by Ellis, Tim
Xena phoned the Duty Sergeant, and was glad to discover that it wasn’t Sergeant Jackson. She arranged for a team of six officers in an unmarked van to meet them in a lay-by on the main road.
Smith and Antrobus were in a squad car.
‘You two can go now, but thanks for your help. I’m afraid you’ll stick out like a sore thumb in a car with “police” written all over it. Also, those uniforms are a bit of a giveaway.’
As they were leaving Stick said, ‘We’re going to wait for the MAPs to turn up?’
‘Any better ideas?’
‘No, I think it’s a brilliant plan. What if they don’t turn up?’
‘Then, it’s going to be a long night, and I hope you’re not going to ask stupid questions the whole time.’
‘I’ll try not to.’
‘Excellent.’
***
‘Inspector Parish?’
‘Yes?’
The man offered his hand, and Parish shook it.
‘My name is Keith Hookey, I’m a police detective here in Richmond.’
‘Nice to meet you.’
‘Very good presentation, by the way. I hope the BAU get him.’
‘Thanks. I can’t imagine you want my autograph, so what’s on your mind?’
‘I attended a particularly gruesome murder at the Mountain Pass Hotel yesterday. The victim was a British male by the name of Harrison Lewis.’
‘England’s a big place,’ he said in an attempt at humour.
‘I’ve heard that. He’d been stabbed a number of times, and the hotel room was set on fire. So, you don’t know him?’
‘The name doesn’t ring any alarm bells.’
‘Well, he knew you.’
‘Oh?’
Detective Hookey took an envelope out of his inside pocket. ‘We found this in the room safe. It was the only thing that survived the fire.’ He passed the envelope to Parish. ‘We opened it, of course.’
Parish examined the white envelope. It had been opened using a letter opener. On the front, printed in blue ink, was: Detective Inspector Jed Parish – Epsilon 5.
Prising the envelope open, he found a piece of green card. He pulled the card out. It was a Left Luggage Ticket from Paddington Station, Number 223. The name of the depositor was Lewis. He looked down the list of items, and found a “One” against “Briefcase”. The cost was recorded as £10.00, and the date of deposit was 11th July 2002. A series of numbers had been written on the reverse of the card: 09 56 11 84.
‘I’m at a loss,’ he said to Hookey.
‘Well, you may as well keep it. It’s no good to us. When you get back to England, you can go and reclaim the briefcase I suppose. I expect it’ll all become clear at that time.’
Parish shrugged. ‘Maybe.’
‘What’s that “Epsilon 5”? You’re not a spy, are you?’
‘No, I’m not a spy. Just a simple detective like yourself. Epsilon 5 means as much to me as the ticket does.’
Hookey offered his hand again. ‘Good to meet you anyway, and I hope you find out what it’s all about.’
Parish shook the hand again. ‘So do I, and thanks for this.’ He waved the envelope, and then slipped it into his inside jacket pocket.
‘Who was that?’ Richards asked.
‘Where’ve you been?’
‘Collecting offers of marriage.’
‘And you didn’t even do the presentation.’
‘But thanks to you, they knew I was the brains behind it.’
‘The least I could do.’
‘So, who was that man?’
‘An admirer of my work.’
‘Unlikely. What did he give you?’
‘I don’t recall receiving anything from the man who came up to congratulate me on a scintillating presentation.’
‘I’ll find out.’
‘Keep your thieving hands out of my pockets.’
‘So, you put something in your pocket?’
‘Like your head, my pockets are empty.’
‘Are we going upstairs now?’
‘I suppose we should go and say hello to your mother.’
Richards checked her watch. ‘It’s only four-thirty. The shops will still be open, so she won’t be back yet.’
‘People sometimes walk away from the shops before they close, you know.’
‘Not my mum. She makes a point of being the last shopper standing.’
‘That’s crazy.’
Richards crossed her eyes. ‘You’re telling me.’
When they got up to the room – it was empty.
‘Seems you were right,’ he said, putting the kettle on and throwing his jacket on the bed.
‘Have you noticed that I’m always right?’
‘I haven’t noticed that, no.’
‘I don’t think you’re paying attention.’
‘I’ll make the coffee, shall I?’
‘Just water for me.’ She sat on the floor and took her notebook out of her bag. ‘What about tomorrow?’
‘We’ve got another day of lectures... that is, if Harry and his team will let us in. We, and when I say “we”, I of do course mean “you”, have probably become enemies of the state. We’ll have to go on the run, destroy all our technology, get new clothes, and dig the microchip out of our necks with a rusty screwdriver.’
‘You and mum suit each other. You’re both crazy. I meant about this message?’
‘Is the message addressed to you?’
‘I found it, so it probably is.’
‘It is not. We’ve passed it to Harry. If he chooses to do nothing with it, then that’s his prerogative.’
‘But... it could tell us the truth about Alicia Mae.
‘Or, it could not. It’s probably just a romantic rendezvous with a guy called Santa Claus.’
‘In March?’
‘That’s what it said. They probably do things differently in Lapland.’
‘I looked on the local map, Monroe Park is not far away.’
