“You can’t imagine the levels of pleasure you can attain when you give yourself over to your true desires.” His voice softened. “Or maybe, after last night, you have an idea.”
I shifted in my seat. I knew what he meant. The orgasms I’d experienced during our time together yesterday were like nothing I’d ever felt before.
“As for your first question,” he continued. “It’s a complicated answer because there are so many aspects to BDSM that it can’t be looked at too broadly.”
I nodded as if I understood what he was saying when, in reality, I had no clue. Fortunately, he explained himself.
“I’m a dominant person, Carrie. It’s part of my personality. I like to be the one initiating the action.” He grinned suddenly. “Though I have to admit, I have liked it when you’ve started things.”
I smiled back, the tension in my body easing slightly.
“But, for the most part, when I’m having sex, I want to be the one deciding how things go,” he continued. “That doesn’t always mean the same thing, though. I don’t have to be... bossy. I can feel in control even when I’m asking what you want.”
“And the spanking?” I had to ask the question. Domination was one thing. I’d already decided that I liked it, and knowing how he viewed dominating me made me feel much more relaxed about it. The B, S, and M part of BDSM, however, still worried me.
Gavin turned back towards me. “I’m not hardcore, if that’s what you’re worried about.” His tone was gentle. “What I do like are the things that intensify sensation, that take what a person could think of as mildly painful and convert them into pleasure. When it’s done right, spanking can be as arousing as oral sex, and not just for the dominant.”
My breathing quickened. He’d started using the same voice he used when he was telling me all the things he wanted to do to me. My body couldn’t help but respond.
“I promise you, I’ll never do anything you aren’t comfortable with,” he said. “But I’d be lying if I said I hadn’t been thinking about some of the things I’d love to introduce you to.”
I reached for my bottle of water, my mouth dry.
“I want to tie you to the bed and use a flogger on all those delicate little bits until you climax.”
Fuck. My eyes widened.
He reached forward and gently cupped my breast, brushing his thumb over my nipple and making it harden under the fabric of my dress.
“I want to use clamps on your nipples, show you the edge of pleasure and pain.”
My nipples throbbed, as if I could already feel the pinch of rubber or metal.
His hand moved up to the base of my neck and his fingers played with a few loose curls there.
“I want to use all sorts of toys on you, make you orgasm again and again until you beg me to stop. There are so many things I want to do to you, for you. Take you to heights that will leave you gasping for air.” He sat back, taking his hand with him. “But I meant what I said, Carrie. I’ll never ask you to do anything you don’t want to do, and I’ll never hold it against you. No matter what we’re doing, as long as we’re together, I’m happy.”
He picked his fishing pole up again and settled back in his seat. I watched him for a moment before doing the same. The conversation was over. I’d gotten my answers. I trusted him to do as he promised, but now I needed to decide how far I truly wanted to go. It was a lot to think about.
Chapter 11
We enjoyed the rest of our afternoon on the yacht, but it had ended up being more quiet and thoughtful than I’d originally anticipated. As we headed back in, my thoughts turned away from my conversation with Gavin to the upcoming party. I’d have been lying if I’d said I wasn’t nervous.
“Are you okay?” Gavin’s voice was soft.
He was standing behind me, but not touching me. He hadn’t touched me since we’d had our little talk, but I could tell it was his way of giving me space. We had jumped into this relationship with both feet, and there was still so much that we didn’t know about each other.
I took a step back, closing the distance between us. When I leaned back against him, I heard him sigh. His arms slid around my waist and he put his cheek on the top of my head.
“I was worried I’d scared you off,” he admitted.
“Not a chance.” I put my hands on his arms. “I still don’t know what or how far I’m willing to go, but I’m not running away.”
His arms tightened around me. “Is that all that’s got you so quiet?”
I shook my head. “I’m nervous about the party. You said it was even fancier than the gala, and that was the fanciest thing I’d ever been to.” I paused, then admitted the whole truth: “I don’t want to disappoint you.”
“You never disappoint me.” The words were fierce. “Never.”
A thrill went through me. I’d told him something similar when he’d planned an elaborate dinner date on the roof of his building, complete with three men playing strings. Now I knew that he felt the same way.
“I did think you might be a bit apprehensive,” he said. “So I booked a make-up artist and a hairdresser to help you get ready. They’re meeting us at Howard’s and they’ll make sure you’re every bit as stunning as I know you can be.”
“Thank you,” I said. My anxiety started to leak away.
“Not that I think you need make-up or a gown to be beautiful,” he added. His voice dropped. “Seeing you standing in front of me last night, nothing covering that amazing body... You took my breath away.”
I closed my eyes. I wasn’t sure how to respond to that. Another “thank you” seemed so inadequate.
“Then again…” His words took on a teasing note. “I don’t want anyone else to see you that way, so a gown and all the trimmings will be the way to go for the party.”
