“Miss Bennet, are you refusing to negotiate?” Judge Darcy inquired over his glasses.
“Well, your honor, I would have been happy to continue negotiations had Mr. Byrd not disappeared for the last two hours! As it is, he has refused all my settlement offers, the case law is in my favor, and I refuse to be bullied into settlement. It is against my client’s interest,” she answered hotly. Her cheeks were flushed and she was quite angry. Why should she have her client offer more money just to avoid a trial they were likely to win? Not even the disapproving Judge Darcy would make her do such a disservice to her client.
“Miss Bennet, nobody is bullying you. I take your point. Go set it for trial,” he said and dismissed them. He frankly thought the other attorney was being unreasonable and was likely to lose at trial and thought Miss Bennet had made the right choice. Nonetheless, he was surprised that she had the cajones to assert that he was bullying her into settlement! He hid a smile. He was beginning to like her.
Elizabeth, on the other hand, found Judge Darcy disagreeable and overbearing. She had often chatted with Judge Clayton about their families or work but never with him; he was forbidding. He did not look like he would suffer conversation with a young woman. He frankly looked bored when someone was talking to him; and so she did not engage him in conversation. Nor could she forget his dismissal of her feminine charms. Certainly she had not harbored any attraction for him, he rather reminded her of Clark Kent without the super ego, but to hear herself described thus had been a blow to her pride.
So, she was surprised when he spoke to her one day as she stood alone in his courtroom. She was waiting for Charlotte’s case to finish so that they could go to lunch and she had wandered into his courtroom to read the latest Appellate Court ruling that he had posted on his bulletin board. She had not seen him and had her back turned to him as she read.
He saw her come in and stand with her back to him. She was rocking back and forth on one of her high heels, well-shaped legs showing beneath her modest skirt. He took a moment to admire her rear, he was after all not made of stone, as she read. Finding his thoughts wandering into unacceptable territory, he cleared his throat and said,
“That case will be of benefit to you, I think, in some of your toxic mold cases.”
She turned, startled, when she heard his voice. He was sitting at the bench looking over a stack of papers. He had taken off his robe and sat in shirtsleeves.
“Yes, it appears to pretty much absolve the insurance companies of any liability without absolute proof of causation by defect,” she said. He nodded.
“It does disadvantage those people who are the victims of floods,” he said.
“And those people who just refuse to fix a leaky washer and then sue the insurance company for millions.”
He nodded in concession. “You like insurance defense, then?” he asked trying to make small talk.
“Insurance defense allows me to indulge my inner evil overlord,” she raised her eyebrow and steepled her fingers under her chin in a posture of evil contemplation. “All defense attorneys are bad people at heart, you know,” she grinned.
“You’re very good at it,” he said, smiling slightly. She laughed.
“Hey, there you are,” Charlotte said as she came in. “Hello, Judge Darcy,” she said pleasantly.
“Hello, Miss Lucas.”
“Judge Darcy was just telling me what a terrible defense attorney I am,” Elizabeth smiled. Of course she was deliberately misunderstanding his compliment in order to tease him. She was the only attorney who ever teased him; he wondered if he should be flattered or worried.
“You should see how she treats the staff,” Charlotte grinned and Elizabeth gathered her things.
“Have a good day, Judge,” Elizabeth called as she left. She didn’t wait for him to reply.
Over the next few days, Darcy noted with some concern that his eye was drawn to Miss Bennet with an uncommon frequency. He had begun to be... attracted... to her. Of course as a judge, any personal connection with one of the attorneys before him would be highly questionable and probably cause for investigation and headaches... but he could still look. And look he did.
He thought she had a very pretty face; not exotic or glamorous but definitely not in the ordinary mien. She had warm, expressive brown eyes that she often rolled in contempt at her opposition’s arguments when she thought he wasn’t looking. Her eyebrows were dark arches that expressed disbelief, sarcasm, or frustration on quite a regular basis. But she had a quick smile and pleasant laugh. She was generally in good humor and had a keen wit that he appreciated, which she only exhibited when she thought he wasn’t paying attention. Her creamy complexion contrasted against her dark brown hair, which she always wore pulled back into a professional bun or chignon. That a curl usually found its way from her bun only to be tucked behind an ear struck him as somewhat charming, as if she could barely contain the energy that tried to escape from her body.
