That was the first time in my life that what I had strived and studied for so long had become a big question mark. I used to listen to Dad talking about his cases and think that would be me when I was older.
That was then. Right now, helping Rogue would maybe give me a sense of that. The bitch that blew away my dad got out three years after she had gunned him down in front of the courthouse. Even though it was ten years ago, it still felt like only yesterday.
As we rode to my apartment, the pair of us were quiet. I didn’t know what to say to him. Some part of me felt like a bitch for blurting to Rogue in the diner about Richard. The other part was glad that I had told him the truth. Rogue had come out of jail for five minutes and already he was up to his old tricks.
I thought jail was supposed to help criminals.
Make them see the error of their ways so they would come out and not want to commit crime again. Then again, the national department statistics said otherwise. Over half of them committed another crime in the first year.
Shit, I had to put my personal feelings aside and just think of Mom. She was going through hell. Richard was completely different from my dad. He was friendlier, worked a hell of a lot less, and paid her attention. It was clear from the time they both kept bumping in the coffee shop and she introduced him to me that they were going to get married. I just didn’t expect it in the first year of them dating, and I certainly didn’t think that the basketball hero that they used to talk about was his son.
History had a funny way of repeating itself. And not in a good way. Richard was our sports coach. He was going to be professional, but like his son, he was injured. The only difference was he decided to continue and go to college to help other kids. He never became bitter and twisted about his injury like his son.
The mood in the car was sterile. I turned on the radio to try and change the mood. Every time I turned to look at Rogue from the corner of my eye, he was just staring out of the window. As if he was on a different planet.
As if he didn’t want to be here. Luckily, it was a short drive to my apartment.
I buzzed to get into my apartment’s garage and parked the car. Rogue had never been to my place. I had some of his stuff in his room that his dad managed to get out of his old place. During the last few years, we’d hardly seen each other, let alone spoken, so this was going to be tough. Thoughts about telling him that we were here and he could get out of the car as I parked were erased as I parked the car. Rogue got out in silence.
He didn’t know where I lived or anything.
Yet, he never asked any questions.
I got out of the car and headed toward the elevators and he followed me like a lost sheep. As I pressed the button to go upstairs, I looked at his face one more time and I could see that Rogue simply didn’t care where we were. Tears were swelling in his eyes. I didn’t have to explain that this was my place.
This was going to be tougher than I thought.
I didn’t think Rogue had feelings.
Now, I could see that he had a whole heap of them.
Chapter Four
Rogue
I wanted to say something. Anything to break the fucking ice. But the thought of my dad dying just brought it all home. I shook my head as we got into the elevator. Not only because I felt like I was on the way to the funeral home, but because I couldn’t bear the silence any longer.
That was when my phone started to buzz. As the doors closed, it stopped. I didn’t need to look at it to know that there could only be one person calling: Kathleen.
“Have you lived here long?” I turned to ask Claire. I was moving in with her whether we both liked it or not. We would have to get along. Small talk seemed to be the only way to break the ice.
That was when it dawned on me that I would be staying in this block. I remembered thinking as we drove through downtown that Claire’s apartment would be most likely on Hoover Avenue.
Not sure why I thought that?
After all, we were practically strangers. Since she graduated from law school, we had never seen each other. Well, part of that was because I had been in a cell and the other part was because I’d been too busy trying to score big time on the roulette wheel.
Our parents got married and then I got a job working at a coffee shop. It didn’t take long for me to get bored of that. Dad kept going on about me finding myself. Basketball was no longer my life and I had so much potential. He said that working in a job that wasn’t stressful for a year would be a good break, and it might encourage me to go to college. Even if it was just community college.
He was wrong.
I wanted more. So much fucking more. I just didn’t want to work for it. Poker used to be my thing. I used to win big time, but then I used to lose big time too. The stakes got too high, and once you hang around a certain circuit, unless you have the dough to keep it up, you pretty much get kicked to the side.
Unlike the wheel.
That one was just pure luck.
There was no mechanism or thought process on how to win roulette. It’s either red or black. Pick a lucky number and your game’s set for the night.
“Four years.”
Wow, she must be making some top dollars to be living here. As we went through the hallway and I followed her, unsure if she was turning left or right, I had to ask the question as she opened her door.
“So, do you rent or did you buy?”
She laughed as she stepped in and dropped her bag on a chair that was by the doorway.
“Wouldn’t you like to know?”
Wow, Claire could actually smile. Until now, I’d thought that it was going to be difficult and she would continue to give me the cold shoulder. But that smile. It actually made me feel at ease.
As soon as she stepped in she took off her heels and let out a sigh of relief as she dumped her shoes right next to the refrigerator. The uptight Claire seemed to turn into a relaxed one in her own home. I wished I felt the same. I waited for her to tell me where my room was, or the rules on our staying together.
She surprised me when she said, “Want a beer?”
I nodded.
I was speechless.
Claire drank beer.
