“Shit, I’m sorry.”
“It’s okay. I’m just glad you are okay.”
Jake calmed down and came back into the room, but didn’t say a word. The doctor had cleared me to leave even though he advised not to.
Maddy and Jake dropped me off at my house and before I closed the door I looked at Maddy, “Please don’t tell Jackie about this.”
“I already did.”
“Dammit, Maddy.”
“She’s my friend and your ex-girlfriend. She deserves to know.”
“I don’t want her getting on a fucking plane and coming here. It was no big deal. Please call her and tell her it was nothing.”
Jake gripped the steering wheel and Maddy shook her head, “I didn’t actually talk to her. I left her a message because she’s at work.”
“Maddy, call her and tell her not to come here.”
“Okay I will. Just go inside and relax.”
I thanked them for bringing me home and I went inside.
An hour later I was laying on the couch flipping through channels when I got a text and I looked at my phone.
Jackie: Are you okay?
Me: Yes. It was nothing.
Jackie: Are you kidding? Maddy said your car was totaled.
I had to have stitches in my forehead and was bruised up pretty badly, but I knew I had been really lucky. I should have been seriously hurt.
Me: It was not that bad, I promise. Maddy shouldn’t have even told you.
My phone lit up with a picture of Jackie and I at Halloween, the picture I sat to show up when she called me. I clicked on the “Answer” button.
“You’re right. She shouldn’t have. You should have.”
I sighed, “Jackie, it wasn’t a big deal. I didn’t want to bother you.”
“You could have been killed Andy. That’s a huge fucking deal!”
Jackie wasn’t a prude and she had no problem cussing, but she rarely said fuck. I couldn’t help the laugh that came out of my mouth.
“Are you laughing at me?”
I stopped my laughter and cleared my throat, “No. I’m sorry it’s just weird hearing you say “fuck”.”
That made her laugh a little. “Well yeah you got me all riled up.”
“You sound like a true Texan.”
“Shut up.”
I laughed again. I hadn’t laughed in months and it actually felt good except for the pain it caused in my bruised ribs. “I’m sorry. You are right. I should have told you.”
She sighed, “So are you okay?”
“Yeah, I’m just a little banged up. Had to get a few stitches in my forehead.”
“Oh no, not your purdy face!”
I laughed, “Purdy is not a word.”
She laughed again. God I missed that laugh. “It is down here.”
“Yeah. And how do you like it down there.”
“It’s okay.”
“Jackie, you don’t have to lie to me to protect my feelings. I want you to be happy.”
“It’s great. I mean really great. I have actual fans. Like the station has an official Facebook page and I actually have tons of fans on there that leave the sweetest comments.”
I smiled. I was glad she loved her job. “That’s awesome.”
“I miss you.”
Chapter 24
Jackie
Oh shit. I just blurted out that I had missed Andy. It was the truth though. When I got Maddy’s message that Andy had been in an accident I had never been more scared in my life. She had said he was fine, but I called her immediately.
She did her best to calm me down and said that he really was fine. I was about to find a flight home, but she told me that he didn’t want that. So I sent him a text and then I called him. He was actually in a good mood and made me laugh. I missed just talking and laughing with him so much that I had just said what came to mind.
He was quiet for a minute and then said, “I miss you too.”
I smiled, “I didn’t mean our relationship, I mean I do miss that a lot, but I just miss being friends and talking to you.”
Ugh, Jackie, just shut up!
“I miss talking to you too.”
“So why don’t we talk anymore?”
“Because it hurts like hell.”
“It hurts not talking also.”
“True.”
“So can we agree to try? To talk more I mean.”
“Yeah. I’d like that. So talk to me.”
I smiled. “What about?”
“Anything.”
“Well I have a roommate now. Her name is Krista and she’s a tiny little spitfire.”
He laughed. It was a sexy, deep laugh. “Well that’s cool. So you guys get along?”
“Yeah, she’s awesome. She thinks you are a God.”
“Oh yeah? She hot?”
I knew he was kidding and I rolled my eyes.“Shut up.”
“How does she know what I look like?”
“I showed her a few pictures of you.”
He sounded slightly serious, “So you didn’t delete me completely?”
“Are you crazy? I could never delete you.”
“Good.”
We talked for a couple of hours until we were both too exhausted and hung up with the promise that we would talk very soon.
The next morning I reached under my bed and took out the box I had put there when I first moved in. I opened it and pulled out several framed photos. One picture of Me, Maddy, and Michelle our sophomore in high school. One of the whole group at prom and one from graduation. There was a picture of Andy and I at Paul and Shelley’s wedding. I sat them all out. Putting most of them on the dresser and one picture of just me and Andy sitting together at the lake house, right after Jake and Maddy had got back together the last time, on the table next to my bed.
We looked so happy and maybe it wasn’t healthy, but I loved that picture and I didn’t want to erase Andy from my life.
Krista knocked on my door and I told her to come in. She walked in and looked around at all of the pictures. “You okay?”