Aside from her prettiness, Jim was right; she had a very fine body. She was not particularly tall, perhaps 5’4”. She was not too skinny or too heavy; she had good curves that were shown to her advantage by well-cut suits. She disdained the traditional dark suit, often wearing light blues or greens, which he thought suited her better than black. Those colors made her eyes stand out.
Chapter 3
While Elizabeth Bennet was busy impressing Judge Darcy with her impertinence and legal acumen, her sister Jane was impressing another gentlemen in an entirely different way.
Jane Bennet had begun her residency at Meryton Hospital in late June. Since that time, and it was now mid-October, she had been secretly admiring the pediatric surgeon. Dr. Charles Bingley was happy, talented, good with children, and oh-so-hot. She had a fear that he might be gay; but if he wasn’t, she was determined to have him.
“Hello, Dr. Bingley,” she said as she sat next to him in the cafeteria.
“Jane! How nice to see you again. How is it coming over in urology?”
“I wanted to thank you for lending me this text,” she said, placing it on the table next to him. “I think I’ve learned a great deal about the male anatomy from studying this book.”
“I’m glad you enjoyed it. I thought it might be a little hard for you,” he replied.
“Not at all. I think I understand it pretty well. In fact, I’ve taken the liberty of putting my phone number on the post-it note in Chapter Sixteen if you wanted to call with any questions about the text.” Jane licked her forefinger and paged over to Chapter Sixteen “The Male Sexual Response,” and pointed to the post-it note with her cell phone number on it.
“Please feel free to call me, Doctor,” she said.
“Please, call me Charley,” he said a little breathlessly. She smiled. Not gay.
***
“Oh, come on Darcy, it will be an absolute bore without you,” Caroline said as she sipped her coffee with Darcy and Charles.
“It will not!” Bingley said indignantly. Caroline gave him a disbelieving snort and turned back to Darcy.
“It will be full of scrubs and nurses,” she pouted.
“I do know people outside the hospital, you know!” Bingley said hotly. Darcy watched the interaction between older sister and younger brother. He could almost envision her holding Charles out at arm’s length with her hand on his forehead while he swung fruitless punches at her.
“Aren’t you inviting any of your friends, Caroline?” Darcy asked, sipping his tea. Dreadful stuff, the Americans really knew how to fuck up a cup of tea but he drank it nonetheless.
“I’m inviting you, aren’t I?” she said, leaning over the table and poking her finger into his chest. He looked down at her red lacquered nail.
“Halloween is a tedious holiday. Everybody thinks it’s their one time in the year to get outrageous by dressing up in a devil costume,” Darcy drawled.
“It is!” Bingley grinned. “I’m not sure what I’m going to be yet...”
“No doubt it will be
outrageous,” Darcy interrupted. “Maybe you could be a surgeon; you could wear one of those little paper masks!” he said with mock excitement. Then he shook his head and leaned back in his chair. “It’s a time for everyone to get drunk, act stupid, and hide behind a mask while doing it,” he snorted disdainfully.
Bingley sat back with his arms crossed.
“Honestly, Darcy, sometimes I think the wart on Caroline’s ass is more fun than you.”
Darcy choked on his tea and Caroline swatted Bingley on the head. She turned her attention back to Darcy.
“Will, really, I’ll be desolate if you don’t come,” Caroline purred. “Bring Georgie, she’ll have fun.”
Darcy rolled his eyes and put his teacup down. Caroline was under the impression that his 25 year old sister, Georgiana, was perpetually 15.
“I’ll make it worth your while,” she sang, tracing a little circle on his hand with her fingertip. Darcy ignored her and looked at Bingley.
“What time will it be?” he asked Bingley. Bingley grinned.
“Starts at 8.” His smile disappeared. “And you’d better not come dressed as a judge!”
