Spiralling Skywards: Book Two: Fading (Contradictions Series 2)

by Lesley Jones

  When he opened the door, I was lying on my belly with one hand propping up my chin and the other holding my glass. It wasn’t the sexiest of poses, but at least it meant I got to see my husband and take in his reaction the instant he saw me.

  I was totally naked, except for a pair of bright red, five inch heeled Louboutin’s. His favourites.

  A smile touched my lips when he came into view, his attention on his phone. He looked exhausted and more than a little worried. I hoped most of it would vanish when he realised I was here and not still twelve thousand miles away and mad at him. He raised it to his ear, still not having noticed me, and froze when my own phone started ringing on the bedside table.

  My heart both dissolved and exploded inside my chest.

  He was calling me.

  I watched his entire posture change as his eyes slid from my phone to me.

  The hand holding his phone dropped to his side, and my own phone fell silent. Tired blue eyes took me in.

  “You’re here.”

  “I am.”

  “You’re naked.”

  “I’m wearing shoes.”

  “Thank you.”

  “For wearing shoes?”

  “For coming.”

  “I haven’t yet, but I’m hoping you’re about to rectify that.”

  “I love you so fucking much.”

  “Get over here and show me.”

  Without taking his eyes off me, he lifted the strap of his laptop case from across his chest and over his head, letting it drop to the floor. His phone followed. He kicked off his shoes at the same time as he pulled his shirt over his head, not bothering to undo his buttons. His belt and trousers were next, then his socks, and finally, his tight black boxers.

  I took another sip from my drink and watched as he stalked towards me.

  He took the glass from my hand and drained the contents before placing it on the table next to my phone. Then, he sat on the edge of the bed and pulled me around his body so I was straddling him, and he was seated deep inside me.

  There was no messing.

  No words.

  No foreplay.

  I was impaled.

  I wasn’t sure who groaned the loudest, but mine was cut short when he forced my lips down on his.

  His tongue invaded my mouth. His scent invaded my senses. His dick invaded my body, and I welcomed each and every intrusion.

  I raked my fingers through his hair, needing him closer to me. My body heated at the scrape of his stubble against my face, and I almost combusted as my nipples brushed across his naked chest.

  “Sarah. Sarah. Sarah. My pretty girl. Oh, how I’ve missed you. My heart’s been hurting so bad, so fucking bad, baby.”

  He licked from the dip at the base of my throat all the way to my mouth.

  “I thought you were mad at me. You were ignoring my calls.”

  “I’ve been on a plane.”

  “My heart’s been breaking.”

  “I’m here to fix it.”

  “Yeah?”

  “Yeah.”

  “I think my dicks broke, too. Can you fix that?”

  “Absolutely. With these shoes on, I can conquere the world.”

  “Fucking oath you can.”

  I arched my back, offering my boobs up to him, and he squeezed them together, licking and sucking at them both like a man possessed. My knees were gripping his hips on the edge of the bed, and I raised myself on them slightly before lowering back down and grinding against him.

  His hands were everywhere—my hair, my hips, on my either side of my face. He kissed, licked, sucked, and tasted me. It felt as if he had only just started to touch me, and I was already primed to explode.

  “I’m gonna come.” I panted.

  “Yes. Come, baby, please. Let me feel ya squeeze around me.”

  As the first jerks and shudders took a hold, I felt him let go inside me.

  “Sarah. Sarah. Sarah.” Was all I could hear. Over and over again, he chanted my name.

  We both finally stilled. Hot, sweaty, and tired but nowhere near satiated.

  Liam reached around me and grabbed the champagne, offering me the bottle first. I swigged straight from it, giggling a bit as the bubbles made my nose tingle. He did the same and drained it before dropping it to the floor and crashing his mouth back down on mine.

  I could feel him getting hard again when there was a sharp knock at the door.

  “Room service,” a man’s voice called.

  “Shit,” we both said together and giggled like children.

  “It’s the other bottle of champagne I ordered,” I whispered.

  He lifted me off his lap, grabbed his boxers from the floor, and pulled them on before opening the door. He was back in seconds and poured us both a glass. He sat on the bed with his back against the headboard, I kicked off my shoes and I crawled up his body again so I was straddling him, before I lifted one of the two glasses from his grasp.

  “Here’s to my beautiful, amazing, sexy shoed wife and her dickhead of a husband. I’m so sorry for what I said on the phone. It’s no excuse, but I was scared, angry, and just missing you so fucking much. I lashed out, and I shouldn’t have.” He kissed my lips, chin, eyelids, and cheeks as he spoke. “Thank you so much for coming. How long do I get to keep you?”

  I smiled against his lips that were pressed against mine.

  “As long as you need me.”

  “You took unpaid leave?”

  I let out a long breath.

  “I handed in my notice.”

  “Babe . . .”

  “It’s okay.” I shrugged. “I wasn’t sure how long we’d be here for and seeing as how I didn’t bother packing my pills, and you plan on having me pregnant within a month, I didn’t think it was fair to mess them about.”

