by Pj Fiala
***
Tammy stood back, admiring her work. It looked good, very good. All she managed to do today was a bit of touch-up. Her creative juices just weren’t flowing. She laid her brush on the table and picked up the rag lying alongside her paints. As she was wiping the paint from her fingers, she heard the door open and quietly close. She turned to see Sally, the director of the veteran’s home, and her boss, walking toward her, her posture unusually stiff and her face molded into a frown.
“It looks beautiful, Tammy. You’re very talented.”
Tammy’s lips turned up at the corners as she looked back at the mural of veterans in various wars up to present day. She’d been working on this mural for the past few months.
“Almost finished. I still need to add Operation Enduring Freedom to it.”
So far, there weren’t any veterans here from this war. That’s why she waited to paint it last. She’d spoken to many of the veterans here before embarking on her mural painting journey. She wanted to paint the scenes accurately and many of the veterans were very helpful in sharing their experiences and more than willing to help her convey their story properly. She learned so much from these men. Their strength and endurance was astounding.
“There’s time.” Sally took a deep breath. “Tammy, is everything okay with you?”
Tammy’s shoulders sagged as she turned to face Sally. Blowing stray strands of hair out of her face, Tammy flopped in a chair at the table.
“What did you hear?” Sad brown eyes turned to Sally as she took the seat next to Tammy. For a forty-nine-year-old woman, she was very attractive. She’d paid little attention to her hair and looks the past few years since her husband had died. She consistently dressed in business suits and flats, while her hair was blonde and bobbed, with a sprinkling of gray showing through. Tammy wondered why she didn’t color it. Her mom wouldn’t be caught dead with gray hair—not yet, anyway.
“I saw the video.”
Tammy’s hands flew to her face to hide as she wailed, “No. Oh, my God, no.”
CHAPTER 3
“DANNY, I COULD USE your help. You’re so good at figuring this stuff out. Can you come over and help me?”
Hesitating, Danny asked his brother, “Ahh, when do you want to work on it?”
“Today. Grace is working and I want to surprise her. I don’t have any patients today, so anytime you can get here would be great.”
Danny looked around his house; he didn’t have anything going on.
”You haven’t left your house in three weeks, Danny. You have to leave it sometime. Please don’t make yourself a recluse. Let us help you. We love you and worry so much about you.” Softening his voice, Paul said, “Please…I want things to be the way they used to be.”
Biting down his anger, Danny said. “Things will never be the way they used to be again, Paul. I lost my fucking leg. Women think I’m disgusting. People stare at me when I leave the house like there’s something wrong with me. I have fucking nightmares all the time. Things…” Taking another deep breath, Danny softly added, “Things are different. We can’t change that.”
Paul looked down at the floor and his scuffed shoes. Frustration bubbled to the surface. He had two and his brother only one. Fucking war. Fucking terrorists.
“Danny.” Shit. “Danny, you’re still you. Your body is different, but you’re still my brother and I still love you. I love you more, not because you lost a leg, but because you sacrificed for all of us to protect what we have here. That’s a debt we can never repay, bro. But, you‘re still the same caring, loving man you were and, you’re going to be an uncle and we need you, man.” Catching the sob trying to escape from his throat, Paul continued. “You’re still you.”
Danny swiped at the tears falling down his cheeks. He lost his leg almost a year ago and it was the first time he’d cried. He looked down at his scarred tennis shoe and watched one of his tears hit the toe and slide to the side. Shit.
“I’ll be over in half an hour. Do you need me to bring any tools?”
Letting out the breath he was holding, Paul said, “I think I have everything we need. Thanks, bro.”
Danny touched the end call button on his phone and slid it into his shirt pocket. He walked to the stairs going up to the second floor and his bedroom and made the laborious trek upstairs. He would need his prosthetic leg today.
***
“How the hell do you read these damn directions? This is crazy. It’s a crib for fuck’s sake. There must be a thousand pieces to put together. How big do you think this baby is going to be anyway?”