****
“Come on, Lizzy, you have to come with me. I won’t know anybody there!” Jane pleaded.
“Jane, you’re perfectly capable of making friends. Besides, you’ll know him,” Elizabeth pointed out.
“Pleeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeaaaase!!!” Jane said, clasping her hands together. “I really like him and I’d like you to meet him.”
“And what better time to have an intimate one-on-one than when he’s hosting a party in a mask?” Elizabeth snorted.
“If you don’t come with me, I’ll... .I’ll... I’ll think of something,” Jane mumbled weakly.
“I’m trembling at your awfulness!!” Elizabeth laughed. “Fine, I’ll go but I won’t dance and I’m leaving at 11:00. I have an early massage the next morning. You’ll have to find your own way home!”
Jane hugged Lizzy and planted a juicy kiss on her cheek.
***
“How do you like it?” Caroline said as she twirled in a circle before Darcy.
“What is it?” he asked, tilting his head. She was wearing a bright orange jumpsuit that ended in short-shorts and fishnet hose. The suit was unzipped halfway down her ample chest and she was wearing handcuffs.
“It’s a prisoner costume,” she said, turning around again.
“It says ‘property of the penile system,’” he laughed.
“Maybe you should put me in jail, Judge Darcy,” she said as she sashayed toward him. He laughed and let her put her hands on his hips and do a little grind against them.
“Caroline, what are you wearing!” came Bingley’s dismayed cry. Bingley swept into the room wearing a Darth Vader costume. “You were supposed to be Princess Leia!”
“Don’t you find it a little, um, incestuous for us to have coordinating costumes?” she said to him. Bingley put the helmet on his head and raised his fist in the air.
“You have failed me for the last time!” came his electronic voice from within the helmet. Darth Bingley then turned to Darcy and raised a finger accusingly at him.
“What the hell are you?” he intoned. He made a dramatic shaking motion with his hand, enjoying the power of the Force within him.
Darcy put on his helmet and held out his arms. He was wearing a black flame-retardant auto racing suit. It was the suit he wore when he raced cars in college; he was a little dismayed to find it a bit more snug than he remembered.
“Evel Knievel?” Darth Bingley asked. Darcy shrugged and gave a thumbs-up. Who the fuck cared who he was? He was in costume, wasn’t he?
Caroline pouted. “I thought for sure you’d be a judge again.”
****
“Where the hell is this place?” Elizabeth frowned as she held a flashlight to the map. They were in the middle of friggin nowhere, having taken a road off of the Pacific Highway. They had been driving for a good ten minutes without seeing any signs of civilization.
“Did we take a wrong turn?” Jane asked nervously. She gripped the steering wheel and put the high beams on. She slowed as the road turned to gravel.
Up ahead she saw a row of parked cars, and around the bend an enormous mansion came into view. Enormous. With a helicopter on the roof. And a private jet runway lit up with floodlights.
Jane and Elizabeth looked at each other. Just in front of them, someone parked and climbed out of the car. Jane rolled down her window and tapped the horn lightly. The woman, who was dressed in a ballerina costume, turned toward her and Jane called, “Is that Charles Bingley’s place?”
“Yes,” the woman replied. Jane thanked her and rolled her window back up.
“Oh my God, Jane, your boyfriend is Bill Gates’ rich brother,” Elizabeth breathed. Jane looked at her and laughed shakily.
“Think this is the right party?” Jane mused.
“No, most bazillionaires normally keep ballerinas on their grounds just for fun,” Elizabeth replied. Jane laughed and they both jumped out of the car and trudged toward the house.
There was a crowd of people standing around a yellow car at the front of the house. Darth Vader was sitting in the driver’s seat of a Lamborghini.
“Jane!” came his electronic voice. Jane looked at him startled, until he took off his helmet. “Jane, it’s me!” Bingley laughed. He climbed out of the car and walked over to her and kissed her on the cheek. “I’m so glad you came! You look great! What are you?”
Jane was wearing thigh-high vinyl boots and fishnets, short biker hot pants, and a black leather vest. She topped it off by a black cap perched jauntily on her head, blond hair curled into a sedate bun at the nape of her neck. She turned her back to Bingley and he read the lettering across the back of her vest.