I laughed. I understood what he meant. He looked good – better than good – in his tux, but he looked even better without it. That wasn’t a sight I wanted to share with anyone else.
“After the party, though,” he continued, “I want to get you out of that dress and into bed.”
I could hear a note of uncertainty and knew where he was coming from. For all he knew, I wouldn’t want to have sex with him until I figured this whole kink thing out. I didn’t have that kind of self-control when it came to him. I’d make sure we didn’t go any further than I was comfortable, but I wasn’t about to cut him off completely.
“That sounds wonderful,” I said. “Any chance we can cut out early?”
He laughed, and the sound sent vibrations through me. I loved that sound. It was strange, I thought, how pretty much everything about my relationship with Gavin had been completely ass-backwards from how I usually did things, but the connection I had with him was stronger than anything I’d ever felt before. I should’ve been questioning it, second-guessing myself for falling so hard and so fast, but I pushed all the negative aside. I’d made my choice. I was with Gavin. It didn’t matter how it had happened, only that we belonged together.
I was a little disappointed when we arrived back at the mansion and Gavin said he wouldn’t be staying with me to get ready, but I went with one of Howard’s staff, who showed me to the bedroom Gavin and I would be sharing. It wasn’t as big as the suite back at the hotel, and the view wasn’t as spectacular. I didn’t care about that though. As long as I was with Gavin, it didn’t matter where we were.
“Ms. Summers.” A tall, elegant brunette greeted me as soon as I stepped inside the room. “I’m Rose, your stylist for the evening.”
I smiled and shook the hand she offered. “Call me Carrie, please.” Another woman stepped forward to take my hand when I was done. She was short, probably barely five feet tall, and curvy.
“I’m Glory. I’ll be doing your make-up.”
I nodded. For a moment, we stood there, and then I spoke, “I’ve never done this before, so I need to know what you want me to do first.”
Two hours later, I stood in front of a full-length mirror while Rose
and Glory finished up. The dress Krissy and I had chosen was a deep, rich green, so Glory had done my make-up to match. My eyes looked huge and even darker than normal, and my lips a wet shade of red that was dark enough to complement my skin, but not so red that it looked like it belonged on a hooker.
Because of the Miami heat, the air conditioning would be on full blast, allowing me to wear my hair down. Normally, I wasn’t fond of it that way since my curls had a tendency to go a bit wild, but Rose was a magician. She tamed the curls and twisted half of my hair back so it’d be off my face, but left it hanging down so that it reached the small of my back, just below where the dress’s open back ended.
One of the reasons I’d liked this dress was that it had a modest neckline, showing just a hint of cleavage, but the back was daringly low. Like my gala dress, this one was long, but it didn’t have the slit up the side. Instead, it hugged my legs, hips, and waist. I could walk in it as long as I took small to normal-sized steps and moved slowly. If I tried to hurry, it wouldn’t end well.
I was just slipping on my four-inch heels – a concession to the walking difficulty – when the door opened and Gavin entered.
“The guests are starting to arrive,” he said. His eyes lit up as Rose stepped out of the way and let him see me. “Wow.”
I smiled. “Rose and Glory did an amazing job, didn’t they?”
He nodded, still not taking his eyes off of me. “Ladies, you’ve outdone yourself. I’ll be sending bonuses with the second half of your payments.”
They thanked him, but I wasn’t sure he even heard them. The only reason I saw them leave was that they had to cross into my line of sight to do it. Gavin and I were too busy looking at each other to acknowledge their exit. He was wearing a tuxedo, but I thought it was a different one than he’d had before. This one had a small bit of color. His tie was a dark shade of blue that would’ve looked black if it hadn’t been next to his jacket. The cut of the jacket was different too. I didn’t know enough about men’s fashions to be able to name it, but whatever it was, I liked it. Even more than his other one, this tux showed off his physique.
“You look magnificent,” he said.
He held out his hand and I took it, electricity racing along my nerves as my palm slid across his. When he raised his hand to his lips and kissed the back, my heart did a little skip.
“But,” he added. “Even all of this can’t compare to how you looked last night.”
My insides gave a pleasurable squirm.
“That, however, is just for me to enjoy.”
I nodded, not trusting myself to speak. If I opened my mouth, there was a good chance we wouldn’t make it downstairs and all of this preparation would’ve been for nothing. Still, it was tempting.
“Shall we?” The expression on Gavin’s face told me he was thinking along the same lines.
We switched from holding hands to having my arm hooked through his as we descended the stairs. I felt like one of those girls in those movies, who goes to her prom or a party where she makes this grand entrance down a staircase. I didn’t have a spotlight or a theme song, but I did have a handsome man on my arm.
