Secret Baby: A Second Chance Navy SEAL Romance (Forbidden First Times Book 4)

by Sofia T Summers

  None of the rings were right for Jessie. They were so big that they were almost gaudy and I couldn’t picture a single one of them twinkling on her pale, chubby little hand.

  “I ... I don’t know that these are her style,” I said uneasily.

  “Oh, Benjamin, don’t be so boring,” my mother tutted. “You think she wants a boring solitaire from Tiffany’s? No. I’m sure the girl you’ve chosen is special – just like these rings.”

  Jessie, of course, was special. But special in an entirely different way.

  “I ... “ I trailed off. I could see from the look in my mother’s eyes that there was nothing I could do to persuade her and for the first time since spinning my fake engagement lie, I regretted it entirely.

  “This one looks nice,” I said finally, reaching for a ring in the center of the tray. It wasn’t Jessie’s style at all – a circular cluster of large diamonds sat in yellow gold, and it looked heavy enough to sink the Titanic. I couldn’t picture it on her hand – I could only picture her incredulous face when – and if – I presented it to her. She would probably giggle and ask if it was a joke, or if I’d gotten it from a gumball machine.

  God knows it was certainly big enough.

  I’ll just keep it at the bank for a while, in my safe deposit box, I thought. And then I can give it back and say that my fiancée wanted something a little more modern, but she appreciated the gesture.

  My mother, however, beamed.

  “That was your great-aunt Margaret’s,” she said proudly. “The diamonds are old mine cut, see? How they sparkle in the light.”

  I nodded numbly as my mother kept talking while slipping the ring into a soft bag and handing it over to me.

  Margot had been right – lying to our parents was a dangerous game, and now I was in way over my head.

  Fuck.

  21

  Jessie

  When it came time for the day of my lunch with Ben, I had to admit, even to myself, that I was nervous. He’d sounded so downtrodden on the phone when I had said no to dinner, but there wasn’t much I could have done about that. Henny was busy and it wasn’t like I felt comfortable sticking Olive with a stranger just so I could hear my old boyfriend out. Besides, lunch was safer. There wouldn’t be any wine or reason to order dessert. It was quick.

  Businesslike.

  Or so, I hoped it would be.

  That day, it was warm enough to wear sandals and a knee-length dress to the office. I spent an hour on my hair in the morning, causing Olive to whine and make faces and hop around behind me in the bathroom.

  “Mommy, what are you dooooo-iiiing,” she asked loudly, sticking her fingers in the corners of her mouth and pulling her lips to the side. “You’re taking fooooooor-eeeeeever!”

  “Mommy has ... an important interview today,” I lied.

  That made her perk up. Olive looked at me with her tiny little brow furrowed.

  “What kind of interview?” She asked, taking the time to pronounce each syllable in an imitation of me.

  The kind that might find out where the fuck your father has been for years, I thought.

  “I’ll tell you later, sweetie,” I said.

  Olive rolled her eyes at me and walked out of the bathroom, dragging her feet along the carpeted hallway floor.

  This time, I decided, I wasn’t going to waste any time. As soon as I sat down with Ben, I’d come right out and ask him the truth – hell, even before we ordered, just in case it was something that made me so angry I had to storm out of there without offending the server.

  I thought about it all morning at work. I was so distracted that my boss, Donna, had to call my name three times in a meeting and by the time eleven-thirty rolled around, I was a ball of nervous energy. I didn’t want to risk any of my coworkers seeing me with Ben, so I made up some lie about having to take my car for a mid-day oil change and then waited for him in the parking lot.

  The Land Rover pulled into the lot at quarter to twelve on the dot. If I hadn’t been so nervous, the detail would have made me smile a little bit. Ben had always been so punctual, so steady.

  But then I remembered how he had disappeared on me without a word and the hint of the smile that had been building vanished in a nanosecond.

  Benjamin pulled up to the curb. Without waiting for him to put it into park and get out to open my door, I hopped inside.

  “We’re going to Paco’s,” I said. A Mexican restaurant, Paco’s was the closest thing I’d found to my job ... just in case I had to bolt and take an Uber back to the office.

