by Paula Cox
She starts to cry. “He’s going to kill me! He’s going to kill me!”
I walk towards her, kneel down, and grab hold of her shoulders. “He won’t touch a hair on your head. You hear me? I promise you that, Aimee. Nothing—nobody—is going to hurt you as long as you’re with me.”
I mean every single word.
Chapter Eleven
Aimee
“I was—I was—” My voice trembles. I know he’s going to rage at me, but even being ready for it doesn’t make his explosion any easier when it hits.
The voice is merciless, unforgiving. “Don’t even bother explaining it to me! You had one fucking job, bitch, and you couldn’t get it done! Even worse, you got us on the police’s radar. Do you know what kind of money that takes to get off it?”
“I’m… I’m sorry. I was just—” I stumble through my thoughts one by one, unsure of how to go on. I don’t have an explanation for what happened back at the mall with Breaker. All I know is that, for the first time in my life, I screwed up and got caught.
Biggs shouts me down, completely unaware of the people staring him down. “Shut up! I don’t want to hear another fucking word out of that whore mouth of yours again!” He points to Breaker who stands at my side, seething. “You! You gave this chick free reign, and she walked all over you. I told you to not let that happen. You had one damn job!”
Breaker takes a step closer to him, pushing his chest into Biggs. I back up on instinctive as it escalates to Breaker screaming over his leader. “Leave her the hell alone! She didn’t do a damn thing wrong here. She did exactly what you wanted and walked away with enough cash to pay for your mistake!”
“My mistake? You think this is my fucking mistake? You think being stuck in New Mexico is my problem? Fuck you, kid.” With nowhere to go, Biggs pushes himself out of the way of Breaker and walks back towards the crowd of men dressed all in black. They duck their heads and pretend not to have heard the fight between the two.
With arms outstretched, Biggs draws the group to him. The men all share the same look—somber and worn. Even the biggest and baddest of them appear to have been broken down by the funeral for the two fallen men. The widow and family members still sit inside the hall, waiting for the motorcycle escort to the desert where their ashes will be spread. But Biggs doesn’t seem to care about that. He’s got current events on his mind and no care for the dead.
Loud enough for everyone to hear him, he calls out, “I’ve got some shit to say, and I want to say it now.” Reaching behind me, he manages to yank my arm so that I fly forward. I wrap an arm around my body, turning away towards the Gravediggers’ steel-like glares. “You all were under the impression that this girl, Aimee, was an acting member of this club. After yesterday’s events, I’m revoking that privilege.”
“What?” I ask, my breath lost in my chest. Without club member status, I was just another girl passing through. I wouldn’t be protected, fed, or housed. I would have to make do with whatever scraps they gave me when they were allowed to give it to me. And Biggs could decide my fate as he could the first day I wandered into his club headquarters.
I look over at Breaker. He looks just as distraught as I do. He grabs hold of Biggs’ shoulder and spins him towards him. “What about my claim on her? She’s an old lady of this club and gets that title until I let go of her,” he says in a low whisper.
“No,” Biggs spits with venom. Turning back to the club, he clarifies, “No Gravedigger has claims on Aimee, including Breaker. He lost that right when he let her botch up a robbery job and put us all in the position we’re in today. If anyone’s to blame, it’s him.”
Henry comes out of nowhere, one hand raised in frustration. “You can’t fucking be serious!” he bellows. “This is against every rule in our bylaws!”
“My rule is law, judge, jury, fucking gospel here!” Biggs shouts back. “If any of you little bitches wanna challenge me, they can take off that patch and send me to the ring. But I won’t take this bullshit anymore. We do this my way, or no way at all.”
I look back at the rest of the Gravediggers. They suddenly transform from men I was getting to know just enough to feel somewhat secure around them to a pack of wolves all licking their lips at their next, juicy meal. Even those I can sense are loyal to Henry and Breaker seem to be looking towards Biggs with reverence in his decisions. Have we crossed the line? Where was it to begin with?
With a wave of his hands, Biggs dismisses the group. All of the men head off towards their bikes, Breaker in the back end position and Biggs leading the club. I stand motionless as Marco’s widow passes by with his ashes. She holds the jar tightly to her chest, her arms wrapped protectively around the curves of it. With tender pecks, she kisses the lid before handing the ashes over to Biggs who places it in his saddlebag.
Gringo’s family follows behind her. They look more upset and bewildered than anything. Unlike Marco’s widow who travels with the club, Gringo’s family clearly had no idea what their son was involved with. From what I have heard from Breaker, Biggs had to pay for their flight from California to New Mexico, and when they resisted a club funeral, Biggs had to insist that this is what happens. No doctor, no morgue, no church with flowers. Just a funeral home worker paid off to perform the cremation and a tradition dating back to when the club was first founded.
Gringo’s family gives the ashes to Breaker, who holds them in his arms. He hangs his head low, placing his chin on his chest. Breaker, unlike Biggs, was the kind of guy who knew details about their lives, who had real brotherhoods with the majority of them. He took the club oath seriously in every sense.