‘As far as we’re concerned, it may as well be in another state. We don’t want to get involved. For one, your mother will kill us. For two, it’s got nothing to do with us. We’ve solved the murder, now let’s leave well alone. For three, the lectures will be over, and we’ll have two days to enjoy ourselves. For four...’
‘Aren’t you just a teensy-weensy bit curious?’
‘Not in the slightest.’
‘Oh, I think you are. I think you’re as curious as I am.’
‘Nobody could be that curious.’
The door burst open. Angie pushed a bawling Jack inside.
‘You see to Jack,’ he said to Richards. ‘I’ll help with the shopping.’
Richards unbuckled Jack. The smell told its own story, and she took him into the bathroom.
‘Do you need any help, darling?’ he asked.
‘There’s a couple of things still left in the car,’ Angie said.
Gus grunted, weighed down with bags and boxes.
He caught the lift down to reception, and walked out to the car. He was surprised how two people, a baby, and a buggy had ever squeezed into the space remaining. The car was crammed to bursting with bags, boxes, and parcels. He grabbed as many as he could carry, and headed back to the room.
Gus passed him in reception.
‘We have nothing left in Richmond, your wife has it all.’
‘I’ll try and persuade her to give some back.’
It took him and Gus another two trips before they’d emptied the car.
‘We weren’t sent here to clear America’s national debt, you know.’
‘It’s only a few presents, and things. Stop going on.’
Opening the door Richards said, ‘I’m going to my room. I’ll see you both for dinner.’
‘Okay, love,’ Angie called after her.
As she slipped into the corridor Parish heard her say, ‘I have to find out what Epsilon 5 means.’
Chapter Twenty-Three
Saturday,
1st March
It wasn’t until one-thirty in the morning that a dark-coloured Transit van passed them, and turned off towards Berners Roding.
Xena nudged Stick. ‘Wake up. You should come with a health warning. I’ve never heard anybody snore like that. They could use the sound produced by your nose to drill tunnels through mountains. Maybe hire yourself out to the oil companies for North Sea exploration on the seabed. Or...’
‘I think I’ve got the message, Sarge. So, why am I awake?’
‘I thought you’d like to talk about the chronic state of the economy, and maybe come with the rest of us as we go and arrest some MAPs.’
‘They’re here?’
‘That’s a strong possibility, but we don’t want to rush in – only fools rush in. Let them get settled first. They’ve probably got their next paedophile in the back of their van, and we don’t want to interrupt them before he’s made a full confession, and suffered quite a bit, do we?’
‘You mean, we’re just going to sit here while they torture...’
‘Are there any Jaffa Cakes left?’
‘No.’
‘What about that all-day breakfast sandwich?’
‘There’s a bit left.’
‘Pass it over. I could eat a scabby donkey with fleas.’
When she’d polished off the rest of Stick’s sandwich, she picked up the radio. ‘You lot ready to go?’
‘About time.’
‘Now remember, I’d like them all alive, if you’d be so kind. I don’t mind some broken bones, and the paedophile – the one tied in the chair – can fall down and hit his head a lot while you’re transporting him up to the van, but no deaths. Are we clear?’
‘Clear.’
‘Okay, follow us to the church, then you handsome boys take the lead. The door to the cellar is at the far end. There’s no other exit, so they can’t run anywhere.’
Stick pulled out of the lay-by, drove up the lane, and parked on the road outside the church. The unmarked police van pulled up behind them. Four men leapt out of the back and two from the front, and then headed along the path like a squad of Orcs – shoulders hunched against the wind and rain, helmets with visors down, and chins tucked into the top of stab vests.
Xena was glad she was behind them.
They burst through the church door, pounded through the vestry, and crunched down the stairs.
They heard some shouting, thumps, and thuds, and then it went quiet.
‘Do you think it’s safe to go down now?’ Stick asked.
‘Back to your stupid questions? If I had x-ray eyes, I wouldn’t be standing here with you in the middle of the night, I can tell you.’
They went down the steps.
Four men were kneeling down facing the wall. Their hands had been handcuffed behind their backs. A fifth man – the paedophile – also had his hands handcuffed behind his back, but he was lying face down with a boot resting on the side of his head.
‘You four don’t look too much like “Mothers”,’ Xena said.
One of the four smiled. ‘It seemed like a good name.’
‘Now, you understand, don’t you, that if it was up to us, we’d let you entrepreneurs carry on with your valuable service to the community, but unfortunately it’s not up to us. I have no doubt, however, that you’ll receive sympathetic treatment from the justice system.’
‘They tried to kill me,’ the paedophile forced out.
Xena nodded, and one of the coppers gave him a well-aimed kick in the groin.
‘You, on the other hand, can expect to be treated rather more severely by all concerned. Okay men, let’s get them back to the station.’
‘Is that video camera still recording, Stick?’
Stick peered at it. ‘The light is flashing. I would say so.’
‘That’s all I need, a recording of my last will and testament. Wipe everything from when we came down those stairs.’
Stick laughed. ‘Yeah, that’d be fun.’
‘Fun for who?’
‘I don’t know.’
‘Then why did you say it? Would it be fun for you?’
‘No, that’s not what I said...’
