His features relaxed and he asked, “How are you feeling?”
“Better I think. What time is it?” I asked as I pushed myself up to a sitting position.
“Around 2pm. You hungry?”
“I could eat.”
“Be right back,” he winked and walked out the door.
He returned with a plate full a food and a huge container of water. He put everything down and turned to face me, “We need to talk.”
I threw my hands in the air. “Why does every conversation I have lately start with a variation of that statement?”
“A lot going on, baby. We’re trying to get shit sorted as best we can.”
I slumped back into the pillow. “I know, and I appreciate everything everyone is doing. I’m just frustrated and I feel like I’m missing a big piece of a messed up puzzle.”
“You’re not alone in that. And you’re right. You are missing a big piece. We all are. Unfortunately, there are only a few key people who can fill in the gaps and we can’t ask any of them right now.”
“Why not?” I asked.
“Well, Duke isn’t awake yet, no one knows where your mother is or what happened to her, and it ain’t like we can go knock on Octavius’s door. Even if we could get our hands on him, it’s not like he would tell us anything,” he explained.
“Did Byte find anything with those names we gave you?”
“You know I can’t tell you that.”
“Ugh! It might be club business, but it is also my business!” I shouted, though he didn’t seem fazed by it.
“Sorry, darlin’. You’ll have to take that up with your father.”
“Whatever. What did you need to talk to me about?”
He sat down beside me on the bed and I braced myself for whatever he was about to say.
“Phoenix thinks we need to move you to a safer location.” I opened my mouth to protest, but he held his hands up and continued, “Hear me out. They know where you are and they obviously either want you back or want you dead. Since we found the tracker in your neck and removed it, we can move you to a new location without them knowing.”
“They’ll think I’m still at the clubhouse?”
“Exactly. Byte attached it to a battery pack or something to keep it running outside of a body and hooked it onto Chop’s collar.”
I gasped in horror, “No! You can’t let them shoot the dog!”
“Calm down, darlin’. They’re not going to shoot the dog. They’re looking for you, not Chop. We only did that so it would still look like you were moving around the compound. If your little blinking dot sat still in one place all of a sudden, that would tip them off that we found it.”
I still wasn’t completely sold on the new plan. “If they think I’m still here, everyone that really is here will be in danger. I can’t be the cause of someone here getting hurt.”
He chuckled, “You don’t get a say in that anymore, darlin’. This is how club life works. We’re a brotherhood, a family. When those test results proved you were Phoenix’s daughter, you were automatically under the protection of Blackwings, whether or not you wanted it or needed it. We protect what’s ours.”
“I’m not yours,” I stated matter-of-factly.
He smirked. “I’ll let you have that for right now, but you are Phoenix’s. You only have to belong to one of us for it to matter.”
“I’m not Phoenix’s. I’m not yours. I’m not anybody’s. I’m a freaking person!” I was on my feet, fists clenched, face red, and now my side was throbbing.
He grinned. The man had the gall to grin at me. “Calm down. You’re getting hung up on the words and not the meaning. I’m not saying you’re a piece of property to be owned. By saying you’re somebody’s, it means you’re important to that person, that they care about you; therefore, the club cares about you. Now,” his grin widened, “did you just almost curse?”
Did I miss something? “Huh?”
He teasingly pointed a finger at me. “You said freaking. Correction, you yelled freaking. I’m quite proud of you.”
Was he serious? “Are you kidding me? You’re in here telling me I am in more danger than we thought and now I have to be moved somewhere else and you’re focused on the fact that I said freaking. Freaking. Freaking. Freaking. There. Now tell me where I’m going.”
He mumbled something that I didn’t catch. “What was that?”
He cleared his throat and met my eyes. “I said, ‘You’ll be going over my knee if you don’t watch that smart mouth.’”
I rolled my eyes. “We’ve already had this discussion once. Could we please get back to the main topic of conversation and before you say anything irreverent, I’m referring to my future location.”
He sighed and ran his hands through his dark hair. “Right. Phoenix wants to move you out of the clubhouse to a remote location until he can get the situation with Octavius and the farm sorted. Badger mentioned that he has a cabin up in the mountains that would be safe for you. It’s not far from Devil Springs and only a couple of hours at most from here.”
I swallowed hard. “I’m going by myself?”
He looked at me incredulously. “Have you learned nothing while you’ve been here? Of course you’re not going by yourself. I’m going with you, as well as two prospects.”
“What about Reese?”
“For now, it’s best if she stays here. We’re not sure if they have put together the connection between you two, but she has been around the clubhouse since they have been watching, so we need her to still be seen around here. We have to keep things looking as close to normal as possible.”
“Won’t they notice that you and two prospects are missing?”
“Nope. It will just look like me and the newbies have gone on a run.”
“How am I going to get to this cabin? If they’re watching, won’t they see me leave?”
He stood. “All you need to worry about right now is getting yourself packed up. Let me know if you need help and I’ll send a prospect in. We’re leaving tonight, just after it gets dark.”
“Fine. Can you find Reese for me? I have barely seen her since Duke was hurt and I want to talk to her before we leave for the cabin.”
