by J. H. Croix
He stopped, maybe an inch away from me. “Harper?”
“Hm?”
“What are you doing?”
“Kissing you,” I replied.
His chocolate brown gaze locked with mine, searching. I didn’t know what he saw there, but I could see the beat of his pulse in his neck, and his breath was shallow. Impatient, I yanked him to me. The moment our mouths collided, it was as if I’d been shocked. A hot jolt scored through me. He froze, and then looped his arms around me, pulling me up against him. Oh, this was perfect. Being held against his hard, hot body was heaven. He slid a palm up my back and curled it around my neck. Our kiss went from a stunning point of contact to a deep dive into pure deliciousness. I’d have guessed Alex to be a patient man, which made him an incredible kisser. He didn’t rush and he didn’t go all caveman and stuff his tongue down my throat. Oh no. He was slow and devastating with soft kisses, sweeps of his tongue against mine and nibbles on my bottom lip. All of it leading up to a kiss so melting, I truly would have collapsed had he not been holding me.
He drew back and tucked his head into the curve of my neck. I was relieved because I didn’t know if I could bear to look at him just now. I’d meant to kiss him as some sort of bold move, as much for myself as anyone, to show I couldn’t be cowed by the past. I hadn’t known kissing Alex would be what that was—a heady, encompassing madness that made me feel more alive than I’d ever felt. Eventually he lifted his head and eased his hold. I hadn’t realized my feet had actually been off the ground until he slowly let me slide down his body. I could feel the ridge of his arousal against me, and my body’s answering clench.
When my feet were on the ground again, I took a deep breath and stepped back. His eyes were waiting for me when I looked up. “What was that about?” he asked.
Excellent question, and one that had layers of answers. Right now, I couldn’t quite contemplate anything beyond this immediate moment. “I wanted to kiss you,” I finally said. A perfectly true answer, but it didn’t capture everything I felt, certainly not the way I felt now.
Chapter 3
Alex
“Bloody hell,” I mumbled to myself as I looked down the long hallway inside the stadium to see Liam standing with our Coach and two reporters just outside the media room.
We’d had our first loss of the season today. One goal—just one—was all that had gotten by me this season so far, but that’s all it took for the other team to win. Truth was, they’d played a stellar game. I’d blocked a number of shots at the goal before one slipped by me and just barely. I squared my shoulders and made my way down the hallway. Coach Bernie had given me a ten minute reprieve after the game because he knew I bloody hated interviews. I sent a silent thanks to Liam. Not only was he my best mate and had been since we were boys, but he took the brunt of the publicity front for me. With me as goalkeeper and him as playmaker on the team, we were often called upon to play nice with the sports media. Liam wasn’t any fonder of it than I was, but he was more jovial by nature. In short, he was better with bollocks.
I reached the group and went to stand by Liam. Coach gave me a subtle nod, his blue eyes warm. Last year, I’d been a bit relieved to get the offer from the Seattle Stars. Don’t get me wrong, I loved playing ball no matter where I played, but I’d been caught in a power struggle on our last team back in London. A power struggle between the goalkeeper who’d come before me and the coach who’d relegated him to back-up goalkeeper after one too many times he’d shown up for practice still sloshed from a night of partying. I’d been happy to take on the starting role because I knew I was a stronger player, but I’d bloody hated the tension. When things went sideways for us at the end of the season and my agent dangled the offer from Seattle in front of me, I jumped at it. It helped to have Liam and two others mates from London along for the ride.
I hadn’t known what to expect from our new Coach, but Bernie Hoffman didn’t brook any drama. The nonsense that happened on my last team? A definite no on this team. Coach came to his role with years of experience as an international soccer star back in his day over fifteen years ago. He was well respected by players worldwide after being a dominant player in his era. He was rock-solid in confidence and work ethic, and expected the same from us. I met his nod with my own and swallowed my frustration. I felt like I’d let the whole team down.
