“Ready as I’ll ever be,” he answered cheerfully, but I knew he was as sad as I was.
Just then Jude and Beau came storming out of the apartment with their bags in tow. Jude and Ryder seemed excited, but Beau looked about as happy to be leaving as Kris did. He was obviously worried about leaving his fourteen year old sister Sadie behind with their mother. Sharon Cavanaugh was about as good of a mother as mine was. They were both worthless drunks but while Crystal seemed to lean more toward drugs, Sharon’s addiction was men. Like the abusive-in-every-sense-of-the-word kind of men.
With her huge brown eyes and snowy blonde hair, Sadie Cavanaugh was a very beautiful girl already and I know Beau was more than a little worried. The losers Sharon tended to gravitate toward were men that would rough her up once they’d gotten their fill of her and now that Sadie wouldn’t have Beau here to keep them away from her, we all knew he was going to have a hard time being away. I made a mental note to keep my eyes out for her when I could but then internally chuckled. I couldn’t even protect myself from Crystal and I was officially an adult. How was I going to help protect a teenager from a bad home life?
I held onto Kris for as long as I could while everyone tossed their belongings in the van. Once everyone was packed and everything was loaded up, Ryder, Jude, and Beau all gathered around us and I readied myself for the hardest thing I was ever going to do…say goodbye to my boys. I promised myself then and there that no matter what, I wasn’t going to let them see me cry. I wasn’t going to turn this huge opportunity for them into a sad thing.
“Well, Jess, you take care of yourself while we’re gone, okay?” Jude asked, taking my arm gently and pulling me into a warm, brotherly hug. “I’m going to miss you, pretty girl.”
“Oh Jude,” I answered, and my promise to myself was instantly broken as the tears began to fall at his sweet words. “I’ll miss you too.”
“Me next,” said Beau, and Jude quickly released me. “It’s going to be so weird not seeing you every day this summer.”
“It’s o-only thr-three months,” I stuttered as I hugged him tightly. “I’ll b-be okay.”
He squeezed me a little tighter and whispered into my ear, “Can you keep an eye on Sadie for me? I’m not going to be here every day to-”
I nodded.
“I promise,” I answered before he released me. I only had a few seconds to wipe my eyes before Ryder grabbed my hands.
He slipped a piece of paper in one hand and said, “This is the number to the prepaid cell phone. One of us will have it on us at all times so if you need us for anything or if there’s trouble, you call okay? Anytime, night or day. I don’t care if we are on stage at the time. The minute you call everything stops.”
I wrapped my arms around him and cried into his chest.
“Ryder…thank you.”
“I’m going to miss you Jess,” he said, hugging me back. He released me and all of the guys got into the van so I could be alone to say goodbye to the one person I didn’t want to say goodbye to.
The minute they were all in the van, Kris took my face in his hands. His eyes were full of guilt and sadness.
“Come with us,” he said desperately.
“W-what?”
“Jude was right yesterday…you can be our wardrobe girl or our assistant or something. Bands have those kinds of people to help them all the time.”
I placed my hands over his and sighed, more tears falling down my cheeks.
“Kris, I can’t and we both know that. I’m sure I’ll be able to go with you one day but this is something you need to do on your own this time out. I’ll be okay here, I promise,” I stated, trying to convince myself of that too. The truth was that I was terrified of being home with Crystal but I was trying my hardest not to let it get to me.
A single tear slid out of his eye and he pressed his forehead to mine.
“I can’t…I can’t be without you, Jess. I love you so fucking much that it hurts. I can’t be away from you for three months. It’s impossible.”
“I’ll be okay,” I repeated, the tears falling down my face uncontrollably. “This is a good thing, Kris, for everyone. I’ll still be here when you come home, still loving you like I always have.”
“You promise?”
“Of course. Actually, I’m pretty sure I’ll love you more.”
“Jess,” he whispered roughly before crashing his lips to mine. My knees were beginning to buckle as he kissed me so passionately, so possessively. When he broke away, I was breathless.