“You haven’t seen her because she has either been at the hospital with Harper or holed up in Carbon’s room.”
That seemed odd. Were Reese and Duke close? I thought she said her brother wouldn’t let her hang around the clubhouse. “Were Duke and Reese close?”
He shrugged, “Don’t think so. Never saw her around here before you showed up.”
“Okay. Well, could you check Carbon’s room and see if she’s there? I want to see her before we go. I’m a little worried about her.”
“Why?”
“I don’t know. Just a feeling. She seems a little more distant than usual I guess.” That wasn’t a complete lie. She was more distant, but it was more than a feeling. I knew something was wrong with her, I just didn’t know what.
He nodded. “I’ll see if I can find her. Get started packing up. We’re leaving even if you aren’t ready to go and we’re not coming back if you forgot something.”
“Got it.” With that, he left me to my packing.
CHAPTER 18
Ember
“Are you sure this is safe?” I was sitting in an enclosed trailer with three motorcycles and Dash. The two prospects, Jamie and Pete, were pulling us using Badger’s old Blazer.
“It’s as safe as it can be. It’s not like you are going to fall out or anything.”
“I know that, but what if we have a wreck or they go off the side of the mountain. We don’t even have seat belts!”
“Darlin’, if they drive off the side of the mountain, a seat belt ain’t going to save you. Just try and relax. We’ll be there soon.”
I turned my head away from him. It’s not like he could see me anyway, but still, I wanted that extra bit of distance. I was feeling far too many emotions at one time and I wasn’t sure how to handle them all. I was worried about
Phoenix and the men back at the clubhouse. I was upset that I didn’t get to see Reese or even talk to her before we left. Did she even know I had been shot? I was angry for being put in this messed up situation, but I didn’t know where to direct that anger, so I couldn’t process it very well. I was nervous about being alone with Dash and two prospects I barely knew in a secluded cabin on top of a mountain. If something happened, I could potentially be stuck up there by myself, or with two young men I didn’t really know.
I was also scared. Really scared. What if Phoenix and the club didn’t come out on top? What if Octavius found me again? Would he kill me or take me with him? Would he kill Dash and the prospects? This whole situation had the potential for me to lose everyone I’d come to care about recently. I wouldn’t survive it if I lost everyone. I wouldn’t want to.
I felt a warm hand on my shoulder and then I was being pulled into a solid chest. His other hand went to my face and his thumb slid fluidly across my cheek. I hadn’t realized I was crying, but there I was, tears steadily running down my face. “Shhh, it’s going to be okay, baby.” He gently rocked me back and forth while soothingly rubbing my back.
I hiccupped, “You don’t know that. What if everyone dies? He could kill Phoenix and everyone at the club and then he could come to the cabin, kill you guys, and take me away.” I wailed and buried my face in his neck.
He smoothed his hand over my hair. “This all you been thinking about?”
I nodded and sniffed. I hoped I wasn’t getting snot all over his neck. How gross would that be?
“I’m going to tell you this one time, so listen and listen good. Phoenix is the president for a reason. This ain’t his first rodeo. On top of that, he has years of military experience. He was highly decorated and highly ranked before he returned home. Badger is the VP because he is a close second to Phoenix. They can handle this. As for the four of us, we have a plan and a backup plan that we will go over when we get there. If anything goes wrong, we’ll all know what to do. I’m not going to promise that something won’t happen to me, but I will promise that Octavius will not get you.”
“Dash, don’t say that,” I pleaded.
“Do you know why Phoenix sent me up here with you?” I shook my head, I really had no idea why, but I was very happy that it was Dash he sent. “Because your father knows that I would lay down my life for you just as fast as he would. When there is a cause close to the heart, people fight a lot harder for it.”
I pushed back from him just a little so I could look at his face. It was hard to see him, but the tiny touch light on the other side of the trailer allowed me to see the shimmer of his eyes. “Why would you do that?”
“Because I care about you, Ember. A lot. I know you just came from a shit situation and this is a whole new world for you, so I’ve been trying to give you time to get adjusted and settled, but know this, you are mine.”
This time, it didn’t make me angry when he said I belonged to someone, to him. Not at all. I couldn’t help the smile that slowly spread across my face. My voice came out raspier than I intended when I asked, “What exactly does that mean?”
He leaned closer, so his lips were right against the shell of my ear. For a few moments all I felt was his warm breath and then he spoke, “It means you are mine. In every way. Body, heart, and soul.”
“And you will be?”
“Silly girl. I’m already yours.” He nipped at my earlobe and then pressed a warm kiss on my neck, which made me shiver. He carefully pulled me to him and arranged me so that I was straddling him.
My arms went around his neck and I slid my fingers into his thick hair. I felt really awkward, but I had to know, “So, you’re like my boyfriend?”
He scoffed. “Do I look like a fucking boy to you? And I damn sure don’t want to be your friend. I’m your man, darlin’. You good with that?”
