by Lesley Jones
SPIRALLING SKYWARDS: Fading
Copyright © 2016 Lesley Jones
All Rights Reserved. No part of this book may be reproduced or transmitted in any form, including electronic or mechanical, without written permission from the publisher, except in the case of brief quotations embodied in critical articles or reviews.
This book is licensed for your personal enjoyment only. This book may not be resold or given away to other people. If you would like to share this book with another person, please purchase an additional copy for each person you share it with. If you are reading this book and did not purchase it, or it was not purchased for your use only, then please return to your favorite retailer and purchase your own copy. Thank you for respecting the work of this author.
This is a work of fictions. Names, characters, businesses, places, events, and incidents are either the products of the author’s imagination or used in a fictitious manner. Any resemblance to actual persons, living or dead, or actual events is purely coincidental.
Edited by Ashley Wiliams of Adept Edits
Cover design by Sarah Hansen of Okay Creations
Formatted by Max Effect
CONTENTS
Playlist
Dedication
One
Two
Three
Four
Five
Six
Seven
Eight
Nine
Ten
Eleven
Twelve
Thirteen
Fourteen
Fifteen
Sixteen
Seventeen
Eighteen
Nineteen
Twenty
Twenty-One
Twenty-Two
Epilogue
Books by Lesley Jones
Acknowledgements
About the Author
“Paradise By The Dashboard Light” Meat Loaf
“I’ll Be Loving You (Forever)” NKOTB
“I Knew I Loved You” Savage Garden
“Bleeding Love” Leona Lewis
“Beneath Your Beautiful” Labrinth
“Counting Stars” OneRepublic
“Superstar” Lupe Fiasco
“Black Magic” Little Mix
“A Sky Full of Stars” Coldplay
“Ex’s and O’s” Elle King
“It’s Not Over Yet” Klaxons
“Bleeding Love” Leona Lewis
“Stole the Show” Kygo
“Say You Won’t Let Go” James Arthur
For anyone that’s ever said “I’m Fine,”
when the furthest thing you are, is fine!
You can listen to the songs mentioned in this book by following this link:
https://open.spotify.com/user/lkjis/playlist/35hbIO3KskDJppz0hR4Bl0
2007
I stared ahead, not making eye contact with any of the guests because I was too terrified I would cry as I listened to Archie’s words.
“You came to us in the unhappiest of circumstances, Sarah, but you got us through. We lost a daughter, our only child, but we gained two of the bravest, most amazing people to walk this earth.” I turned my head to watch as Archie paused and took a sip from his whiskey tumbler before he continued, “You filled our house with light and laughter as well as that incessant crap that you call music. Kylie, Bros, and that bloody American boy band you had posters of plastered all over the walls.”
He turned and looked from Sarah to Luke. “What was their name? New Boys Up The Street, or something like that?” That gained him a laugh from our guests, and I gave Sarah’s hand a small squeeze.
“You would sing, you would dance, you would make poor Luke part of the show, forcing the rest of us and the dog, even those rabbits you had, Joey and Donnie, was it? Stupidest names for rabbits I’ve ever bloody heard, especially as they were girls! Anyway, you would force all of us to sit there and be your audience, and we loved every minute of it.”
He takes another sip of his drink and looks down at the table for a while.
“You will always be my Sarah Sunshine, and I know that I speak for your nan too, when I say that we couldn’t be more proud of the beautiful woman you’ve become. I feel so very honoured to have played a part in raising you, and even though I now gladly hand you over to Liam so that you can begin this new chapter in your life, I want you to always know that my heart, and my door, will forever be open to you. To Liam and Sarah.”
He raised his glass towards us, and everyone else did the same. I sipped my champagne and then finally turned towards my wife. I knew she’d be crying. I just wasn’t expecting her to be doing it with such a big smile on her face.
I leaned in and kissed her. She was probably getting sick of it. I had not been able to keep my lips, hands, or eyes off her all day. She looked stunning, and she was all fucking mine.
“I love you so fucking much, Mrs Delaney,” I told her with my mouth pressed against her ear.
She blushed and smiled big enough that her one dimple appeared. Squeezing my hand, she angled her face towards me. One lonely tear hung from her long, dark lashes, and when she blinked, it relinquished its hold and landed on her cheek.
“I think this is the happiest day of my life so far. Thank you for making me your wife.”
“Jesus, Sarah,” I croaked out around a lump the size of Queensland that was lodged in my throat most of the day. I pulled numerous faces and swallowed a number of times, trying to get my emotions in check and not sit at the table and cry in front of everyone.
“Thanks, Pops. I’ll keep this short and sweet, much like my sister.”
Luke’s voice interrupted our exchange, and we both turned towards him without untwining our joined hands.
“Sarah, what can I say? When I picked this Aussie Bogan up in a bar in Sydney, the very last outcome I imagined was this. Is ‘sorry’ the word I’m looking for?”
Funny, fucker.
I chewed nervously on my bottom lip, sat back, and draped my arm around the back of Sarah’s chair. I really had no idea where he was going with this.