“Y-you’ve got to go or you’ll be late getting to Eerie on time,” I choked out.
He held onto me tightly and said, “I love you Jess. Please…please be careful while we’re gone.”
“Don’t worry, I will. Come on, the guys are waiting.” He let me go and swiped away his tears quickly. As he opened the side door of the van, I declared to him, “I love you more than my life, Kris. Don’t forget me.”
“Never ever, baby,” he replied, looking at me one more time before reluctantly climbing into the van. My heart was aching like it never had before as I waved one more time and watched the only friends-hell, the only family I had-start to drive away. Just as they pulled out onto the street, Kris turned to look at me one more time and mouthed, “Love you Jess,” before they disappeared onto the streets of Cincinnati.
In that moment, I’d never felt so alone in all my life. Luckily for me Crystal’s car wasn’t in her usual parking spot so I ran into the building quickly to my apartment. As soon as I was inside, I quickly ran to my room, shutting the door behind me and locking myself inside. I collapsed on my bed and there was nothing I could do to stop the ache in my chest as I buried my face in my pillow and cried like I’d never cried before.
This was going to a brutal three months.
Chapter 7
Kris
Three Months Later
“You know, I never thought I’d say this, but it’s so good to be back in Cincinnati,” I said as we got off the highway on our exit into town.
“You mean, it’ll be so good to be back between Jessie’s legs in about five minutes,” Jude joked, and I threw an empty fast-food cup at his head.
“Shut up, dickhead. Drive faster, Ryder,” I complained. “I promised her we’d be back by four and it’s already thirty minutes past that.”
“Well, we hit traffic on the way out of Indianapolis, so it’s not my fault. Relax, we’ll be back in just a few minutes,” he said, as he turned down a side road that was only a few streets away from his house.
These last three months had been the best and worst of my whole life. I’d gotten to live my dream of traveling around with my band and rocking out for new fans all over the country. While I loved every minute of it, it wasn’t the same without Jessie by my side. I’d missed her so much and no matter what, even if I had to tie her up and toss her into the back of the van, she wasn’t staying behind if we got to tour again. No fucking way.
Another good thing about being home was the fact that I was never going back to the shitty apartment complex I’d been raised in. While we were on the road Jude, Beau, Ryder, and I had decided to get an apartment together, and hopefully Jess would be coming with us. Alan had found us a five bedroom studio apartment not far from their house and it was big enough that if she wanted, Jess could have her own room.
It was a huge step for us, but it was one that I was sure she wouldn’t mind. All the guys loved her like a sister and wanted her out of Crystal’s place as much as I did, so we decided pretty quickly to ask her to come with us. They all felt the same as I did; while the tour was fun, it wasn’t the same without her there. I just hoped that when I asked her she said yes.
As we turned onto Ryder’s street, I started twitching in anticipation. I looked as far as I could down the road and as soon as my eyes landed on the most beautiful girl in the world standing on Ryder’s front porch, I smiled so widely that my face hurt. Jessie was standing next to Rose, beaming at us with pride. As the va
n turned into the driveway, Ryder had barely put it in park before I opened the side door and jumped out.
“Kris!” she exclaimed, quickly stepping off the porch and running toward me. I held my arms out for her and in less than a second, she jumped up and wrapped her arms around my neck.
I pulled her up and held on tight as she wrapped her mile-long legs around my waist. Burying my face in her hair, I took a long, deep breath and inhaled her delicious floral scent.
“Fuck I’ve missed you,” I murmured against her neck and she giggled.
“I’ve missed you too, Kris. So much,” she answered, and when I moved my head back up to kiss her, she had tears in her eyes.
“Aw, baby,” I said, kissing her cheeks, “don’t cry. I’m home.”
“Finally,” she answered, smiling at me through her tears.
“There’s something I’ve been dying to do for a long time and we can’t go any further until it’s done.”
“What is it?” she asked, her brows drawing together.
