The “Metal Horns,” Dude!
I was so excited about what now was happening in my life that after years, I reached out to my old friend Paul Peters, the former AWOL frontman, to tell him all about it.
It was great to reconnect with Paul and he seemed genuinely happy about my spiritual arrival. He was also eager to inform me that he was currently handling audio production for East Coast Christian Center (ECCC), located in Merritt Island, Florida, which was about thirty minutes north of where I was living in Satellite Beach. Paul began telling me of the unique and bold ministry being presented at ECCC and how Senior Pastor Dan Stallbaum actually had used The Beatles’ music as part of a recent series on relationships. Beatles music? At church? “Where do I sign up?” I asked Paul. We met for coffee at a local Starbucks a few days later and Paul invited me to attend a service at ECCC the following Sunday – I happily accepted his invitation.
With its state-of-the-art video and audio production, huge concert-type stage and five hundred-plus capacity main worship hall, ECCC more closely resembles The House of Blues than a traditional church. I noticed during my first ECCC experience that despite my long hair, piercings and tattoos, I appeared to be one of the more conservative-looking people in that morning’s congregation. In fact, there were throngs of folks in attendance wearing T-shirts and jeans, sporting an array of fabulous tattoos and piercings. And as I spotted a line of Harleys parked out front, I wasn’t sure if I was at church or a Doobie Brothers concert!
I also discovered an earplug dispenser attached to the back wall of the main worship hall. Earplugs? At church? I asked Paul’s wife Kim about this oddity and she explained that the church recently had been faced with an ultimatum – either turn down the volume of the Praise and Worship service or provide earplugs. “And there’s NO way we’re turning down the music!” Kim passionately informed me. The proverbial icing on the cake was when I passed an innocent-looking five or six-year-old girl, holding her mother’s hand, walking out of the service. As I made eye contact with the adorable little blond girl, wearing a flowered print dress and bobby socks with saddle oxfords, she flashed me the “metal horns.” The metal horns? At church? No one had ever flashed me the universally acknowledged hand symbol for heavy metal, before, during or after any worship service! After thirty-plus years of feeling like a leper at other churches, I fit right in at ECCC.
******
CHAPTER ELEVEN
Adrenaline Rush
I’ve spent pretty much my entire life connected to the music industry. And despite my spiritual awakening, I continue to have a passion for music. I believe that music is a gift from God (yes, even rock and roll). And unlike my Sunday school teachers back in the ‘70s, I certainly am not suddenly going to condemn rock music – I’ll always be a rocker at heart. However, I will say that by the summer of 2010, the music of Led Zeppelin and AC/DC no longer was speaking to me as it once did. So I began seeking out new sounds that rocked from artists with an edge, but who also could spiritually offer me something more satisfying than my longtime secular favorites. And as I made these subsequent discoveries, I gleefully promoted them through my various feature stories, reviews and websites.
I also no longer was interested in the typical shock jock-type content of my former favorite radio stations – I simply had lost interest in hearing lowbrow penis jokes and details of upcoming area wet T-shirt promotions. And except for tuning in to catch headlines on the local Fox News station, I now was listening to my hometown Christian station, 91.5 FM WMIE, almost exclusively.
The Word
I always had perceived most modern day contemporary Christian music as being either too vanilla-sounding for my taste, or mere churched-up knock-offs of current secular hit makers who bored me. I loved the message, but I wanted to hear music that was more unique, personal and compelling than what I thought was being offered. I wanted to discover new artists who could thwack me like Steve Taylor did back in 1984. But my expectations were kinda low – that is until I discovered Sara Groves.
I was driving along the highway in May, listening to WMIE, when I heard a wonderfully edgy little pop song by a female singer. Like many radio stations, WMIE rarely announces artists or song titles, so I literally had to steer my car with my knees as I jotted down key lyrics of the song on a piece of scrap paper. When I got home, I immediately started making calls to various Christian friends who I thought could solve the mystery. Once again, I reached out to Paul Peters who put me in touch with his wife. Kim knew exactly what song I was talking about. She informed me that the artist was Springfield, Missouri native Sara Groves and the song was called, “The Word.” I immediately went online and ordered Sara’s Conversations CD that included “The Word.” In my world, screaming vocals and distorted guitar sounds are not prerequisites for having an edge. It’s all about being bold, unique and honest. It also has to do with telling a good story. First and foremost, Sara Groves is an amazing storyteller. As if she were telling my story, her music hit home in a chilling way. Thwack!
Soon, I had purchased several Sara Groves records and I listened to little else all summer. But one artist does not a comprehensive collection make, and I continued seeking new music from other edgy inspirational artists.
It’s been a hard year, but I’m
climbing out of the rubble.
These lessons are hard –
healing changes are subtle.
From “Less Like Scars” – Written by Sara Groves and Nate Sabin
Chick-a-cha!
