“Conceived while Johai was possessed, she will be powerful in her own right when the time comes.”
The thought both delighted and terrified me. What burden lay before my unborn child? I could only guess. For now I had to focus on the present and the challenge that lay before me.
The priest noticed the princess rocking back and forth on the ground. He held a hand out to her. “Rise, Florian.” Surprisingly, she took his hand and stood.
“What guidance can you give me?” I asked him. The priest knew more than he let on, but I was not the impatient child to demand answers as I had once been.
He gave me another enigmatic smile. “I am only a spectator. I can interfere no more than I already have.”
I frowned. I had hoped for more, but I had come to accept that I must complete this task alone. I was going to ask him another question when a fourth joined our group. Elenna came from the chamber.
“It seems we have all come together at last,” Elenna said as she joined us.
I looked puzzled between Elenna and the priest to Princess Florian, who was muttering under her breath but no longer shouted or rocked. She held onto the priest’s hand, watching us with her wide pale blue eyes.
“You know one another?” I asked Elenna.
Elenna shook her head. Her curtain of dark hair swished back and forth. “We have only just met, but when the Goddess calls, you answer.” She smiled.
We stood facing one another, in a circle beside the fountain. The only sound for a moment was the gurgling of the water and the howl of the wind. The air smelt of rain, and I feared we would be caught in another downpour.
“The time has come,” the priest said at last. “The specter walks, and those who are avatars of the gods have been brought here to stop him.” The priest had his eyes intent on me. “Maea, it is your task to bring the specter to the Sea Chamber. We had thought you were the one meant to bring him beyond the veil, but it seems that your task has changed. You will open the gate as before, but another must lead him through.”
Adair will lead him through, though he does not know it yet. I dared not speak the words aloud, not here; so close to the royal chambers anyone could hear us.
“What roles do you play?” I looked at the three watching me. Elenna smiled without answer. Florian shook her head and muttered under her breath.
It was the priest who spoke. “We are watchers and anchors. We all have roles to play on the final day, which you will learn when the time comes, but not before. The very walls have ears and eyes, and the specter’s touch is everywhere.”
“We will be here to guide you as best we can,” Elenna said, putting a comforting hand on my shoulder. “But when the final task comes, you must do it alone.”
“I understand,” I said. I closed my hands into fists. I must do this to save Johai and my child.
We stood there in a circle for a few more moments, the sound of the wind rushing over us and the hint of salt water tangling in our hair. Princess Florian was still muttering to herself and rocking back and forth again.
“We shall depart for now.” He touched Florian on the elbow.
She looked up at him with her wide panicked eyes. I was surprised she allowed his touch; it seemed she feared everyone but not the priest. This must have something to do with his power.
“Come, you should be back before you are missed.” The priest pushed Florian lightly in the small of her back before turning back to me. “Look for the truth in the lies and the friends within your enemies,” he said as he departed.
He and the princess exited the garden through a hidden doorway in the shrubbery, which I knew led back to Florian’s chamber. The threads of the prophecy seemed to only tangle further. How can I untangle these knots in time?
Chapter Seventeen
He waited five days before coming to me. I had been expecting this visit from the moment Adair had set me free. When we passed each other in the palace halls, when I left my chamber, I felt his eyes watching me, hungry and wanting. The thought of his kiss made my skin crawl, but I would force a smile for his benefit. He sent a messenger early in the day, advising me that he wanted to dine with me. I read the missive over a few times before accepting the truth of it. I knew I would have to face him at some point. I labored over my dress, something too chaste and he would take insult, thinking that I was trying to deter him—because I was—but if I wore something wanton, he would be given the impression that I was willing to take him to my bed. In the end, I decided on the lilac gown Sabine had sent me. My father had gifted me a caul of silver with amethysts tangled up in the wires. Elenna helped me to dress and coiled my hair up into the caul. I stared at the shadow of myself. How much longer can I wear this mask before it devours me whole, I wondered.
When Adair arrived, I was relaxing on the couch in my salon. Elenna led him in. She had deigned to wear a Danhadine gown for the occasion. The dress she wore was cream colored with a simple square neck and full sleeves. It was a wonder they had found something that fit her height. She was much taller than most other Danhadine women.
Adair swept into my salon with a smile. “Lady Diranel.” He bowed to me and came up grinning.
I remember that smile too well. He thinks I will continue to play the canary to his cat. He does not know our roles have reversed. “Your Majesty, I am honored by your visit.” I bowed in return, much lower. I rose up and showed him to a seat near my own.
He leaned back in the chair and accepted a glass of wine from Elenna. She filled the role of servant easily enough. I dared not keep any other staff. They would betray me, I knew. The walls have ears, if what the priest said is true. Adair sipped his wine and looked about the room. He appeared at ease with his surroundings; that much had not changed about him. Yet every gesture and every smile seemed to irritate me as it never had before. I used to adore him. I thought I loved him once. He has not changed at all, but it is me who has changed. I am not the girl who fawned over him.
He smiled, and the corner of his mouth quirked upwards. “I asked you to call me Adair, long ago, in private; you can once more.”
