Sam looked at his bicep and frowned. His dad stood before him and spread his feet wide. He was a tall man, still solid, with thick arms and thick legs. And he was quick with his hands, able to pick a fly out of the air or slap his mother so fast that she never saw it coming. Sam watched his father, a sinking feeling in his chest.
“Can you take care of yourself?” Jody demanded in a sour voice.
Sam looked away before he answered, then quickly recognized his mistake. He turned back to his father and stared him in the eye, trying to hide any fear. “I do OK,” he answered defiantly.
His dad snorted angrily. He knew better.
“I can’t teach you a whole lot, boy, but I can teach you how to fight. And there’s only one way to learn. Just like with swimming, you’ve got to jump into the pool. And not on the kiddie side, you need to jump in over your head. So I’m going to help you, Sammy, and one day you’ll thank me for this.”
Sam looked at his father, his eyes wide. The older man took a short step toward him, a shadow passing over his face. He was six inches taller and weighed at least a hundred pounds more. “You’re going to need to know how to do this!” Jody explained as he lifted his fist. “There’s only one way to learn. It’s time to jump in, Sammy. And I ain’t the kiddie pool.”
Sam stumbled backward. “No, Dad!” he cried.
The old man moved forward. “No son of mine will be a coward!” he sneered.
*******
Jody beat his son so severely that he knocked him unconscious. Stepping over the crumpled body, he dragged him under a tree, then turned back to the boat and started slapping on the paint.
Sam came to later on. He lay there a long time, trying to clear his head, then forced himself to his feet, washed from the hose and stumbled into the house.
His dad eyed him warily, then slapped him on the back. “You’ll learn,” he said as if they were old friends. “You’ve got to keep your hands up to cover your face. And you’ve got to bulk up, you’ve got the muscles of a fly. I’m not asking that you be a jock like I was, heaven knows there’s no hope of that, but I won’t raise a kid who can’t take care of himself. And I bloody sure won’t have a son who is afraid of a fight.”
Sam only grunted.
“This is for your own good. I’m not raising a woman. I’m raising a man!”
“You’re not raising me!” Sam cried as he backed away from his dad.
Jody froze as if he had taken a sucker punch. “Bloody straight I’m raising you,” he sneered, reaching out slap him again. “I am your old man! And don’t you ever forget it! I gave up everything just to have you, without nothin’ in return. This is a tough world, don’t I know it, and I’m gonna teach you to survive.”
Sam stared at him and nodded.
The old man was probably right.
*******
“What happened!” Sara blurted when he drug himself into the house, her hand shooting to her mouth.
“Fell off the boat,” Samuel lied as he held a rag to his split lip. Neither Sara nor Neil believed him, but he wouldn’t say any more. They considered calling the authorities, but they knew Sam would never forgive them, for he followed a code of silence when it came to the old man.
That night, as Sam lay on his bed, his entire body screaming, he made a decision. His old man wanted him to learn how to fight. Then by hell, that’s what he’d do.
Next day he spent every dime he had on a set of weights and started pumping iron. He started working out with the boxing coach and running five miles a day.
Six weeks later, the old man took notice. “See there, boy, I’m helping you already,” he said as he thumped Sam on the chest. “Feel that,” he mocked. “The kid is building a six-pack of his own. Well, let’s see what he’s got now!” Jody peeled off his shirt and flexed his biceps.
Sam held his ground. His eyes were unafraid. “I don’t want to fight you anymore, Jody. You made your point, OK. I got it. I learned my lesson. Now let’s just let it go at that.”
“Who knows if you’ve learned anything? You ain’t proved nothing yet!”
“No one says we have to do this!”
His old man took a quick step forward and spit on the ground.
The fight only lasted eight seconds. Three hits; a right to the midsection, just above the kidneys, a left to the jaw which broke a back tooth, then a right to the eyebrow that sent his old man’s brain rattling in his skull. It was over and his father went down. He was flat on his back, his eyes open, his jaw gapping up and down like a fish. Sam went to the hose and turned it on to soak the old man.