‘I’m beginning to wonder if you know what you’re saying at all. Maybe you’re one of these people who opens his mouth, and rubbish comes out. Are you one of those people, Stick?’
‘It seems like it.’
‘Show me you’ve wiped my starring role.’
He showed her.
‘Good. You can take it into evidence now.’ She had a last look around the cellar. ‘Okay, let’s go back to the station and do the paperwork.’
‘You’ll be a DI on Monday.’
‘I’m beginning to think I’ll never be a DI. I don’t know if you’ve worked it out yet, but we haven’t got a Chief Constable anymore. There’s no one sitting in his executive leather chair to rubber stamp anybody’s promotion, least of all mine.’
***
Richards came into their room for breakfast – two pieces of brown seeded toast with a scraping of soya margarine, and a cup of weak milkless, sugarless, and tealess tea.
‘I don’t know how anybody can survive on what you eat and drink,’ he said, putting a fork piled high with egg, bacon, hash browns, and fried bread into his mouth. ‘A human being needs sustenance to make it through the dinosaur-infested jungle.’
‘Whereas you’re going to pop.’
‘Well, at least I’ll pop happy. Did you know that some people are anal-retentive, and some people are anal-expulsive.’
‘Do you have to talk about your anus while I’m eating?’
‘Nibbling. Eating is for grown-ups. Anally retentive people are very uptight. This is largely due to you clenching your anal sphincter. You need to loosen up, have a little fun, stop holding onto your...’
‘I’m still eating. I suppose you’re an anal-expulsive?’
‘No, not at all. I’m just a normal person who has an anally-retentive partner.’
‘Have you heard what he’s saying, mum?’
‘Don’t get me involved. I’m trying to work out how to get all this stuff back home.’
‘You know there are weight limits on planes, don’t you?’
‘It’ll be all right. You’ll just have to leave all your clothes here.’
‘I’m sorry?’
‘And probably Mary as well.’
‘Mum!’
‘And Jack seems to be growing out of the clothes he brought with him. I’ll leave them here for the poor people.’
‘Or, you could take...’
Richards nudged him.
‘What, dear?’
‘Nothing. I’m sure it’ll all work out one way or another.’
‘You know Monroe Park is just up the road, don’t you?’
‘How does that concern us?’
‘We could just be walking through the park at three o’clock today.’
‘And why would we do that?’
‘Exercise?’
‘You can’t leave it alone, can you? Harry has the message, he’ll do what needs to be done.’
‘No, they won’t do anything. We need to be there.’
He knew damn well he wouldn’t be able to talk her out of it. And if he ignored her, she’d simply go on her own. She was so wilful, but at least he knew what she was like. Some women were unpredictable, like an old World War II unexploded bomb – they could detonate at the slightest prod. Richards was straight as an arrow. He knew exactly what she was going to do, or not do. And in this case, she was not going to listen to a word he had to say, unless of course it was what she wanted to hear.
‘All right...’
She leaned over the table and hugged him. ‘I knew you’d see sense, sooner or later.’
‘You’re too soft with her, Jed,’ Angie said. ‘She can twist you round her little finger, and it’s not good for her.’
‘I am still here, you know,’ Richards said.
***
‘One down, one to
go,’ Stick said.
They were on their way to brief the Chief, who had come in especially on her Sunday morning off, and called them in. Xena was excited, but she didn’t know why. There was no way in hell she was going to get her promotion without a Chief Constable in situ.
After charging the MAPs and the paedophile, they’d spent three hours doing paperwork, but what stuck in Xena’s craw was the fact that the paedophile’s case would probably get dismissed. All the evidence against him had been extracted by torture. Even the DNA sample on Hayley Miles was probably inadmissible in a court of law. She should have waited that bit longer at the church.
‘You just like the sound of your own voice, don’t you?’
‘I was thinking of auditioning for Britain’s Got Talent.’
‘Doing what?’
‘Singing.’
Xena laughed for the first time in days. ‘I don’t know why I put up with you, numpty.’
She knocked on the Chief’s door.
‘I sing in the shower.’
‘Come.’
‘Okay to come in, Chief?’
‘By all means. Excellent work, you two. You obviously work well together.’
Stick grinned. ‘Thanks, Chief.’
Xena’s brow furrowed. ‘Anyway, we’d have probably caught them sooner, and I don’t wish to speak ill of the dead, but I have the feeling Miss Donnelly was doing her own thing when she should have been doing our thing.’
‘Possibly. A very sad affair, but here you are anyway. Tell me what’s happening with the Smith case. I saw his picture in the newspaper, and on the news...’
‘DC Gilbert and I discussed it. We knew we were getting close to wrapping up the MAPs case, so we thought we’d start up the Smith investigation again. Straight after we leave your office, we’re going to visit two women who think Smith is their husband.’
‘I see, and what about the woman you saw yesterday?’
‘We were filling in time, waiting for the MAPs’ case to break. It was a dead end, anyway.’
‘I hope you’re not looking for an excuse not to give DS Blake her promotion, Ma’am. You said if she solved the MAPs’ case by Monday...’
‘...I’d speak to the Chief Constable.’