“And what if I do not want these powers? What if I would give it up just to save one life instead of standing aside while everyone I care about suffers?” The tears were flowing freely now.
“That is not your fate, illusino,” the du-toath said in a low voice.
Johai touched my hand, and I realized I had jumped to my feet. I unbunched my fists and found blood pooling in half-moons on my palms where my nails had dug into the skin. The du-toath tutted and reached for a rag in a bucket nearby. He gave it to me to wash my wounds, and it had a pungent odor that stung my nose.
“We all have destinies. Some are great, and some are small. But we cannot fight fate,” the du-toath said after settling back down behind the fire.
I lowered my gaze and did not comment further. Was this my fate, to forever look into the future and never be able to change anything? To kill the man who had saved my life? I felt as if the room swayed. It was ridiculous, not possible, but—I looked sidelong at Johai. Would I forever be burdened with the ability to see backwards and forwards and forever to walk alone?
Chapter Two
Neaux guards were waiting at the inn where I had rendezvoused with Johai. A man in hosen and wearing a deep blue doublet chatted with the barmaid. His back was to me, and I could not see anything but his dark curly hair, which was pulled back in a tail at the base of his neck. Beau stepped in front of me, shielding Johai and me from sight. I peered around his shoulder and watched the exchange.
“Perhaps that man alerted the embassy,” I said, without looking to my companions. The guilt was tying knots in my stomach.
“It would appear so,” Johai remarked.
I felt worse not having him chastise me. If he had, then at least I could have defended myself.
“We should leave the city,” Beau said and turned down the street and marched in the other direction.
“What about the horses?” I asked as I glanced back towards the Neaux guards and the man. Who is that man? Perhaps he is the ambassador?
“We’ll leave them behind,” Johai replied. “We cannot risk detection.”
They both headed back in the direction we had come. I lingered a moment longer, and as I did, the man turned and looked over his shoulder in my direction. His eyes widened, and there was no mistaking it, he had seen me. Duke Jon Sixton raised his arm as if to hail me. I ran in the opposite direction.
I caught up with Johai and Beau, who gave me slanted glances.
“Jon Sixton is here in the city! He saw me!” I gasped. I looked over my shoulder, waiting for Duke Sixton to come after us with the Danhadine soldiers who had accompanied him, but he did not. Jon Sixton, when I met him, had been a merchant’s son, but in his time at court in Keisan, he had risen in power to become Duke of Sixton. He was also a member of the Order of the Oak and a friend of Adair’s. I suspected Adair had sent him here to find us. Why does he not pursue us? Unless it’s a trap. They’re waiting for us to flee the city, and then they’ll capture us. Is that why there are so many soldiers in the city? Even to me it seemed excessive. However, Johai had split a ship in half with the power of the specter, so maybe it was not unreasonable for Adair to send so many people after us.
We ran down the alleyway, not hesitating to look for pursuit. Beau led us towards the city gates, which loomed overhead. The great iron gate was drawn back, and I could see men walking along the catwalk above it, pacing. Below and just beside the gates, Danhadine soldiers talked in knotted groups.
“Wait,” I called and leaned against the wall and took a moment to catch my breath. “They know we’re in the city. They saw Beau, and the merchant told him I was here. They’ll expect us to run, and without horses we cannot get far, even if we manage to slip past those soldiers.”
The men exchanged a glance, and I knew they were both weighing the risks and benefits.
“The population could aid us in blending in,” Beau said after a tense silence.
There was little time to debate. Many of our decisions had been made on impulse since we had fled Danhad. Our lives were at risk if we lingered, and if we did not find somewhere to hide soon, we would be captured.
“Very well,” Johai replied, his mouth tight and his shoulders tense. I followed him away from the city gates, and every couple of feet I glanced over my shoulder, checking for pursuit. To my surprise and relief, none came.
I worried about lingering too long in the city, especially with a heavy Danhadine presence. I wanted more than ever to continue our journey. Sitting idle as we were felt like we were a target, especially with our enemies close at hand.
