“The church is at the far end of Main,” Laura said. “If you see Brand and the children—”
She paused. He knew exactly what she was thinking. “I’ll ask them to show me around,” he said.
CHAPTER 33
Tom went inside to grab his hat off the hall tree and was back out and off the porch in seconds. Looking up at Laura, watching her watch Tom leave, Maddie was reminded that the two of them had met during the war. At a social function, Tom had said.
She imagined Laura dressed in high fashion, covered in jewels, surrounded by rich and powerful soldiers, politicians, entrepreneurs. Men who would be so lost in her dimples and her stunning eyes that they would have no idea she was milking them for information. She would be a hard woman for any man to resist.
Now her biggest concerns appeared to be tea cookie recipes and correcting children’s manners.
“Come with me,” Laura said.
Maddie left the swing and followed her into the house where Laura entered the sitting room and opened a barely noticeable narrow door in the far wall. She let Maddie enter first and she found herself inside a small room with only one window. The walls were lined with bookshelves filled from floor to ceiling with books. Two comfortable armchairs flanked a low butler’s table.
“Have a seat,” Laura invited. “I’ll have Ana fix us some café au lait.” She hurried away, leaving Maddie alone to marvel at the collection of books.
When she returned, Laura sank into the empty chair and tucked her feet up under her.
“I’ve never seen so many books in one place,” Maddie said. “Have you read them all?”
Laura laughed. “Not yet, but I’ve read a good number of them. Books were my hiding place when I could not bear my life. I escaped into them. You can borrow any that you like.”
“I can’t read.” Maddie colored with shame but kept her head high.
Without hesitation, Laura smiled. “Then I’ll teach you.”
Ana slipped in, served the café au lait, and slipped out. Maddie closed her eyes and savored the scent and the taste. She smiled with her eyes closed.
“I missed New Orleans terribly.” Laura’s expression was full of such understanding that Maddie found it impossible not to open up to her.
“How hard was it for you to become accepted here?” She asked out of concern for Laura but also wondered about the challenge of making a life here.
“When I moved here, I posed as a wealthy widow named Laura Foster. About four years later, Brand set his sights on me and refused to take no for an answer. I tried to dissuade him. I feared for his position if anyone found out about me — as they were bound to — and very shortly, they did.”
“Was it terrible?”
“At the time it seemed like the end of the world, as all crises do. I ran away but Brand came after me. His faith and love gave me the strength to face my past and his congregation.” She studied Maddie’s face and said quite earnestly, “You really don’t have to tell me anything, you know.”
“I can’t have it between us.”
There was a comforting silence in the house with the men and children gone. Tantalizing aromas escaped the kitchen as Rodrigo prepared the evening meal. It was a serene moment with just the two of them tucked away in the library.
Maddie took a deep breath. “The man who took me away that night—”
Maddie heard Laura catch her breath. The high color quickly faded from Laura’s rosy cheeks. Her hands gripped the arms of her chair.
“It’s not what you think,” Maddie quickly assured her. “He never hurt me physically. In fact, he treated me like a daughter.”
Laura grabbed her hands. “Oh, Maddie! I’m so relieved. That night, after … after what happened to me … all I could imagine was that you were somewhere in that house suffering the same pain and humiliation. I would have never believed that anyone there would have anything other than perversion on his mind. To think that he raised you as his own. Why, it’s a miracle.”
Maddie’s heart ached for this woman she barely knew. Her sister must have suffered very deeply for a long, long time.
“I wasn’t the only child Dexter Grande ‘acquired.’ Are you familiar with the name? He had to have known the owner of the brothel. Did he ever cross your path?”
Laura shook her head. “Not that I recall.”
Maddie went on to tell her of the warehouse in New Orleans and the tribe.
“Dexter used us all. Taught us to beg, steal, gamble, pick pockets. He taught one of the older girls and me to lock up the young ones he brought home. We kept them imprisoned until their memories were erased and they became dependent on us and each other.
“Until now I refused to believe it happened to me. I asked him once and he denied it. I asked him about my nightmare and he explained it away. Even knowing what Dexter was capable of I believed him, but you have proved that he destroyed my past exactly the way I did to so many.”
“You’re my favorite, Maddie.”
You’re a liar, Dexter. She wished she could say it to his face.
“You’ll never forget what happened, but you must try to put it behind you now,” Laura urged.
Maddie closed her eyes for a second. Saw Louie, Rene, Selena— the tiny lifeless babe so cold in her arms. She shook her head no.
“Some things I don’t wish to forget.” She opened her eyes and found Laura brushing away a tear. Maddie said, “I was married, Laura. At least I believed I was.”
She described Louie, explained how he was killed. When he died.
“How old were you then?”
“I don’t know. I … I really have no idea how old I am now.”
“You are nearly thirty-two,” Laura smiled. “Your birthday is next month.”
“So old,” Maddie whispered. “I thought I was no more than five and twenty.”
Laura’s laughter was an uplifting sound despite the pain in the room. She said, “If you think that’s old, then I’m ancient. I’m two years older than you.”
