by Nia Arthurs
I hated him for making me the shrieking, insecure woman.
I had no right to be this invested. Deacon and I had no commitment, no understanding. Tonight, I’d become a pair of spread legs in which he could sate his needs and, the rest of the time, I took care of his son.
Still, I demanded, as if I had the right. “Who is she, Deacon?”
“She’s a colleague.” His gaze drifted.
“Ah. A colleague.” My heart dropped to my toes. “Do you usually meet your colleagues in your hotel room?”
More buzzing.
I ran a hand through my crazy hair and yelled, “Answer the damn phone!”
“Wait.” Deacon slid out of bed and stood beside me.
I stiffened at his nearness, hating myself for finding him attractive even now.
“I’ll leave. You stay here.” He picked up his clothes and left with his phone, closing the door securely behind him.
I yanked the pillows and tossed it at the door. One after another. They sank like rocks. Littered the floor. Did no damage to the man who’d taken a knife to my heart and caused so much pain.
It was my fault.
My choice.
I’d allowed myself to be fooled.
Naïve. Stupid.
I threw myself in the bed where Deacon’s warmth still lingered and cried myself to sleep.
28
Deacon
Angel’s muted sobs tore my heart out from my chest.
My phone rang.
Rhia’s name appeared on the screen.
If she were in front of me now, I would slash her throat.
Not because of her threats or her manipulation, but because she had caused my Angel misery. And so had I, by default.
I should have made my intentions clear from the start. Should have assured Angel of my love for her so there was not a doubt in her mind and no room for jealousy.
My fingers itched to turn the doorknob, return to her room and convince her now, but it wasn’t the time. Even if I laid my soul bare, she wouldn’t believe me.
I moved away from her door and slammed my thumb against the ‘answer’ button. Slapping the phone to my cheek, I hissed, “You better have a good reason for calling.”
“Did you know your voice is especially coarse when you’re angry? It’s rather stimulating.”
“We had a deal.” I gripped the phone tight enough to break it. “You said you’d give me more time to think.”
“I changed my mind. Another job is waiting.”
“I politely decline.”
Her voice took on a sharp edge. “Do you know what’s at stake here?”
I thought of the security footage of the island. There were no signs of intrusion and it was impossible for anyone to gain entrance without my security system picking it up.
My job had made me paranoid, which was the reason I’d chosen an island with a house built on a hill. I wanted to see my enemies coming.
There had been no intruders. I was certain of that.
Rhia’s threats were toothless.
I was calling her bluff.
“Touch my son or my woman and I will kill you slowly,” I said, my voice calm. “Send someone after us and I will expose you to the law that you fear.”
“You are making a mistake.”
“We both have things to lose. Find another operative, Rhia. Let’s never speak again.”
I hung up and sucked in a sharp breath.
It was over.
Done.
Rhia and all she represented stood in the way of a life with Angel. Nostalgia had blinded me for a moment, but the truth was… I didn’t want my old job.
I wanted my son to grow up with a mother’s touch. I wanted my arms filled with Angel and my bed filled with our love.
Everything I’d said to her was true.
I wanted Angel to be my home.
Now… how did I convince her of that?
29
Angel
The boat ride to San Pedro was painfully tense. I did my best not to look at Deacon, to just pretend he wasn’t there. My nerves were a jumbled mess and he looked too good in that Henley and jeans.
Just seeing him in my periphery hurt.
I turned away.
This morning, I’d woken to a raging headache. When I stumbled outside, Reid was already dressed and Deacon was making breakfast.
His eyes had locked on me. Their green depths whispered that we needed to talk, but I just ignored him and his food.
Reid climbed over me, his tiny feet stomping my lap and breaking into my thoughts. I set him back down so he was seated and away from the boat’s edge.
Harsh winds whipped my ponytail back and forth. The sea was a churning grey, matching the overcast skies. Strangely, as we got closer to the mainland, the weather cleared up.
Was that a sign?
Should I leave the island?
I’d been considering it last night but, in the end, I couldn’t leave just because I’d made a stupid mistake. Deacon had paid me in advance and I would serve my time. It was my responsibility and that didn’t go away because his body had been my desire last night.
I sighed and held on tightly to Reid.
When we got to the mainland, Deacon hired a golf cart taxi to take us to the airport. It was my first time on a plane, an experience that managed to make me smile despite my circumstances.
Reid seemed excited too.
In the midst of our shared cheering, I found Deacon watching me with a pleased look and quickly wiped my grin.
For the rest of the trip, I glared at the wispy clouds and cursed the gorgeous aerial view of the coast.
No way was I giving Deacon the satisfaction of my smile.
When we got to Belize City, it felt like I’d entered a new country despite the fact that I’d grown up here. I’d become so accustomed to the silence and isolation of the island that returning to the hustle and bustle almost grated my senses.
Thankfully, it didn’t take long to get to the hospital.
We walked into the foyer together.
I stooped to Reid’s level. The cutie pie was dressed to impress in a white shirt and pressed khakis. I’d brushed his hair and put in some gel.