He did not motion to touch me, but I felt his words caress me, trying to lull me back into the place I had been before: devoted to him, willing to give anything to be at his side. You killed that girl when you charged me with the murder you committed. I laughed and took a sip of my wine to hide my disgust.
He was watching me, and I was forced to speak. I set aside my cup. “I was not sure I could, after everything that happened.”
He set down his own goblet. It clinked against the wood of the side table. He stood up and came to join me on my couch. He took my hand in his. I looked up at him through my lashes as he brought my hand to his mouth. His breath was warm against my skin, but it brought to mind hot blood and bodies baking in the sun. I suppressed a shudder of revulsion but only just. I kept my eyes trained on his; they were the same color that Johai’s had been. They were similar but not the same. Adair’s eyes were full of cunning, where Johai’s were full of wisdom.
“Ah, Maea, if I could undo the past, I would. Can you forgive me?”
No. Never. “I know you were left with a difficult decision, and I was so stubborn.” I looked away lest I gag upon my own lies. He traced his thumb across my knuckles. My heart was racing.
“You did not know the true face of Johai then. You were blinded by love for him. I know.”
I turned to face him; my shock was not feigned. When Adair had imprisoned me, I had only just regained my memories of Johai and what had happened before I came to Keisan. At the time I had rejected Adair because he had deceived me not because I had loved Johai more.
“How did you know?” I asked, deciding to play along with his lies.
He chuckled and dropped my hand. “You were not as obvious as him, but I saw the way he watched your every move. He desired you. He would control you if he could. I knew I had to save you from him.”
You picked me because of some quarrel between Johai and you
rself. I was right; Adair was a spoiled child. He had never loved me. He only wanted what he could not have. “I should have seen the truth sooner,” I said and buried my face in my hands. Adair wrapped his arm around my shoulder and brought me close. He held me for a few moments as I pretended to collect my thoughts. “Excuse me. That was unseemly. I should have more control of my emotions.” I dabbed at my imaginary tears.
He grabbed me by the chin and forced me to look him in the eye. I feared my tearless face would give me away, but Adair did not notice or did not care. “I would rather you felt safe enough around me to cry.” He rubbed my chin with his thumb. “I thought I had lost you. When Johai came to make the pact, he said you had perished in the rebellion. I—”
Adair was not able to finish his thought because Elenna had come in to announce dinner was prepared. I silently thanked her good timing. Adair offered me his arm and escorted me into the dining room of my chambers. The table was set for two. The chairs were set at opposite ends. I gave Elenna a grateful smile. She inclined her head, knowing my thoughts. We dined on three courses, starting with a cream soup with scallops and green onions. The second course was a roast duck with oranges and cloves. The final dish was ice with sweet fruit syrup and berries. I found I had little appetite. The nausea was beginning to fade, but my nerves made it hard for me to stomach more than a few bites of each course.
Adair, on the other hand, ate with gusto, complimenting each dish and watching me over his wineglass with the same hungry eyes. When dinner was at an end, we retired once more to the salon. I sat in a single wingback chair by the fire. The fatigue of the day was wearing upon me, and I found my eyes were heavy. Adair sat across from me in the opposite chair. He sat at the edge of his seat. He was close enough to touch, but he still did not try to. Adair did not seem likely to leave any time soon, so I decided to broach a more delicate subject.
“I have heard no new news of Beau’s trial,” I said conversationally.
Adair sat up a bit straighter. “Do not worry. He shall be dealt with soon enough. The council has been focusing on the war.” He balled his hand into a fist on the arm of the chair. I reached over to rest my hand on top of his. He looked up at me.
“Why not show him compassion? He came here to serve you,” I lied. “He is the only reason I was able to escape Johai and come to you.” The lies fell easily from my lips, but unlike my lies of devotion, Adair did not swallow these as readily.
“Compassion can be easily mistaken for weakness as well,” he replied. He took his free hand and sandwiched mine between his. “Let us speak of other things. I do not want to talk of treason and trials.”
He came and kneeled down in front of my chair. He held my hands in his. I looked down upon him. The King of Danhad looked up at me, imploring. I tilted my head to feign ignorance, but I knew what he was preparing to ask me.
“Maea, I want you to be mine, both in spirit and in body. Swear yourself to me and become my mistress. Agree, and I will raise you up to my right hand, and we shall rule Danhad side by side. You will be the wife of my heart.”
I was not surprised by his proposition, but I was surprised by his choice of words, wife of his heart? Was this some line he fed all the empty-headed courtiers who he had warm his bed? What about Sabine, his true wife, who even now prepared to bring their son into the world? What of the son they had made together. Did he care nothing for them?
“It is a generous offer.” I demurred as I looked away from him and into the fire. “I do not know if I am worthy of it.”
He grabbed my chin once more and tilted my head back to face him. “You are all I have ever desired, Maea. When I told you long ago you would have been my chosen bride, I did not lie. I want you like a man dying of thirst craves water, or as a starving man longs for food. When you betrayed me, I thought my heart had been taken from me. I thought I could learn to hate you, to put you aside, but you were never far from my thoughts. You are all I have ever wanted, smart, beautiful, and cunning. We are two of a kind. You and I were meant to be together.”
