Her mother stood at the kitchen bench, preparing what I assumed was going to be dinner. The house smelled as if she had been cooking for some time, the delicious aroma of roast meat floating through the air. My mouth watered at the scent. I was in for a treat.
“Rowan,” the woman said warmly, turning towards us.
“Hi, Mum,” Rowan said, releasing my hand to hug her.
“I put a leg of lamb in to roast for dinner, just getting everything else ready to put on when the time comes. Go and take a seat, and I’ll bring you all a cup of coffee and a biscuit.”
She smiled at me, leaning forward to kiss my cheek.
“You must be Kyle. We’ve heard all about you.”
I shot a glance at Rowan, who blushed and looked at the floor. “Have you now?”
“It’s all good,” her mother said, patting my hand.
Rowan led me back through to the living room where her father was already waiting, leaned back in his recliner chair.
“How was the drive down?” her father asked.
She shrugged. “I slept for half of it. Pretty quiet, as far as I know.”
“There wasn’t a lot of traffic on the road,” I said, nodding.
“I’ll help you unpack the car after we’ve had coffee and something to eat,” he said, looking at me.
“That’d be great. I only have one bag. The car is full of Rowan’s stuff anyway.”
He roared with laughter. “You’re a good man to let her have that much space in your car. Must be a keeper.”
I laughed, before looking across at Rowan. She was gaping at her father, and I wondered more than ever what she’d told them about me.
“Seriously, I know you’ve been a good friend to her, and after that Andrew and Charlie debacle, it’s been good to hear that she’s happy,” he said.
“Dad,” she muttered through gritted teeth.
“Sorry, pumpkin. You know me; never could keep my mouth shut.” He winked, and that sealed the deal for me. He and I were going to get along famously. In fact, I could already tell this was the right place for me to be. I belonged.
CHAPTER FIFTEEN
Rowan
Mortified at Dad, I wanted to crawl into a hole and hide. All my feelings for Kyle had pushed me to confiding in him and Mum about how I felt, and Dad kept hinting at it while we were talking.
After coffee, he disappeared outside with Kyle, and I watched from the window as they went to the car and began to unpack everything. My stomach churned at what he could be saying, but in no position to stop the conversation, all I could do was wait for them to come back in.
“Are you okay, Rowan?” Mum asked, as she began clearing away the coffee cups.
“I’m fine,” I murmured, trying to get a better look as the two of them started laughing, my father patting Kyle on the back.
“He seems nice,” she said, moving behind me.
I sighed. “He is, but you guys don’t need to be so vocal about us.”
She hugged me from behind. “Your father just wants to make sure he is all you say he is. He loves you, sweetheart.”
“I know. Some things are just better left quiet, you know?”
“Don’t tell your father next time.” She laughed, going back to take the dishes to the kitchen.
I rolled my eyes, following her through to the kitchen. I opened the oven door to look at the roast lamb, breathing in its amazing smell. It wasn’t worth doing something like this just for me at home, but maybe for myself and Kyle …
“Close that door before you let all the heat out,” Mum said.
“Sorry. It just smells so good.” I turned and hugged her. “I’m glad to be here.”
“What about tomorrow?”
I smiled. “What’s done is done. They’re together and happy. I’ve been spending time with Charlie, working through her wedding preparation. It’s been nice to be with her again.”
Mum nodded. “It was always a shame she couldn’t spend more time here with you and Andrew. She’s such a nice girl. I’m looking forward to seeing her tomorrow.”
“She’ll be beautiful, Mum.”
She cupped my face, pressing her nose to mine. “You are beautiful, Rowan. Maybe that man of yours will make you finally see that.”
Falling footsteps told us Dad and Kyle were back. Dad was telling Kyle just to leave my things in the hallway so I could sort them.
“They’re getting on well,” Mum said, “I know your father was worried you were setting yourself up for another fall. I don’t think so, though.”
I shrugged. “Kyle’s a great friend, Mum. I don’t know what I’d do without him now.”
Going out to the hallway, I started sorting through my things, carrying my bag up to my room and unpacking. I went back down to find my Dad deep in conversation with Kyle in the living room. Dad was in his element, telling stories of the orchard, and I watched as they went off again on a tour round the orchard, leaving me behind.
It didn’t matter, though. I smiled as I watched my two favourite men becoming friends.
~
After dinner, we all sat around and watched a movie. Dad and Kyle acted like old friends, and I realised Andrew had never been as comfortable as Kyle was in our house. He’d been stiff and awkward around my father, where Kyle was at ease. If our friendship ever died, I think my father would end up as devastated as I would.
I didn’t realise I was staring at Kyle until he waved his hand in front of my face, waking me out of the dream I’d fallen into. The one where he loved me back; the one that I hadn’t dared dream before.
“Earth to Rowan. You okay?” he asked.
“I’m fine. Probably just time for me to get some sleep. Tomorrow is a really big day.”
He reached for my hand, squeezing it and smiling. “Good thinking.”
I stood, moving to Dad to give him a kiss goodnight. Mum was already in bed, asleep, and I smiled at Kyle as I went to leave.