  I pushed his hair back and looked over his face, waiting on a reaction. His eyes were bloodshot, and he had dark circles beneath them. I felt so guilty right then. None of what he’d been having to deal with over here could’ve been easy, and I’d done nothing to help the pressure.

  He stared right at me but didn’t respond to what I’d just told him.

  “I can call and retract my resignation if you don’t—”

  He kissed me again, silently demanding I not finish my statement and making me spill my champagne.

  “Let’s start making babies, Sarah. Lots, I want lots. Four—no, six at least.”

  “Four or six? Six kids?” I groaned out as his mouth took in my nipple and his thumb rubbed over my clit.

  He put down his glass and took my free hand, wrapping it around his dick, which was hard again.

  “At least,” he stated as we both looked down at what we were doing to each other.

  “Did I tell you how much I love you?”

  “No. Not ever.”

  “Then I’ll just have to show you.”

  “I thought that was the whole reason you stepped over here when you first came through the door.”

  “I best get on with it then.”

  And so he did. We drank. We fucked. Then, at some point, we showered, ate, and then fucked again. We were both naked sweaty, tired, and just a little bit drunk. Liam’s front was pressed into my back as he spooned me from behind. My skin and my hair smelt of me, him, and sex. I felt beyond relaxed and extremely happy and content when Liam whispered, “Everything feels better now that you’re here, pretty girl. My heart beats stronger, and I feel like I can breathe properly for the first time in two weeks.” He kissed my shoulder before continuing, “Everything about my life is better because of you. Thanks for coming all this way to be with me. Thanks for being my wife and wanting to make babies with me.”

  He then made love to me slowly, gently, reverently. Our marriage was well and truly consummated by the following morning.

  It was late September before we arrived back in England. The company had been cleared of any blame at that stage, but a full enquiry would be carried out the following year.

  I spent so
me of my time in Australia just hanging about Liam’s hotel and waiting for him to get home. I had also flown back to Perth for a few days and spent time with his mum and sisters in his old hometown. They showed me around the beaches and bars where Liam used to hang out, and I even saw the house he still owned, which he used to share with Olivia.

  I had an irrational girl moment then. He was mine, and we were married, happy, and very much in love. But my belly still set itself on a spin cycle whenever I thought about his life before he met me.

  Maggie told me that Olivia had a little boy the previous March and was living alone back in Sydney. Apparently, Olivia wasn’t coping well with motherhood and the impact it had on her social life so her baby was living nearby with her parents, who were raising him. Call it morbid curiosity or a plain ol’ female thing, but every time we went into town, I desperately wanted to bump into Olivia’s parents, just to take a look at the child myself. I believed he wasn’t Liam’s, but I just wanted to see him for myself. We never saw them, though.

  Right before we left Australia, we managed a “mini” honeymoon and took a guided trip to the Kimberley, an area at the very top end of Western Australia and possibly the most beautiful place on the earth. We’d visited Windjana Gorge National Park, where we’d spent time riding four-wheelers, visiting caves, searching for fossils, and taking sunset boat rides. We visited ancient settlements, where I learned a lot about indigenous Australians and their culture, I saw crocodile’s in the wild, and more birds than I had ever seen in my life.

  I’d always considered myself a complete homebody, but after spending over a month in Australia, I figured that as long as Liam was with me, it was somewhere I could most definitely call home.

  ***

  I had spent my days since returning from Australia shopping for Christmas and putting the finishing touches to our house. Liam threatened to smother me with the next cushion, pillow, or throw he came home to, but I figured he was secretly pleased with the way the house looked, not that he seemed to be there much.

  He warned me at the very beginning he would have to put in the hours for the first few years, and I totally understood that the business was still growing and establishing, but it sucked big time regardless. I was not sure if it was because I was at home all day or if it was that we were newlyweds and I just wanted to spend every minute with him, but as each week passed, Liam seemed to spend more and more time at the office. I couldn’t remember him doing this as much before we were married, but that was probably because I was still working myself and just didn’t notice it so much. He’d been going in on the odd Saturday morning and even on a Sunday evening if there was something important he needed to discuss with the Australian team. Time zones were another thing that sucked. Why couldn’t we all wake up and go to be at the same time? It would make life so much easier.

  I was very much regretting giving up work and had decided that if I didn’t fall pregnant by Christmas, I would go and look for some kind of part-time job in January. I was even thinking of asking Liam or Luke if they had anything I could help with. At least that way I would get to see my husband a little more often.

  I wasn’t sure that would be any better, though. The few times I’d turned up at the office with lunch, both Liam and Luke had eaten at their desks so they could keep working at the same time. It was boring. I’d expected a bit of banter from the two, but after the fifth or sixth time of having to sit and listen to them receive and respond to endless phone calls, I stopped bothering to turn up unannounced.

  I tried arranging to meet Liam out for lunch, but he always ended up cancelling at the last minute. The last time I tried that, he completely forgot and left me sitting and waiting on my own for an hour before I gave up calling his mobile and finally called the office.

  It was Mel that picked up and told me he was on a conference call and would ring me back later, which made me feel just great. I felt even worse when he never called me back and came home after I was asleep that night. In the morning, he was gone before I woke up.

