by Anna Hub
We travelled for most of the day in silence, staying close to the river until Brayden announced that he wanted to settle for the night.
"We're sheltered by thick trees, we're a long distance from the village and the land naturally sinks lower which means the chance of anyone spotting smoke from a fire is slimmer."
I sat down on a boulder, relieved to have some fresh food stock. It wouldn't last long but at least we had a couple of days before supplies became an issue. Brayden sat too as he stared at the ground, his expression dark.
I couldn't believe what had just happened. I truly never thought he would actually attack someone who meant him no harm. Although he'd defended us from numerous attacks in the Valley, he'd never harmed anyone without reason. But Tara hadn't done anything.
We sat in silence for a long time, occasionally catching each other's gaze as we processed the events. I knew he wouldn't have intentionally done anything to harm Tara, but all this time outside the village, I'd managed to convince myself his Instinct was fading. This was a tough reminder that it was stronger than I wanted it to be. How could he could be so calm and encouraging when we were alone, but as soon as someone else arrived, he was completely lost?
"I'm not sure what happened," he said.
I swallowed. It wasn't his fault but I struggled to digest the idea that my decision about keeping contact with the village had been taken away. I had no idea where we stood with Tara and Matt now, and going back would never be an option. I took his hand to let him know I was still on his side.
"I don't even remember how I got there." He shook his head. "I thought I'd figured out how to contain it, but it's stronger than me."
I shifted closer. "No. It will get easier. You can learn to control it."
He stiffened, as if frustrated by my positivity. Was it worth telling him what Tara had said about people controlling their Enhancements, or would that only put him under more pressure?
"The more we know about how it works, the closer we'll be to overcoming it."
He turned away and set to work on a dugout. I sat back, watching him work, reminded of his cold disconnection the first time I'd met him in this world. It had been a long time since I'd seen him that way, but right now, I knew words wouldn't help him. No matter how much I had tried to force positivity into him back in those early days, he'd remained distant. Just like I'd suffered my own doubts recently, he needed to bear his in silence. And that was okay, but whenever he glanced in my direction, I did my best to offer him encouragement. If for no other reason than to let him know I still trusted him.
The temperature dropped and I could have sworn it was colder than it had been at our old camp. "We're definitely west, aren't we?"
Brayden checked the setting sun. "A little more south than we should be, but we had to follow the river."
Perhaps we were already suffering the climate fluctuations Tara had spoken about. "It's getting cold."
Although we hadn't been able to make a fire for the past week, we still had the tools ready just in case. Brayden pulled them from the bag.
"Can I try?" I asked. He handed them over and I lined the soft wood against the plough. "Like this?"
He nodded as I worked, following his instructions to keep my angle and pace working to my favour. The friction irritated the skin but I was determined to learn. Being lost in the Valley without him had made me realise the importance of mastering these skills. The task quickly grew frustrating but Brayden didn't interrupt.
"Why isn't it sparking?"
He leaned forward and shifted my angle. "Try a little faster."
Ignoring the building muscle pain and raw hands, I did as he said, focusing on maintaining a regular speed rather than burning out. Tinder shaved away easily but there was no sign of smoke.
"Am I even close?"
He ran fingers through the tinder. "It's warm, but you're not going fast enough."
I worked harder but even with the increased pace, I didn't seem to be getting anywhere. Despite the cooling forest, sweat built in my hands and the plough started to slip out of grip. "Damn it." I threw the wood at the ground and wiped hair from my face.
Brayden picked up the wood up and worked at the tinder once more. I sat back as the grey splintered into his eyes and within minutes, smoke curled over his hands. I leaned in and blew gently against the tinder, pausing and feeding the tiny sparks until they grew.
Brayden pushed more wood into the fire while I took note of his techniques for next time. I exhaled my frustration and despite his own worries, he grinned. "You have the concept, it'll just take practice to get it right."
"And so do you."
He stared into the flames. "Right."
Chapter Three
We spent the next couple of days collecting food. Although we didn't know how long we would be staying, we still gathered branches into a shelter to help cut the wind at night. During the day, we worked hard to understand our new world, tracking the climate changes to see if Tara was right about this location and searching for animal tracks that might lead us to food. By the time night hit, I was always exhausted. Mostly because food was harder to come by and we couldn't afford to eat everything we wanted but I was glad for the distraction. The Instinct came and went, but as the days passed, Brayden's mood improved.
With each night, I got closer to succeeding at fire making but so far, Brayden always had to take over. It might take me a couple of weeks to get there but at least now I had a fighting chance of starting one on my own if I was ever lost again.
I pulled my shadow closer and enjoying the warmth it brought as I wrapped it around my legs and stared into the fire.
"Ever notice how quiet it is out here?" Brayden asked.
I shrugged. "I guess."
"Not just now, but during the day too. No birds, crickets, whip cats."
"Do you think Tara was right? Food isn't available in this part of the forest?"
Brayden scratched at stubble on his cheek before he tipped a rock nearby. "Look, no insects underneath. There's nothing."