As we followed the interviewers into the media room, Liam leaned toward me. “Mate, ease up. I can see you giving yourself bloody hell in that big brain of yours. Coach chewed out Ethan and two other defenders for leaving too many openings in front of the goal, so don’t go thinking you’re holding the bag alone.”
I glanced to Liam whose bright blue eyes were twinkling. They were almost always twinkling. With his black hair and those eyes, he’d been fodder for the gossip pages back in Britain. I wanted nothing to do with publicity like that, so I ignored it completely. I met Liam’s gaze and shook my head. “Still shouldna missed the stop.” I didn’t offer more, but thrashed myself mentally. I’d been a hair too slow and that’s all it took for us to lose the game.
Liam clapped me on the shoulder. “This’ll only make us stronger. It’s never good to go into the playoffs without at least one loss behind us. Makes us too cocky.”
I might have agreed on that point, but it didn’t make me feel any better. We reached the table and slipped into the chairs flanking Coach. The next twenty minutes or so rolled by in a blur. I tried to keep from looking too grim, which Liam had jokingly noted I tended to do even when we won. I was relieved when we walked out of the room and down the hall. All I wanted now was to shower and go home to watch replays, so I could sort out if there was any way to make sure today’s miss never happened again.
I ignored everyone as I stepped into the locker room. A short while later, I rubbed a towel over my hair and tossed it into the hamper nearby. A few teammates were still around, including Liam and Ethan Walsh. Like Liam and me, Ethan was a British boy. He’d gone to university with us. He’d initially signed with a different team back in Britain, but then joined us and signed on to the Stars when they dangled good offers in front of us. I closed my locker and went to sit down across from where they sat on a bench running the length of one wall of lockers.
“Well, guess it’s best to lose now than later, eh?” I asked.
Ethan glanced over and shrugged. “Bollocks,” he said with a wink. Ethan was as jovial by nature as Liam. If possible, he was even more of a flirt. Liam had been a perpetual tease when it came to women until he’d fallen head over heels in love with Olivia. With Ethan’s shaggy golden hair and green eyes, he’d been dubbed the “Golden Boy Brit.” He found no end of amusement in this. Despite his tendency to joke, I knew he was just as bothered as I was over our loss. He played the left wingback position and was one of our best defenders.
I met his wink with a shrug and leaned forward, resting my elbows on my knees as I looked to Liam. “Surprised to see you still here. Shouldn’t you be off snogging your girl somewhere?”
Liam flashed a grin. “Right you are, mate. I should be. But I’m not. Olivia texted and said I’m supposed to bring you mates with me to dinner with her and her friends.”
Ethan arched a brow. “Told him you’d try to say no, so he made me wait so I could badger you into it,” he said with a slight grin.
I glanced between them and bit back a sigh. I was tired and not exactly feeling social on the heels of our loss. “Tonight?”
Liam stood up. “Tonight. Something to do with Daisy winning a research award. Harper will be there too.”
The moment he mentioned that, my answer was a definite yes. But I wasn’t about to let on. No one knew I fancied Harper. Fancy wasn’t quite up to speed. More like burning hot lust for the girl. It had been a full week since I’d encountered her in the park, and I’d thought about that kiss a few hundred times since then. Suddenly, a social burden became an opportunity. I might’ve wanted to say no, but Liam wasn’t my best mate for nothing.
If he wanted me somewhere, I was usually there. I stood. “Okay, mate. Anything for Olivia,” I said with a roll of my eyes.
Ethan looked slightly surprised, but he stood and walked outside with us. We took a cab to a small Thai restaurant not far from where my flat was. My body was thrumming with anticipation at seeing Harper again. Even I had to admit to myself that my interest in her was out of my control. Before last week, I’d found her interesting and had been drawn to see behind the invisible walls she kept around herself. Between watching her withdraw into a place of fear after seeing that man in the park and rebounding back to boldly kiss me, well, it was safe to say I was bloody determined to crack through her façade. That and do a hell of a lot more than kiss her. Her kiss had been so bold, I got hard just thinking about it.