Paul burst out laughing. “Now you know why I needed you here. It’s mind-boggling.”
They worked in unison for some time, pulling pieces out of the pile and organizing them in a way that would be easy to find. Paul held the directions and read them step-by-step as Danny put the pieces together one by one. Three and a half hours later, they stood back and admired the beautiful mocha colored crib and attached dresser. It stood straight and tall and the brothers were proud of their accomplishment. Paul was proud of Danny. He slid his arm around Danny’s shoulders and squeezed.
“Thank you so much, bro. Look what we did! It’s beautiful. Thanks.”
“I’m home,” Grace called from the front room. “What are you two doing?”
Paul looked at Danny and smiled. “She’s gonna squeal, get ready.”
Turning his head toward the door he called back, “We’re in the baby’s room. Come on back and see what we did.”
Paul and Danny stood together as they were, an arm around the other’s shoulder, continuing to admire their handiwork when Grace rounded the corner and stopped dead in her tracks. They both looked at her, waiting for her reaction. She stared at the crib and attached dresser, frozen in place. Danny’s heart began to race the longer it took Grace to speak. He fidgeted a bit and ran his hand across his jaw…waiting.
Grace finally looked at them and they saw a lone tear slide down her cheek.
Softly, while walking toward the crib, Grace said, “Thank you so much. It’s…” She took a deep breath and swallowed. “It’s beautiful.”
She gently ran her hand along the cool, smooth wooden crib and lovingly caressed the rails. She leaned in and patted the mattress when a sob escaped. Danny stood straighter and stiffened his spine. He never knew what to do when a woman cried. He looked over at Paul, the worry etched on Danny’s face.
Paul snickered. “I thought she’d squeal. Damn hormones make it impossible to predict a thing.”
Grace turned toward them, wiping her cheeks and smiled. She threw herself at Paul, pushing him against the wall, wrapping her arms around his neck and loudly kissing him. “Thank you. I was worried the baby was going to be sleeping on the floor. You weren’t too keen on putting this together.”
Paul laughed. “I couldn’t get my head around all the damn pieces. Danny did ninety-nine percent of the work. I just read the directions.”
Grace pulled her arms away from Paul and looked at Danny, a smile spread across her face. Danny’s face still held the tension from moments before, his brown eyes watching Grace’s beautiful blue ones. She stepped forward and hugged him tightly. Danny slowly drew his arms around her thick middle and hugged her back. Tears filled his eyes. The strength of her embrace, the smell of her perfume, the softness of her curves. He missed being hugged.
Grace heard him sniffle and stood back and looked at him. “You okay?”
Danny’s watery gaze held hers for long moments. Unable to say a word, he swallowed and nodded.
“What’s wrong, Danny?” Grace softly inquired.
Danny shook his head. Grace held his face in her hands directing his gaze to hers. Softly but firmly she said, “What’s wrong. Danny?”
“It’s just…” Flicking his gaze to Paul and back to Grace, he said, “That’s the first hug I’ve had from a woman—who isn’t my mom—in months. Sorry. It felt good.”
CHAPTER 4
“DON’T BE SO
NERVOUS, Tammy. No one from The Wheel comes here. Now loosen up and let’s have some fun.”
“Sorry, Molly. I don’t mean to be a drag, I’m just so darn paranoid that everyone here saw that damn video and thinks I’m trash. This past year has been horrible.”
“I know it has, Tam, and I’ve been with you all the way. Those bitches at the restaurant last week were just jealous. Not one of them has the body you have—they just wish they did.”
“You’re good for my ego, Molly, I’ll give you that.”
Molly laughed and pulled Tammy out on the dance floor. They danced to Taylor Swift’s “Shake it Off.” Tammy’s lime-green sheath dress hugged her body like a glove. Black heels and a cuff bracelet caught the lights as she swung her arms to the music. They both wore beautiful smiles as they wrapped themselves in the music, forgetting everything disappointing and hurtful in their lives. Molly’s short dark hair was beginning to curl at the nape as she started heating up from all the dancing. The little dots of moisture began appearing across Tammy’s nose indicated she was warm as well. At the end of the third song, Tammy lifted her long, wavy, sandy-brown hair off her neck and fanned her face with her hand.
