Chapter 24
In my faithful, if somewhat battered red hatchback, I moved at a snail’s pace through the London traffic, the streets a festive cacophony of blaring horns, screeching tyres and distant sirens. For company, I’d switched on the radio and hummed along to the steady flow of carols and songs wafting through the speakers.
By the time I hit the motorway the snow that Bob had hinted at and I’d been all too eager to scoff at, began to fall across my windscreen. Big, firm flakes with a determination about them, obviously intent on hanging around for a little while at least.
“I’m dreaming of a white Christmas.” Bing crooned in the background and I sang along.
With the heater whacked on to full, I peered out in wonder from the warm safety of the car, thinking how magical it was to have snow at Christmas. I couldn’t remember the last time. Maybe as a child there’d once been a sprinkling covering the ground, but that could have just been a wishful memory. This was no sprinkling, though. This was the real McCoy.
The journey was one I was familiar with now and once I’d turned off the main roads and onto the country lanes that wound their way through the villages that led to Mettlesham, it felt as if I was on home territory. Today though, with at least an inch of thick snow carpeting the ground, progress was interminably slow. On at least a couple of hairy occasions the car skidded and swayed its way across the road, veering like a well-oiled drunk on his way home from the pub.
So it was a huge relief when Whitefriars finally came into view a couple of hours later. The sight of the rambling stone house nestled at the bottom of the lane made my heart soar. Seeing Rocco’s jeep in the drive was even more reassuring and set my heart buzzing with anticipation. As I gingerly made my way down the narrow lane, I rehearsed what I would tell him:
“Hello Rocco. It’s me, I’m back. Sorry for acting like a complete idiot. That job offer, the one I vehemently rejected less than twelve hours earlier, is it still open?” No that would never do, I thought, sighing. “Hello Rocco. There’s something I need to tell you. I’ve fallen hopelessly in love with you hence all the acting like a complete moron stuff.”
No, no, that would probably have him running a mile. Hopefully he’d be so pleased to see me he’d simply throw his arms around me, smother me in kisses and tell me not to worry, that all was forgiven.
I pulled the car into the driveway, parking it beside the jeep and turned off the ignition, my hands resting on the steering wheel for a drawn-out moment as I contemplated what was ahead. Drawing a deep breath, I opened the car door, my feet crunching into the unblemished snow, the cold immediately travelling up my legs. I traipsed around the car and eased the kitchen door open.
‘Hello!’ I called brightly, feeling a bit sick.
Any apprehension I was feeling was quickly dissipated by the inviting aroma emanating from the stove, enticing me indoors. One of the truly comforting things about Whitefriars was the wonderful smell of cooking and baking that seemed to be a constant feature, a medley of flavours drifting through the house. Today my twitching nose detected the scent of spices, vegetables and cloves bubbling from a large stock pan.
‘Beth!’ Sylvia, who had been standing at the sink, turned round to face me, placing her hands on her hips, her voice reproachful. ‘Don’t you ever go doing that again!’ She waved a wooden spoon at me before her face broke into the biggest smile as she hurried over, throwing her arms around me. She squeezed me so tight I could hear her heart beating against mine. Eventually, she pulled away, examining me at arm’s length. ‘And leaving me with a note like that, without even coming to say goodbye. I thought we were friends.’
I sighed, thinking how I’d let everyone down.
‘Oh, but we are, Sylvia. It was just . . .’ My shoulders slumped. ‘I’m so sorry.’ How could I explain and expect anyone to make sense of it. I didn’t understand it myself. ‘I got hold of the wrong end of the stick, that’s all. When I saw that newspaper, with the pictures of Pandora, well, I thought . . . ’
‘Yeesss?’ She pursed her lips together.
‘Well . . .’ If I said it quickly maybe it would be easier, ‘I thought Pandora and Rocco had got engaged,’ I blurted out, feeling suddenly foolish.
She took a step backwards, her face registering surprise.
‘But why on earth would you think that?’ Her brow furrowed. ‘When it’s been obvious to everyone around here that he fell madly in love with you almost as soon as he met you.’
I gasped, my fingers flying to my mouth. Could that really be true? I knew after our first meeting that I’d felt something powerful, something overwhelming, but I’d dismissed those feelings as the unrealistic yearnings of a girl newly dumped by her boyfriend. I mean, that whole love at first sight thing happened to other people, not to me.