  I was bored with time on my hands, but these things happened I supposed. Tomorrow was Saturday, and I was hoping that Liam would take the day off so that we could go get a tree. I’d also like him to be present in the morning when I took the pregnancy test I went out and bought earlier.

  I was lying on the sofa, watching the flames flicker in the fireplace, and listening to Leona Lewis sing about bleeding love when my phone vibrated.

  Aussie Husband: Hey, pretty girl. You missing me? X

  Me: More than you would know! X

  I felt my nose sting and tears burned my eyes as I typed. I let the loneliness of missing him wash right over me then. I thought once we were back from Australia things would settle down and we’d get ourselves back into the routine we were in before the wedding. Back then, we’d often meet up straight from work for dinner, but we hadn’t done that in a long while. I felt as though I was just expected to sit around and wait for him to be free so we could see each other. We were newlyweds, shouldn’t I have been at the top of his list, his priority? Or did thinking like that just make me selfish?

  I missed him. It was that simple. I wanted what we had when we were sneaking around behind my brother’s back. I wanted the nights out in bars and museums, theatres and art galleries. I wanted to drink too much and sing karaoke in front of people we didn’t know. Instead, all I seemed to do was sit at home and wait for my husband to remember I even existed. It didn’t help that Sasha was working all sorts of overtime so that she could take four weeks off over Christmas to go to Australia and spend time with Shain. That made it so I had barely seen anything of her over the last month, apart from the odd text, we’d hardley had a single conversation. They’d been working at keeping a long-distance relationship going, but I wasn’t sure if it was gonna work. Perhaps that was just me being selfish—again—and wanting to keep her all to myself, but we’d had a couple of nights out with him while I was over in Australia, and it was only then I noticed how much of a flirt he was and how often his head was turned when a pretty girl walked by.

  Aussie Husband: We have one more conference call, and then I should be home. I think we may have won the contract. X

  That really was good news, and I let out a breath that loosened the knot in my stomach. The business had been busy the last few weeks, and Liam had been putting together a proposal to supply oil rig workers to offshore platforms around Australia. Once again, because of the time difference, it meant a lot of late nights and early mornings; hopefully, this would now be the end of it.

  Me: That’s fantastic. Shall I order some takeaway? X

  My phone rang thirty seconds later.

  “Hey, bub, sorry, I didn’t realise I was gonna have this long to talk, otherwise I would’ve just called in the first place.”

  “That’s okay, it’s just good to hear your voice.”

  “What you up to?”

  “I’ve just finished my pole dancing class, so now I’m off to the strip club to put my moves into practice.”

  I could hear him speaking to someone in the background.

  “Sorry, gotta go, bub. I’ll be home as soon as I can. Love ya.”

  The call cut off before I could reply.

  “Love you, too,” I said anyway, reminding myself that I shouldn’t get upset.

  My phone vibrated while it was still in my hand.

  Aussie Husband: Don’t worry about takeaway. Mel just arrived with Chinese. X

  Yeah. Of course she fucking did.

  Good ol’ Mel!

  I sat up and my head spun, making me feel sick. I wasn’t sure if it was the speed with which I moved or rage that caused it, so I stared into the fire for a few long moments and took a few deep breaths to calm myself. When I was sure I wasn’t going to throw up, I stood and made my way to the kitchen. Since I was eating alone . . . again, I made myself a milky hot chocolate and two slices of Nutella on toast. Then, I headed up to bed with the book about sparkling vampires everyone was r
aving about and fell asleep reading it sometime later.

  I had a vague recollection of Liam pulling my back into his chest and the smell of alcohol invading my senses at some stage during the night, but I woke to an empty bed in the morning.

  Feeling thoroughly pissed off, I decided to take the pregnancy test alone.

  “Well fuck him, I’ll do it by myself.” I said aloud to my empty house as I sat up and attempted to swing my legs over the side of the bed. Just as my feet hit the floor, white light exploded across my vision and a blinding headache caused the room to spin. I squeezed my eyes closed and pressed my palms to my temples as my stomach rolled and my mouth started to water. A cold sweat broke out over my face and my whole body felt too hot.

  I sat very still on the side of my bed for a few long moments and waited for things to settle. My headache receded to just a dull ache at the base of my skull, but I still felt nauseous. Opening my eyes very slowly, I stood, grabbed by phone, made my way over to my underwear drawer, and pulled out the home pregnancy test hidden there.

  The instructions were easy enough: pee on the stick, slide on the cover, and set it down on the side of the sink. I followed them, then washed my hands and set the timer on my phone for two minutes. I forced myself to watch the seconds count down instead of spending the time staring at the plastic stick. As the timer hit the two-minute mark, I had a moment of panic. I shouldn’t have done this. I should’ve waited until Liam was here, this was big news, we should be—

  My phone rang, and I actually let out a small squeak as I jumped at the sound. Sasha’s name was on the screen, but I knew I couldn’t talk to her. She would be all too aware that I was up to something. Plus, I was a terrible liar, or faker, whatever I would be doing if I were to pick up, so I sent the call to voice mail.

  My insides felt as if they were twisting themselves into knots as I debated what I should do.