My fingers itched to take a picture.
I clamped his shoulders instead. “I’ll be right back. Make sure you behave for the doctor.”
“Abel,” Reid cried my name and clung to me.
My heart stirred.
This little guy was another reason I was hesitant to leave the island.
“I’ll see you soon. Okay?” I kissed his forehead.
Deacon picked Reid up and held him. Green eyes boring into me, he said, “I have my cell. Call me if you need to.”
I nodded. The friction between us made it uncomfortable to stare into his eyes. Turning without another word, I strolled down the hall.
A quick stop at the nurse’s station pointed me in the right direction.
A few seconds later, I stood outside my dad’s hospital room.
Mom was sitting at Dad’s bedside holding his hand when I entered. I observed them quietly, letting the weariness of the past few days roll from my shoulders.
Dad said something that made Mom laugh. When he coughed, a tight, worried knot formed between Mom’s thin eyebrows. She grabbed a cloth and dotted at his dark brown skin.
In sickness and in health. For most, it was just a line in a marriage vow, but it was a principle of life that my parents clung to. Their love for each other hadn’t wavered.
I’d wanted something like that. So badly. If I was honest, a part of me wanted that with Deacon. But that kind of thought was stupid and had contributed to the mistakes I’d made when I tumbled into bed with him last night.
Mom glanced up.
I wiggled my fingers. “Hi.”
“Angel.” She set Dad’s hand gently back on the bed and rushed me.
We both burst out bawling.
When the snot plugged our noses to the point tha
t we couldn’t breathe, Mom released me, leaving my shoulders damp from her tears.
I ran to my father and hugged him next. “Daddy!”
He smelled of medicine. His bones were thin and brittle. Normally rich, dark chocolate skin had turned sallow. But he was still my father. He was still my refuge. The person I could count on through thick and thin.
“I missed you so much,” I sobbed.
He ran his hand down my hair. “It’s okay, honey. Everything’s going to be alright.”
That wasn’t true.
I had feelings for the wrong man.
I owed that man far too much money.
Because of my debt, I couldn’t leave that man’s side.
“It’s all going to be okay,” Dad whispered.
And in that moment, against all odds, I knew he was right.
30
Angel
My parents refused to discuss Dad’s treatment or anything about his cancer. Instead, they plied me with questions about my summer job.
I answered as honestly as I could without admitting that I lived on a private island with my student and that I’d gotten naked with his father. Twice.
Things were going smoothly… until I let it slip that Reid was in the building.
“Reid is here?” Mom flapped her hand. “At this hospital? He’s getting checked up here?”
I slapped my mouth. Shoot. “Uh…”
“Invite him over,” Dad said. “I want to meet the young man getting tutored by the best teacher in Belize.”
My heart thumped.
If I invited Reid, that meant my parents would meet Deacon.
The thought was too horrifying to consider.
My folks would take one look at us and know. I’d been exposed enough last night. I didn’t need to bare all again today.
“I don’t think that’s a good idea. Besides, Dad, you must be tired.”
“I feel better than I have in a while,” he said, eyes glittering. His bright smile confirmed the statement.
“Let me text Reid’s father.” I pulled out my phone. “He might have left the hospital already.”
Mom peered over my shoulder.
I groaned.
There was no way I could fake it now.
I texted slowly.
ME: Are you still at the hospital? My parents wanted to see Reid.
Mom smiled, patted my shoulder and shifted away. While her attention diverted to Dad, I texted at warped speed.
ME: It’s okay if you’re not comfortable. I’ll tell my parents you left.
I didn’t wait for a response.
“Mom and Dad, bad news. I don’t think—”
My phone chirped.
DEACON: We’re coming.
I forced myself to sound cheerful. “They’re on their way.”
“Fantastic.”
I dreaded the moment Deacon walked through the door and that moment came way too quickly.
As soon as the knock sounded, Mom popped out of her seat. “Must be them.“
I waited by Dad’s hospital cot, breathless and worried, while Mom skipped like Dorothy down the yellow brick road and opened the door.
Just act normal, Angel.
Deacon stepped in, his presence sucking all the air from the room. Daddy sat up and I helped him to rise, propping the pillows behind his back so he could be comfortable.
“Hello, young man,” Dad greeted warmly.
Reid ducked behind his father’s leg.
“He’s so cute,” Mom squealed, edging around Deacon to peer at Reid. “Hello.”
“Say hi, Reid.” Deacon nudged him forward. “These are Angel’s parents.”
Reid’s fingers clung more firmly to his father’s jeans.
“He’s shy,” Deacon and I said at the same time.
We glanced at each other.
I looked away first, my throat going dry.
“Thank you for stopping by,” Mom said. “I hope you don’t mind.”
Deacon gave my mother a swoon-worthy smile. “It’s our pleasure, ma’am. We consider Angel a part of the family.”
“I see.” My mother eyed him up and down. “Are you married, young man?”
“Mama!” I hissed.