‘But they were an item, weren’t they?’
‘Oh, only briefly,’ she said with a dismissive wave of her hand, ‘and that was long before you came on the scene. Rocco took Pandora under his wing when she arrived from Romania a few years ago. She worked in his restaurant as a waitress, that’s how they got to know each other. He got her going in the modelling world, introduced her to an agent and she was on her way.’
‘I never knew that.’
‘Oh yes. Rocco created the monster.’ Sylvia chuckled. ‘I don’t think she’s got any family; she grew up in an orphanage. So Rocco is her family really. He couldn’t get rid of her now if he wanted to.’
Like fitting the last piece into a challenging jigsaw puzzle, everything suddenly seemed to fall into place. Pandora was Rocco’s family too. Two of a kind.
Sylvia wiped her hands on a tea towel, lifted the lid off the pan, examined the contents and, satisfied that everything was doing as it should be, replaced it again.
‘Then when you came along it was clear to me he’d fallen in love. For the first time, I shouldn’t wonder.’
‘Really?’ I felt my heart galloping inside my chest.
‘Oh yes. He’s been a changed man since you’ve been on the scene. More relaxed, gentler, happier. You must have realised!’ I shook my head. Recently, I’d known diddly-squat about anything.
‘He’s in a foul mood today, though. I don’t know what you said to him, but I couldn’t get a word out of him. He stormed out in a right huff.’
‘Oh dear, Sylvia. I think I may have messed it all up. I don’t know if he’ll even speak to me now.’
‘Hey, come here.’ Sylvia wrapped her arms around me tightly. ‘Of course, he will. I don’t know what’s gone on between you, but I’m sure it’s something of nothing.’
‘Where’s he gone?’ I asked, with a sudden urgency. I had to speak to him, explain things. How could I have been so beastly to him?
‘He took Millie out. It was a while ago,’ she said, glancing at her watch. ‘I expect they’ll both be frozen through by now. I don’t suppose they’ll be long.’
‘I’ll go and find them.’ Kissing Sylvia on the cheek, I hastily pulled off my boots and exchanged them for a pair of wellies by the back door, putting one of Rocco’s big coats over my own. ‘Won’t be long!’ I waved to Sylvia.
‘For goodness sake, be careful out there,’ she warned, shaking her head.
I closed the door behind me, smiling to myself. Outside, with the cold branding my cheeks, my legs struggled through the deep soft snow, the effort of pulling my boots through it making the tops of my thighs ache. Determinedly, I thrust my gloveless hands into my pockets, my eyes scanning the horizon in search of Rocco and his dog.
I couldn’t see them, only the breathtaking view that engulfed me. I felt tiny standing alone among the sweeping white fields. The trees standing erect and still were cloaked in what looked like a sugar coated icing and the footprints following me soon vanished as the falling snow constantly smoothed out their trace.
By the time I reached the other side of the field I had to stop to catch my breath. I rested my forearms on the top of the frost encrusted fence, looking all arou
nd me, my entire body shivering with the cold, my fingers and toes stinging in harmony. Where were they? I thought impatiently, anxiously. Just then, as if in answer to my plea, I spotted a familiar brown bundle emerging from the woods. Millie, her nose to the floor, her tail bobbing happily, trotted along in the snow. Rocco was following behind, dressed from head to foot in dark clothing, his shoulders hunched, presenting a startling contrast to the white backdrop of the countryside. Like Millie, his gaze was fixed on the ground. The sight of the pair of them together made my heart soar.
I waved my arms, but Rocco was oblivious to my efforts. He seemed lost in thought as he trudged through the snow. Millie, though, sensed my movements, her ears pricking as she recognised me from a distance and if I hadn’t known better, I’d have been sure I spotted a smile appearing on her face.
‘Millie!’ I called, slapping my palms on the tops of my thighs.
I laughed as she came bounding over, her eyes bright, ears flapping and tail wagging gaily. By now Rocco had stopped in his tracks and was observing me, his hand to his forehead, as I bent down to make a fuss of Millie.
Moments later he was standing beside us, an expression of contempt upon his face.
