“Nah man, she said she doesn’t want to get beat up again. I think you ruined all rugby games for her.” He was joking but I saw Daniel’s shoulders stiffen, the cut in his eyes before he hid it behind the coldness. When he spoke it was with exact politeness. “Of course. I understand. Your first rugby game was not something you would want to remember. It didn’t turn out the way it was supposed to, the way I wanted it to.”
I tried to repair an already broken situation. “No, it didn’t, but I didn’t care. It didn’t matter. I mean, I liked that day. Oh whatever!”
Now both boys were staring at me confused. “Huh?”
I rolled my eyes and got out of the Wrangler. “Maleko’s wrong. He doesn’t know anything about what I want. I’m staying to watch the game. Of course I am.”
And with that, I stalked away from both of them, unwilling to listen to any more. I walked to the field, joining the pack of other onlookers as the boys got their gear on. I wanted to be alone with my thoughts but a voice cut through my swirl of emotions.
“Leila.”
It was the last person in the universe I wanted to talk to. Mele and a cluster of other girls from school.
“Mele.”
“Coming to watch the boys play?”
“Um yeah just for a bit anyways.”
She looked at me appraisingly. “We thought you’d gone back to the States. What happened to you?”
“Oh, um, I was sick. Much better now.”
Her dark eyes appraised me thoughtfully. “Yes, you do look different.” We stood in silence and watched the boys warm up, running the length of the field. My eyes trying not to linger on Daniel’s perfect form.
“So when will you be moving back home?”
I tried to make my tone as artificially casual as hers.“Probably not for a long while. I’m staying with my mother now and so this is pretty much home for me.”
Mele smiled at me. Sweetly. “Oh. That’s too bad.”
Before I could react to her venom, the ref blew a whistle and the game began. Mele and her coven moved away further down the sidelines, leaving me to watch the game alone.
The roughness of the play wasn’t as shocking to me as it had been the first time. I was following the game with mild interest when suddenly, there was a scuffle on the field, a scrum that refused to break and scatter. But at its heart were only orange and yellow uniforms. Two. Daniel and Maleko. One had the other in a chokehold, the other reaching up to throw a juddering punch at the other’s jaw. The ref was frantically blowing the whistle, the rest of the team were trying to break them up, dodging blows as they pulled the two apart. It took three of the forward pack to restrain Daniel, Maleko was shaking loose from the hold of two others, wiping blood off his chin, as he cursed at an enraged Daniel.
“Break it up, break it up right now!” the coach was furious. “Just what the hell do you two think you’re doing? Are you crazy? You’re going to cost us the game, get off the field both of you, now!”
It took all my restraint to not run on to the field to Daniel’s side. His three companions escorted him towards the sidelines, and my eyes anxiously searched for any sign of injury. Apart from a trickle of blood from a cut lip though, he seemed to be okay and I breathed a sigh of relief. As if sensing my gaze, he chose then to look up, and our eyes met. His expression was unreadable, but his whole body stiffened and seemed to scream accusingly at me before he turned away, shaking off the hand of his teammate and stalking towards his green truck. I stood, frozen, and watched as Mele ran lightly after him. “Daniel, Daniel, wait up. Are you okay? Daniel!”
I wanted so badly to be her at that moment. More than anything. To be a regular girl. Able to run after the boy she loved. I couldn’t bear to see any more. I turned and ran back to the Wrangler, and drove away without a backward glance. I needed to get as far away from Mele as possible. Because all I could think about was how easy it would be to incinerate her with a single thought.
That night at dinner, I was quiet and Nafanua sensed my mood. Over Netta’s pineapple pie
(which wasn’t half as nice as Aunty Matile’s, I thought wistfully) she probed. “So, how was school today? Any problems?”
“No. It was fine.”
“Ah, so none of the things you were worried about happened? You didn’t blow up, set anybody on fire, burn the school down to the ground?” Her face was serious but her eyes sparked with mischief.
My retort was sour. “No. None of that happened. Just a regular day. Like a regular girl.”
My own answer gave me a mild boost of lightness. Because it was true. I had had a regular day. Not once did I want to blow up. I had thought about fire – but only because I wanted to stop thinking about Daniel and Mele walking away from me. Together. My quick flush of happiness evaporated just as quickly with that memory. Nafanua picked it up immediately.
“So why are you down? What else happened? What ‘regular girl’ stuff has you moping? Was it that boy?”
“No.” I refused to discuss Daniel with Nafanua. I didn’t want her anywhere near the mere mention of his name. I leapt to another topic, sure it would distract the both of us. “Everyone at school is getting ready for Culture night. You know, the dancing and the singing stuff. Our house is doing this dance and I don’t know how to siva and I feel kinda like an idiot. A clumsy idiot.”
She smiled. With unrestrained pleasure, pushing her chair away from the table. “Leila, you could never be a clumsy idiot. Even if you wanted to. You are my daughter. You are telesā. We are not clumsy. Foolish child.” The smile softened the words. “Come.” She went into the living room, choosing music at the stereo.
