … I remember them with my mind, not my heart. Yes, I want to be young. I want to see those battles for myself. I am tired of waiting in the teepee like a frightened old woman for the young warriors to return home with their tales of bravery. I want to be the one to come home with scalps. Can this be done?
INJUN JOE
We can find out.
POCAHONTAS helps OLD LODGE SKINS approach the desk.
OLD LODGE SKINS
I thank you for giving an old man one final chance.
KILLS MANY ENEMIES
Grandfather …
OLD LODGE SKINS
Yes, my son.
KILLS MANY ENEMIES
I will join you.
TONTO
Me confused. You just say you stay behind.
KILLS MANY ENEMIES
With the grandfather. If he sees it best to move on, I will not contradict him.
BILLY JACK
I thought you were happy with what you were.
KILLS MANY ENEMIES
I am. I thought I was. I don’t know anymore. The more you all talked, the more I thought. I have this long, unmanageable hair, and I am always … finding things in it. I’m tired of it always blowing in my face; it’s always so windy on the prairies. And those horses … I have never liked horses. Nasty, brutish animals. But I must ride them. I would not be Kills Many Enemies if I didn’t ride into the enemy’s village on a horse. I would be Killed By Many Enemies. And I have no sense of humour. I want to be funny. I want to know irony. It is boring out there on the prairies, day after day, week after week. I mean, you gotta do something to break the monotony. Warriors aren’t the funniest bunch of people to hang around with … always trying to look and act macho. No. I have had enough. I want more.
INJUN JOE
That all? You want to be … funny?!
KILLS MANY ENEMIES
Yeah, and maybe a job. And short hair. And no more damned horses. And some place that’s warm in the winter and cool in the summer, with lots of those cool breeze boxes over there. No bugs too. That should about cover it.
INJUN JOE
Okay, a bit specific but not unexpected.
TONTO
One left.
They all look at BILLY JACK.
OLD LODGE SKINS
Join an old man on his last adventure. Together we will take coup.
BILLY JACK
I have no dreams. Only reality. I’ve been alone before. It doesn’t scare me.
OLD LODGE SKINS
You are so young to be so bitter.
BILLY JACK
I am the product of war. White man against Indians. Americans against the Vietnamese. That can make a man bitter. It would be nice to … maybe … be somebody at ease with himself. With his heritage.
POCAHONTAS
Listen, my friend. I want to leave the love that was created in me behind. I am just realizing this can be done. It is false and misplaced. Maybe you can do that with your bitterness. That is why we are going on this journey. To leave behind what we don’t like about ourselves. What has wrongly been forced upon us. To be free.
BILLY JACK
You sound so sure. But without bitterness, what will I be?
POCAHONTAS
Somebody a lot less bitter. That is not so bad, is it?
KILLS MANY ENEMIES
Come with us. When we arrive … wherever we arrive, I will tell you a joke. It will make you laugh. A very hearty laugh.
BILLY JACK
(to INJUN JOE) Do you want me to come on your journey?
KILLS MANY ENEMIES
Not just his journey. Our journey. Your journey.
INJUN JOE
It makes no never mind to me. As long as you keep your fists to yourself.
TONTO
Me think you should come.
POCAHONTAS
Please. We started this voyage together, we should finish it together.
INJUN JOE
You afraid there, muscle boy? It could get scary.
BILLY JACK
The last time anything frightened me, I was a child.
POCAHONTAS
Maybe it’s time to change that. It can be fun to be scared.
BILLY JACK
It would be nice to bring healing instead of pain. To spread knowledge instead of violence.
KILLS MANY ENEMIES
Boo! (to TONTO) Was that funny?
TONTO
Not really. Sorry.
BILLY JACK think
s. He is wracked by indecision.
BILLY JACK
(to INJUN JOE) Do you still think I killed the writer?
INJUN JOE
Him? It don’t matter now who killed him. He’s dead and we’re not. (pause) Did you?
BILLY JACK
No. Did you?
INJUN JOE
No. It seems nobody killed the white writer, then. Bit of a mystery, huh?
BILLY JACK
Do we just leave him here?