‘You’re back, then?’ He muttered, curtly. I looked up and into his eyes. God, he looked awful. His skin was drawn, his eyes bloodshot and it was obvious his face hadn’t been intimate with a razor for a day or two.
‘Rocco.’ I stood up, meeting his gaze. ‘I’m so sorry.’ My hands reached out for his.
‘You’re freezing,’ he said, accusingly. He took my hands and rubbed some warmth into my frozen fingers, handing me his gloves. Unsmiling, he asked, ‘So why are you here? Did you forget some of your things?’
I shook my head. ‘I came back because . . . because I wanted to. To see you. To explain.’
‘You want your job back?’
‘Yes, but more than that I’d hoped we could talk. About us.’ I looked around, shivering, trying to find the right words. ‘I’m sorry, Rocco. I’ve messed everything up, haven’t I? Can we see if we can sort things out?’
His eyebrows disappeared high up into his forehead.
‘I don’t know. After everything you said?’
I flinched.
He drew a breath, but I noticed a subtle thawing in his eyes. ‘I need to think about it.’ He put a finger to his mouth. ‘Can I kiss you?’ he asked, raising an eyebrow, looking decidedly mischievous.
My face broke into the widest smile.
‘Oh yes, please,’ I said, squeezing his hands, as his warm lips settled on mine.
‘My God, woman!’ He pulled away quickly, running his hands up and down my arms. ‘You’re wet through. You’ll catch your death of cold. We don’t want a repeat of last time, do we?’
I giggled. ‘I suppose not. Whoa!’ I screeched, as without warning Rocco scooped me up in his arms and lifted me off the ground.
‘Come on,’ he said, striding off with purpose. ‘Let’s get you home.’
‘Really,’ I protested, kicking my legs half-heartedly, as Millie scampered excitedly at Rocco’s side, her doleful eyes looking up at me. ‘I can walk, you know. You’ll break your back carrying me.’
‘Nonsense,’ he said, as he strode on.
‘But . . . ’
‘Oh do be quiet.’ His lips touched the top of my head.
I rested my head on his chest. There was nothing else for me to do, but to lie back in Rocco’s arms, a contented smile upon my face, as he carried me home.
Chapter 25
Fifteen minutes later we were back at the house, its warmth assaulting us as soon as we stepped in the door.
‘So you found each other, then?’ If Sylvia was surprised to see me held aloft in Rocco’s arms, she didn’t show it. A smile rested on her lips as she dried some cutlery on a tea-cloth.
‘Are you going to put me down now?’ I asked, as I shrugged my shoulders at Sylvia.
‘No. You need to get out of those wet clothes. Could you fix us a couple of hot toddies please, Sylvia? We’ll have them up in the bedroom.’
She didn’t raise an eyebrow.
‘Yes, of course. You go up and I’ll bring them along in a jiffy.’
As Rocco manoeuvred me through the kitchen, I caught Sylvia’s eye and she flashed me a wide smile and winked. Upstairs, Rocco set me down gently on his huge double bed. In my absence, I’d obviously been upgraded from guest to master bedroom.
I’d dreamt of this moment, of being alone with him in his bedroom, and here I was, cold and soggy. Hardly the circumstances I’d imagined, but it didn’t matter.
‘Get out of those clothes and put this on,’ he said, matter-of-factly, throwing me a big, fluffy towelling robe. ‘I’ll be back in a moment.’
Quickly, I peeled off my jacket, jumper and jeans, letting them fall to the floor and pulled Rocco’s dressing gown around me, pleased to be rid of the sodden clothes. I snuggled into its softness, feeling suddenly weary. I mooched around the bedroom yawning, eager for Rocco to return before parking my backside on the edge of the queen sized bed.
‘Right.’ He reappeared in the doorway bearing a steaming tankard and a plate of crumpets. ‘You feeling a bit more comfortable now?’
‘Yes, thanks.’
‘Cider with cinnamon and cloves. Try it.’ He handed me the warm glass. I looked doubtful. ‘Trust me, it has great medicinal value. And I thought you might fancy something to eat too.’
‘Mmm, lovely,’ I said, realising I was famished. Not only had I missed breakfast, but last night’s dinner too. Food had seemed an irrelevance then, but now my mouth was watering at the comforting, toasted smells. I bit into an oozing crumpet, unfazed by the butter that streamed down my chin.