“Yeah. I’m great.”
She sat on the bed and picked up the picture that was sitting on the table. “Oh that gorgeous boy. What made you put all of these out?”
“I don’t know. Tired of hiding from my past I guess.”
She nodded like she understood and knowing Krista, she probably did. “Is Andy okay?”
I had told her about the wreck before I started to text him. “Yeah he’s okay. We actually talked for a long time.”
She looked concerned, “Is that a good idea?”
“Yeah. We started out as friends. There is no reason why we can’t be friends now.”
“Except for you guys have seen each other naked. Like a lot.”
“Yeah. So we are very good friends.”
Andy and I had actually kept our word and texted with each other quite a bit over the next week and had even talked on the phone a couple of times.
The following week, Blake and I had just wrapped up and we were still sitting at the large desk we sit behind to report the news. We had been just talking about nothing really and then he said, “So are you ready to give me a chance yet?”
I laughed, “What?”
“Dinner?”
I shook my head, “We went over this.”
“It’s just dinner. Nothing scary.” An assistant came over to start cleaning up and she couldn’t keep her eyes off of Blake. Krista was right, so many girls would love to go out with him and for some reason he wanted to take me out.
“Okay.”
He looked surprised, “Seriously?”
“Yes. I like to eat I guess.”
He laughed, “Well that’s good. Not exactly the excitement I had hoped for, but I’ll take it. How about I pick you up tomorrow at eight?”
I agreed and gave him my address and then headed home a little surprised myself that I had accepted.
He picked me up the next day at Krista’s delight.
She told me it was time to try to move on and that I needed to go into it with an open mind, so I spent two hours getting ready and wore a dress that made me feel sexy.
He actually brought me flowers and took me to a very nice restaurant. As we were sitting in the stuffy restaurant my mind went to my first date with Andy. This was the exact kind of date we both had agreed would be boring when we went to the races.
I let out a quick laugh and Blake looked at me, concerned, “What’s funny?”
“Oh, nothing, sorry. I was just thinking about how different this is from the last “first date” I was on.”
Wow. I really need to work on lying. He didn’t look upset and actually looked intrigued, “Oh yeah? What was that like?”
I smiled, “Um. We went to dirt track races that were actually rained out. So we spent a lot of time talking in his car.”
“And this was the guy you left back in Kansas?”
I nodded as our food was placed in front of us at our table. “Yeah. Andy.”
“Hmm, no wonder you left.”
“It was actually really great.”
He looked at me quizzically, “Great?”
“Yeah. I mean everything went wrong, but it still felt right.”
“I guess. Tell me this was when you were a lot younger.”
I felt slightly irritated at his smug behavior, but continued being polite. “Yeah. Eighteen.”
“Well I guess that excuses it.”
I smiled even though I kind of wanted to punch him the throat. I changed the subject to work and we spent the rest of dinner mostly talking about him. He dropped me off at my house at the end of the night and leaned in for a kiss.
I turned my head so that he kissed my cheek. He looked frustrated, but just told me goodnight and left.
When I walked inside my apartment, Krista was on the couch with a really cute guy I recognized from the station. They were just watching a movie, but it certainly looked like a date. Krista looked at me excitedly, “So how was it?”
I shook my head, “Ugh. Not great.” I looked at the guy sitting next to her. “I’ll tell ya about it tomorrow.”
“Okay.”
I went to my room with my phone in my hand and laid down on my bed. I sent Andy a text:
Me: Ugh. Tell me your day was better than mine.
He replied almost instantly.
Andy: What happened?
I didn’t want to upset him, but I didn’t want to lie to him either. I also really wanted to talk to him.
Me: I had a date tonight.
He didn’t reply so I added.
Me: It was terrible. He showed up in a suit and tie, brought me flowers, and took me to a boring restaurant.
Andy: Ah, so not hotdogs and loud cars?
Andy: No rain?
Me: Nope. No screaming, wrestling kids either.
Andy: Well that sucks.
Me: Agreed.
Andy: So…are you going to see him again?
Me: Well we kinda work together so yeah, but romantically no. He’s probably pissed at me because I wouldn’t even let him kiss me.
Andy: I’m sorry it went badly.
Me: Are you?
Andy: No
Me: I’m going to sleep. Talk soon?
Andy: Night Jackie.
Me: Night Andy.
Andy
The week after my accident I had talked to Jackie a lot and it felt really good to have her back in my life. I hadn’t however talked to Jake and so I went over on to his house on a Sunday afternoon.
He was standing outside working on a classic truck he had bought a few months ago to fix up. I got out of my car and walked over to him. “Hey.”
He barely acknowledged me, but said, “Hey.”
“Can we talk?”
He pulled his head from underneath the hood and looked at me, “About what?”
“Why you’re so pissed off.”
He slammed the hood down to close it. “I’m fucking pissed because you don’t care if you live or die and apparently don’t give a damn about the people you leave behind.”