  Ben nodded. He cleared his throat, like he was about to speak, then pulled away from the curb. I had to force myself to tear my eyes away from him – he was wearing a black t-shirt that showed off his muscular physique and dark jeans, the kind that I’d always loved the sight of his ass in. He smelled so good that my mouth watered, and I put my hands in my lap, discreetly wiping my palms on my skirt.

  The Land Rover smoothly joined the moderate flow of lunchtime traffic and before I knew it, we were parking in the lot of Paco’s and walking inside, still without talking. A hostess in a huge, gaudy sombrero led us to a table.

  “Could we have a booth?” Ben asked in a low voice. He eyed me and I shrugged. The server sat us all the way at the back of the restaurant after rolling her eyes at Ben’s request. Being alone with him, even in public daylight hours, was having a disquieting effect on me.

  Suddenly, I wished that he’d just said whatever he wanted to say to me over the phone. That, at least, would have spared me the drama of sweating through my new dress and smiling awkwardly as a mariachi band eyed my figure.

  “Jessie, I—”

  “Wait,” I said, holding up my hand. I cleared my throat. “Just ... just spit it out, okay? Why did you do it?”

  Ben’s brow furrowed and his blue eyes flashed.

  “You know what I mean,” I said, keeping my voice as controlled as I could. “Why did you leave? Why were you gone for so long? Why didn’t you tell me any of it?”

  Ben clenched his teeth and I watched a muscle in his jaw twitch.

  “If you don’t tell me, I’m walking out of here right now,” I declared. “I wasted enough time being pissed off at you – I’m done!”

  The air between us grew charged with electricity as Ben’s hot blue gaze met mine.

  “It was for work,” he said slowly. “For an assignment. I was supposed to be back within two years, but they kept extending my contract and I couldn’t say no. I ... I was in Somalia,” he said finally. “Off the coast.”

  I blinked at him in surprise. Somalia?

  He may as well have said the moon.

  Still, his words hurt. He’d left me, for so long, and it was for a fucking work assignment?

  “I didn’t think I’d be deployed so soon after becoming a SEAL,” Ben said. “But they sent me out almost immediately. It was a crisis, an emergency, and I was forbidden to tell anyone about it. Maybe if we had been married, I could have said a little, but there was no time, and I didn’t know what I could do.”

  I didn’t say anything. The hurt was rippling through my body, cascading through my heart and chest and making me feel weak. I gripped the table until my knuckles turned white.

  “Maybe if we had been married?” I asked in a small voice.

  Ben gave a brief jerk of his head. “Yeah,” he said in a husky voice. “But even then – my CO told me I couldn’t give any specific details.”

  I swallowed hard. Thinking about Ben, my American hero, in Somalia was wild to me. I stared at him, unable to comprehend what he’d just told me.

  “Do ... are you okay? I mean, were you hurt?” I asked in a small voice.

  Ben shook his head. “No,” he said gruffly. Then he met my eye. “I think you might’ve noticed that the other day,” he added, in a tone that was as close to sly as he ever got.

  I flushed hotly.

  “I didn’t expect to be gone that long, Jess,” Ben said. “And I thought that even though
you’d be pissed off and mad at me, you’d understand.”

  I narrowed my eyes at him. “And why the fuck would you think that? What makes you think that what you did was even remotely okay?”

  Ben cleared his throat. He looked away, and when he turned back to me, the expression on his face was almost shy.

  “Because you were the one who always supported me,” he said. “You were the one who always pushed and encouraged me – even more than my own family. You were always proud of me.”

  It was as if the angry balloon in my chest had been punctured. I could feel the hot stream of emotion start to leak out of me, and as I looked at Ben, sitting across the table from me in that ridiculous Mexican restaurant, I felt tears begin to well up in my eyes.

  It wasn’t in that single moment, but rather as if that moment was the crowning glory of my feelings towards Ben over the last couple of weeks. Everything between us had been leading up towards this, and I was rushing headfirst into a storm of emotion that threatened to leave me a sobbing mess of mascara and sweat.

  I realized that I still loved him. In fact, if anything, I loved him more than ever. I pressed my lips together – in the past, I had always been so comfortable and open with my emotions. But now that I wasn’t hiding behind my angry, tough-girl façade, I wondered how I could begin to be soft and vulnerable with Ben again. So many years had passed since we had first met, so many ups and downs had occurred.