“We had two children.” Maddie went back to her story. “Our daughter, Selena, died at birth. My son, Rene, died five years ago. He was the age your Sam is now. Do you and Brand know how precious, how irreplaceable, your children are?”
“I can’t imagine losing a child,” Laura whispered. “I’m not sure I would survive.”
“I hope you never have to.”
“And Dexter Grande?” Laura’s color was back.
“Dead.”
“Good.” Laura’s fierceness shocked Maddie. “How did Tom ever find you? He had no more than a name to go on.”
Maddie flushed. “He heard of Dexter and the tribe and was looking for me only because I was a Grande and might be able to help him.”
“He wrote and said the search for you inadvertently helped him solve a kidnapping case.”
“My brothers stole a little girl from a wealthy family.”
“Brothers?”
“Brothers in the tribe. I’d moved to the bayou with them a year ago. Dexter had died; the rest of the tribe had disbanded and drifted apart.”
“Where are your brothers now?”
“One of them was killed. The other will be in prison for a very, very long time. Tom insisted I meet you. He had no proof that I was your sister. He was just going on a hunch and I thought he was crazy.”
Laura gazed out the window toward the white church steeple in the distance.
“I’ve learned not to question why things happen the way they do. Not anymore,” she said.
Maddie found herself thinking how lovely it must be to have faith.
“How long have you and Tom been in love?” Laura asked without warning.
“What?” Maddie bobbled her cup and saucer.
“It’s obvious he loves you a great deal. You have noticed, haven’t you?”
“He admitted as much before we came here.” Maddie was amazed at how easy it was to talk openly with this woman she’d just met.
“Don’t you
return his love?”
“He’s a Pinkerton. I’m a thief.”
“A former thief.” Laura smiled. “Or should I hide the silverware?”
Maddie found herself smiling. “No. Of course not. But—”
“At one time I never thought marriage to Brand was possible.”
“A life with Tom is not for me,” Maddie said.
“You don’t love him enough, then, is that it?”
Maddie thought back to the love she’d once felt for Louie. She’d been so young. Every minute had been new and exciting. They shared the same lives, the same experiences.
She couldn’t deny her physical attraction to Tom, the way his combined gentleness and strength made her feel. He was courageous, intelligent. An upstanding citizen and man of his word.
All reasons why she couldn’t give into her feelings.
“No.” It was a little lie uttered very softly. “No. I don’t love him.”
The truth was she loved him too much. She loved him enough to let him go.
CHAPTER 34
That night at dinner the McCormicks assumed Tom and Maddie would go to Sunday service with them the next day. Maddie declined, but no matter how hard Brand and Laura tried to change the subject, the children relentlessly wanted to know why not. When Tom agreed to go, adding that he was interested in hearing Brand speak, Laura assured Maddie that her absence was still all right. Jesse would be at home too.
Maddie realized she had no excuse not to join them save one: the only time she had been inside a church was to steal from the donation box.
For the first time in forever, Maddie slept without suffering her nightmare. The beautiful weather held, and the next morning, she decided to accompany them. They arrived at the church early and found Hank Larson’s wife, Amelia, the new choir director, already there. Amelia took the children to the back room to await the others.
Brand stationed himself at the front door eager to greet his flock while Tom escorted Maddie and Laura down the center aisle of a church that wouldn’t fill the first floor of Laura’s home. A crowd soon gathered in their seats, and a hush fell over the congregation when the choir finished their opening hymns and Brand took his place behind the lectern.
With Tom beside her, Maddie studied the people around them. These were definitely not soft city dwellers. The ruggedness of their lives showed in their sunburned, weathered features and the lines etched into their faces. No one else appeared to be as well off as Laura. Comparing Laura to the citizens of Glory, it dawned on Maddie that her sister was even more out of place than she.
After church, Laura gathered the family for Sunday supper and included Hank and Amelia Larson. Amelia, the town apothecary, was the closest thing Glory had to a doctor and Laura’s closest friend. Amelia even mentioned that Laura had planned and hosted the Larsons’s wedding.
Hank plied Tom with questions. When he discovered Tom was a Pinkerton, he relentlessly tried to persuade Tom to become Glory’s sheriff.
Once supper was over, before Ana Rodriguez brought out her husband’s special flan for dessert, Laura tapped her spoon against her water goblet and called everyone to attention. Silence descended over the table.
She looked at each one of them in turn.
“I’ve told you about how my mother and father sailed over from Ireland to Louisiana to find a new life and how they both died far too young, leaving us behind. We were separated when I was a child of about your age, Sam.”
Noting how young and vulnerable Sam appeared, Maddie wondered how she and Laura even survived at all.
“For years I’ve been searching for my sisters,” Laura said.
Maddie caught her breath. Her gaze fell to the handle of her spoon, to the shining shamrock within a circle.
“Sometime back, I hired Tom to find Megan. She and I were closest in age. She was the one I’d seen last. So my search began with her.”
Maddie looked up to find all eyes upon her.
“… and he has found her. Her name is Maddie Grande now, but she is my sister all the same.” Laura lifted her goblet. Around the table, everyone lifted water and wine glasses in a toast.