“I need a drink. I think I’m melting.” Tammy laughed.
“I know what you mean. Let’s go cool down.”
Both girls walked to their table alongside the dance floor and ordered a drink from the passing waitress. Tammy looked up and noticed a table of very nice specimens of the opposite sex staring at them. She felt her blush all the way to her toes. Watching the waitress weave in and out of patrons, Tammy noticed another table of men watching them. The waitress set their drinks in front of them, and Tammy immediately pulled her credit card from her clutch and handed it to her.
“I’ll be right back with your receipt,” the waitress said.
Tammy looked at Molly and said as softly as she could and still be heard over the music, “There are two tables of guys staring at us. I’m starting to feel a bit freaked out. Is it me? Do you think they know about the video? Ugh. I hate feeling paranoid.”
Molly took a deep breath, slowly let it out and looked across the room at the first table of guys. They were indeed looking in Tammy and Molly’s direction. It looked like about five of them standing around drinking and talking. The tall, dark-haired guy nudged his shorter, blond companion, who started laughing and shaking his head no.
“Well, they’re definitely looking at us. But, I think it’s more that they can’t work up the courage to come over and ask us to dance. The short one just turned a few shades of red when they tall one said something to him. Probably that.”
Tammy looked over at them then. Her gaze met the tall blond standing at the back of the table. He smiled and winked. Tammy smiled back and blushed.
Pushing the sleeves of her gray sweater dress up her arms to help her cool down, Molly said, “See? They just think you’re sexy.”
Tammy glanced over at the other table of guys and noticed them trying to be sly, but still watching them. “They think you’re sexy, Molly. The guy at that table…” she said with a jerk of her head, her curls swaying, “is definitely watching you.”
A smiled spread across Molly's face. “Well, tonight’s about us. Finish your drink and let’s hit the dance floor, girl.”
Molly tossed back the last of her drink. Tammy smirked and did the same. Taking to the dance floor once more they shimmied and shook to several more songs. Their friends, Cara, and Suzy, met them during the fourth song. The girls danced and laughed. As they walked back to their table, Tammy noticed the tall, dark-haired guy sauntering towards them. The girls were smiling as he rested his elbows on the table. He looked across the table directly at Tammy, his blue eyes shining and the hint of a dimple in his right cheek.
“We couldn’t keep our eyes off you ladies. Great dancing out there.”
Molly smiled and looked at Tammy. Tammy looked into those blue eyes and smiled. “We noticed you all watching. So, what’s the story?”
“No story. Would love a dance with you myself. Would you dance with me?”
Taking a sip of her drink, Tammy watched for sincerity in his eyes. When he didn’t look away, she nodded. “Absolutely. But, I’d like to know your name first.”
Laughing, he held out his right hand, “Name’s Joel. What’s yours?”
Tammy placed her right hand in his and said, “I’m Tammy. Nice to meet you.” Nodding toward Molly, she said, “This is my best friend, Molly.” Looking at her friends, she introduced them. “This is Cara and this is Suzy.”
“Nice to meet you, ladies.” Hearing the music slow down, he turned on a mischievous smile and said to Tammy, “Shall we?”
He walked around the table and took Tammy’s hand, leading her out to the dance floor. Turning toward her, he wrapped his arm around her and pulled her close. As they swayed to the music, he bent his head down close to her ear. “My friends and I have a bet going. I think you look just like a girl in a video I recently saw. Want to make another one?”
Tammy froze. She pulled away and stared directly into the bastard’s eyes. “Fuck you!” She turned and stomped off the dance floor, Joel yelling after her.
“I just offered, you stupid bitch. It’s not like it’s your first time.”
Molly stood taller when she saw Tammy’s posture and the look on her face. Tammy reached the table and grabbed her purse off the back of the chair. “I’m out of here. Fucker wanted to know if I wanted to make another video. I can’t do this anymore.”