Rocco looked across at me and smiled indulgently. I wiped my chin with the base of my hand and took a sip of the mulled cider, feeling the heat travel down to my tummy.
‘Now let’s get this straight.’ Rocco sat down in the chair at the end of the bed, one leg splayed over the other, his crotch disconcertingly displayed. I averted my gaze, trying instead to concentrate on his eyes.
‘You really thought Pandora and I had got engaged?’ His eyebrows disappeared high up into his forehead and he attempted to hide a snigger. This was obviously a major cause of amusement to everyone. First Lexi, then Sylvia and now Rocco.
‘Well, what did you expect me to think?’ I pleaded. ‘I saw photos in the paper of you together . . .’
‘Yes, we were discussing the wedding. That would be Pandora and Zak’s wedding. She wanted to know if they could have the wedding at Whitefriars and if I’d do the food. You know Pandora; she can be very persuasive when she wants to be.’
I felt so stupid.
‘Yes,’ I stuttered, trying to build my case. ‘But when I saw the photo of Pandora showing off that whopper of an engagement ring, I couldn’t really come to any other conclusion.’
Rocco sighed exaggeratedly. ‘Well, you could have done if you’d stopped to think about it. What upsets me most about all this is that I told you that night at the hotel that there was nothing going on between Pandora and me.’ He shook his head, reprimanding me gently. ‘You really think I would lie to you like that?’
I had. I’d thought all those things of him and worse.
If you and I are going to have any kind of future together,’ he continued, ‘you need to learn to trust me.’
A future. The words on Rocco’s lips sounded delightful. But I needed to know what sort of a future he had in mind. A short-term, heady and intense kind of thing or a long-term, lifetime kind of thing?
‘Oh, I will trust you, I mean I do trust you, it’s just that everything’s been up in the air these last few weeks and I just didn’t know what to think.’
He looked at me sceptically. ‘Pandora— she knew. She said that the first time she saw us together she knew I’d fallen in love with you.’
‘Really?’ I gasped, pushing the duvet down. It was getting very hot under there, my cheeks
, ears and limbs burning from the intensity of the conversation. I didn’t really have Pandora down as the intuitive sort. ‘And she didn’t mind?’
‘No.’ He laughed. ‘Pandora and I were only ever mates. Admittedly she liked the idea of being part of a celebrity couple, and that’s why we ended up going to those kinds of dos together, but only when I had to. I wasn’t into that whole party scene. Besides, Pandora’s been nursing a very heavy crush on Zak for some time now, and being here with me gave her the perfect excuse to spend time with him.’
I thought back to that night on the boat. I’d thought Pandora’s loved-up state was due to Rocco, but I could see now it was very firmly intended for Zak.
‘They make a great couple, don’t you think?’ Rocco asked. ‘I’m really pleased for them. They are actually very well-suited.’
‘Yes, I suppose they are.’ My gaze flickered between Rocco and the cast-iron fireplace in the corner of the room, a pretty pink Christmas cactus sitting on the mantelpiece, ‘but it seems to have happened so quickly,’ I said, unable to keep my feelings of doubt out of my words, ‘them falling in love.’
Rocco came across to the bed, lifted up my hand and gazed deeply into my eyes.
‘It can, you know. You’re a cynic, that’s your trouble. I’ll tell you something. I fell in love with you that first time I met you. Do you know that?’
I shook my head, too dumbstruck to say anything.
‘When I saw you sitting on the sofa at the restaurant. In fact, I kept putting off coming over to see you in case the reality didn’t match the image I had in my mind. You flashing your knickers and cleavage at me; it was a moment to remember. I was hooked from the start.’
‘I never did!’ I spluttered indignantly.
‘You did too, and I can’t tell you how endearing it was. I couldn’t take my eyes off you.’
I cringed inwardly, thinking how mixed up I’d felt that day — all the tears I’d shed that morning. The rocket surge of emotion I’d felt towards Rocco I’d put down to having just been unceremoniously dumped, and the instant and overpowering attraction I felt for him just the pathetic longings of a vulnerable girl. Could that strangely warming feeling that made me tingle inside all the way down to my toes have been the elusive state of love? Even then?
WARM WINTER KISSES a feel good Christmas romance novel Page 17