I licked my lips. "Is there something wrong with the soil? The plants seem to grow okay."
He dug around in the dirt, eyes shifting to grey as he sniffed at a handful. "It's not the soil, but something isn't right."
Nerves fluttered through my stomach. If there was an immediate danger he would know about it, but I couldn't help thinking of Tara's warning.
"When we left the Valley I could see the land on either side of the mountains. The forest is broken by barren lands all around. There has to be something else beyond it but I'd be reluctant to walk through those areas without knowing when we'd find water or shelter," he said.
"It seems like too big a risk to take right now."
"Exactly. We'll try fishing tomorrow. With the fire to cook, that should be substantial enough to keep us going for a while."
I'd spent the last few days trying to ignore the fear of the future but suddenly it seemed too overwhelming to ignore. My chest grew tight as I considered how trapped we were by the need to survive. I'd experienced great periods of stress before but nothing compared to the fear of being without food.
"Do you still think we made the right choice?" I asked.
"I think what happened with Tara proves that we didn't have a choice."
I swallowed. "True."
Brayden fell asleep easily but I lay staring at the fire until the early hours of the morning. There was too much on my mind and too much uncertainty for me to unwind. The relief of being away from the danger of the villagers had worn off and now I couldn't help thinking of all the reasons we shouldn't have run.
--*--
In the morning, I found Brayden with his shadow hooked around a small tree. He leaned back, using the shadow as a safety rope until he was almost lying flat, a foot above the ground.
"What are you doing?" I asked.
He released the shadow and the tree snapped back into position, but he managed to twist into a crouch before he could
hit the ground. “I’m just getting to know myself.”
His eyes were almost completely grey and yet he was still capable of conversation, not like he'd been when Tara was nearby. I smiled. "Doesn't it hurt?"
He shrugged. "I want to know what it's capable of."
He moved to the biggest tree and practised hoisting himself into the branches with his shadow. Using the black strap as a pulley, he repeated the manoeuvre until he was high enough for the canopy to block the sun.
"You're going to get stuck up there." I shielded my eyes.
With his legs hooked over a branch, he seemed to calculate the distance with his eyes.
I covered my mouth as he swung out and somersaulted from the tree, catching his shadow midair and using it as a bungee rope until he reached one of the lower branches.
“I can’t believe you just did that.”
Grey flooded his eyes. At least his full Instinct had been involved and I didn't need to worry about him getting hurt.
I watched him for a few more minutes, feeling that perhaps he was getting closer to his old self. He was completely occupied by his task and I shifted some debris away so I could take a seat. As I lowered myself to the ground, goose bumps ran down my arms. A sense of trepidation churned through me and I turned my head slowly to the side.
A female figure crouched on the ground just beyond the trees, her eyes widening as she saw me. I jumped back, quickly assessing her disposition. She shrunk away as we stared at each other and there was no doubt she was from the Origin.
She twisted in an attempt to hide her naked body. Any second she was going to flee; I had to think quickly. I held my hand out like she was a wild animal but her face tightened with fear and her gaze drifted to Brayden hanging in his tree.
"It's okay," I said calmly but she'd already seen the grey in his eyes.
She bolted between the trees and I called out for Brayden to wait before I took off after her.
Skin flashed as she weaved through the forest—no shadow. Just as I remembered my own, it appeared in a flicker of light and tripped me in the next step.
I kicked at the black mass in frustration but when I stood up there was no sign of her. Was there even any point chasing her now? I had no idea which direction she'd run in.
“Your shadow ...” I called out. “Your shadow is the portal!”
Brayden appeared beside me, his eyes still pale. Was that why she'd run? I looked down to the shadow at my waist and the thin strip of animal skin wrapped around my chest. Perhaps she'd been afraid of me too.
I ran a hand through my hair. What had I done? A woman from the Origin had landed right in front of me and I'd let her get away. Just because she passed here once, didn’t mean it would happen again. Brayden placed a hand on my shoulder but I shook it away. It was just like the Valley. I'd seen a woman in need of help and I hadn’t done anything about it.
"Maybe we can track her.” Brayden pointed to footprints trailing through the forest and I ran after him as he navigated between the trees. We hit rocks where the footprints disappeared and my heart sunk. We'd lost her.
"Look at that," Brayden said.
"I can't see anything."
"It's a broken spider web. This way."
We found footprints when the rocks cleared but the ground soon softened into mud. Brayden grabbed my shoulder and pulled me back, and I remembered Tara's advice about vampire leeches.
"She's gone," he said gently.
I rubbed at my temples. If I’d been able to talk with her, I could have found out where she usually passed. I could have been waiting for her next time. Instead she would be alone and there was nothing I could do to help her.
I spent the rest of the day trying to come to terms with losing the woman. I'd done everything I could but it was frustrating to think of how easily I could have helped her if she'd given me a chance. I did my best to shake the thought aside and focus on fishing.