“Come here,” I whispered, and pulled her lips to mine.
She moaned and opened her mouth to me, inviting me inside. I backed us up until we were resting against the side of the van and I held her as tight as I could as I gave her three months worth of kisses.
I didn’t know how I was ever going to leave her again because she tasted like the sweetest honey and smelled even better than I remembered. She was like my own personal drug of choice and I could get high on her every fucking day.
Jessie and I were so lost in each other that it took me a minute to stop kissing her when she suddenly pulled her lips from mine.
“What’s wrong?” I asked, breathless and panting. I heard laughing behind me and I turned my head to see Alan, Rose, and the guys all chuckling and smiling at us. I looked back at Jessie and her cheeks were a beautiful scarlet red.
“Listen son, I know it’s been a while since you two have seen each other, but maybe we can get inside before you two start losing your clothes,” Alan said, and I grinned.
“Sorry,” I apologized unconvincingly, and moved away from the van. She unwound her legs from my waist and I gently set her down, but I still kept my arms around her. I wasn’t letting her go any time soon.
I held her close to me while we walked inside the house and she immediately began asking me all about my summer away. She asked me all kinds of questions about the tour, the cities we visited, and all the new fans we had made. She was talking so much that I hadn’t had a chance to ask her how she had been doing while I was gone. Every time I would try to ask her any questions, she would shrug me off and quickly change the subject, and it was making me worry. I was more determined now to get her alone to ask her about moving in with us.
Rose had made us all a huge dinner and we ate like we were starving. The guys and I had been living off of all kinds of take out for the past three months and had really missed eating food that wasn’t served through a drive through window. After we were all full and dinner was put away, I took Jessie’s hand and led her out to the back yard. Once we were outside, I led her to the bench swing and we both sat down.
“Alone at last,” I said softly into her ear and she shivered as I pulled her into my arms. The late night summer air was thick and humid, but there was a light breeze it felt perfect to me.
“Finally,” she answered, wrapping her arm around my waist and sliding her fingers under my shirt. Her fingers explored my abs, tracing the ridges and making me tense with need. I was about to explode; I hadn’t gotten laid in three months and I think the last few hours being near Jessie and not being able to give her a proper hello was killing me.
“So, how bad did you really miss me?” I asked, kissing her hair.
Jessie looked up at me and her startling blue eyes were alive with need. Her fingers moved lower and barely dipped inside the waist of my jeans.
“I’ve missed you so much that if we weren’t in a place where people could see us, I’d already be naked and would’ve straddled your lap five minutes ago,” she answered softly.
I groaned and grabbed my quickly swelling erection out of instinct. “Fuck Jess, you’re killing me here, baby. Can we get out of here? I need to get you alone.”
“Where can we go? I’m sure you don’t want to go back to your old place, and Crystal has another prick over tonight. Besides, she’s been bitching at me even more lately so I definitely don’t want to go there.”
“I actually had a place in mind,” I answered, feeling the key Alan gave to each of us burning a hole in my pocket.
“You did?” she asked, anticipation in her voice. “Why the hell are we still here then? Let’s go!”
She stood up and took my hand and pulled me up off the swing. I smiled at her rush to get me alone and we quickly called out our goodbyes as we ran to my old truck and climbed inside.
I drove the short distance to the new apartment building and when I parked and shut off the engine, she looked at me with a puzzled expression.
“Where are we?” she asked. “When you said you had a place for us to go, I thought you meant another hotel room again. What is this place?”
Smiling, I turned to her and answered, “This is home.”
“I don’t understand. Home?”
I leaned in and kissed her lips quickly before I jumped out of the truck. She followed me out and once she shut the passenger door, I took her hand and led her inside. She was silent as we climbed the stairs and reached the front door of the new apartment.
I slid the key into the lock and once I opened the door, I quickly pulled her inside and locked it behind us. I flicked on the light switch and smiled as I laid eyes on my new place for the first time.
