by Harley Wylde
He winked at me. “Sorry, babe. Don’t own pajamas.”
Outlaw turned off the lights and got into bed, immediately reaching for me. I went willingly enough, curling against him. The fact his cock was starting to get hard and push against me was more than a bit distracting, but if he could ignore it, then I could certainly try to do the same. I’d never shared a bed with someone before and I felt a little awkward. I placed my hand on his side as I cuddled closer, my head tucked under his chin. It was rather nice, and I felt my body start to relax.
The strength of him surrounding me, his scent teasing my nose, the warmth of his body pressed against mine… I’d never felt so wanted in my entire life. So… protected. No one had ever been that affectionate with me, not that I remembered. My memories of my parents had faded over the years. I remembered my mother giving me hugs, but I didn’t remember how it had felt, or how she smelled. Sometimes her face was even a little hazy in my mind.
My foster parents had only shown affection when people were looking, and even then they were on the reserved side. It was strange that some man I’d never met before, one who admitted to not walking on the right side of the law -- as if his name weren’t enough of a clue -- could make me feel cherished when those in my life who were supposed to take care of me didn’t have that same effect.
“You’re thinking too hard,” he murmured. “Sleep, Elena. You’ll need it.”
He pressed his cock against me and I got the message loud and clear. I needed sleep because he wanted to keep awake doing other things. My cheeks warmed as I thought about him taking my V-card. Then I remembered what he’d said earlier. Was he even going to give me a choice? For that matter, did I want him to? I’d never felt so confused, and yet certain, at the same time. He left me reeling, but I knew that I wanted what he was offering.
“You said you weren’t going to have sex with me because then you’d keep me.”
He chuckled, but it was a harsh sound. “That’s because I am keeping you. You’re right where you’re supposed to be.”
No asking. Just telling. I should have been angry. Yelled, screamed, told him that he had no say over what I did. I was a grown-ass woman in charge of my own life. And yet… all I felt was this warmth, like I’d finally found the place where I belonged. I’d read countless romance novels, and I’d always sighed when the heroine found her prince. Outlaw was far from Prince Charming, but maybe he was just what I needed. I had to wonder if he was the piece that had been missing from my life. I’d always thought it was loving parents, but now I wasn’t so sure.
“Not going to argue?” he asked.
“Am I supposed to?”
He kissed the top of my head. “No, but I expected at least a little bit of a fight. Wouldn’t have changed the outcome. If you’d have tried to leave, I’d have just gone after you.”
I tried to still my mind, to blank everything and just sleep, but I couldn’t. As much as everything he said was turning me on, I had to wonder if he’d said those same words to another woman some other time. I wasn’t stupid. He wasn’t a virgin like me. The women I’d seen at the clubhouse had probably volunteered to keep his bed warm on many occasions. It was a disturbing thought. I didn’t have any idea if the men I’d seen last night were with someone or single. If they did have a woman at home, did she know they were with other women? Would I be expected to just look the other way?
Outlaw sighed. “Baby girl, what’s going through your mind?”
“If you claim me, what does that mean? I know you wouldn’t let me leave, but what exactly would I be to you?”
He rolled to his back and pulled me tight against his side. I felt his fingers tugging on my hair as he played with the strands. For the longest time, he didn’t say a word, and I worried he wouldn’t answer my question. Then he finally spoke.
“This club, they’re my family. I consider the men here my brothers. Right now, only two of them have women in their lives they’ve claimed. Badger has Adalia as his ol’ lady, and Dingo claimed Meiling. When someone like me claims you, it’s forever, Elena. I won’t let you go. Ever. Once you’re mine, that’s it. Anyone else touches you, I’ll hand their ass to them. They fuck you, I’ll kill them.”
My breath hitched and my eyes went wide. He’d just admitted that he would murder someone. The first frisson of fear settled in me. I really didn’t know anything about this man. What if I made him so angry he decided to kill me? Suddenly, all the warm fuzzies were fleeing. My heart slammed against my ribs and I tensed a little. I tried not to, but I couldn’t help it.