I was able to look around the room as we came down the stairs, taking in the crowd from a different perspective than I’d have once we reached the floor. Hundreds of people were milling around, going in and out of the various doorways that I remembered led to a sitting room, the dining room, and a third room that I couldn’t name. I recognized a few people from the entertainment industry. A director, a couple of actors, and one of those people who are famous for being famous. I also saw entrepreneurs I’d seen in various business magazines and running charities, as well as a handful of politicians. And it wasn’t only American politicians. I recognized at least one head of state from Europe and two from the Middle East. I’d seen pictures of them with the president. For everyone I had a name to attach, there were dozens more that I couldn’t place.
Also weaving their way through the crowd were more than three dozen drop-dead gorgeous women in bunny costumes carrying trays of finger food. Every one of them looked like they were about three seconds away from falling out of their tops. Before we reached the bottom step, I leaned closer to Gavin and said, “Howard must think he’s a certain celebrity playboy if he surrounds himself with women dressed as bunnies.”
Gavin laughed, but there was an edge to the sound I couldn’t quite place. “You’re not far off,” he said. “Sometimes I think he believes he’s Casanova.”
My smile tightened. As long as Casanova kept it in his pants and didn’t try to seduce me, we’d be fine. I took as deep a breath as my dress allowed and fixed my smile. Gavin and I were heading into the throng, and our first stop would be to greet the host. Gavin steered me through the crowd with his hand on the small of my back. He could have just kept our arms linked, but I liked that he chose to use a more intimate gesture.
When we reached Howard, I saw that he was flanked on either side by the same two women who’d been flirting with Gavin at the gala. I felt the corners of my mouth tighten, but I behaved myself and greeted them both with smiles.
“Carrie, wow!” Howard’s eyes lit up, then began their slow crawl down my body. “You look amazing.”
“Thank you.” I tried not to let him see how much I didn’t like the way he was looking at me. Gavin said Howard flirted with all women. It was just the way he was.
“I’m serious,” Howard continued. “I can’t decide if you’d look better with the dress or without, and that’s saying something.”
I felt Gavin stiffen next to me. Good to know that even he felt Howard had crossed the line with that one. Howard, however, appeared completely oblivious.
“Have you met Delilah and Ellie?” He motioned to the blonde and brunette respectively.
“Unofficially only,” I said. “They sat next to Gavin at the gala.”
Gavin’s hand slid from my back around my waist to rest low on my hip and very visible to the trio in front of us. The tips of his fingers, in fact, were resting dangerously close to the edge of my panties. A warmth spread through me, part arousal, and part pleasure at his making an unmistakable gesture of possession.
“That’s right.” Howard nodded. “Well, these ladies have been two of my most trusted employees over the past two years. I’d be lost without them.”
Interesting. I seemed to remember Gavin referring to them as part of Howard’s entourage, not as his employees. Before I could ask for clarification, a man in an expensive-looking tux approached. He made one of those small gestures that people do when trying to get the attention of someone they know but not wanting to interrupt.
“Oh, I’m sorry, ladies,” Howard said. “Gavin and I need to speak with our associate for a moment.” He leaned over and whispered something in the blonde’s ear – Delilah, I was pretty sure – but I couldn’t make out what it was. He then smiled at me and headed for the associate.
“I’ll be back as quick as I can,” Gavin said. He lightly kissed my cheek, then followed Howard.
“So, Carrie, you’ve managed to snag Gavin for a date to the gala and to this party.” Delilah gave me a simpering smile. “He is quite the catch. After Howard, of course.”
I refrained from rolling my eyes. Was she serious?
“Howard always has had quite the eye when it comes to spotting potential.” Ellie sounded like she was spouting something from a brochure. I had no doubt Howard had coached her on exactly what to say.
Apparently, he thought that these two would be able to talk him up. Not that it was surprising. He didn’t strike me as the type who had much of an opinion about the intelligence of women, and these two were giving me a pretty good idea as to his usual type. I fully intended to use that against him.
“He must,” I agreed. “After all, he found the two of you, didn’t he?”
They both beamed.
Okay, no sense of sarcasm. This was going to be easier than I’d thought.
“What do you do for him?”
I figured I’d try for a blunt question and see what I got.
“Oh, all kinds of things,” Delilah said airily. “We go with him to parties like this and talk to girls.”
“Talk to girls?” I hoped they couldn’t hear the eagerness in my voice, or if they did, they misunderstood what it was for.
“Yes,” Ellie said. “Girls like you. Ones Howard thinks are interesting and wants to bring into the business.”
I wondered if Patricia Vinarisky had been one of those girls, and felt a flare of anger towards these two women. They might have been legitimately innocent in whatever it was Howard was doing, but I couldn’t believe they’d willingly recruit girls for whatever Howard wanted.
“And what do these girls, the ones like me, do for Howard?” I asked.
Club Prive Book 4 Page 7