“Like I said, Jess, this is home. I know that none of us wanted to go back to that old shitty complex once we got back here and Ryder’s been talking about getting a place on his own, so Alan found an apartment big enough for all of us while we were on the road. Isn’t it great?” I asked, grinning.
“It’s perfect,” Jessie replied, looking around and taking it all in. Rose and Alan must have took it upon themselves to get the majority of our things and brought them over, including a couch, love seat, recliner, refrigerator, stove, microwave, and table with chairs. It wasn’t new furniture at all, but it was new to us and it looked perfect to me.
As we walked around the open and spacious studio apartment, I noticed that all of our things had been placed into the individual rooms. I wasn’t sure who wanted what room but I didn’t care. As long as I was far away from my dad and that hell hole I was raised in I could live in a box in a field and be happy.
“Geez, this place is huge. How many rooms are there?” Jessie asked me, peeking in each room as we looked around.
I stopped and turned to her. Taking her hands in mine, I answered, “Five.”
“Five? Why five? There are only four of you guys living here.”
I sighed and let go of one of her hands. I reached down into my pocket and pulled out another key. “The fifth room is yours, Jess.”
“What?” she asked, her eyes wide and full of surprise. “It…it’s mine?”
“You really didn’t think that I was going to leave you behind with Crystal, did you? I love you and want you with me, baby. The last three months without you have fucking killed me and I’m never doing it again.”
“Kris, this is incredible. I love you too.”
“So I take that response as a yes?”
She smiled so widely that I was sure it had to have hurt. She jumped into my arms and quickly wrapped her legs around my waist. “Yes! I say yes! When can I move in?”
“Fuck, you don’t have to leave if you don’t want to. I will get your things tomorrow.”
“Really?”
“Fuck yes,” I answered before I pressed my lips roughly to hers. She opened her mouth and moaned as I thrust my tongue inside.
“Which one is your room?” she breathed, tossing her head back as I trailed kisses down her nec
k.
“I have no fucking idea,” I answered and she laughed as I led us into the nearest room. As I gently tossed her on the bed, I noticed one of Jude’s extra bass guitars resting against the wall. I smiled as I gently tossed her on the bed.
“I think this is Jude’s room,” she answered.
“Well it’s about to get broken in,” I answered, taking off my shirt and unbuckling my belt.
Jessie giggled and said, “He’d be so proud.”
I leaned over her and she lightly gasped before I kissed her lips softly.
“You look so fucking sexy lying here right now. I can’t wait to taste every inch of you.”
“Kris,” she whispered breathlessly, combing her fingers through my hair. I groaned and sighed…I loved when she’d do this. She pulled my lips back to hers and I kissed her passionately as my hands found the bottom of her shirt. I quickly stripped it off of her and she slid her shorts down and tossed them to the floor. She was lying on the bed in nothing but her lacy bra and tiny panties and I almost started to drool.
“Lose the pants, drummer boy,” she demanded, and I smiled at her as I stood up and slid out of my pants and boxers. She started breathing even harder when her eyes roamed down my body and rested on my rock hard cock.
“You missed this too, didn’t you?” I asked her, taking my erection into my hand and stroking it slowly.
She nodded her head and moaned. “Oh yeah,” she answered, her voice husky and thick with desire as she quickly took off her bra and tossed it to the floor. I leaned back down and lightly rubbed her between her legs, making her inhale sharply.
“Well I bet I’ve missed this even more,” I said and slid my fingers inside her panties and quickly found her entrance, which was soaking wet. I groaned as I slid one long finger into her sweet pussy.
“Oh my God,” she cried out and rocked her hips into my hand. I kept up my rhythm while I used the other hand to strip her panties off. Her legs fell open wide and I leaned my face down and inhaled her scent. I’d missed her unique smell and I’d especially missed the taste of her on my tongue. I removed my finger and licked her right where my hand had just been.
[Bad Blooded Rebel Series 06] - Deeper Page 10