INJUN JOE
Why not? He was going to leave us where we were. So, are you with us?
BILLY JACK
I … am with you.
OLD LODGE SKINS
It is a good omen.
TONTO
Now we can begin. What we do now … Kemo …
INJUN JOE
Hey! No more of that.
They all crowd around the computer. INJUN JOE sits down in the chair and looks at the computer. He doesn’t move.
POCAHONTAS
What’s wrong?
INJUN JOE
Uh, anybody know how to work this thing?
BILLY JACK
I think so. It looks like a typewriter of some sort. Do you want me to …
INJUN JOE
No. Let me. I want to do it. Just … somehow … tell it to make me able to read and work it. Then I will take it from there.
BILLY JACK hesitantly taps away at the computer, writing a sentence or two. Suddenly INJUN JOE stiffens up, like he’s getting an idea.
INJUN JOE
Gutenberg! It’s all so simple. My turn! (shifting positions with BILLY JACK) Hallelujah! I hope everybody’s been to the outhouse, ’cause we ain’t stoppin’ for nothing. (looks at writer’s body) Thanks for nothin’. Okay … here we go.
INJUN JOE begins to type maniacally on the keyboard, laughing. And the lights start shifting around, before before going down.
End of Act One.
Act Two
Lights come up to reveal the very same office where the dead white writer had been before. Time has passed but little has changed, except the people. Their clothing, speech, and mannerisms are now contemporary. The six companions are sitting in chairs, facing each other in a circle. They look uncomfortable. Some are smoking. They make small talk amongst themselves as they wait for somebody to get things started.
MIKE
Well, welcome, everybody, to our first meeting of the month. And wow, everybody’s here today. That is truly a good omen. Glad to have you all here, together again. So who wants to start? Huh, anybody? Floor’s open.
Again another uncomfortable pause. Finally BILL takes a deep breath, and stands up.
BILL
All right, I’ll get this freak show started. Hi, my name is Bill, and I’m an alcoholic.
EVERYBODY
Hello, Bill.
BILL
I haven’t drank in, oh I guess a coupla months now. I guess that’s pretty good, huh?
They all applaud him.
MIKE
And why did you drink, Bill?
BILL
Hell, for the simplest reason in the world …
JIM
A woman?
BILL
Hell no. Women are hardly simple, trust me. I drank to get drunk. Next question.
MIKE
Bill, why did you want to get drunk? There’s gotta be a deeper reason.
BILL
Pressure, I guess. You see, I’m under a hell of a lot of pressure at work. As you know, I run the Flaming Arrow Casino …
SALLY
Yeah, the one out by Highway 73. That’s a nice place.
BILL
Thanks. Wait till you see the renovations. The biggest air conditioning system in the province. And picture a huge medicine wheel over the roof of the casino, with all the lines made by laser beams.
JOHN
Isn’t that kinda sacrilegious?
BILL
Hell no. It’s all good. We got a write-up in Architecture Today. The style is called Nouveau Native. We even had the whole placed blessed by Mike here. Eh, Mike?
MIKE
Yeah, it took 143 braids of sweetgrass to smudge the place. That’s one big casino.
BILL
You know what they say … size matters.
He waits for a laugh that doesn’t come.
SALLY
Do you got bingo?
BILL
Bingo?! No, I don’t “got” bingo. That’s so rez.
FRED
Rez …? Res … residential school? Are you talking about residential schools? I went to one of those. I remember …
MIKE
We know, Fred. That’s why you’re here.
FRED
That’s why I’m here.
JOHN
You started drinking because of it.
FRED
I drink because of it.
MIKE
But not anymore.
FRED
But not anymore. That’s why I’m here.
FRED starts to cry.
BILL
Oh man, he’s starting to cry again. I hate it when he does this.
SALLY
Leave him alone.
MIKE
Fred. It’s okay. It’s me. Did you have another flashback?
FRED
They don’t go away. The memories. I can still see them. Smell them. It hurts, Mike. It hurts. Are you sure I don’t drink anymore? I sure could use one. It makes them go away.
MIKE
That doesn’t help, Fred. It only makes things worse. That’s why we’re all here. To support each other. Your friends are a much better crutch to lean on than drinking.