I knew this wasn’t about me, not entirely anyway. “Jake. I’m sorry. I swear I didn’t mean to wreck my car, it was an accident. I wasn’t drinking or texting or anything.”
He looked me square in the eyes, “Nothing?”
“Fine. I was thinking about Jackie and wasn’t concentrating as much as I should have been, but I wasn’t trying to die.”
He walked over to the front porch of his house and sat down. I walked over and sat next to him. “I went and talked to Maria.”
“Maria? Chris’s Maria.”
He nodded. Jake’s brother Chris had date Maria for years in high school and she was with him the night he died. “Yeah. Your wreck really fucked with my head. I have had so many questions about that night since it happened.”
I swallowed hard. Chris’s death had hurt us all badly. “What happened with Maria?”
“She’s living with her parents again. She finished school and even went to grad school, but the real world was too much. I guess she works in customer service over the internet. You should have seen her, Andy. She looked like a ghost.”
I hated hearing that she was doing so poorly, but I didn’t say anything and let him continue.
“I almost chickened out when I saw her, but I needed to know so I asked her what happened that night.”
“Shit. Did she tell you?”
He nodded, “Yeah. I told you that Chris was going to transfer schools to be with her.”
I nodded. I remember at the time I couldn’t wrap my head around anyone doing that.
He continued, “When I saw them that night, they looked so happy I had just assumed that she had agreed and they were back together. I guess that’s not what happened. Apparently she had told him that she was seeing someone at school and Chris being Chris he just told her that he was happy for her and had asked if they could just hang out that night and have a good time.”
Jake went on, “So that’s what I saw. Chris just hiding his feelings and them being “just friends”. I guess as the night went on they drank a shitload, especially Maria and they ended up kissing. Maria pushed him away and then I guess Chris got pissed and wanted to her to admit that she loved him.”
“They got into a huge fight and then Maria ran out to her car and was going to drive home. Chris begged her not to drive and said he would take her home. I guess he thought he was sober enough to drive. She was really drunk and let him. She said he drove her home fine. He kissed her again and told her she was the only one he would ever love and then he left.”
“Damn.”
“Yeah, you wanna know the real kicker?”
I didn’t say anything and he went on. “She didn’t even wait two minutes before trying to call him to tell him that she did love him and that she wanted to be with him. That she would let that other guy down easy and then they could be together.”
He added, “But he was already dying at the bottom of the fucking hill.”
I put my hand on his shoulder, “I’m so sorry man.”
He turned to me, “Don’t be sorry. Just don’t make their mistakes.”
I stood up. I didn’t want this to turn into being about me and Jackie. “Jake…”
“Chris is dead and Maria is walking around like a zombie. She broke up with that other guy and hasn’t been with anyone since. She has no desire to live her life because her soul mate, the person she was supposed to be with is gone.”
I didn’t say anything.
“What if you would have died in that wreck? What do you think would have happened to Jackie?”
“Jackie and I aren’t together; we aren’t talking about being together. She’s going out on dates and moving on. She’s not Maria. I’m not Chris. And we aren’t you and Maddy. Some relationships run their course and people move on.”
He stood up, “Yeah keep telling yourself that. I know you. I haven’t seen you so much as crack a smile since she
left. You are dying inside and you could have killed yourself.”
“I’m really okay. Jackie and I have been talking again. I know I went through a dark phase, but it’s getting better. I’m not going to die.”
“None of us could take it if you did.”
I nodded, “I know. I’ll keep that in mind and focus when I drive.”
“Good.”
“So is Maria in therapy or anything to help?”
“She said she went for a while, but nothing helped. I made her promise to call me if she ever needed anything and invited her to the wedding, but I don’t see her showing up.”
I had to change the subject. “Speaking of the wedding…do you want a real bachelor’s party or you gonna be a pansy like Paul and have a party with everyone before.”
He smiled, “Party at the lake house the day before.”
I nodded, knowing the answer before I even asked.
Chapter 25
Jackie
I continued to keep myself really busy all the way until July. I had talked to Andy a lot. I had also had a ton of calls with Maddy and Michelle about the upcoming wedding. According to Michelle, Maddy had turned into quite the bridezilla which was really funny because we all considered Maddy to be the sweetest out of our group.
I took a few days off for the wedding and I was in my room packing after work, the night before my flight, when Krista walked into my room. I smiled at her, “Hey!”
She sat on my bed, “Hi, almost finished packing?”
I nodded, “Yep. I know I’m only going for a few days, but I hate not being prepared.”
She smiled, but I could tell she had something on her mind. “So you are going to be around Andy an awful lot this weekend.”
I nodded, “Well he’s the best man and I’m a bridesmaid, so yeah.”
“Are you worried about that?”
I folded the new hot pink and white bikini I bought and put in my suitcase in case we went swimming. “No. We’ve been talking a lot. I don’t think it’s going to be weird at all.”
“Okay. You’ve been talking to him a ton, you have a romantic history, and it’s a wedding. People hook up at weddings.”
Evolve (Soulmates Book 4) Page 14