  Ben cleared his throat, breaking my train of thought. Our eyes met across the table and a warm, pleasant shiver ran down my spine.

  “So,” Ben began. He leaned forward and raised an eyebrow at me. “What’ve you been doing? Likely not spending time off the coast of Somalia, I assume.”

  I swallowed hard. It was now or never – I could tell him the truth about Olive, or I could lie. What would he do when he found out that I – that we – had a daughter together?

  Would he run all the way back to Somalia?

  No, I told myself sternly. That’s not Ben. Ben is responsible. He’s kind.

  But neither of those things meant that he wanted to be a father. Even I wasn’t Pollyanna-ish enough to believe that.

  “Well, I’ve been spending a lot of time with one person in particular,” I began nervously.

  Ben’s head snapped up and there it was again: that naked, vulnerable look in his sapphire eyes that I had so rarely seen before.

  I blushed and coughed slightly.

  “My daughter. Our daughter.”

  22

  Benjamin

  My jaw dropped as the full implication of Jessie’s words came crashing down to the earth.

  “I found out that I was pregnant almost right after you left, and I haven’t been with anyone since,” Jessie said softly.

  “Jess,” I said huskily. “I always knew that I’d come back for you, that I had to come back for you.”

  Jessie swallowed softly. She took a deep breath.

  “I still love you, Ben,” she said quietly.

  I was floored. In the span of less than ten minutes, all of the secrets between us had come out. I was a father. I had a kid – a daughter! – a real live kid who could walk and talk and play and cry!

  I felt like jumping up and singing. It was easily the happiest moment of my life and I had to restrain myself from leaping to my feet and sweeping Jessie into a passionate, tight embrace.

  “Our daughter?” I asked. It was all I could think about – a sweet little thing with the best of our features, blended together. Immediately, my thoughts flashed back to the day I’d seen Jessie playing outside with the little girl.

  Oh, god, how could I have been so stupid as to immediately not figure out that she was mine?

  Jessie nodded. “Uh-huh,” she said. “Her name is Olive. She’s almost five, Ben. She’s learning how to read.”

  “Holy shit,” I muttered. I leaned back in my chair and shook my head slowly. “I can’t believe it.”

  “She’s definitely yours,” Jessie said quickly. “Like I said, I haven’t been with anyone else, and—”

  “No, no,” I said. I held up my hand and shook my head. “I wasn’t doubting you. It’s just ... it’s fucking amazing, that’s all.”

  Jessie smiled weakly. “She’s amazing,” she said, nodding. “She spends a lot of time with Henny – do you remember her? And my brother, Jared. He helps out a lot. She’s really smart. I don’t know where she gets it. I was a total dunce at that age.”

  “I doubt it,” I said. “Holy shit.”

  Jessie gave me wry little smile. “I don’t think I’ve ever seen you this emotional before,” she said.

  I shrugged. “It’s not every day that a man finds out he has a daughter.”

  Jessie nodded slowly.

  “When can I meet her?” I asked.

  Jessie hesitated for a second. “Soon,” she said. “I promise. She ... well, she’ll be thrilled. But she’s young, and she needs some time to get used to the idea.” She flushed and looked down at her hands for a second. “I know she’ll love you. She’s been asking why she doesn’t have a dad for so long that I was running out of things to tell her.”

  I nodded.

  “It’ll happen soon,” Jessie said. When she looked up at me, I saw her big brown eyes were dancing happily. In her short sundress and with her hair in big, bouncy curls, she looked almost just like she had the first night that we’d met.

  Thinking about that night sent a flash of lust through my body. In that moment, I wanted nothing more than to pull Jessie into my arms and crush her lips to mine. I wanted to taste the salty sweetness of her skin, to show her as best I could how much I loved her.

  And how I was never going to leave her side again.

  “Can you take the rest of the afternoon off?” I asked.

  Jessie giggled. She looked down at the sticky, plastic-covered menu.

  “We haven’t even ordered yet,” she teased. “I thought you wanted to come to lunch with me, not play hooky.”

  I snickered. “For one thing, I wanted to have dinner,” I said.

  Our eyes met and my heart began to thud in my chest.