He stroked his fingers down my arm. “Calm down, angel. I’d never do anything to hurt you.”
“Just other people?”
“There’s something you need to understand. I think you’ve lived your life with blinders on, and it’s part of what I like about you. The sweetness and innocence. You don’t find that around here. A few years ago a friend of mine was dragged from her home. Those men took me too, thinking I was her husband. I let them beat the shit out of me to keep them distracted. If I hadn’t, they’d have raped and tortured her. It cost me, a lot, but I’d do it again in a second. Those men were dealt with.”
I tried to digest what he was saying, but it was hard. It was one thing to read about stuff like that in paper or see it in a movie. I’d never actually known anyone who faced that kind of thing. He was right. I had been living life with blinders on. Not once had it ever occurred to me that the ugliness in the world could ever touch me. It was naïve, and I realized that now, but that didn’t make murder right. Did it?
“I will protect you with my last breath, Elena. If that means I kill someone to do it, then so be it. There are monsters in the world who deserve to die. If they don’t, then countless others will be hurt or worse. If I can stop just one of those men from taking a life or ruining an innocent, then I’ll do it.” He took a deep breath and let it out. “The room I came from earlier, it’s where I keep my computers and other tech. I used to be a hacker. A damn good one.”
“Used to be?” I asked.
He held up a hand and flexed his fingers. “The beating I took resulted in most of the bones in my hands being broken or crushed. They don’t function the way they used to. Some of it is nerve damage, some of it just the bones not healing quite right. I’m not quick enough on a keyboard anymore to be of much use. I can dig a little, but I can’t risk going too deep and getting caught because of my fucked-up hands.”
I didn’t know anything about hackers, or computers for that matter.
“I’m not a good guy, Elena. Not like other men you’ve met. And I’m not counting Garrison West in that scenario, or even your foster father. I think they’re neck deep in some shady shit. The point is that yes, I will kill to protect my family, to protect you, and I’ll do whatever else is necessary to keep you safe and give you all the things you want or need.”
I traced the tattoo over his ribs with my finger while I thought about everything he’d said. He’d been honest even though he didn’t have to be. At least, I assumed he was being honest. I couldn’t think of a single person who would admit to being capable of killing someone unless they would actually do it. This wasn’t the type of conversation where such a thing could be a boast. If he’d said as much to another man, then maybe I could have passed it off as bragging or trying to seem tougher than he was, but I knew that wasn’t the case. He truly meant that he’d hurt someone to keep me safe, even kill them.
“I should let you go. I know it’s wrong to keep you, lock you up here at the compound, and keep you with me. It’s selfish. Probably the most selfish thing I’ve ever done, but I can’t let you go, angel. I’ve never met anyone like you before, and I somehow doubt there’s another like you out there.”
“Do I have to share you with those other women?” I asked.
I saw his faint smile in the dim light that was starting to stream through the windows. His gaze locked with mine, and the humor I saw there made me wonder what he found so funny.
“Angel, none of those women can hold a candle to you. I don’t want them. Only you.” He grabbed a fistful of my hair and tugged lightly. “You’re it for me, baby girl. So no, you don’t have to share me. Any of those bitches puts her hands on me, you have my permission to put her on her ass.”
I wasn’t the violent type. I’d never so much as yelled at someone before, much less gotten physical. Did he want me to do that? To shove someone, or get into a fight over him? Just what sort of rabbit hole had I fallen down? Then again, if this was Wonderland, it was a really fucked-up version.
“So we’d be exclusive,” I said, hoping he wasn’t going to disagree. “A couple?”
“More like you’d be my wife, except not necessarily with all the paperwork involved. But if you want a wedding, I’m happy to marry you. You being my ol’ lady, wearing a cut that says you’re my property, that holds far more weight around here than a marriage ceremony.”
Married. He wanted to marry me. My head was starting to hurt, and I didn’t think it was from a lack of sleep. It was all too much to take in at one time. We hadn’t even known each other for a full day.