“A chance meeting and a few colourful words exchanged over a rugby match and a friendship was forged. Liam, you’ve been like a brother to me pretty much since that night, and now you’re married to my little sister, officially making you a part of our family and so much more than just a business partner.”
I watched as my mate set down the notes he had in his hand, scratched at the stubble that had started to appear on his jaw, and looked around the room.
“I love you, man, and now that I’ve gotten used to the idea, I couldn’t be happier that it’s you Sarah has decided to share her life with—”
He steered his gaze to meet mine, his hard cold stare anchoring me to my seat.
“But never forget this—I love her more. Sarah is the most important thing in my life, above and beyond anything else.”
He winked and gave me a slight smile and a head tilt. “You keep her safe, you make her happy, and you and me will never have a problem.”
He raised his glass to an absolutely silent room. “To Liam and Sarah.”
I cleared my throat and stood with shaky legs.
“Thanks, Luke. I think.” Turning, I reached across Archie and my mum and held out my hand to Luke. He shook it. I cleared my throat again and began what I had been rehearsing for weeks.
“Less than a year ago, I arrived here, all ready to help set up a new business venture. I fully expected to be back in Australia by Christmas.” I cast my eyes down to where Sarah sat beside me. Her blue eyes were shining, and a sl
ight smile was on her perfect, perfect lips.
“Just a few days later, my eyes landed on this beautiful girl sitting right here next to me. No one else has existed since. My world was sent spinning, my heart held captive, my life changed forever. I know to many of you this may seem rushed and ridiculous, but I assure you, from the very first time I set eyes on Sarah Carter, I’ve known that she was my future, my home, the owner of my heart.”
Sarah broke our stare and was looking down at the table.
“Thank you, pretty girl, for agreeing to become Mrs Delaney. Thank you for wanting to share your life with me. I can’t promise to always make you happy, but I promise to do my absolute best to never deliberately make you sad.”
I looked along the table and found Mai, Archie, and Luke, making sure to hold each of their eyes for just a moment. “Thank you Mai, Archie, and Luke for welcoming me into your family. Please trust me when I say that I fully appreciate what an honour it is that this beautiful woman you have raised and protected will now be sharing her life with me. I only hope I can do as an amazing job as you have and make her smile her one-dimpled smile at least once a day.”
I went on to thank my parents for their influence on my life and their contribution to the wedding. I thanked the rest of my family for flying over, the rest of our guests for coming, and our bridesmaids and pageboy. I handed out thank you gifts and flowers, and I thanked the caterers and the florist. When I was sure I was done, I proposed a toast to my wife and finally sat down on my still shaky legs.
The last thing I expected was for Sarah to stand and raise her glass.
“When I was growing up, I always wondered why people stared at me the way they did whilst out with my nan and grandad. They’d tilt their heads and then say something to either of my grandparents before addressing me and asking me how I was doing.”
She smiled and then her eyes met mine. It was a brief look, but so much was exchanged between us. I was so full with my love for her, that my chest expanded beyond the point of pain. There was little room for air to enter or exit my lungs or for my heart to beat in my chest. There was only her. She consumed me, and I never wanted it to change.
She broke the connection first and turned to address the room again.
“I began to call them ‘the head tilters.’ I had no clue why they did it. I wondered if that was the way all adults looked at children. Even my teachers did it sometimes. Eventually, I figured out that they only did it with me.” She paused and looked around the room. “I know some of you here today are probably wondering if you’re one of the people I’m talking about, and yeah, some of you are, but that’s nothing to feel bad about, I don’t hold a grudge. As I grew up, I began to understand the whispered words and hushed comments of ‘how sad,’ and ‘what a terrible thing to have happened.’ I began to feel more confused. Yes, I was well aware that my mum had died, and that did sometimes make me feel a little sad when I saw all the other mums waiting at the school gate, but it was only for a second. Just a very split second, because then, I would see her.”
Sarah leaned around me so she could set her gaze on Nan.
“My nan. Her beautiful blue eyes would light up as I approached her, and all was right in my world. Never in the entirety of my childhood did I feel that I was missing out because I didn’t have a mum. I didn’t need one. My nan and my grandad did their utmost to make sure any kind of loss, void, or emptiness was filled with love, light, and laughter. They stepped up at a time when they should’ve been starting to think about retirement, and they took on a three and an eleven-year-old. They showered us with love and affection, but they never spoiled us. They made sure we never went without but taught us that anything was possible with hard work. With a whole lot of input from Luke, they raised me to be a woman worthy of the love of Liam Delaney. Between them, they are responsible for making me the woman this man wanted to make his wife.”
There wasn’t a dry eye in the room. All I could hear were sniffles and the occasional sob. All I could see was Sarah.
“I promise you, Liam, I will always try to be the woman I was raised to be. I promise you, Nan, Grandad, and Luke, I will always do my best to make you proud, and I thank all three of you from the bottom of my heart for today and every day that you’ve been there for me when no one else was. I ask you all to stand now and raise a glass to Mai, Archie, and Luke, the people that guaranteed I had a future, and to Liam, the man that is my future.”