As twilight encroached on the horizon, we stumbled into an inn on the far end of the city from where we had entered. A round woman with a smiling face sat us at a table and poured dark ale for us to drink. Johai held his glass with one hand and tugged at his braid with the other. The walnut dye I had used to disguise him did not fit his aquiline features. I often wondered how his natural blond would look as opposed to the white I had become accustomed to.
“We should not stay here more than a fortnight; that should be long enough to let things die down,” Johai said at last.
I stared down into the amber liquid in my cup and let my thoughts chase themselves in circles as the men made plans.
“Do you think Adair suspects we fled to Sanore?” Beau asked with a calm that seemed unreasonable.
Does it matter? If he did not know before, he knows now.
“Why else would a substantial Danhadine force be sent here?” Johai asked in return. “I overturned an entire ship. He would not risk sending too few men. He is many things, but he is no fool.”
Beau did not respond, but his eyes flickered towards the doorway as if he expected the soldiers to burst through the door at any moment and apprehend us.
“What of our coin? We cannot hope to sustain ourselves here for very long,” I asked, trying to insert myself into the conversation. The two of them often took it upon themselves to make decisions, treating me as if I were a simple-minded girl.
Johai extracted a small purse from his waist and dropped it onto the table. The coins within jingled, but the bag was thin. “We’ll need to find a way to increase our funds before leaving the city.” He sighed. “I will return to the inn tomorrow and try to retrieve the horses. Mayhap if we sell them, we can get enough coin to buy our way onto a caravan.” He pinched his brow.
I had few skills to speak of, except for my powers, which I was reluctant to ply. I felt responsible for our situation, but there was nothing I could do to improve it. If one merchant had recognized me, another might. If I hadn’t lingered at the previous inn, Jon would not have seen me. We would be on our way by now.
“It’s too dangerous to return to the inn. They’ll expect us to come back,” I said, thinking of Jon Sixton lying in wait for us to return.
Johai sighed. “You’re right.” He looked at me from across the table; his sapphire eyes pierced me through. For a moment the color changed from blue to black, and my stomach turned, and I looked away. The specter seemed closer to the surface than ever before. Johai’s words earlier in the day haunted my memory. Am I fighting a battle I cannot win? How can I possibly kill him?
Beau cleared his throat, ending the awkward tension. I gave him a grateful smile, which he ignored, and he pretended to drink his ale. I knew he would not touch a drop. He was too watchful, and perhaps a bit too paranoid, to ever get into his cups.
“I will find employment, and once we have the coin, we will leave Sanore,” Johai announced, ending our discussion.
That night, I went to bed on a lumpy mattress in a room I was to share with Johai. He took the floor. For convenience we continued our story of being husband and wife—we could not afford the extra room. He had arranged some blankets and pillows on the ground. I lay awake, unable to close my eyes despite my exhaustion. I could feel every inch between Johai and me. We had often slept in close quarters, but that was out in the open under the stars, with Beau a few feet away, watchful and s
ilent. Though Beau sat sentry outside our door, refusing a room and rest, he may as well have been miles away.
To preoccupy my thoughts, I pondered Jon’s presence in the city. What scheme were Adair and the Order at? Did this have anything to do with his plans to conquer Neaux and bring it under one joint rule? Or was this Jon’s own ploy, for what I could only guess. I rolled over onto my side and considered seeking Johai’s opinion. However, as much as I craved his perspective, I also feared my own curiosity. If I were to investigate further or even allow myself the opportunity to entertain trying to figure out why he was here, I knew I would fall right into Adair’s hands.
“Maea.” Johai’s voice whispered across me, and I shivered.
“Yes?” I regretted the expectancy in my voice. What was I hoping for?
“I think you and Beau should leave the city together. It would be safer if you fled south towards Biski territory. He informed me that he has allies down there that would keep you safe.”