“Sleep. I’ll answer any other questions you have when the time is right.” He stroked my arm again, the movement slow and gentle. It was hard to imagine the tough guy having such a soft side.
“Outlaw,” I said, my voice heavy with sleep as my eyes started to close.
“Call me Noah,” he said. “But only when we’re alone like this.”
“Noah.” I smiled. The name didn’t seem hardcore enough for a biker, but I liked it. “Don’t let me sleep too long.”
“You’ve had one hell of a day, angel. You sleep until your body says it’s time to get up. There’s nothing going on that can’t wait a little while.” He ran his fingers through my hair. “We can talk about whatever you want later.”
“Thank you,” I murmured.
He hugged me tighter. “For what?”
“Taking care of me.”
Sleep pulled me under. My dreams were full of monsters, dragons, and knights in shining armor on motorcycles. When I woke, the bed was empty and the sun was shining brightly. I didn’t know how much time had passed, or where Outlaw had gone. But I did know one thing… my subconscious had tried to tell me that Outlaw was my hero, and I thought perhaps it would be a good idea to listen to that little voice.
It had made me run when Garrison West was pushing to marry me, and from what Outlaw had said, it was a good thing I’d left. If an upstanding member of the community, someone who was a church deacon, wasn’t who he seemed to be, then maybe a biker really was the good guy in this scenario. One thing was for certain. I had to trust someone, and my gut was telling me to trust Outlaw.
I got out of bed and went to find him. Seeing another woman in his arms made my stomach drop. The way she clung to him, the look on her face… My throat tightened and I took a step back, but movement caught my attention on the other side of the room. An imposing man with red hair and a beard stood watching me, a boy who looked to be about three or four clutched in his arms. The man’s gaze pinned me to the spot, then a slight smile curled his lips.
“No worries, little one. That’s my wife. She’s not going to take him from you,” the man said.
I jerked my gaze back over to the couple, to find Outlaw staring at me. He pulled away from the woman and held his hand out to me. Against my better judgment, I went to him, letting him pull me against his side. My brain felt scrambled and I wasn’t sure which way was up.
“Elena, I’d like you to meet Lavender and Wire. They came to help.”
Tears misted the woman’s eyes. “I’m so glad he found you. I’ve been so worried. I thought I’d ruined his life.”
Ruined his life? How would she… and then it all became clear. This was the woman he’d protected. It wasn’t until that moment I noticed the small swell of her stomach. He hadn’t only saved her, but he’d given their child a shot at living. If she’d died, that baby would have never existed. I didn’t know how long ago he’d helped her, but it was possible the little boy wouldn’t have existed either.
I’d never felt prouder of someone than I did in that moment with Outlaw. Because of him, three lives had been saved. That was also the moment I realized all those scars, or at least a lot of them, had come from the beating he’d taken to keep Lavender safe.
I felt like such a bitch for thinking the worst when I’d walked in.
“It’s nice to meet you,” I said.
Outlaw gave a soft growl. “Angel, what the fuck are you wearing?”
I glanced down. “The same shirt you gave me last night. It wasn’t like I knew you had company.”
“Go change. Now.” He gave me a nudge toward the door, and I saw Lavender roll her eyes. It seemed like she was used to the caveman behavior and I figured her husband must be the same way.
I gave her a little wave and scurried off. I hoped he didn’t plan on me returning right away because I seriously needed a shower, and I wasn’t going back out there until I’d had one.
Chapter Six
Outlaw
“Stop looking at me like that,” I told Lavender. She was giving me puppy eyes and it was annoying the fuck out of me. “I told you I was fine. I repeatedly have told you that none of it was your fault.”
“Good luck,” Wire muttered. “Been telling her that for four damn years.”
She reached out like she was going to touch me, then thought better of it. Probably a good idea considering how well Elena had handled seeing me with another woman. If she’d have fucked things up, I’d have been pissed. Thankfully, Wire noticed Elena before I had and said something before she could disappear.