The river in this part of the forest was deeper which made it harder to use our shadows as a net, but Brayden's Instinct was stronger than it used to be. Eventually he waded deeper on his own and angled his shadow into the water. His face smoothed out as the Instinct took hold and he struck the surface with renewed precision.
The fish were wary but Brayden froze in his place, waiting for the better part of an hour before he managed to deal a death blow. The fish floated up and Brayden swiped it in his hand before it could float downstream. He moved to the river bank, his eyes filtering back to brown by the time he stood beside me.
He grinned. "Ready for a fire?"
I nodded; too distracted by everything that had happened to practice fire making for myself. Instead, I watched him work and silently calculated how I would tell him what was on my mind. There was no point sitting back and acting like the Instinct didn't matter. We'd run from the villagers but maybe that didn't mean we'd be alone forever. Surely there were other people in this world and sooner or later, we'd cross paths. Even if it was only newcomers from the Origin, we needed to be able to communicate with other people before they ran away in fear.
But how could I tell him that? He was already doing everything he could to get it under control. I couldn't treat him as though it wasn't good enough.
In reality, we both knew what the problem was. So perhaps focusing on the solution would be the best way to proceed.
He wrapped the fish fillet in leaves and pressed it between two hot rocks. There was nothing left to do but wait.
I cleared my throat, unsure where to start. “Tell me about your family.”
Brayden lifted his head as though he sensed this was more than casual conversation. “What do you want to know?”
“Everything,” I tried to soften my voice.
He shrugged; resting his elbows against his knees. “You already know I have two brothers. Actually one is a half brother but he's quite a few years older, so I never really felt close to him. He moved interstate.”
“What about your parents?”
“What about them? And why are you asking?”
“We don't really know much about each other's lives in the Origin."
He stared, his eyes narrowing. "Didn't we already have this conversation in the Valley? You demanded that we learn more about each other to see what we had in common."
I shifted, breaking his stare for a moment. "Maybe, but that's about the only time we've spoken about the past."
"That world is a lifetime ago. It's not relevant anymore."
"You keep saying that, but our past shapes who we are ..." I trailed off. Had I said too much? "Just tell me what your parents were like."
"They were great. Supportive, comforting ... gave me all the security I needed to become a well balanced adult," he said pointedly and I blushed. "What's this about, Sel?"
“I’m just trying to figure you out.”
His lips straightened. "You're trying to figure out why I became this way?"
I turned to the fire, suddenly feeling guilty for not asking him out right. "Maybe there's a correlation. Understanding where it comes from is the first step to controlling it."
"Why does that sound like someone else's words?"
"This is important. I don't doubt the person you are, but life would be easier in this world if you could learn to control it better when other people are around."
His expression darkened. "Right."
Guilt rose up. I'd made that sound worse than it was. I groaned inwardly.
Brayden shook his head, avoiding my gaze. "Trust me. There's no dark secret from my past that could have brought this on."
I sat back, shifting the hot rocks with a stick to check the fish. "The food is ready."
Brayden took his share and we both ate silently on either side of the fire. Hunger still clawed at my stomach but we were running low on supplies so we'd have to wait until the next day to search for something extra. I glanced at Brayden, his eyes reflecting the flames as he stared blankly.
A hiss struck the fire and we
both looked up.
"Was that a rain drop?" I flinched as another hit my face. Two more drops struck the fire and sizzled.
"Great." Thunder cracked and Brayden packed our tools into the bag. "Come on, let's find shelter."
We walked through the darkness to the river's edge. Brayden glanced at a tree looming above. "This one should be thick enough."
"The best shelter we'll find anyway," I agreed.
He dropped the bag of tools and sat down, back against the tree trunk. Rain still filtered through the canopy but it wasn't unbearable. I circled for a moment before sitting in front of him, perched on my knees so he couldn't avoid my gaze.
I needed to make amends. "I'm sorry."
He met my gaze but didn't reply.
"It was condescending to try and tiptoe around the question."
"If you'd just asked, I would have told you."
"I guess, I thought I could word it in a way that you wouldn't even have to know—"
"That you doubted me?"
"No." I placed my hands on his knees, leaning forward. "In a way that wouldn't make you feel pressured to be someone else."
"I'm sure some part of you wishes I didn't have this Instinct."
I locked my fingers between his. "Of course not. We'd be dead without it. I'm just disappointed I lost that woman from the Origin, and stressed about losing a reliable source of food. But none of that is your fault."
He inhaled deeply, reaching for the side of my face. I leaned into his hand, closing my eyes as he gripped my jaw. His hand traced down the front of my neck, resting at my collar bone. Could we really just act like nothing had ever happened? Was it that easy?
"Aren't you mad at me?" I whispered.
"Maybe a little." He pulled me closer, his hand moving up my thigh. "But not really," he smiled as he spoke.
My cheeks reddening at the way he watched me. I crawled closer and the longer he stared at me, the more distant our argument became. He tugged at the animal skin skirt around my waist, using it to draw me forward.