He takes off slowly behind the second-to-last driver, looking over his shoulder to be sure the families are keeping up in their rented black cars. The line of motorcycles disappears towards the blank landscape where the sun has just begun to set. For the first time, I’m alone, save for a few members who have stayed behind to guard the club’s assets.
I take a seat on a bench inside the funeral home. The entire place smells like a mixture of heavy cleaning solution and dust. It reminds me of my Grandma’s home back on the island where every bit of furniture and decor felt as if it was nearly twenty years behind the times. With nothing to do, I play with the hem of my borrowed dress mindlessly, trying not to think about what would happen to me when those men get back.
Would Breaker still want me, and protect me? I’m not sure why that question is the first thing I am thinking about when I’ve got bigger fish to fry, but it is. I am suddenly terrified of nights without him, of other men trying to come between us. I am worried about where I will sleep if it is not with him or who will be my get-away backup partner if Biggs sends me out on another run.
“Ma’am?” A pale man dressed in a worn black suit taps my shoulder. “Would you like anything while you wait? There are some complimentary refreshments and finger foods in the lounge if—”
I cut him off without a second thought. “A phone,” I say, sounding a little absentminded. By the way the man’s looking at me, with such care and practiced compassion, I’m able to guess that he’s implying I’m a family member left behind to wait. I have to use this to my advantage. “I’m sorry,” I add. “Can I borrow your phone for a quick call? I just need to check on some things back home, and I’m not sure when I’ll be back at the hotel to do it.”
“Yes, certainly. Right this way. You can use my private office.” He stretches out his long, wispy arms and shows me towards a closed off room at the front of the building. There’s a red leather chair behind a large desk in the middle of the room, but I don’t dare to sit down. Instead, I just walk forward and reach for the simple, white telephone on the desk. The man shuts the door behind him, leaving me alone.
What feels like days pass as I try to dial my sister’s number again. After I couldn’t reach her the first night, I had done away with the idea that she could or even wanted to save me this time. Still, having the phone in front of me feels like there is still hope ou
t there if I could just find the right moment. I stare at the numbers, willing myself to push them, but I can’t. I just can’t. The room grows dark with the sun shifting away from the west-facing window.
“Aimee?” Breaker knocks on the door to the office. “We need to go.” He pushes it open, and I quickly place the phone down. I shouldn’t care if he thinks I’ve been calling for help or not, but still, I try to hide it.
“Yeah,” I say as I walk out, knowing that I’ve missed my opportunity. I instantly regret not placing that call as soon as I am out the door and back on Breaker’s motorcycle.
We ride alone and in silence towards the hotel.
When we park, Breaker answers what is clearly on my mind. “You’re going to sleep with me. Biggs wants you to fend for yourself, but I’m not going to let that happen.”
“You don’t have to do this,” I say, “You don’t have to protect me. I’ve been watching out for myself since I was a teenager. I’ve been fine.” My pride sticks to me like armor. Even now I can’t seem to let this guy in.
I dismount without waiting for him, heading straight towards the rooms without thinking. I’m about fifty feet ahead of him when I feel a hand on my arm. Someone grabs me, pushing me towards the wall. The smell of stale booze and smoke burns my nostrils.
“Well, look who I caught! Aimee, Aimee, Aimee… It’s so good to see you. After this afternoon, I could use some new pussy in my life to lighten me up.”
A man I can’t name whips me around to face him, pressing my arms together so I can’t strike out at him. He leans his head into my neck, pressing his nose into the flesh of it. His voice slithers up my skin while his hands trace up and under the bottom of my dress. I feel his scratchy fingers with the dangling nails meet the top of my thighs while he coos into my ear, “Jesus, a body like this… I know why Breaker was keeping you all to himself. When I get through with you, you won’t smell or look so sweet.”
He laughs, his body shaking into mine, before pushing me forward towards his room’s open door. I tumble backward, falling to the ground. My head bounces off of the spongy carpet, forcing me to finally let out that scream that’s been hidden in my stomach. “HELP! PLEASE! SOMEONE! HELP ME!”
I barely get out the last line before the man swings back, out of my view. There’s a loud pound, a body slamming against a wall, before I hear Breaker shouting with such force, it takes me a moment to realize it’s him. “Get the hell off of her, Price!”
I sit myself up on my elbows, pulling the hem of my dress down to watch him pummel into the man.
“Hey! Hey! Hey! What the fuck, man? She’s free game. We all heard Biggs say it. I can do whatever I want to her,” Price shouts back.
Breaker leans over him, right in his face. “No! I don’t care what the hell Biggs says. She’s mine, and she’s staying mine. Pass it onto your dickless friends that Aimee isn’t to be touched unless they want to deal with me.”
Standing under the overhead light, a halo of fluorescent covers the black waves of his hair. His entire face lightens up as he reaches his long arm out to me. Carefully, I hold on as he picks me up, cradling me upright in his arms. Some part of me knows this is a fairy tale. My knight in shining armor has shown up to save me, but I can’t get past the darkness that falls behind his eyes. Even with him holding me, there’s something there that warns, Don’t go on! Wolf in sheep’s clothing!