Downside to being a professional footballer was the flood of women draping themselves about my teammates and me made it hard to be interested. I was immune to the usual cloying charms of women chasing after nothing more than a notch on their bedpost. Harper was different, precisely because until she kissed me, she’d seemed beyond indifferent.
When we walked into the restaurant, my eyes found Harper immediately. She was walking toward the table where Olivia sat with their friend Daisy. Harper’s hips swayed with each step. Her hair was pulled back in a ponytail, as it almost always was. She slipped into the booth, opposite Olivia and Daisy, and I extended my stride, determined to claim the seat beside her. Liam was so focused on Olivia—she was all he focused on in life aside from playing ball—he didn’t notice my attention on Harper. Ethan, however, did.
“Well, well,” he murmured slyly. “Look who has a thing for Harper.”
I elbowed him in the side right before we reached the booth. “Stuff it.”
I ignored Ethan’s choked laugh and smoothly slipped into the booth beside Harper. Ethan, being the solid mate he was, promptly slid in on my other side, crowding me against Harper. He might enjoy teasing a bit too much, but he was solid in every way. If he thought I liked Harper, he’d throw his efforts into smoothing the way for me. At the moment, I glanced to him and chuckled.
Ethan winked and promptly turned to flirt with the waitress. “Hello luv, bring my boys some beers. We lost and we need to drown our sorrows.” The waitress in question, an older woman with glossy black hair, dark eyes, and slim figure, grinned right back at him. “Coming right up.”
Liam glanced to our side of the booth and down to Olivia. “Scootch over, luv. If the boys can fit over there, I can fit here.”
Olivia, as besotted with Liam as he was with her, nudged Daisy in the shoulder. Liam sat down beside her and landed a kiss on her neck. Olivia, whom I’d liked the moment I met her, flushed. She glanced over to us. “Hi guys, sorry about the game.”
“Eh. We took it on the chin,” Ethan replied.
Olivia’s dark hair was tied back in a knot, which bounced when she nodded. “Right then. No need to dwell.” Her green gaze flicked to me. “Thanks for coming, Alex. I thought…”
Daisy cut in. “She thought you guys needed something to take your mind off the loss,” she offered bluntly.
Ethan threw a grin at Daisy. I glanced between them and realized they matched. Each had blonde locks and happened to be wearing green shirts this evening. Daisy’s brown eyes flicked to Ethan and away, a quick flash of curiosity I almost missed in her gaze. Ethan stared at her a few beats longer than usual, leading me to wonder what he was thinking. Rather than wondering for long, I glanced to Harper who was sitting quietly beside me.
I could feel the tension humming in her body and wanted to slide my arm around her shoulder and somehow ease it. If only I knew where it came from. Instead, I reminded myself where we were and ordered my body to behave. My cock twitched—because just being this close to Harper made blood shoot straight to it—but I managed. “Hello Harper,” I said as I waited for her to look up.
She did, and those bright blue eyes of hers widened slightly when they landed on me. “Hey Alex,” she said softly, her expression holding that careful control I’d only seen fall twice before—first in fear and then in desire. I didn’t ever want to see fear on her face again, but desire… Oh yes, I wanted to see more of that. I didn’t know how I knew it, but Harper had an intensity to her that made me know, just know, she’d be beyond wild if she ever let go.
Daisy said something, and Harper’s gaze snapped away from mine as she replied. I’d wanted to see her, but bloody hell, this was inconvenient. I’d underestimated her effect on me. I’d seen her around enough, yet this was the first time I’d seen her since she kissed me senseless. Oh, I took control of the kiss once it started, but make no mistake, she started it. Her boldness, hidden behind her controlled façade, nearly set me on fire.
The waitress arrived and delivered our beer. Liam ordered drunken noodles for all of us, declaring we’d love them. Meanwhile, conversation carried on around me. This was nothing unusual for me. I enjoyed my mates, yet never felt much need to talk. What I wanted right now was to be alone with Harper. Since that wasn’t an option, I’d take what I could have. With Daisy bantering with, well, everyone but Harper and me, I looked to Harper to find her blue gaze waiting.