“You’re all good in the spare room? Know where everything is?” I asked.
“Don’t worry about me. I’ll be fine. Have a good sleep, and I’ll see you in the morning.”
I nodded. “Goodnight.”
Climbing the stairs, I paused halfway up to look at a photo on the wall. Charlie, Andrew and I had been in our first year of high school, children verging on the edge of being adults, but we looked so carefree and happy. We’d been at Andrew’s parents’ beach house, and I remembered the holiday well, as Charlie had left early after becoming ill. Andrew and I spent half the summer together, left to our own devices for the most part, and that was the summer I was more sure than ever he would be mine.
It might have been the kiss we shared while sitting under a tree, just far away enough from the house that no one would see. I shook as his hand slid down from my shoulder and touched my breast. As I gasped, he pulled his hand away, grinning at me. “Sorry, Row.”
I hit his arm. “You’re not sorry.”
He laughed, hugging me. My stomach was awhirl with nerves, but he pulled away, grabbing at my hand to pull me towards the house. “Let’s go get a drink.”
All the teasing, all the flirting, none of it meant anything in the end. It didn’t really matter anymore.
I kept going on to my room. Nothing had changed; all my childhood things were around the room. The narrow single bed in the corner made me ache for my queen-sized bed in my apartment. The bookcase was full of books that were tattered and falling apart, a result of rereading all my favourites over and over again.
Changing into my nightgown, I climbed into bed, and turned off the light. Tomorrow was going to be interesting.
~
The smell of pancakes wafted through the house as I went down the stairs towards the kitchen. Mum’s Saturday speciality. Kyle sat at the table, stuffing himself with food as Mum made another batch.
“Your mother’s a really good cook. We can’t stay here; I’ll get fat,” he mumbled through his mouthful.
I laughed. “Why
do you think I left home?” I kissed Mum good morning, and sat at the table.
The rest of the morning was pretty uneventful as we sat around and waited. No point in getting ready too early, with the wedding being mid-afternoon. Dad was out on the orchard as usual, and Mum fretted that he’d never be ready in time, but I knew he’d be in and dressed before the rest of us. He always was.
After lunch, I went upstairs. Kyle had disappeared, and I assumed he was with Dad. I took my dress out of the wardrobe where it hung. Charlie had helped me choose it, from all those damn wedding magazines. We’d grown so close again poring over them, finding the perfect bridesmaids’ dresses. They were beautiful, and I’d pictured myself wearing one. I couldn’t help it.
“My sisters will look great in these, don’t you think?” she’d said.
“I guess.” Despite not anticipating anything, I felt a twinge of disappointment. She didn’t want me.
“Now we get to find a dress that you’ll look good in. Are you coming with your parents?”
That was it. And I was almost ashamed that I’d gone to bed and cried when she’d gone. She hadn’t even thought of me in that way.
It was finally time to get ready. I stripped off to get changed. As I pulled off my T-shirt, it stuck on one of my earrings and I sighed as I fiddled with the fitting rather than having it rip my ear apart.
There was a tap on the door, and before I could react, I heard his voice.
“Rowan, I just wanted to see if you needed anything before we …” He stopped as he saw me, standing topless beside the bed.
I pulled my earring free, covering myself up with the T-shirt. Kyle turned his back.
“I am so, so sorry. I never would have come in if I thought you were changing.”
“What did you think I was doing? Stay there while I get my dress on.” I turned my back to him, letting go of the shirt to pick up the dress.
The blue chiffon floated down me as I pulled it on over my head. The fabric was soft and sensual against my skin and I revelled in the feeling before remembering Kyle was still in the room.
“You can turn around now.”
He turned, and looked at me with the most intense look I’d ever seen from him. His eyes were bewildered, his breathing heavy. Maybe it was because he’d just seen me half naked; I don’t know.
“Kyle? Are you okay?”
“You … you look beautiful, Rowan.”
I blushed. “Thank you.”
He grinned, shaking his head as if he’d just woken up. “You’ll be the most beautiful bridesmaid there. I think you’ll outshine the bride.”
I could feel the colour draining from my face. “I’m not a bridesmaid. Where did you get that idea? I wouldn’t be here if that was the case.”
“Oh. I’m sorry, I just didn’t think that out.” Now he looked as though he’d been slapped. “I just assumed because you’d been spending all that time planning things with Charlie … She’s your friend, isn’t she?”
“She has sisters.” I choked back the tears as I said the words, not wanting to tell him I’d cried buckets of tears at the feeling of rejection.
A flash of anger crossed his face. “Her loss. I still get to escort the prettiest girl at the wedding.”
“Charlie’s gorgeous. No one is going to outshine her.”
He crossed the room to take my hands in his. “I wouldn’t be so sure of that.”
My heart was beating fast as he looked into my eyes. He was such a good friend to me, and here I was getting tangled in the Charlie Andrew mess again. This was who I could trust now, and I felt it more than ever.
“Rowan,” Mum called out from the hallway. “Do you need anything in there?”
“I’m fine, Mum,” I called back.
Kyle squeezed my hands. “I have to go and get ready. See you soon, gorgeous girl.”