So I pull away. I thank him, muttering it under my breath, and then I walk through the door back towards where I remember my room is. He runs to my side as I stop, frozen in my place. My bag is outside my door; it has been torn open, and items are clearly missing. I pull my purse closer to my hip, bite my lip, and march over to it. I dig through the pockets, tearing through the clothes and the torn up notepad, until I find the pictures. They’re still where I left them, untouched. Thank God.
“Come on. Let’s go back to my room.” Breaker places his hand on my arm and pulls me to my feet again. I put more weight on him until we finally get into the room and he places me on the bed. I slump backward, staring up, wordless, at the ceiling.
A moment passes, and I feel a tug at one of my thigh-high leather boots. The zipper slides off, scraping my skin. I pull myself up slightly to see Breaker at my feet, turning my other leg so that he can get to the second boot zipper. It slips off easier this time with him pulling it off slower and with care. His large hands plant themselves at my hips so that he hovers just over my chest. I feel his hips press into my knees and then a hand slipping up my dress towards my fishnet leggings. The fingers pull at the thin fabric until it slips over my hips and down towards my panties.
Breaker must have heard my gasp or felt my body tense under his touch, for he stops and lowers his face towards mine. I peer back at his large mass as he whispers, “I’m not going to do anything to you that you don’t want. I’m just helping you get comfortable. You shouldn’t sleep with your boots on.”
I have a choice to make here. I know I do. I could tell him to stop, turn my back to him, and pretend that he hasn’t been anything but kind to me today and this evening. Or I could let him pull these leggings down and throw them wherever my boots have landed. I take a deep breath, searching for that gut feeling, but all I’m getting is how nice his hands feel resting on the bone of my hip and how tantalizing and hot his breath is on my cheeks.
Reaching up, I grab his face in my hands and pull him down so that his entire weight falls on me. My lips part for him, leading him to me so that our mouths blend together in a passionate fury.
With a gentle touch, he moves his hands along the line of my body, starting at my neck and traveling slower towards the roundness of my ass. When he gets to my thighs, he hitches his hand around the fleshiest part and throws my leg around his muscular hip. The scratchy fabric of his jeans rubs against the bare skin, but I don’t mind. The pain is good. The pain makes this real for me.
His breathing picks up along with his motions. He becomes wild, kissing me with such intensity that it feels as if he will force me to jump out of my own body. I hold on for the ride by letting him take control of me. My body melts in his hands as they come back to my breasts. The halter straps of my borrowed black dress peel away, untying themselves by his force, and the neckline falls so that my chest is laid out bare for him.
Breaker stops for a moment. His dark eyes fall on my nipples as a wicked smile draws across his face. “Damn, you are fucking beautiful.”
I don’t quite know why, but I let out a laugh. It’s a burst of giggle that makes me feel as if I’m in the third grade again and some cute boy has complimented my shoes. Of course, Breaker looks back at me as if I’m crazy, but that doesn’t stop him from going in, head first.
Those thick lips plaster themselves around my firm left nipple; the soft vibrations of his low growl pulsing against my skin. The tiny hairs on my body stand on end as he tugs and sucks, alternating the firm motions in such rapid succession that I can barely keep up. Then there’s the sting! His fingers twist around the other nipple, pinching it alert. I cry out, my voice not my own.
My hips rise against his as if lifted by a string, and his growing cock against my pubic bone only sets me more aflame. Something else takes control of me as I push his shoulders and head down as hard as I can. He goes from my breasts to my hips and out from under the skirt of my dress still hitched at my waist.
Breaker kisses the outside of my black panties. Despite the fabric being in the way, I feel his hot breath seep through and the tenderness of his lips. Down there, the skin grows warm as everything opens up in anticipation. My fingers wrap around the waves of his hair as I wait for him to curl the elastic lace of my panties around his hands.
Again, he dives in like an expert. After fucking me several times, he has managed to learn all of my nooks and soft spots. Breaker finds my clit with just a little flick of his tongue, focusing on my pleasure spot with unmatched intensity. His hands massage at the folds in a circular motion so that they open and close for him. It’
s just enough for him to slip his finger along the inside edges, rotating it in the opposite direction of his mouth. The sensation reels me, both holding me in place on the bed and sending my insides flying in every direction.
All I can do is grasp hold of the bedding while he digs in. Breaker speeds up the motions of his mouth and fingers while pushing me back down when my hips seem to get out of control. At one point, I feel his fingers curl into the round, curve of my ass. His mouth suddenly stops, but I can’t focus on that. I instead feel the thick, heavy whack against my skin.
I’ve never been one for spanking, but this isn’t the same as getting punished. This was earthy, wild, unhinged. I want more.
“Breaker! Please!”
He slaps my ass again; this time so hard I hear the crack of skin meeting skin. His mouth continues to work on my pussy. The sting and the wetness blend into delicious torment.
There’s another.
And another.
My passion flies off the charts. I’m only vaguely conscious as I feel my own hands wrap around my breasts as if I can’t hold myself in my skin anymore. All I can see is his brown eyes staring up at me as he drives that finger further into me.