Molly grabbed her purse and quickly said to Cara and Suzy, “I’ll go home with Tammy.”
CHAPTER 5
“HEY, REMEMBER ME telling you Joci hired me to take pictures at the house of the veteran who received the funds collected at the Veteran’s Ride? I need to take pictures before the build so we can show before and after shots. Come with me, Tammy, and then we can go out and grab a bite to eat afterwards. We can call Cara and Suzie and ask them to meet us,” Molly spoke into her phone.
“Okay. I’ll be over in about half an hour. I want to change my clothes before I come to your place.”
“Sounds great. Hurry, I don’t want to miss the sun setting.”
Tammy pressed the “end call” button on her phone as she walked to her bedroom to change.
The past few months had been a trial. Tammy was finally starting to feel like her old self again. The last couple of times she and Molly went out, she didn’t feel like people were staring and pointing anymore. Of course, they were frequenting different bars, so nobody knew them. Last weekend they went to The Barn where Molly got wasted and Ryder, Molly’s new boyfriend, took her home. Tammy, Cara, and Suzie left shortly after that without incident.
Molly and Tammy walked the perimeter of Danny Schaefer’s house. The sun was low in the sky and the lighting was phenomenal. Molly captured the setting sun and the light peeking through the trees in Danny’s yard. There was a gorgeous flower garden. The summer flowers had long since died, but these fall flowers, mums in burgundy and deep orange, and several varieties of kale, were so pretty. Molly stopped taking pictures of the house long enough to snap a few pictures of the flowers with the sun laying low in the background. Oh, some of these were definite screensaver shots. Molly was lying on her belly to get close-ups of the flowers. Tammy smiled as she watched Molly in her element.
***
Danny was looking through the photo album his mom put together for him. Bittersweet. That’s the only word to describe it. He was standing tall and proud as his mom buttoned the cord onto his shoulder on graduation day. Boot camp had been a bitch. It was hot in Georgia, and he’d spent three and a half months outside doing pushups, sit-ups, running, marching, shooting, and anything else his drill sergeants could think up. He’d loved every minute of it and had made good friends, too. Lex, short for Lexington, the city he came from, and Coop, short for Cooper, were the best. As he flipped the pages and watched the smile on his mom’s face looking up to him, he smiled. Those were the
days. On that day especially, he was proud. So damn proud. He did it. He finished boot camp. He excelled at everything they threw at him. It was the first time in his life he felt like he belonged. In school, he wasn’t sports-minded or academic. He got along with everyone, but he never felt like he “fit in.” He was a total motor-head. If it had a motor and burned gas, he was all over it.
Turning the page again, he came to a picture of himself standing with Kathryn. He’d just come home from boot camp and she was waiting for him. She was so damn beautiful to look at, but she was a cold fish. She didn’t like sex and he usually had to do a fair amount of begging or get her drunk to get laid. But, despite that, he loved her, or thought he did. Thinking about it now, the only thing that hurt was being rejected. Danny swallowed the lump in his throat. He teetered between anger and hurt when he thought of Kathryn. Actually, since they’d broken up, he hadn’t thought of her all that much until he saw a picture. Interesting.
Hearing a door slam, Danny swiveled in his chair and saw two women climb out of a car. A cute little short-haired girl was carrying a camera. The other one, damn, she was sexy as hell. Sweet little body, sandy-brown hair pulled up in a ponytail, and jeans that showed off her fine legs. She was wearing a bright red t-shirt and shit if she didn’t have perfect tits. His cock sputtered to life as he watched them walk up to his house. The gal with the camera started taking pictures while the little hottie stood by her, watching. And Danny watched her.
Short hair said something and sexy laughed. Fuck, talk about getting sucker punched. She had a perfect smile, luscious lips. Danny groaned as he reached down and rubbed his rapidly thickening cock a few times. “Easy, boy. We’re all alone now, no chick’s gonna want us. Settle down.”