Maybe this wasn’t going to be as bad as I’d thought it would be. Claire inside her apartment was completely different from the uptight one that I’d met a few years ago. After all, she had beer and even though I shouldn’t be drinking anymore, I found that I didn’t need to indulge like I did when I was gambling. I didn’t need it to make me feel brave, I just wanted it once in a while to cool me down and take the edge off like right now.
Chapter Five
Claire
“What?” I snarled at Rogue as he stood still as if he was frozen in time. He stared at me as if I was a ghost.
I drink beer.
I take my shoes off when I get home.
Get over it.
It didn’t take a genius to guess what was going through his mind. It was written all over his face. Then again, in my profession we were trained to study body language. That way we knew what type of client we were dealing with and knew whether it was a high risk to take them on from the start.
“Sure,” he sighed as he awoke from his trance. “Pass it over.”
He was the only guy that I had ever had in my apartment. Not that I was a virgin. Just that this was a haven that I had never crossed the line on and let a guy enter. I had always felt if I did go down that road and let them in then they would know the real me.
The me I kept hidden.
Even from myself.
I walked slowly toward him and thought about this big bad boy. He had emerald eyes and dark hair, and when he took off his jacket, I saw he had a body full of tattoos. I started to wonder about his secrets. Rogue had felt like an open book until now.
When I told him that his dad was sick, that was the first time that I realized Rogue might actually have a heart.
“Come in. After all, this is your home too.” The word
s escaped my mouth and it felt weird saying them. It was one thing to sign and agree for him to live here. It was another thing actually doing it. Making it real.
I encouraged him to walk to the living room. I didn’t want to lead him to his room yet. His things were in there waiting for him. Call me crazy, but at that precise moment in time, the only thing I wanted to do was chat.
“Sure.”
He looked like a lost boy as he tried to figure out where to put his jacket.
“Put it on the hook.” I pointed.
He seemed out of place, like a dancer with two left feet, as he put his jacket on the hook and came into the salon part of the open-plan apartment.
“This is nice.”
I turned to look at him. I couldn’t figure out if he was talking about the apartment or having a beer. As I slouched on my sofa, I realized as his eyes never left mine, and that he was referring to me.
“Are you just going to sit there and stare?” I said boldly as I sat up and thought about getting the ground rules out in the open, before his fingers did what his eyes were doing to me right now.
He needed to act as if we were strangers. People who were in the same apartment but meant nothing to each other. Yet, as he cleared his throat and moved to the edge of the sofa, I had a suspicion that it was going to be harder for me than for him.
"Stare," he growled as he moved closer to me. He had been in jail too long. He didn’t want me. He just wanted someone to fuck. That was why he had called Kathleen. He knew he was coming to stay with me. He knew that I was going to pick him up. Why call her?
Cause he was desperate.
Rogue had never paid any attention to me.
Like, never ever.
Even when our parents got married, we’d hardly exchanged words. I’d tried to converse with him a few times, but he was working in a coffee shop and we just had nothing in common. Apart from the fact he made me wet as soon as he walked in the door.
My friends used to tease me about my hot stepbrother. We never had a conversation. Shit, what were we supposed to talk about? My time in college—the place Richard said that Rogue used to dream about going to play professional basketball? Or about law? The only thing Rogue was interested in when he started hitting the casinos was breaking the law. There was a sexual chemistry. But it was always one-sided.
His lips.
His thick body.
Shit, they used to turn me on. He was just out of jail, though. He should have been a complete turn off. Yet, for some reason, he was making me hot. Just like he used to when we first met. I needed a distraction. Something to make me think of something else.
Anything!
While my eyes shifted, trying to stay away from the hot, red-blooded man that was stripping off my clothes with his eyes, my phone rang, and like a cat in heat, I jumped up to pick it up. Normally, I would let it ring, but the way he was looking at me, the feeling that I had inside of me, meant that I needed to move quickly. Away from his body that was drawing closer to mine.
I could hear him sigh with disappointment as I left his side. I pretended I didn’t know what was going on as I grabbed my phone from my bag.
"What?" I screamed as I turned my back to him. I didn't want to see his hungry eyes. This couldn’t happen. I was supposed to let him stay to put him on the straight and narrow. Not to satisfy his withdrawal symptoms from being in the slammer for so long.
"Did you find him? Are you okay?"
It was Mom. Shit, I forgot to call and tell her that I found him and that all was okay.
"Yes, we're at home. How's Richard? Okay?” I quickly changed the subject, before she asked me what was going on with Rogue.
She paused while clearing her throat. I should have turned around. If I had, then I would've known what Rogue was up to. I was too busy trying to avoid him. I felt his hand around my waist.
"Sure, honey. Do you know when you guys are coming over?"
He bit on my earlobe ever so gently. Shit, why were my legs not moving away? Because it felt so good. Too good being in his arms.
I whispered, "Just going to freshen up and we’ll leave soon."