I was sitting in church at ECCC one Sunday in September when I heard a distinctive song playing over the sound system before the morning service. Although it was a rather mellow-sounding, acoustic-based tune, it definitely had an “edge.” Paul and Kim Peters recently had relocated to Destin, Florida so I slipped a note to Bill Munsey, the new church soundman, inquiring about the artist. He immediately motioned me into the production booth and showed me the screen on his iPhone indicating the song was called “Yahweh” by Tal & Acacia. Upon returning home after the service, I went online and Googled Tal & Acacia. I discovered that the act is a Portland, Maine-based duo comprised of sister songwriters Talitha and Acacia Walters-Wulfing, and the song “Yahweh” appeared on their newly released debut record, Wake Me. As I surfed the Internet seeking additional information on Tal & Acacia, I discovered various audio and video clips promoting their music. Their fun, high energy, three minute, get-to-the-hook pop songs hit me like a double shot of adrenaline – similar to hearing some of my current secular pop favorites such as Duffy and Adele for the first time. I immediately ordered Tal & Acacia’s record online and it has become one of my all-time favorites. In fact, I jokingly told a friend I was going to Krazy Glue Wake Me into my car CD player so that it never could be removed! Actually, I was only half-joking.
The time is now to leave the junk behind.
The moment has arrived where
I no longer am blind.
From “Garbage In” – Written by Talitha Walters-Wulfing
Lonely Wheel
ECCC would prove to be a continued valuable source for discovering new music. One night, just before service, I was drawn to a cool rock video playing on the church’s wide screens. With the band’s snappy, edgy sound and the lead singer’s mane of unkempt red hair, they reminded me of the ‘90s combo, Soul Asylum, and I immediately was thwacked – again!
I noticed Bradley Morris, one of the church’s acknowledged cool kids, standing in the back of the worship hall as the video played. Bradley frequently played guitar in ECCC’s youth band and he’s the kind of guitarist who I would have described in my past life as a bona fide bad ass – consequently, I approached him in hopes of getting the scoop on my new musical discovery.
Over the blasting music in the background, Bradley informed me that the song was entitled, “Lonely Wheel.” He further schooled me, adding that the group was called The Almost and was founded and fronted by Aaron Gillespie, the former drummer of the Florida-based
Christian metal band, Underoath.
Of course I once again went home that night and did some additional Internet research on The Almost. I discovered a host of their online video and audio clips. As a fan of bands such as The Used and Taking Back Sunday, the more I heard of The Almost, the more intense the “thwacking” became. And before I knew it, I’d begun purchasing numerous tracks from the band to add to my iTunes library. I now was discovering many exciting new Christian rock bands, such as The Letter Black, Superchick and Disciple. But in my book, The Almost reigned supreme!
One last night at the lonely wheel –
One last taste of the sin we feel
One hope in the fear that drives us on –
One last drink just to kill the pain
One last breath before I say your name
From “Lonely Wheel” – Written by Aaron Gillespie,
Dusty Redmon, Alex Aponti & Jay Vilardi
*******
CHAPTER TWELVE
Weapon of Choice
Despite my recent experiences, I would continue to find one certain temptation lurking around every corner, rearing its ugly head, fangs and all. That’s how it works, folks. Life doesn’t always get easier the closer you get to God. Satan is a crafty dude. He knows our weaknesses and knows exactly how and when to zap us.
Girls, Girls, Girls
I finally was walking in the light after the spring of 2010. But I still was vulnerable to one particular temptation from my past. So what could have possibly been my Achilles’ heel? What was my one area of personal weakness that could trip me up most in my new spiritual journey? Hmm. Any guesses? Anyone? Bingo – that’s the one! My primary addiction – my weapon of choice (after getting sober) following my divorce in 1998 was sex. I don’t admit this to boast, but merely to illustrate how God can fix our hearts. And be sure, I now regret how I had conducted myself over the last decade. Battling alcohol was one thing; sex, however, was an entirely different demon. The truth is, there was no satisfying my sexual desires. From backstage to backseats to backrooms to back alleys – from single girls to married women – short and tall, big and small, younger and older – no setting was inappropriate and to me, any woman was fair game.
But as I got further into God’s Word in 2010, I found myself no longer being consumed by or even interested in sexually pursuing women. I now was moved to live life God’s way. However, once sex was no longer my objective and I finally began conducting myself in a responsible, non-pig-like manner, women seemed to have little interest in hanging out with me. Those who I still encountered from my former life were clearly not attracted to the new me and the ones I was meeting at church merely perceived me as the weird new guy who wore fingernail polish and sat in the back of the worship hall on Sundays. But now, I didn’t even care. Due to my new, biblically inspired outlook, I simply found life easier to manage without constantly shucking and jiving chicks into bed and then dealing with all of the post-liaison drama. Said drama typically involved last week’s conquest following me to work at the club for the next few nights and ultimately thwarting this week’s mission – not to mention the subsequent threatening phone calls from their various past and present husbands and boyfriends. I now found the whole thing to be kinda gross and completely stupid.