I hesitated to answer. It would be simple to run away, leave Johai behind, and try to forge a life for myself. I entertained the thought for a moment, but in the end I knew I could not abandon Johai, even if the du-toath said there was no other way. I was too stubborn to give up on him.
“You know I will not,” I replied.
He sighed, and no more was said on the matter.
Eventually, I fell asleep, and when I did, I dreamed. A young woman with long, curling, blonde hair wore a blue dress, which flared about her as she spun in circles. Her golden curls trailed away from her like rivers of gold. A crowd gathered around her and clapped and cheered as she spun. She was the sun, and they were gray clouds outshone by her radiance. No matter how sweetly they called to her, she disregarded them, absorbed in her own joyous dance. She spread her arms and closed her eyes as she continued to twirl.
Then the crowds faded away, leaving just her in the center, spinning in a shaft of light. A red thread descended from above and wrapped around her wrist. Then another snaked around her calf, yet another bound her throat, and a fourth around her waist. As they captured her, the threads tangled and became knotted. She stumbled, unable to move due to her bindings. She fell to her knees and tilted her head back and let the light fall on her pale face.
The light expanded, and at the end of each thread, a hand clasped it. Light illuminated their faces. They were ones I recognized, and some I did not. Among them were Sabine and Adair, King Dallin and Queen Idella and Damara, and three people I did not know: a young Neaux woman with cropped hair, an older Neaux woman with coifed hair streaked with grey, and a Neaux man with a pointed beard. They all held tight to the threads and pulled in different directions. Sarelle gasped and clutched at her throat. She looked to me with a pleading expression. Help me, her eyes seemed to say. But I was frozen to the spot, unable to lift a finger to assist her. The threads created a noose in which she was lifted from her feet, dangling like a puppet. My eyes followed the threads upwards. At their source, a hooded figure with a pale white hand held onto them. I gasped and shouted just as it pulled, and the blonde grew still and limp, sagging in her bonds.
“I’ve been waiting for you, illusino,” a melodic voice called to me.
I spun around. At first, I thought it was the first diviner, come to taunt me about a future I could not change. This woman was different. She had long, rippling, black hair that hung loose over her shoulders and down to her waist. She had almond eyes and honey-colored skin. She was my age, maybe a few years my senior.
“Who are you?” I asked.
She smiled. “Come find me, illusino.”
I woke to the morning light spilling into our chamber. Johai had already risen and left me alone. I sat up and drew my knees close to my chest. It was no ordinary dream. I did not often have prophetic dreams; not since I was a girl and had learned to channel my abilities through the scrying dish. However, since the night King Dallin died, I had not scryed; I refused. Nothing good came from my abilities. I knew that without an escape my powers would continue to invade my dreams as they had done this night. There was a message in the tangled threads that had killed Princess Sarelle, for that is who I knew her to be in the light of day. Princess Sarelle was King Dallin’s only daughter and had been a political hostage here in Neaux before her death. What did my dream mean? What was I meant to discover? Who was that woman?
I washed in the cold water set on a table at my bedside and tied my hair back with a bit of ribbon. I avoided looking into the water’s depths, fearful of what I would see there. Sarelle’s death was of no concern to me. I pushed the dream to the back of my mind. I picked one of my less travel-worn gowns that I had stolen in Danhad and dressed quickly. I headed down the stairs. Johai and Beau were in conversation as I approached, and I wondered if they continued to plot to send me away. The inn was crowded and noisy as patrons broke their fasts.
“Good morning, I hope you slept well,” Johai said in a flat tone.
Everything was as it had been, yet my dream set me ill at ease, despite my decision to put it aside. I was in the city in which Princess Sarelle had died. Her death had set much of my path in motion. Had she not died, would I have advised for Sabine’s marriage to Adair? Would Adair have killed his uncle the king to prevent losing his throne? Had she not died, would I still be beside Adair as his foolish puppet? I broke a piece of bread in half and applied some preserves and cream to it. Regardless of the consequences, Sarelle’s death meant nothing to me, I reminded myself.