I wasn’t sure what to do. Was I supposed to stand or sit? Mai’s hand reached out and took mine.
“Do you realise how very lucky we are to have her in our lives?”
She was dabbing under her eyes with a hanky as she spoke.
“I do, Mai. It scares the shit outta me if I’m being honest with ya. I’m so worried that I’ll let her down.”
She squeezed my hand again. “Just love her, Liam. Love and protect her.”
“Protect her from who?”
“Herself mainly. When the self-doubt slips in, just reassure and remind her what an amazing person she is.”
I nodded as we both watched Luke pull his sister into his large frame and envelop her in his arms.
“You’ll have him to answer to if you don’t.” She tilted her chin in her grandson’s direction.
“Meeehhh, he’s a pussy. I’m more scared of you.”
“And so you bloody should be,” she said with a chuckle.
***
Hand in hand, we wandered amongst our guests. My entire family had flown over the week before, and it was the first time in a long time that I’d seen both of my parents in the same place at once.
My mum never moved on after their divorce, and my dad just separated from his third wife. I wasn’t sure if I was worried that he hadn’t left my mum’s side.
Sarah had asked both of my sisters if they’d like to be a part of the wedding, but they’d both declined, stating that one maid of honour was enough but my twin nieces, Everly and Eden, had been beyond excited to be Sarah’s “princesses” for the day. Especially when they saw their dresses.
Sarah had kept everything about her and the bridesmaids’ dresses from me but to be fair, I’d told her she could have whatever her little heart desired. I just wasn’t expecting her to be so secretive about it all. I must admit though, watching her become so focused, organised and bossy about our wedding, turned me the fuck on. She was invested and she was happy, which made me happy and just a little bit hard.
All I had been given were directions for what I should wear.
Casual.
Cream.
Waistcoat or vest but no jacket.
Tie.
Just to be sure, she then sent me pictures of exactly what she wanted the groom’s party to wear.
I had to say, although I knew fuck all about this kind of thing, it was pretty obvious that my girl knew her stuff. Everything looked exactly like a page from one of three hundred and seventy trillion wedding magazines that Sarah had shoved under my nose these past few months.
“I need to find Sash, can you see her?” Sarah whispered into my ear as we smiled and nodded at something her nan’s friend Eileen was saying. I think it was some sage advice about never going to bed on an argument if we wanted our marriage to last.
I slid my arm around her waist and brushed my thumb over the curve of her hip.
I had a little surprise for Sarah later and despite the service and speeches being over, the adrenalin hurtling through my system all day hadn’t abated by one iota. I was about to do something I hadn’t done since I was in grade two at St Jude’s Catholic Primary, and Sarah had no clue it was about to happen.
Eileen wished us good luck and made her way to the bar, Sarah turned and wrapped her arms around my neck the instant she left our sides.
I kissed her neck.
“Why do you need Sasha? It’s our wedding day. I’m all you should need,” I whispered into her ear, knowing full well the reaction her body would have to my warm breath on her skin.
I smiled.
I loved her so fucking much I was beside myself with it. I felt as if I were gonna burst out of my own skin. If I were to fart right now, it’d be escaping as rainbows and glitter.
“I need to wee.”
“What?”
“I need to wee, and I need help with my dress.”
“That’s why you need Sasha?”
“Yeah.”
She stared down at my chest as she answered. I curled my index finger under her chin and tilted it up so her eyes met mine.
“I’m your husband, helping you out of your wedding dress is my fucking job, no one else’s.”
She rolled her eyes. “I don’t need helping out of it, I just need someone to hold it out of the way so that I don’t wee on it.”
“Well then, that’s my job, too.” I kissed her neck again, simply because it was there and I could.
She bit down on the corner of her lip, and I could almost hear her thoughts churning through that pretty little head of hers. She had come a long way in the ten months since we first met. Both my chest and my balls tightened when I thought about how adventurous she was prepared to get in the bedroom. She was pretty uninhibited and happy to try almost anything I suggested. I still hadn’t managed to convince her to ask for what she wanted, but we were working on it.
No matter how much she let go between the sheets, she still had issues with bodily functions. She even got embarrassed throwing a packet of tampons in the shopping trolley, which was also something we were working on.
“You’re not still embarrassed to go to the toilet in front of me, are you?” I stepped back so I could see her face. She was blushing and staring down at my chest again.
I wrapped my arms around her shoulders and pulled her in close. “I plan on having my fingers, tongue, and dick inside every orifice of yours that might bring us pleasure over the next few weeks. I plan on fucking you till you can’t walk and until every person staying in our hotel knows my name and exactly how you sound when I make you come.” I again tilt her chin, giving her no choice but to look at me. “And if you can’t walk, your only option will be to let me carry you to the toilet, so get fucking used to it, because I don’t plan to leave your side.”