“You satisfied?” he sneered as his father shook his wet head.
His old man nodded, his eyes unfocused, his breathing coming in grunts.
“Have I passed your stupid little test then?”
The old man grunted again.
Sam leaned down to face him, looking into his bleary eyes. “Then let me tell you something, Jody. You touch me again, and I’ll kill you! You understand that. I don’t want to fight you. Not ever again. But if you come after me, I promise, you won’t wake up in this world. And the same goes for Momma. You touch her, and I’ll find you. So grow up, old man.”
Sam threw the hose down and walked away. He left his dad sputtering and never looked back again.
That night he locked himself in his room, refusing to speak to anyone. He ignored Sara’s gentle knocks on the door as he cried into his pillow.
He knew it was time to start over. Really start over. Screw the old man and old lady. It was time to move on.
He had a chance at another life, a chance to do something more. He had a chance to be normal. A chance to make something of his life, a chance to do something besides drink beer, watch football and look for another party or the next sleazy lover who could provide a few thrills.
From that day forward he quit thinking of his biological parents as his mom and dad. Sara and Neil were his parents, the only true parents he would ever have. And he loved them with an emotion that could only be borne from the depths of despair, a depth of loyalty which came from a man who had been thrown a lifesaver in a sea of loneliness and fear. And he knew that they loved him too. Why they did, he didn’t know. It was a great mystery, something he would never understand. But they really did love him, they weren’t just saying the words. And they had saved him from a life of constant bitterness and self-inflicted wounds.
So despite the court’s directions, it was almost a year before he saw Jody or his mom again.
*******
Sam continued to work out every day. He grew strong and fast. And he also grew smart. His senior year of high school, he went from a struggling C and B student to making almost straight As. He tried out for football and became a star running back.
“I’m too much like my real dad,” he once said to Sara as they sat at the kitchen counter after one of his football games.
She looked at him a long time. “Who is your real dad?” she asked.
Sam looked away guiltily. “I’m sorry,” he said. “What I meant was my biological father. I saw him at the game tonight. He used to play football, too. I’m too much like him.” He stared at his tight hands.
Sara’s eyes softened. “You were given a bad deal, Sammy, there’s no way around that. But I really think that it’s not so much the hand we’ve been dealt that matters as much as what we do with our cards. We have to play the best game; play the best way we know how, and that’s what you’ve done, Sammy. Your dad and I are proud. We’re as proud of you as any person we’ve ever known.”
*******
During his senior year in high school, Sam and Jody seemed to patch things up a bit and he started hanging out at the old home on the weekends every once in a while. His mom came back from las Vegas and took a few steps to clean up her life. She and Jody got back together and they settled down in the old house on the bay and took to the slow life. They expanded their business, taking it seriously for the first time. She drove the boat. Jody ran ta
ckle and cleaned the client’s fish. Both of them attended Sam’s high-school graduation. They even gave him a present—a hundred dollars cash and a pair of black leather Italian shoes. Sam held them up, the soft leather shining in the afternoon sun, then looked at his dad.
“One day, you’re going to be someone,” his old man explained. “You’re gonna need to look good. And a good look starts with the right shoes.”
It was one of the happiest moments of Sam’s life.
*******
Sam stayed with the Brightons for six weeks after graduating from high school, a period of discontent and frustration. But Neil and Sara didn’t push him, knowing Sam just needed a little time to sort things out. He spent much of his time wandering around the house, reading in his bedroom or puttering in the garden. And though Sam had always loved working with the earth, even this seemed to cause him frustration. He frequently commented on how he was planting seeds that he wouldn’t be around to see grow.
One afternoon Sara walked into her bedroom to see him standing in front of the mirror wearing one of Neil’s suits. The leather shoes Jody had given him shined under the loose cuff of the pants. He turned from side to side, looking at himself in the mirror, Sara watching him with pride. “Wow, you look great,” she said as he adjusted the tie. “There is something about a suit. You really look good.”