“I slept fair, I suppose,” I said before I took a bite of the bread. It tasted of ash in my mouth. I set it down, having lost my appetite.
“You should eat,” Johai said with an indifferent tone, though he watched me with a shrewd gaze.
I forced a couple more swallows before giving up on the venture.
Johai reached across the table and put his hand over mine. “Are you feeling ill?”
I shook my head and said the first thing that came to my mind. I did not want to talk about my vision.
Johai removed his hand. “I’m going out to look for work. Beau is going to stay here to protect you.”
“What if someone here recognizes me?” I asked. “Shouldn’t I stay with you in case we need to depart?” I did not like the idea of staying cooped up in my chamber with my thoughts.
Johai shook his head. “They will not look here, and the patrons will not recognize you. I put a spell over the inn.”
I widened my eyes. “Why would you do that!” I shouted and stood up to slam my hands on the table. Sound died in the inn as patrons looked in my direction. I had spoken in Danhadine, so they may not have understood my tongue, but they understood the meaning.
I blushed to my roots and sat back down and bowed my head.
“What choice do we have? You were spotted; they will be looking for you.”
I bit my lip to keep myself from arguing with him. He’s a fool to do this for me. Johai stood up, and the bench he was sitting on scraped across the floor. “I’m heading out.”
I watched him go with guilt and fear coiling in my gut. I pushed my food away, deciding I did not have the stomach to eat after all. I returned to my chamber and sat down heavily on my cot. I heard footsteps on the landing stop outside my door. Beau was playing sentinel.
I did not like to let my mind wander to my past life, but I did, and I thought of all that we had left behind. Sabine—I wondered if she was well; I worried for her health. And Adair, as much as I despised him, I still found my thoughts drawn to him. What would he do if he found me? Kill me, most likely. He would have no further use for me; I knew his secret and for that he would need to kill me, I was certain. I pushed these troublesome thoughts away.
I stood up and went to the window, deciding some fresh air would help calm me down. As I opened the shutters, my eyes were drawn to the street below where a statuesque woman was walking. She had long, black hair that she wore unbound. She wore a loose gown, with bare shoulders. It was different than the style I had s
een most women wear in Neaux.
She turned her head towards me, and our eyes met. She smiled at me before turning and walking down an alleyway. My heart skipped a beat as I stared at the place where she had disappeared. She was the woman from my dream.
My blood thundered in my ears, and I felt an inexplicable draw to find out how she was connected to me. Perhaps she knows how to save Johai. I opened the chamber door, and Beau was outside, leaning against the wall.
“I need to go out for a little while,” I said.
He gave me a bland expression. “Johai said to stay here.”
“I know, but I dreamed of a woman, and I saw her out on the street. I need to go after her; she may hold the key to saving Johai.”
He did not respond right away but continued to give me a blank stare. “Very well, but only for a moment.”
“Thank you!” I exhaled, and I ran down the hall.
Outside, the air was cold though it was still late spring. I had grown up at the base of a mountain range and was used to winds blowing from the mountains, but the cold in Neaux seemed deeper, more chilling to the bone. I almost missed the sweltering summers in Keisan.
Beau stayed close to me, and I made sure to keep my hood pulled forward as to not be recognized. We were approaching the intersection of streets where I had seen the woman. On the corner a tall, clean-cut building with colonnades and a shuttered façade, which was common with Neaux architecture, caught my eye. Double doors facing out onto the street were closed tight. A sign swung from iron filigree above the doors with the words ‘The Dancing Stallion Theatre’ and a crimson horse rearing painted beneath.
A sign on the door read:
Show times:
7 pm nightly
Services to the rear entrance
“She went down this alleyway. Maybe she’s inside the theatre,” I related to Beau.
He nodded and followed me down an alleyway. As I suspected, the alley ended at a brick wall, and on the left hand side, a simple wooden door with a bell hanging from an ironwork arm awaited us. There was no posted sign, but I assumed we were expected to ring the bell.
[fan] diviners trilogy - complete series Page 28