JIM
Me, I’m here for the donuts.
SALLY
Shut up, Jim.
MIKE
Fred, you know I’m your friend, right?
FRED
Yes. You’re my friend.
MIKE
I’m the one who helped you, remember? I got you into that treatment centre. The one I stayed at. I became your sponsor. I drive you here for every meeting. I take you to the sweats, Fred. I’m your friend and I wouldn’t lie to you. Okay?
SALLY
You listen to Mike, Fred. He knows what he’s talking about.
FRED
My friends … you guys are my friends aren’t you?
BILL
You bet.
JOHN
“All for one” and all that sort of stuff.
FRED
We’ve always been friends, haven’t we?
MIKE
I guess you could say that. Ever since the beginning. Come on, let’s take our seats again.
SALLY
Bill, if we can, I want to get back to the bingo issue …
BILL
Nobody plays bingo anymore, Sally. Get with the times. We got blackjack, keno, slot machines, roulette, craps, baccarat, and a half-dozen other games from around the world that you ain’t never heard of …
SALLY
No bingo … Now that’s sacrilegious!
MIKE
People, we seem to be getting a little off topic here. Bill, you were telling us about how you became an alcoholic.
JIM
Oh, who cares anymore?
JOHN
I care. He is our brother. He must be supported.
BILL
Thanks, John. Like I said, it was the casino. Way too much pressure. Way too many decisions. Drinking helped me not get so nervous and frustrated. I discovered owning your own liquor licence is a mixed blessing. Man, if this thing goes down the tubes, it’s over for me.
MIKE
Positive thinking, Bill. And how’s the family?
BILL
Jill’s living up north, with the kids. I miss them.
SALLY
Maybe they’ll come back. Once they see how well you’re doing.
BILL
Sally, you were always the optimist of the group
. I think that’s why I’m working so hard on the casino. I don’t want to think about Jill and the kids, or how badly I want a drink. The more I concentrate on the casino, the less time I have to worry about anything else. (to JOHN) Oh, John, by the way, did you bring my cigarettes with you when you came down?
JOHN
Yep, ninety-four boxes in my trunk, but we’ll do business later.
JIM
Can we speed this up?
SALLY
What’s your hurry?
JIM
I got things to do. Important things.
SALLY
Speaking of important things, Chief Jim, when do we get our welfare cheques?
JIM
They’re in the mail.
SALLY
What mail? You live half a kilometre down the road. In your new house. The band office is a kilometre in the other direction. And who ever heard of a band office with a hot tub? It’s easier and quicker if I come up tomorrow and pick it up directly.
JIM
You can do whatever the hell you want, but it’s still going to be in the mail.
MIKE
Now, Jim …
JIM
Look, Mike, I never wanted to be a part of this stupid circle. I don’t have a drinking problem.
MIKE
We’ve all heard that before.
JIM
A couple glasses of wine isn’t worth all this shit.
JOHN
Then why are you here?
For a moment, JIM looks uncomfortable.
JIM
Because … because you guys are all here.
MIKE
Do you hate being alone, Jim?
JIM
I get nervous sometimes … it’s like somebody’s watching me. Us. Something like that.
JOHN
And people call me paranoid.
BILL
Well, if you’d stop blockading the Tim Hortons, people might like you more.
JOHN
Hey, that’s a righteous political act that demonstrates our sovereignty against a symbol of Canadian imperialism.
BILL
For God’s sake, it’s owned by that Wendy’s hamburger chain. In the States. Do your research, John.
JIM
Seriously, people. I haven’t felt right in a long time.
FRED
Me either.
JIM
For some reason … somehow … I feel safer with you guys. I don’t know why, but …
MIKE
Jim, are you reaching out to us?!
SALLY
I think he is.
JIM
Oh, go to hell.
MIKE
No, no. Jim. Stay with us. Let’s explore this feeling. Is this why you embezzled that money from the Department of Indian Affairs, and the band office, and those other two businesses … for a sense of security if something goes wrong? A nest egg? It’s quite common, you know.
Dead White Writer on the Floor Page 4