He looked a second longer, then shook his head. “I don’t think so, Mom. It feels too tight.”
Sara walked to him and tugged on the shoulders. “It fits you just right.”
He looked at her and smiled. “That’s not what I meant,” he answered. “But thanks anyway.” He disappeared into his bedroom to change out of the suit.
Sara understood what he was saying, so she waited until he was dressed. “What are you going to do then, Sam?” she asked when he reappeared from his room.
He hesitated, and for an instant she saw a young child there; a thirteen-year old boy, small, beaten by circumstances. She saw all the misery and anguish of the past years. But she couldn’t change that. It was now up to Sam to decide what he was going to do.
“I’m sorry,” Sam muttered, “I know you and Dad want me to go to college. Get a degree in business or go to law school or something. But I can’t do it, Mom. Maybe I’m just a bad seed. Maybe I don’t have it in me. Look at my old man, and I think we’d agree there’s not a lot to be optimistic about. I want to be like you and Dad, but I’m just like my old man instead.”
Sara felt her chest crunch. She remained speechless, her throat tight. “You are who you choose to be,” she told him.
The way that Sam looked at her indicated he didn’t know if that was true.
“What are you going to do then?” she asked again.
Sam clenched his jaw. He had made his decision the night before. “My old man taught me to fight,” he answered. “That’s something I’m pretty good at. I guess that’s what I’ll do.”
“Neil will be disappointed that you don’t go to college so you can be an officer.”
“Yeah. I understand that. But that’s the way it is, I guess.”
*******
Six weeks later Sam left for army basic training. Twelve weeks after that, he graduated number one in his class. He was indeed a fighter. Very good at his job. Upon graduation, he was accepted to Rangers school and once again finished in the top of his class. He was then assigned to the 101st Airborne and eventually sent to Afghanistan to fight the remnants of the Taliban and al Qaeda.
Two years after joining the Army, Sam received a hand-delivered invitation from his unit commander. He opened it eagerly. He had been waiting for months.
The invitation was short and direct. The Delta Force, the U.S. Army’s elite counterterrorism experts, were looking for a very few men. Did he want to apply? Sam stared at the invitation. A shot of adrenaline ran through him and he almost jumped in the air.
Delta Force are the crème de le crème, the most disciplined and highly trained soldiers in the world. They are part of the U.S. Army Special Operations Forces, and they conduct covert missions that were so highly controversial and dangerous that many of the team members had long hair and wore civilian clothes as they roamed around with CIA agents in the hellish spots of the world.
Fifty of the army’s very best men, those who had already proven themselves on the battlefield, would be invited to Delta training. Three, maybe five, would make it through.
Sam was one of the proud ones. Neil attended the low-key graduation, smiling proudly from his VIP seat. Sara wasn’t allowed to attend, but it didn’t matter, she would have only cried anyway.
Sam then spent a hellish twenty months crawling through the spider web of caves that lined the eastern Afghanistan border, hunting down and killing various enemies of the United States. During this time he finished college, getting a degree in International Relations, with a minor in Arabic and Urdu. Again, he graduated with honors. Then came a commission as an officer, a thing which made the general very proud.
EIGHTEEN
Five minutes after placing his order, Neil’s adopted son walked through the door.
Samuel had put on weight, twenty pounds, all of it muscle in his shoulders and arms. His hair had grown long and sun-bleached and it hung in bangs in his eyes and over his ears. And he was tan, almost dark, from the vicious Afghani sun. Brighton noted his goatee, which was so tightly trimmed it was barely a shadow of stubble. Dressed in dark jeans, a tan T-shirt and leather hiking boots, he looked more like a European than an American. He certainly didn’t look army and though Brighton knew the Delta’s often worked undercover, as a traditional soldier it was a little unsettling. He expected a GI Joe in a tight haircut and USA T-shirt. What he saw was a Hell’s Angel who has just slipped off his Hog.