“No, ma’am.”
“What about Reid’s mother?” Dad asked.
“She died in childbirth.”
My gaze flickered to his.
Dad frowned. “So you weren’t married to her?”
“No, sir.”
Mom tsked. “Stop asking personal questions, babe. Everyone has their own story.”
“I just want to know what kind of man he is.”
“One that made too many mistakes,” Deacon said. “But Reid isn’t one of them. My son taught me what love is. How to put another life ahead of my own.” His eyes landed on me. “I wouldn’t trade that for the world.”
“The woman you choose will benefit from what you’ve learned and who you’ve grown into.” Mom grinned. “Scars are there to remind us of how far we’ve come.”
Deacon nodded.
Reid pointed at me and took a quick, unbalanced step forward. “Abel.”
“Yes, that’s Angel,” Deacon gently corrected.
Reid stumbled over to me and I held him close. “Hi, baby.” I pressed kisses to his sweet cheeks and turned to Deacon. “What did the doctors say?”
“He grew. Not much else.” Deacon chuckled. “I could have figured that out myself.”
Mom smiled.
“Angel speaks very highly of your son, young man.”
“She does the same with you.” Deacon nodded to my father. “You’re the most important man in her life.”
“Astute observation.” Mom clasped her hands together.
I could see wedding bells ringing in her eyes. Before she got too carried away, I piped up. “Reid’s probably tired.”
“Yes, we didn’t mean to keep you,” Mom said, picking up on my cues. “It was such a pleasure, Deacon and Reid.” She tickled Reid’s back.
The baby smiled shyly.
“Come on, Reid.” Deacon approached me, so close I could smell his cologne. His hands brushed my arms as he took Reid back. “Let’s give Angel’s parents a wave.”
Reid flapped his hands from side to side.
My mom melted into a pool of awe.
My dad smiled.
“Angel, can I see you a minute?” Deacon jerked his chin to the door.
I followed him outside.
Deacon paused in the hallway. “Your parents are great.”
“They are.” I rocked back on my heels.
“Do you want to stay with them until they leave?”
My eyes shot up. “I-I can’t. Reid—”
“Will be fine with me until you return.”
My heart thawed and I steeled myself against the sensation. “If you’re trying to get back into my good books by using my parents…”
“I am.” He pressed closer and Reid clapped. “I’ll win your trust back by any means necessary because the alternative isn’t something I’m willing to consider.”
My breath hitched.
Think about Rhia. Don’t fall for it.
I pushed him away. “Do you know why I got so angry at Humphries back then?”
“Humphries?” Deacon made a face. “Why bring him up?”
“He lied to me. I hate being deceived, Deacon, and I hate playing games even more.”
He licked his lips. “So do I.”
Reid bucked, bored with our conversation.
Deacon set his son on the floor and held his hand while speaking quietly, “Rhia is nothing to me. I’ve never had a physical relationship with her and I never will.”
“Then why did she call last night?”
Reid started fussing. “Dada, go.”
I ran a hand through my hair and put my irritation away. This wasn’t the time or the place for a heavy conversation. “Forget it. That’s none of my business.”
“It is.”
�
��No, it’s not.”
“Angel…”
“Dada!” Reid screamed.
He sighed. “What I feel for you isn’t a lie.”
I glanced away, crossing my arms over my chest.
Deacon swung Reid into his arms. “Call me when you’re ready to go home. I’ll come for you.” He paused and studied me with a worried frown. “You will be back right?”
“It’s what you paid for, isn’t it?” I snapped.
His expression shattered.
I spun and stomped to my parent’s hospital room. Regret slammed my gut. I shouldn’t have said that.
But it was too late to take it back.
“He seems nice,” Mom chimed from the couch.
I straightened. “Oh, Reid? He’s fantastic.”
“Deacon.” Mom gave me a dry look.
“I wouldn’t know. He hasn’t been around that much.” Which was technically true.
“He couldn’t take his eyes off you,” Mom mused.
Dad cleared his throat. “Is there something going on between you two, Angel?”
“No.” It wasn’t a lie.
There wasn’t anything going on between me and Deacon.
Not anymore.
31
Deacon
Angel’s harsh words echoed in my ears while I waited for her call. My heart bled and ached, yearning to clear up the misunderstandings between us, to touch her, hear her laugh, see her smile.
My love for her was yet another weakness.
I didn’t have time to be distracted. Rhia had been quiet and though I’d left no question about what I would do if she stepped out of line, I knew she wasn’t one to admit defeat easily.
As a precaution, I’d beefed up security around the island and kept Reid indoors where I could keep my eyes on him at all times.
It drove my boy crazy as he was used to running freely on the beach, but I couldn’t take any chances. Rhia was a loose cannon and, until I got confirmation that she was no longer a threat, we had to move carefully.
It bothered me that Angel was in the city, away from my protection. Which was why I’d put measures in place to keep her safe.
Even so, I would prefer if she were back on the island with me. I missed her presence, her fragrance, her laughter.