My cock twitched again, and I ignored it. “Haven’t see you at the park again,” I said, promptly regretting my comment. I might not know why, but I’d wager Harper had no interest in setting foot in the park again if it meant she might encounter the man who’d made her freeze in fear from afar. I’d seen him again myself from a distance. Had we been alone, I might’ve considered approaching him. But the park had been busy with runners, walkers and the like, so I’d ignored him.
Harper shook her head, her glossy dark hair swinging to and fro in its ponytail. “I haven’t been. I, um…” She paused and worried her bottom lip between her teeth. Bloody hell. She needed to stop that, or my cock would stand at attention again. As it was, it was at half-mast every moment I was near her.
When the moment of silence stretched, I felt inclined to reassure her. “You don’t need to explain. I can guess at why you might not go to the park. If you do want to go, just tell me when and I’ll meet you there.”
I meant it, yet my words startled me. I wasn’t one to rush or push. No, rather I held back. I liked women quite well. I just didn’t like the publicity associated with trying to date whilst under the microscope of being a sports star. Back in London, I had some arrangements that suited me well. I could take care of my needs, leave women satisfied and keep it out of the press. It wasn’t what you might think. I don’t mean I paid women to have sex with me. Rather, I lucked into meeting a young widow who absolutely wasn’t looking for love, but she had needs, same as me. My connection to her led me to another woman, this one no widow, but in a chaste marriage—a quite public marriage. Once again, a woman who had needs and required the same privacy I preferred.
Before you go thinking I thought it was okay to bust in on someone’s marriage, it wasn’t quite like that. They’d married because they were best friends and for business reasons. In some ways, it seemed from the outside they had a better marriage than many people I knew. They respected each other and cared about each other. They just didn’t consider sex part of their marriage. Not a choice I’d be inclined to make, but not my place to judge. Since moving to Seattle, I was in a bit of a dry spell. A visit or two to London wasn’t quite meeting my needs. So perhaps, my cock had a few opinions on the matter.
Nothing with Harper was about simple physical need. Meanwhile, in the vein of pure physical need, Harper was like a jolt of adrenaline to my sex drive—she by herself was the magic ingredient. Did I say bloody hell yet? Because, dammit, I needed to get a handle on myself.
Before I could think to correct my offer, Harper’s eyes searched my face. After a moment, one corner of her mouth kicked up. “You’d run with me?” she asked.
Just that, barely a smile from Harper, and it felt like the sun coming out. Aside from the simple fact I enjoyed her smile, she had a delectable
mouth. Her face was usually held tight, but when she relaxed, even a little, her mouth did too. Her lips were plump and full. I knew precisely how they felt under mine—soft, lush and mobile. She angled her head to the side in question, and it suddenly occurred to me I hadn’t answered her.
“I would,” I said.
“Oh,” she said, the single word coming out on a breath. I could see her pulse beating at her throat and wanted to lick it. Not now though. Not with the hum of conversation around us and the curious eyes that would surely turn our way if I acted on my impulse.
“Do you run every day?” she asked.
“Most days.”
“What time?”
“Eh, usually six or so.”
Her eyes were thoughtful and turned inward again. I could feel her thinking. “I like to run and so does Stanley,” she said suddenly. “If you tell me when, I’ll meet you there.”
I felt as if she’d handed me a present. I slipped my hand in my jeans pocket and pulled out my phone. “Here, put your number in. Password’s Queen34.” I said, handing it to her.
“You want me to just put my number in your phone? And you’re telling me your password? Are you out of your mind?” she asked, her surprise wiping that controlled expression off of her face.
I shrugged. “Don’t think so. I’ve got nothing to hide. Put your number in and I’ll text you in the mornings before I go. I run right by your building, so we can start there.”
“Trust me, Harper, Alex has nothing to hide. No naughty pics for you to find on his phone. Probably not even any juicy phone numbers,” Liam said with a grin.
Harper looked from me to him and started laughing. Daisy cocked a brow. “Wow, you’ve got moves, Alex.”
I glanced her way quizzically.