But these were the new warriors. And he thought that it was cool. He stared a proud moment then stood and waved to his son.
Sam picked him out and moved through the crowd toward his table. Brighton stood to embrace him and they slapped each other on the back before they sat down. “Sam, it’s good to see you!” Brighton said in delight.
“No kidding! This is great. How are you, Dad?”
“A little nervous, actually.”
“Why’s that?” Sam cocked his head.
“I was only scheduled for a 40 minute refueling stop at Ramstein,” Brighton answered. “I didn’t think I’d have time to get together with you, but your mother was so determined that I see you, I’m thinking she snuck onto base and sabotaged my aircraft before I took off. Now I’m wondering what else she might have done. Is my airplane safe anymore?”
Both of them laughed then stared at each other, a proud father and proud son. “You look good,” Brighton offered, “but I’ve got to tell you, that isn’t what I have come to expect from a soldier.”
Sam pushed his hair back. “Welcome to the Deltas. This is how it is now.”
Brighton pointed to the long hair and rough clothes. “They wouldn’t let our Air Force guys get away with that,” he answered.
“Your boys jet around like Space Rangers. They don’t play down in the mud with the men.”
“I guess not.”
“And remember, Dad, we have to work with the locals. It helps us to blend in, which is a good thing.”
Brighton nodded. He knew that. “Things in Afghanistan OK?” he asked.
“Doing good, doing good.”
His father leaned toward him intently. “Really?” he asked.
“Well, Dad, I’m not really sure what you want me to say. For one thing, you’re a senior member of the president’s national security staff. Anything I say could be used against me. I’m not going go there, know what I mean. If you want information on operations in Afghanistan, I refer you to my commander, General Brighton, sir.”
Brighton cracked a thin smile. “OK, Captain Brighton. Duly noted. Now, just between you and me, how are things going in Afghanistan?”
“It’s a hole. Hot. Dusty. Too many idiots who hate the Unit
ed States. Too many donkeys and not enough rain. The whole country smells like an outhouse in the summer. Chiggers and sand fleas. What more do you want to know.”
Brighton shook his head. “I’m sorry,” he said.
“Sorry! Are you kidding? I wouldn’t have it any other way! I can’t wait to get back there. It’s a miserable and lousy mission, but we’re killing more of the enemy than any other unit in the world. We’re shooting out the brains of those guys bent on destroying their own country and killing their own people. So no, I’m not complaining, I’m just doing my job.”
“You should have listened to me. You could have gone to the Academy and learned to fly jets.”
“And miss getting shot at while taking a piss over the side of an eighteen thousand foot cliff? Why would I ever do that?”
Brighton shrugged. “What was I thinking?” he answered sarcastically.
“And remember, Dad,” Sam continued, his emotion on the rise, “these guys don’t just want to destroy us in some vague or ambiguous way. They want to kill us. To hurt us. To cause us any kind of pain. Give any one of them a dull knife and they’d happily cut your head off, all the time laughing while they hacked away. Give them a nuke and they’d take out D.C. in a heartbeat, smiling and laughing while counting a million people dead. And if anyone doesn’t believe that then I think them a fool. If they’d seen what I’ve seen, then they wouldn’t have any doubt.”
“Hey Sammy, you’re preaching to the choir here.”
Sam quit talking, but even in the dim light his blue eyes burned bright. Brighton lifted his water and tilted it toward him. “I’m proud of you, Sam.”
Sam lifted his Perrier. “Thank you, general,” he said.
*******
The five Germans watched the two American soldiers intently while sipping their ale. They were all in their thirties and had missed most of the U.S. glory days. More, they considered Miss Lelas a local joint, off limits to the American riffraff, and they thought that had been made abundantly clear from the old BUSH IS HITLER poster hanging near the front door. And if that didn’t do it, the upside down British flag over the bar should have made their feelings clear.
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