Confused, I followed. “What? What are you doing? And what do you mean, what does dancing have to do with telesā?
Nafanua flicked her hands impatiently. “Leila, where do you think our people first derived the siva from? The gift of dance was a gift from the gods. Pele is the goddess of dance and you – you foolish child – are a daughter of Pele. Hello!” Hands on her hips, she regarded me with frank bemusement. “Now come over here. All you need is one lesson and you will be dancing circles around the rest of those girls.”
I shook my head at her excitement. “Nafanua, I hate to burst your bubble, but I don’t think it’s going to happen. I’m not from here, I mean, I didn’t grow up here, I haven’t been dancing the siva all my life like the other girls. I have no clue how to do any of it and I think it’s a bit late to expect any Pele sparks to be rubbing off on me now.”
She waved away my protests, pulling me by the hand to the centre of the room. “Shush. Now listen, listen to the music.”
I wanted to argue but she wouldn’t let me. “Shush! Listen.”
We stood there in the deepening twilight and listened. The song skipped and fluttered through the air, tugging at me. “Now watch.” Nafanua began to dance, like the way the girls at school had danced today, the same but different. Her entire body moved in one fluid movement, her hands told a story and it was impossible not to be in awe of her. She pulled me to stand beside her, “Come here, do what I do.”
It took an hour but it was an hour well spent. By the end of the impromptu lesson, I was thrilled with the new discovery. Not only did I know how to dance the Samoan siva, I loved it. The beauty of it reminded me of my fire when it pulsed all around me, the worshipful thrill was the same. Again I had to admit, my mother was right. I was telesā. And telesā knew how to siva.
I went to bed tired but happy. Tomorrow I would join in the dance practice. I was a clumsy idiot no longer.
ELEVEN
At school the next day, Simone and Sinalei were both waiting for me when I drove in. Excited.
“So tell us … tell us!”
“Tell you what?”
“About yesterday. We heard about Maleko and Daniel fighting, what’s going on?”
“Nothing. Absolutely nothing.”
They refused to accept that. But I was adamant that I knew nothing and had no
information to offer. Yes, I’d given Maleko a lift to the rugby game, but that was only because he wouldn’t take no for an answer. Yes, I had seen a fight break out on the field but I had no clue what it had been about. There, that was it. Frustrated with my lack of gossip enthusiasm, they soon let me be, which was a relief.
When the bell rang for lunch, I was headed towards the canteen when a tall shape detached itself from the crowd of boys beside the rugby field. Maleko. I groaned. No, he was the last person I wanted to see right now. He had a black eye and a cut lip – they screamed at me accusingly. If that’s what he looked like, I didn’t want to see Daniel.
“Hi Leila! How was class?”
“Good.”
I kept walking but he persistently kept pace with me. “So about yesterday …”
I interrupted him. “Yes, about yesterday. What the hell was that Maleko? I mean, what were you thinking? I’ve been here for months now, and we’re friends. What was that yesterday?”
He seemed startled by my outburst. Now that I had allowed myself to get angry, I could feel the slow burning wave of heat building inside me, and I knew I needed to calm down. Before it got out of control. I needed to get away from this jerk. Fast. “Look just forget it okay, I don’t know what that was about yesterday, and I don’t want to know. You’re a funny guy, and lots of fun to have around, but I’m not interested in going out with you. Not the slightest little bit. So stay away from me with all your touchy-feeliness, you hear me?”
I stalked away before he could reply. Before the fire could sweep up and outwards, overwhelming my control. I walked into the sunlit courtyard, breathing deeply the way Nafanua had trained me. Not fleeing from the heat that spoke to me, but gentling it. Breathe. Assure it, all is well. You are not needed right now. Sleep, slumber on. It was my first real test at self-control since I had been back at school, and I was pleased with the results. Another deep breath and the fire simmered and died.
My buzz faded when I saw Daniel at the far end of the driveway. With Mele walking beside him. I couldn’t see his face so I didn’t know what damage Maleko had inflicted on him. I hoped fervently that there would be none. Too ashamed to see for myself, to see the hate that must be burning in him, I turned back and slipped upstairs. It would be another lunch period spent in the library. Oh well, I was so far behind that I needed all the study time I could get.
After lunch, we moved to house practice. Again we gathered under the spreading tamaligi and again, we went through the songs first. A few of the words were starting to be familiar to me and the actions were no longer foreign. There was a delicious breeze blowing across the field and it was good to be outdoors. I carefully nudged a thought pattern to the ground below us and felt an answering warmth in return. All was well. It was time for the girls’ dance. This time I joined them, Simone making room for me at the end of the front row. The music started and the first movements caught me and swept me along with them. I didn’t know all the routine, but it didn’t matter, the music caught my hands, my breath, my body – and everything that was me danced to its call. I thought I would be nervous, hesitant. But there was nothing but joy. In the music and in the answer that my hands danced. Everything else faded away. The heat of the afternoon. The sweaty crowd of students gathered underneath a wilting tree. Even all thoughts of Daniel and Mele. Nothing else existed but the music and the dance as my hands spoke to its call. When the song ended, I was flushed with happiness but embarrassed with the silence. People were looking at me funny as I went back to sit beside Simone. He turned sardonical eyes on me.