“You grew your beard back,” she said.
“Yeah. Took a while for some of the scars to heal, and even now there are spots that don’t grow hair very well. It’s long enough you can’t tell.” I ran my hand over it. “Figured the scars would scare any kids I ran across when I’m in town. They tend to shy away from most of us already. Don’t need to give them nightmares.”
Wire sat, settling his son in his lap, and Lavender took the chair next to him. I leaned against the counter, waiting on Elena to come back. She’d been gone at least twenty minutes and I was starting to think she wasn’t coming back. Atlas banged his hands on the kitchen table and I smiled. The kid was cute, and if he was anything like his parents, he was fucking smart as hell too. I wondered how long before they had him at a computer, or did they already? I really should have kept in touch better, but Lavender’s guilt had weighed on me.
“Is this one a girl or a boy?” I asked, pointing to Lavender’s belly.
“We don’t know yet,” she said. “I’m kind of hoping for a girl, but we have another two months before we find out.”
She looked around the room and I wondered if she was nervous about being here. I’d been surprised as hell when they’d shown up. Should have known that Wizard would run his damn mouth about the shit going on with Elena. Something told me Wire knew more than I did at this point.
“Where are y’all staying?” I asked. “Because I don’t have a guest room set up.”
“Grizzly wasn’t around when we got here, but Slash said he had a room we could use. What’s up with the Pres?” Wire asked.
Shit. I’d forgotten all about that clusterfuck yesterday. I hadn’t gotten so much as a text from Grizzly, or anyone else, about the situation with Lilian and Dragon. If we were down a brother, I’d have surely heard about it, which meant Dragon was still breathing. For now.
“He tore out of here last night saying Dragon knocked up Lilian. That was the last I heard from him.”
Wire whistled. “Damn. I hope that boy can run fast.”
“Boy?” I asked. “You’re in your forties, not pushing sixty. Dragon is maybe a decade younger than you.”
“Yeah, well, I wasn’t dumb enough to knock up the Pres’s daughter,” Wire said.
“And that would be a good thing,” sa
id Lavender, “since Torch’s oldest daughter is thirteen. The club wouldn’t even bother hiding the body because there wouldn’t be enough of you left to bury.”
Wire made a face. “It was hard enough for me to handle our age difference. That’s just sick.”
I couldn’t help but laugh. “Hey, man, you brought it up.”
Lavender looked around again. She seemed almost jittery, and I couldn’t figure out why. I was about to ask if she had ants in her pants when Elena came back in, dressed in jeans and a modest teal shirt. Her hair was still wet, but she’d braided it. Before I could say anything, Lavender leaned closer to Elena and whispered something. My woman smiled and nodded for Lavender to follow her.
“What the fuck was that about?” I asked.
“She probably has to pee. Again,” Wire said. “I swear when she’s pregnant she goes about every half hour. And when she’s closer to her delivery date, it will seem like she goes closer to every ten minutes.”
“I didn’t need to know that.”
He shrugged a shoulder, then smirked. “You brought it up.”
Fucker. I flipped him off and he only laughed. I’d have worried about corrupting Atlas, but if that kid hung around the Reapers, he’d likely heard and seen far worse.
“Do you want to talk about your situation with or without Elena present?” Wire asked.
“Probably better if I hear it first and then figure out how to break it down for her. She’s led a very sheltered life.”
He nodded. “All right. Anyone else need to know about this?”
I sighed and rubbed the back of my neck. I hadn’t told anyone what was going on, and I knew Griz would be fucking pissed at me. Or rather, he would be if he weren’t worried about his daughter. If there was ever a time to fuck up, this was it. At least the fallout would be minimal. “We’d better tell everyone. They don’t know shit about this yet.”
“When the girls get back in here, I’ll leave Atlas with Lavender and we can head over to the clubhouse. Better text your crew and let them know to get their asses to Church. It would be nice if just once we could find a woman who didn’t have hell riding on her heels. But then, I guess our lives would be too fucking dull,” Wire said.