Throw off your old sinful nature and yourformer way of life, which is corrupted by lust and deception. Instead, let the spirit renew your thoughtsand attitudes. Put on your new nature, createdto be like God – truly righteous and holy.
Ephesians 4:22-24 (NLT)
Pole Position
There was a stunningly beautiful girl in her late twenties named Tabatha who I knew in Melbourne. I was familiar with Tabitha from the local rock scene and I’d been extremely attracted to her for a couple of years. She was about five-foot-nine and slender with dark skin and golden highlights running through her long brown hair. I often have been told that I’m only attracted to “Barbies,” and although I adamantly disagree with that assessment, Tabitha certainly did fit that characterization.
Although we kept in regular contact with each other, our relationship never moved beyond friendship status because one of us always was dating while the other was single. I called Tabitha one day in June simply to say, “Hello.” She quickly informed me that she’d broken up recently with her longtime boyfriend. Coincidentally, I too had just ended a romantic relationship. Could it be? Finally Tabitha and I both were available at the same time! Now here’s the kicker. Upon hearing of her availability, I didn’t try to hook up with her. In fact, during that conversation I started telling Tabitha about how I was now living for God. I even confessed to becoming one of those Bible-reading weirdoes at Starbucks. I further apologized to her for what I now perceived as my occasionally inappropriate past behavior in her presence. And instead of inquiring as to what she was wearing, per my former pig-like mentality, I invited her to attend church with me. Surprisingly, Tabitha confessed to me that she too had been feeling a real need for God in her life and agreed to accompany me to church – sometime.
I didn’t hear from Tabitha for a week or two, so I called her back and asked her out on a proper date. She accepted and I was delighted. As I drove to Tabitha’s apartment to pick her up, I couldn’t help but be enthusiastic. I’d been interested in her for years and we now both were single and also on the same page spiritually, or so I thought.
Tabitha never appeared as fetching as she did when she greeted me at her front door that Saturday night. Hooray for me! But upon entering her apartment, the first thing I noticed was that she had what some people could perceive as a stripper pole installed in the middle of her living room. YIKES! Not wanting to rush to judgment, I thought to myself, maybe her apartment building had once been a firehouse and it was considered too costly or problematic to have the pole removed. Yeah, that’s it. And just maybe the old firehouse Dalmatian would come running into the room at any moment and jump in my lap. Yeah, that made perfect sense. Finally, I had to inquire about the oddity. Tabitha proudly informed me that it was, in fact, a stripper pole and that she enjoyed using it during her home parties. She also offered to demonstrate it for me later. “Demonstrate?” Uh-oh! Apparently Tabitha didn’t quite comprehend the full meaning of our previous phone conversation, and perhaps I hadn’t read her correctly either.
Although (I think) we both had a fabulous time at the movies that night, I didn’t accept Tabitha’s offer to come inside when we arrived back at her place. In fact, I merely pulled up to her building and immediately sped off after exchanging our “good nights.”
I discovered that a seductive woman
is a trap more bitter than death.
Her passion is a snare, and her
soft hands are chains.
Those who are pleasing to God will escape
her, but sinners will be caught in her snare.
Ecclesiastes 7:26 (NLT)
When I say that Tabitha was beautiful, I mean supermodel beautiful. Sure, I now was living for God, but I also was still human and vulnerable to temptation. And I knew the old me well enough to recognize that had I gone back in Tabitha’s apartment after our date, there was a real chance that I could have caved in. I wasn’t willing to take that risk. And it was no easy call to make. For me to drive away from Tabitha that night was like a cocaine junkie turning down a line of the finest Peruvian blow. But it was the right call.
Run from anything that stimulates youthful lusts. Instead, pursue righteous living, faithfulness, love and peace.
2 Timothy 2:22 (NLT)
“I Like You as a Friend, But…”
Ah, the ultimate rejection line. I remember first being on the receiving end of this infamous, backhanded sentiment in the sixth grade. In one breath, Jacque Rodgers broke my heart. The offer of friendship was of little solace then and those words would continue to sting each time I heard them throughout my life. However, once I finally eliminated sex from the equation in 2010 and no longer had to navigate through the complexities of pursuing and
maintaining romantic relationships, I finally could appreciate what a beautiful gift true friendship really is.
If you’re just friends, you typically can enjoy a lifetime connection to people whom you truly care about. But once you become someone’s “ex” or booty call, emotions get in the way and relationships become splintered. A friend always can look you in the eye and admit that the dress really does make you look fat. And friends can usually call each other in time of need without current “significants” feeling threatened. As a rule, an “ex” can’t. Although at forty-eight I could count many “ex’s” among my best friends, I’ve remained closest to those whom I’d not been romantically connected.
Candy’s Room
Although I now was enjoying many newfound professional opportunities, I still was working fulltime as a nightclub DJ during the holiday season of 2010. I was no longer compelled to participate in the shenanigans of my working environment, however, I still found myself in a few amusing situations. Fortunately, I now responded differently than I would have just a few months earlier.
C’MON! – My Story of Rock, Ruin and Revelation Page 14