“She’s a Hell’s Angel!” Bingley laughed with delight. Jane introduced Elizabeth to Bingley, who greeted her warmly and showed them in.
Darcy was perusing the drink selection, and wondering how to drink with his helmet on, when a particular costume caught his eye. She was wearing low slung leather pants with a studded belt and motorcycle boots. She had a white tank-top on but what caught his eye were the large black feathered wings that were strapped to her back. She had dark kohl around her eyes, but he would know those eyes anywhere.
What the hell is Elizabeth Bennet doing here? he wondered. He slipped the dark visor of his helmet down so that she would not recognize him, and watched her as she looked nervously around the room. She smiled when a blonde biker chick came to her side and squeezed her hand. So, she’s a lesbian, Darcy thought, slightly disappointed and slightly turned on.
He stepped aside as they approached the drinks table, heads close together. Elizabeth looked up at him and smiled.
“Nice costume!” she grinned. “Is that your Mach 5 out there, Speed Racer?” Darcy shrugged and gave as bashful an expression one could while wearing a helmet with a tinted visor.
“Do you know which one is Caroline?” Jane asked Darcy. He pointed to Caroline’s orange back. Jane nodded and caught Bingley’s eye. He raised a gloved hand and beckoned her to him. “I feel an irresistible urge to obey his command,” Jane droned as she put down her drink.
“Ok, Speed and I will be here when you get back... if you survive,” Elizabeth grinned. Jane walked toward Bingley who was already pulling Caroline over to meet her.
“I’m Azrael, ”she said to Darcy, putting her hand out. He shook her hand with his gloved one. “Nice to meet you, Speed.” He nodded and picked up a bottle of wine and gestured toward her. “Why, thank you,” she said as she held a glass to the bottle. He poured her a glass of wine and was about to pour one for himself when he realized he couldn’t drink it without removing his helmet.
“Do you know many people here?” she asked him. He shrugged. She looked at him and unsuccessfully repressed a smile. “Talkative, aren’t you?” she smirked. He shrugged and waved his hands in the air. She laughed.
Good lord she’s
good looking, he thought. She hadn’t come to the party all tarted up like a lot of the women here nor had she chosen an immature cutesy costume, like say a bunny. She was, instead, quite striking. Little did he know that it was a last-minute substitute for a French Maid costume, they were all out at the costume store. He had never before seen her with her hair down; he found it unnervingly attractive.
“I have a confession,” she said. He looked at her and crossed his arms over his chest in an expression of interest. “I don’t know anybody here. My sister there works with Charley at the hospital; he invited her and she dragged me along. I’m a party crasher. It’s always nice to have Death drop in, don’t you think?” she chewed on a swizzle stick and looked at him through her lashes, then laughed.
Inside his helmet he grinned. Elizabeth looked around her.
“Can you believe this place?” she mused. “I had no idea that people actually lived in places like this.” Darcy looked around him; it was a bit opulent for his taste and it was smaller than his estate in England but then Bingley was always one for form over substance. He had no idea why he liked the guy so much.
Darcy turned his attention back to Elizabeth. She was talking to a man in a pirate costume.
“AAAAAAARRRRRRRRRR you having fun?” she asked. Darcy laughed inside his helmet. The pirate laughed and waved his rubber hook at her.
“Shiver me timbers, I need a drink!” the pirate said.
Darcy moved aside as the pirate fumbled with his hook, a wineglass, and a bottle of wine. Darcy watched him in amusement but Elizabeth raised an eyebrow at him and then rescued the pirate. After the pirate had gone, she turned to him and said, “Talkative and helpful.” He put his hand over his heart and bowed slightly in apology. She laughed. “It’s really quite sad that I am completely entertained by a mime.”
He laughed again inside his helmet. They stood in companionable silence as the party became more crowded. They became crushed in and, inevitably, Elizabeth got jostled and spilled red wine down her white tank top.
The Trials of the Honorable F. Darcy Page 2