I didn't wait for her to reply. I dropped my phone and it slammed against the wooden floor. I could have broken it, but I didn’t care as he started to suck on my neck. I could have denied him. Told him to stop. But, who was I kidding?
He wanted me.
And I wanted him more.
***
I ran my fingers through his hair. He caressed my butt roughly, just the way I liked it. Even without any past experience of being in my bed, Rogue knew the buttons to press. The way to make me wet. The same man I hated a few minutes ago was becoming the one that I was lusting for.
It was as if his life depended on it, as if he knew I needed to be held with firmness and desire.
One yank and he took off my panties under my skirt. Wetness rushed between my pussy walls as he whispered my name between our kisses.
I had always thought about his thick lips against mine, but I hadn’t imagined he would taste so good.
Secret fantasies were always that.
The exception.
The ones that would turn out to be better than the real thing.
That was what had happened to me in the past, which was why I gave up on sex. It wasn’t as satisfying as I thought it would be.
A hot guy.
You fancy him and he fancies you.
That’s what happened one time, but when we had sex, it was nothing like this. There was no urgency. No dying for him to get his cock in. It just happened and then after that I swore off it. I never regretted it until now.
Being with Rogue, even just kissing, made me anticipate having his cock inside me more than any fantasy.
Our tongues rushed in and out of each other’s mouths. He used one hand to release his cock, and then pressed against me.
He inhaled a deep breath. Then, he held my arms above my head with one hand and used the other to push his hardness into me. I gasped for air, and then I cried out his name, “Rogue!”
Holding my butt, he thrusted his hips. I tried to steady myself with my arms so I wouldn’t drop as he pressed me against the door. He looked deep into my eyes as he moved closer to me, watching my reaction as he plunged his lips down to mine.
Probably waiting for me to tell him to stop.
This was wrong.
We were stepbrother and sister.
He had just come out of jail.
I was a lawyer, a respected one.
Not some girl that loved a bit of rough.
“What are you waiting for?” I growled, wanting him to know that I needed this.
Maybe it was lust. Sometimes I’d wondered if Rogue had gone to college, if he had become a professional player, would things have been different between us? Would we have had conversations where we could relate to each other?
One thing was for sure.
He never would have touched drugs. Never played at the casinos and if he did. Then, it would be with his own money. Maybe like all the other players, he would have had women crawling at his feet, but would he have paid them as much attention as he does now?
After we finished, after he fucked me, the curiosity would stop. I would no longer crave his touch, want his lips against mine, and most importantly, want his cock in my pussy.
“Are you sure about this?” he questioned. He looked taken aback, as if he was about to change his mind.
I couldn’t believe it. He wasn’t totally careless —he had a fucking heart. Feelings. Emotions. All the things that I never knew he possessed. It was having the reverse effect on me.
I should have seen him as being weak and run a mile.
Yet, I was so damn wet. A few minutes ago, I felt angry and confused. Until, I looked into his eyes and realized that I was kidding myself. There was only one thing I wanted, and that was him.
I nodded without hesitation, washing away the fear about what would happen after we had sex. The next th
ing I knew, our hot bodies were next to each other as he pumped me against my front door.
“Don’t stop.”
He moved his butt slightly back and then with so much force, he thrust inside of me. I cried so damn loud.
Fuck the neighbors.
I didn’t care who heard me. Right now I was in my apartment having the life fucked out of me by Rogue.
I was close to the edge when he changed his rhythm and slowed down. With every jerk, I cried out with joy. He rocked backward, then plunged into my pussy, even deeper inside. I welcomed it.
This wasn’t love. Just a fuck. Nothing more. All these years I had been secretly frustrated because I wanted Rogue. I knew that being in the slammer for nearly three years did things to a guy. Which was why he’d tried hooking up with Kathleen.
So, what did that mean for us?
Was I just a pussy?
The subconscious part of me wanted the answers to the questions. But the more he thrust inside of me and the closer I got to the edge, the only thing that was on my mind was coming.
“Fuck me harder!” I yelled as I reached the brink of my orgasm.
I screamed in frustration as he reduced his pace, making it slower and shallower. He smiled, knowing I was seriously aching. My clit was calling out for his touch, for relief only he could give.
He finally picked up speed, moving faster and rocking into me even more. Every time he pumped, I yelled, begging him to pound harder into me until I felt his come shoot up my spine, and we both cried out as we came.
We panted, and he released my hands. I tried to tidy myself up with as much dignity as I could find. He pulled up his zipper. Shit, why was I getting turned on so much when it was not what we were supposed to be doing? I nearly forgot the whole reason I was here in the first place as he held my hand and pulled me in the direction of my bedroom.
Rogue wanted more.
I should have tugged on his hand and told him that it was enough.
But when he said, “Where’s the bedroom?”
I found myself replying, “This way.” I took the lead to do everything to him that I had secretly fantasized. And I knew by the performance just now, it would put my secret fantasy to shame.
Bad Apple_A Stepbrother Romance Page 2