“Welcome home, Maddie,” Laura said. “This is your home with us for as long as you wish. If I had my way, it would be forever.”
Cheers went up from the children. Brand winked across the table at Laura, who blushed beautifully.
Slowly a hush fell and Maddie realized they were all expecting her to say something. Beside her, Tom nodded encouragement, though he wasn’t exactly smiling.
When Maddie finally turned to Laura, she said the one thing that was on her mind.
“We have sisters?”
Later that evening, after the house was dark and silent and everyone was asleep, Tom heard a faint, creaking sound and went downstairs. He found Maddie on the porch swing, gently gliding back and forth. She had wrapped a patchwork quilt around a plaid wool robe.
“Can’t sleep?” He settled beside her.
“No.”
“Me either. I thought I heard the swing.”
She immediately stopped. “Do you think it’s disturbing anyone else?”
He started it up again. “I could barely hear it.”
Somehow Maddie had made it through dessert, watching as the others all had second helpings of Rodrigo’s flan. She followed everyone to the sitting room, but as soon as the Larsons left, she claimed exhaustion and retired to her room.
“I’m still trying to fathom that I have two others sisters somewhere. Laura said Katie and Sarah would be twenty-eight and twenty-six now, if they survived.” She paused a moment and then asked, “Have you been searching for them too?”
“I had no idea there were more sisters. After you went upstairs Laura told us that your uncle spoke of taking them to the Ursuline orphanage, but it was closed by ‘53. There were plenty of other institutions, though.”
“What if he lied and sold them too?”
“That’s what Laura and I both fear.”
Maddie fell into a deep, thoughtful silence.
“I know what you’re thinking,” Tom said. “If Dexter did have them, you’re not responsible for anything that happened. He used you, Maddie. As much as it pains you to admit it, he used you.”
“Do you think it’s possible one or both of them were brought into the tribe? That I may have been responsible for changing my own sisters without recognizing them? That I lived with them and didn’t know it?”
“I don’t want to believe that’s possible. Besides, you said there were not many girls.” He tried to sound encouraging, but he wasn’t sure of anything anymore. He forced himself to consider the facts.
“Not all the adoption and orphanage records were destroyed during the War. I may find a lead eventually.” He was tempted to hold her hand but didn’t. “You were very quiet at dinner.”
“It’s all so overwhelming.”
“Say the word and I’ll take you back to Louisiana when I leave,” he offered.
She was silent for so long he thought she hadn’t heard.
Finally she asked, “Back to what?”
“The bayou. Your friend Anita. You don’t have to stay here if you don’t want to.” He hoped she’d say yes. She might not want his love, but at least she would be close enough for him to visit if he ever felt like torturing himself between cases. Maybe, with time and persuasion, she would change her mind and accept his love.
“Laura was devoted to finding me. I can’t leave so soon. I can’t hurt her.”
He felt like a miner, stooping to pick up a nugget of hope. She hadn’t said she intended to stay on forever, but chances were, the more settled she became, the more ties she established, and the closer she grew to Laura, she would never go back to Louisiana.
His words echoed on the night air, breaking Maddie’s heart.
“Say the word and I’ll take you back to Louisiana when I leave.”
He was going back. He had stopped trying to convince her they belonged together. H
e was moving on.
This afternoon Hank Larson had been so hopeful Tom would agree to become sheriff of Glory that she’d let herself imagine they might both be starting new lives here. But deep down she knew he’d be leaving. Just as she knew she had to let him go.
“Thank you again for offering to take me back, but I’m looking forward to getting to know my sister. I’ve dreamed of a new life for so long that I’d be foolish not to stay.”
At least for a while, she thought. At least until I’m no longer in love with you.
Clutching the quilt, she rose, intent upon returning to her room. She knew she wouldn’t be able to sleep, but if she stayed with him any longer she might be tempted to change her mind.
She walked to the porch railing to stare up at the stars crowded in the clear indigo sky. She heard Tom move up close behind her and was sorely tempted to lean back against him. More than anything she longed to feel his arms around her again.
As if he read her mind, she felt him step even closer. His warmth drew her into him. His arms went around her waist, and she relaxed against him with a sigh. Together they stared up at the heavens until, without warning, he let go and stepped away. His footsteps rang loud and clear against the porch. The door opened and closed, and when she turned around he was gone.
Tears filled her eyes and through them she watched a falling star streak across the sky. It was so bright and near she wondered if it had crashed to earth on the open plain or if it burned out before it reached the ground.
She would never know the fate of that star.
Just as she would never know what might have been had she accepted Tom’s love.
CHAPTER 35
Sleep evaded Maddie until just before dawn when she fell into a restless slumber and didn’t awake until after nine. She dressed and hurried downstairs, where she found Laura lingering over coffee in the dining room.
“Good morning, sleepyhead,” Laura greeted her with her ever-present smile, but she wore a look of concern as well.
“Is everything all right?” Maddie asked.
“Is everything all right with you?”
Heart of Lies Page 24