“So what the hell was THAT !?” He prodded my shoulder with one lithe finger, his liquid-lined eyes demanding an explanation.
I couldn’t stop the laugh. “What? I was dancing, you know, doing the siva like everybody else up there.”
He shook his head firmly. “No, you weren’t like everyone else up there and you know it, you self-satisfied evil thing. Stop gloating! It doesn’t make sense. Yesterday you can’t dance a beat and today you’re all of a sudden Miss-Samoa-graceful and a dance diva? What’s going on?”
I hastened to chase away the suspicion in his eyes. “Okay, okay, I confess, my mom gave me some lessons. I told her I was sick and tired of being the odd one out during practice, the brown palagi girl who couldn’t siva and so she helped me out.” Sudden anxiety gripped me. “Was I okay? Did it look alright?”
Simone waved his hand airily. “Girl, you were more than alright. You were freakin fantastic. I’m jealous. I’m supposed to be the only feminine graceful one in this relationship!” He scowled, and then a cheeky grin lit up his face. “Ohmigosh you should have seen Mele’s face when she realized Daniel was staring at you the whole time. It was wicked!” A huge sigh of pleasure. “If looks could kill you would have been riddled with holes by now. I don’t know how your mom did it, but she sure turned you into a taupou.”
I tried to hide how pleased I was to hear that Daniel had been studying me as I watched the boys do their slap dance, memorizing all over again the way sunlight danced on Daniel’s shoulders, over the perfect symmetry of his chest. Unfortunately, the slap dance was over far too soon and the boys returned to their section in the shade. Someone handed Daniel his guitar for the solo, and I was so focused on waiting to hear his singing again that I missed it when the lead teacher, Mrs. Lematua, called my name. Simone poked me in the ribs and hissed. “Leila, she wants you.”
I was dumb with surprise. “Huh?”
Mrs. Lematua sighed with sweaty frustration. “Leila Folger I said, can you get up here please!”
Slowly, I got up and walked to the front, unsure what I was being disciplined about. “Umm … yes?”
“We want you to do the siva while Daniel sings his song. We’re trying out different girls for the taupou this year. Go on, it’s hot and we don’t have all day.”
Heat choked me as understanding sunk in. She wanted me to dance. All by myself. In front of everyone. In front of Daniel. I felt nauseous. This was not what I had planned. Yes, I wanted to know how to siva and yes I wanted to NOT look like an idiot up there, but I didn’t want to be humiliated like this in front of the school. And especially not in front of a lethally glaring Mele, a gleefully leering Simone, and especially not in front of a boy I was in love with. I tried to squirm out of it.
“Mrs. Lematua, I don’t think that’s a good idea, I mean, I’m new to this siva stuff and I really think someone else would be much better for this. I …”
Mrs. Lematua silenced me with one upraised hand. “Miss Folger, I know you’re relatively new here but I’m surprised that you haven’t learned already that when a teacher tells you to do something, you do it. Without arguing. We want to try different girls out for the taupou and it’s your turn. So get up there.” Without waiting for a reply, she turned to Daniel. “Daniel, the song please.”
I was terrified, and, in my terror, I turned to the one thing that could give me strength. Pele. As the first strains of Daniel’s song began to lilt through the air, I shut my eyes and felt for that now-familiar heat. In the ground beneath my bare feet. I called her softly. Gently. Asking for help. I thought of fire. The way it danced. Sparkled. The way it moved me. I let the song in Daniel’s voice dance over me, let it tug gently at my hands, my feet. I felt a sweet warmth that did not come from the blazing sun but from the earth below and I welcomed it, allowed it to take over ever so slightly. It was deliciously dangerous. Playing with fire. Communing with Pele without allowing her to make me explode into flames. I let her power inspire and move my hands, my body, my entire dance was hers.
There was silence when the music ended. I bowed the way Nafanua had showed me and walked slowly back to the shade. I could feel Daniel’s eyes on me as I found my way back to Simone.
Mrs. Lematua seemed disconcerted. “Okay, thank you Leila, thank you. Umm, well that’s it for practice today people. We’ll see you all back here tomorrow. Leila and Daniel can you stay behind for a moment please?”
Simo
ne dug his fingers into my ribs, startling me. “Ha! See, you rocked, ohmigosh, I bet they’re going to tell you that you’re the taupou and Mele is going to absolutely KILL you!” Laughter gleamed in his eyes, wicked and delighted. I pushed him away.
Telesa - The Covenant Keeper Page 34