“Yeah, I think I’m good with that.” I tried to hide it, but I knew he heard the tremble in my voice. I wanted to be with him. I enjoyed his company, I felt safe with him, and I really liked the things he had done to my body. Still, I was nervous. I’m sure he had plenty of experience with dating and sex, while I had none other than what I had done with him. How could he even want to be with someone like me? I wouldn’t even know how to make him feel the way he made me feel the other night. I mean, the romance novels Reese had me reading explained a lot of stuff I had never even heard of, but reading about it and doing it were two very different things.
“Hey, what’s going on in that head of yours?”
“Nothing,” I answered quickly, too quickly.
He gave my hips a gentle, but firm squeeze. “Don’t lie to me. If this is going to work between us, we have to be honest with each other. No matter what. You can talk to me about anything.”
My mouth suddenly felt dry. I decided I would say it fast and get it over with. “I-don’t-know-how-to-please-you-because-I-don’t-have-any-experience-and-I’m-afraid-that-will-make-you-not-want-me.” It all came out like one really long word. I sucked in a huge breath and waited to see how he would respond.
His voice was soft when he spoke and I could hear his smile, “Baby, I know you don’t have a lot of experience. I prefer it that way.”
“Y-you do?”
“Yeah, I do. I get to be the one who helps you figure out what you like and don’t like. I’ll show you what I like and what I don’t. I never expected you to just know those things.”
I sighed in relief and laid my head against his chest. At least one of my current problems had been solved.
“We need to stop talking about this. It’s making me hard and I’m not touching you like that while you’re hurt.”
I smiled against his chest, “Okay, Dash.”
He lightly slapped my butt. “Get some rest. We’ll be there before you know it.”
***
I couldn’t fall asleep. I had too many thoughts flooding my mind and too many emotions flooding my heart. Even with all of my inner turmoil, I felt safe in Dash’s arms. Because of that, I didn’t make a move to get up when I felt the Blazer come to a stop, followed by the engine shutting off.
“Come on, beautiful. We’re here,” Dash murmured against my ear.
I gingerly got to my feet. My body was sore from straddling Dash for hours and my wounds were starting to ache again.
“I’ll get you something to eat and some pain medicine once we get everything inside.”
“Thank you. What can I help with?”
“Not a damn thing. Stitches, remember? Go inside and pick out a bedroom. Then plant your ass there until I come bearing food,” he said, jovially.
So, that’s what I did. The cabin was the definition of remote, but it was a lot bigger and nicer than I expected. I assumed we would be staying in something equivalent to a hunting shack, but that was not the case. This place was two stories with four bedrooms and four bathrooms. In addition to the living room, kitchen, and dining room, it had a large game room, an attached two car garage, a screened in porch with a hot tub, and a large, open deck.
I made my way upstairs and checked out the bedrooms. All the rooms were about the same size and decorated similarly, the only difference I noticed was the size of the bed in each room. I wondered if Dash and I would stay in the same room or if that was being presumptuous. We had slept in the same bed once before, but we didn’t consciously go to bed together that night. I would just err on the side of caution and pick a room with a queen size bed, leaving the king size, another queen, and two twin beds free for the picking.
Prospect Jamie brought my bags to my room. I thought now would be a good time to shower. I felt sticky and grimy from being in the back of that trailer for a few hours.
When I stepped out of the bathroom, dressed in my pajamas with a towel wrapped around my hair, I found Dash sitting on my bed, a plate a food and a drink on the nightstand, and a scowl on his face.
“What’s wrong?” I asked.
“Why did you pick this room?”
“It is a problem and your things have already been moved to another room.”
“Okay…” What was his problem? He told me to pick a room. I did.
“Did you hear me say that you are mine?” he snapped. I nodded.
“That means you sleep in my bed. Doesn’t mean we have to do anything you aren’t ready for, but it does mean you sleep beside me. Especially when my number one priority is keeping you safe. You are safest by my side.”
“I’m sorry, Dash. I wasn’t sure what to do and I didn’t want to assume that we were staying together.”
He sighed, but his expression softened, “I get that, but what did I tell you? We have to talk to each other. Next time you aren’t sure about something, just ask me, yeah?”
“Yeah, okay.” He made it sound so easy, so simple, which brought my insecurities to the surface. I had been trying so hard to fit in with everyone and overcome my social awkwardness instilled by my sheltered upbringing, but one little incident made me realize I still had a long way to go.
He picked up the plate of food and the drink. “Come on. I’ll take you to our room. I’ll come back and get your stuff from the bathroom while you’re eating.”
“Did you eat?”
“I’ll grab something after I get you settled. I’ll bring it back up here so we can go over plan A and plan B if things go sideways.”
I had just swallowed the last bite of food when Dash came through the door with his own plate of food. He sat down and began talking while eating. “If everything goes smoothly, we will just hang out up here until Phoenix gives the all clear. I have a couple different burner phones that I will use to check in with Phoenix at a set time every couple of days. I’ll start checking in more often as he gets closer to taking down Octavius’s operation. If I call in at the set check-in time and Phoenix doesn’t answer, we will grab our stuff and go to the Blackwings clubhouse in Devil Springs. It’s about 30 minutes from here. You with me so far?”
I nodded, listening intently. I wanted to make sure I didn’t miss anything he said.
Dash (Blackwings MC Book 1) Page 11