I wanted to look away, but he had captured me with his intense blue eyes. His words remind me of the specter. The question is, is this the truth? Does he love me? It seemed too preposterous to even consider. I could not speak the words to agree. I need his cooperation. I kissed him. He tensed at first and then opened his mouth to let my tongue explore his. His hands grabbed my shoulders, and I felt as if I might suffocate from want of air. His fingers teased at the buttons of my bodice. I must pull away, stop this now before my body betrayed me. When I closed my eyes, I could almost pretend it was Johai. Then his hand glided over the plane of my stomach and felt the bulge there. It was enough that he paused. He pulled back and looked at me with a puzzled and pained expression.
“I can explain,” I said.
I could see the rage half hidden beneath his seemingly calm gaze. “I think it best that you did.”
“I am with child. She will be a diviner, one of great power, I have been told.” I touched my stomach where my daughter grew within my flesh. She had yet to quicken in the womb, but I could feel her life force there nonetheless, a glowing fire inside me.
“I see.” He kept his hands limp at his side.
His reaction scared me. Will my pregnancy ruin this farce we play? If he realizes she’s Johai’s child, how will he react?
“I feared to tell you. I would have saved myself for you, but…” I left the rest to his imagination. I would rather him think I was taken by force by some brigand than know it was Johai’s child that had begun to grow within me.
He smiled and brought me into his embrace. He smoothed the hair on my head. “I do not blame you. Women can be weak to the temptations of the flesh. Your daughter will be given a place of honor at court, I promise.” It’s too easy. There must be some trap here that I cannot see.
I upturned my face to his. “I want you, but I cannot with good conscience give myself to you with another man’s child within me.” I kissed him again, a chaste touching of lips. He suffered my kiss, and I could feel the tension in his body.
“Of course, I would not expect you to risk the child. A child of such importance must be protected.” He kissed my brow. “There will be time for us, later…” He let the word hang upon the air. I was safe for now but not for much longer.
“What about Beau?” I pressed. I have to secure his safety. He risked too much for me not to do this much at least.
Adair sighed. “I do not know why we must continue to speak of this.” He shook his head. “I will consider his freedom if he swears allegiance to me. He must promise his sword in my defense.”
I kissed him once more, this time on the cheek. He pulled me tight and took a deep lingering kiss, his hand venturing over my breast, which he squeezed. I shouted in surprise. When Adair pulled away, my lips felt bruised and I was panting for breath.
He smirked. “I have prepared a dinner in your honor. You may see a few familiar faces among those that are invited. My dukes and war leaders are gathering. I want them to see you, to know that Danhad is stronger now that we have the greatest prize.” There will be members of the Order of the Oak there. It would be a good time to count Adair’s allies.
I forced a smile. “I look forward to it.”
I went to the tower the next day to convince Beau to bend his knee to Adair. Everywhere I went in the palace, the whispers followed. The courtiers did not trust me. No matter what Adair decreed, they thought me a traitor. Now words like sorceress floated through the air when I entered a room. I had been keeping to myself mostly, but I needed to leave. Elenna came with me, and her clearly foreign appearance only seemed to add flames to the fire of speculation. Today she wore a Biski gown of stone gray with a black border. The hem had dogs, rabbits, foxes and deer gamboling about. She let the whispers roll off her. I tried to do the same, but it hurt to have my countrymen spurn me. Even Sabine refused to return any message I sent to her. I held my head up and ignored them. They did not matter. Winning
Beau’s freedom was paramount. The gaoler was waiting for us at the base of the tower. Adair had given me permission to visit Beau. Once I produced a royal document, we were ushered inside and led up the stairs to Beau’s cell.
My breathing came hard by the time we reached his landing. I leaned against the wall for support as I gulped air. I was not sure when I had gotten so easily fatigued. Elenna told me the child was strong and she sapped my energy. She must have been powerful indeed for the amount of energy I expended just climbing a bit of stairs. As I was standing on the landing, I recalled a vision I had once seen, but the details were fuzzy now. All I could remember was a hand and a door at the end of a long tunnel.
The prison guard let us through to where Beau was being kept. Metal clinked as he extracted the correct key and inserted it into the lock. We were given a short amount of time to speak with Beau. The door swung open with a creak. Elenna and I stepped into the dimly lit chamber. It was not as well furnished as my own cell had been. But there was a table and a fireplace.
When the door closed behind us, the slam echoed off the stone walls of Beau’s cell. Beau was sitting beneath the single slit window, his back against the wall and his head tilted backwards so light fell on his face. The light coming through was hazy. Outside it was a cloudy day that threatened rain. He glanced over at me.
“You look well,” he said.
I could not say the same for him. His beard had grown out thick and black. His hair was in tangles, and his clothes appeared stained. “Adair has told me that if you are willing to bend your knee, he will let you go free. He wants you to swear your life and your sword to him. If you do, he will spare your life.”
He stared at me in silence for a very long time. “To what end?”
His question was unexpected. I thought he would be pleased to know I had found a way to free him. “What do you mean? To live!”
He turned to look away from me, and his face was cast in shadow. “I have nothing left to live for.”
[fan] diviners trilogy - complete series Page 79