  “But now, I’d rather just eat you,” I said in a low, husky voice.

  Jessie blushed shyly.

  “Okay,” she said, nodding quickly. “Yes.”

  We left the restaurant – dodging a rude look from the hostess – and went to my SUV, where I drove without saying a word to my condo. As we rode the elevator up to my floor, Jessie looked around. For once, she seemed almost shy, almost hesitant with me.

  I reached for her hand and laced my fingers with hers, squeezing tightly. It was the first time that we’d touched all day and the feel of her soft skin against mine sent a bolt of racing lust down my spine.

  “You know,” Jessie said softly as I unlocked the front door. We walked into my living room and I locked the door behind us, then turned to face her.

  “What is it?” I asked quietly. “What’s wrong?”

  Jessie shook her curly head. “Nothing,” she said softly. “I’m just ... well, I’m kind of nervous, that’s all.”

  Nervous? I thought. You?

  Pulling her tightly into my arms, there was nothing else for me to do but kiss her. Jessie melted against me, opening her mouth to mine as my tongue slid between her lips. She moaned softly and wrapped her arms around my neck, tilting her head to the side as the kiss grew more passionate.

  Hot lust bloomed inside of me and my cock grew stiff as I felt the press of Jessie’s tits against my body. She whimpered as I ran my hands over her curves to the hem of her dress, slowly inching it up her round thighs to expose creamy, silky skin. I dropped to my knees and kissed the insides of her thighs, making her quiver and whimper with excitement. Her pussy was already fragrant and wet and as much as I wanted her right here and now, I didn’t want to fuck her in the living room like she was some one night stand.

  Getting to my feet, I kissed her lips once more and took one of her hands in mine. I led Jess
ie down the long hallway to the master bedroom and tugged her gently in the direction of the bed. Jessie gasped as I picked her up and set her down on the bed, her limbs splaying out as she fell backwards. The skirt of her dress rose higher and higher, showing off her pink cotton panties with a damp spot on the crotch.

  “Ben,” Jessie moaned, closing her eyes and arching her back. The buttons on the front of her sundress strained from the size of her tits and I had to resist the urge to rip it off, send buttons flying across the room. Instead, I climbed between her legs and kissed her passionately as my fingers undid the buttons, one by one.

  Underneath, Jessie wore a sheer pink bra that didn’t conceal her stiff nipples. I lowered my mouth to her chest and sucked her nipples through the flimsy fabric, one at a time. She gasped and moaned, running her hands over my close-cropped hair and straining underneath me. She tasted salty and sweet and I could smell her familiar floral perfume. Mingled with the scent of her pussy, her body smelled delectable and I knew I wouldn’t be able to wait much longer before taking her and making her mine, truly mine.

  I pulled the dress away from Jessie’s body and squirmed my hand under her, unhooking her bra and tossing it away. Clad only in pink panties, my curvy goddess was the most beautiful, delicious sight that I’d ever seen. My cock was throbbing with intense desire and my balls ached, but I wanted to make sure that she was ready before plunging inside of her. I slid my hand into her panties and cupped her pussy lips, felt her wet warmth. Spreading her lips with one hand, I gently rubbed her clit with the other. Jessie went wild. She shrieked and moaned and thrust her hips towards me, straining the pink cotton with every wild buck of her body. She rubbed her pussy against my hand, covering my fingers in her nectar, and I groaned with impatient lust as she reached for my shirt and pulled it over my head.

  Jessie ran her hands down my bare chest, using her fingernails to make tiny delicious scratch marks all over me. It felt so good that I bit my lip and grunted, strained towards her as she teased me. Her fingers moved lower and lower to my jeans and she unzipped them smoothly and tugged them down my hips. My cock was straining the front of my black boxer briefs and Jessie gasped softly as she rubbed her hand over my bulge. The warmth of her hand through the fabric was incredible and I closed my eyes and strained, arched my back and leaned into her caress. She hooked her fingers into the waistband and tugged them down. My cock sprang free and Jessie wrapped her hand around my shaft. Her hand was petal-soft against my erection and I groaned loudly as she began stroking me up and down. White-hot pleasure shot through my body as she stroked me and it took an incredible, Sisyphean effort to push her hand away.