My heart pounded at about a million beats per minute. He winked at me as he went through the door. I sat on the bed, staring at the door.
Whether he realised it or not, I was his.
CHAPTER SIXTEEN
Kyle
The car ride to the wedding was silent, and I just knew Rowan was thinking about the afternoon to come. It hurt that this was breaking her heart, and I couldn’t do anything about it.
What I’d seen in her room kept coming back to me. She was so beautiful, and I’d caught a glimpse of her as she’d stripped off. Seeing her made me ache to hold her in my arms and tell her how I really felt. But we had this day to get through first.
She had to see this wedding, had to see Charlie and Andrew exchange vows. Maybe then she would let go of that dream she’d had of him. All I could do was hope that happened. Until she let go, I had no hope of her seeing me as anything other than a friend.
I wanted to drive in the opposite direction, take her away from all of this, but I couldn’t. I had to let this play out, no matter how much it hurt, but after this day I would not let them hurt her anymore. As far I was concerned, those two were done, and I would move heaven and earth to keep them away from her. Once today was over, that was it.
I glanced at her. She looked straight ahead, and I knew she was only just holding it together. I’d put my foot in it, assuming that Charlie had had the decency to include her best friend in the wedding party. Instead, Rowan had been left out. At least she had me.
We pulled up into the church car park, and I held her hand as we approached the building. She shook as we grew closer, holding tight as we sat in the church well behind the rows of family. There were curious looks—everyone must have known how close the three of them had been over the years—but she ignored them, staring straight ahead.
Andrew smiled and waved at her, and I wanted to get up and punch him in the face. He must have known what this was doing to her; he and Charlie supposedly knew her better than anyone. I hurt for Rowan.
I slid my arm around Rowan’s shoulders, leaning over to kiss the side of her head. “You okay?”
She nodded, turning to face me. There was the tiniest of smiles on her face. Screw the people around us, I was there for her, not them.
I grinned, kissing her on the nose and squeezing her arm to show my support. When I looked up, Andrew was staring daggers at me. I just shook my head, kissing the top of Rowan’s head again. If he wanted the best of both worlds, marrying Charlie and keeping Rowan dangling, I would stand in his way. No one would ever use her again.
Charlie arrived to great fanfare, and I watched as Andrew smiled at his bride.
I gripped Rowan’s arm tight, and she stayed calm through the whole ceremony. While everyone threw rice, and cheered outside, we slipped back to my car.
“Are you okay, sweetheart?”
She nodded. “I can’t not be okay, if that makes sense. What’s done is done.”
How on earth could I tell her I wanted to skip the reception? I wanted to take her home to her bed and find every freckle, explore every last inch of her body, make her scream my name. She only thought of me as a friend who was helping her through this tough situation, and all I could think about was how it would feel sinking into her, making her mine.
Instead, I drove her where she needed to be and sat with her, back from the head table. The whole situation pissed me off more and more by the minute. I got that the day wasn’t about her, but I thought they could have done more for the woman they had both been best friends with since childhood.
She just looked straight ahead again, through the speeches and ate her meal without a word.
When the music started, she watched Andrew and Charlie dance, with a wistful look on her face. Her dream was over, but I wasn’t finished trying to make something of the evening.
“Hey, beautiful. Want to take the next dance?” I said, leaning over to whisper in her ear.
She leaned towards me, nodding slightly.
As other couples took to the dance floor, I took her hand, pulling her to her feet. She looked so flat. “How about I show you what an amazing dancer I am?”
/>
“Amazing, huh?” Finally a real smile broke through and she laughed, shaking her head.
“Only the best.”
Her eyes lit up as I pulled her to the dance floor and into my arms, and we laughed together as we began to move. “Thank you for putting up with me today.”
“That’s what I’m here for Rowan. I’m certainly not here for them.”
She sighed. “I know. You’ve been so good to me, and I must drive you nuts with the way I’ve been going on.”
I shook my head. “This is a big deal for you. As long as you know that I’m here for you no matter what.”
Rowan pulled me closer. I could smell her perfume, delicate, as she was. I didn’t know if she could feel how hard I was getting, but I no longer cared. I loved this girl so freaking much, and soon I’d tell the world about it.
The hairs on my neck were standing on end, and I looked up to see Andrew staring at us. Well, looking at me with that pissed off look he’d had on his face before. What his problem was, I didn’t know. It wasn’t like he had feelings for Rowan, right?
After a couple of dances, I excused myself to go to the bathroom. If I didn’t get rid of this hard-on, it could prove to be embarrassing. I closed my eyes in the bathroom cubicle, trying to get it over with as quickly as I could, the memory of seeing Rowan half naked spurring me on. What I wouldn’t give to have her with me, her mouth on me.
Relieved of my burden, I left the bathroom, ready for round two. I had no idea how I would cope with the rest of the night.
Andrew was waiting for me outside.
“What the hell are you doing?” he asked.
I raised an eyebrow. Surely he didn’t know what I’d just been up to. “What are you talking about?”
“Rowan is off limits. She doesn’t need anyone like you around to use her and make her feel like crap.”
Loving Rowan Page 6