Amari’s phone rang just as he entered the highway. A quick glance at the caller ID showed him that it was his best friend and agent, Dan.
“What’s up?” Amari asked.
“Have you ever considered taking acting classes?”
“What?”
“Well, I’m just talking to a few casting agents. I know you did some acting in high school and college so I was looking at some cameo appearances…”
“I don’t know, man. Maybe. I went to that center I told you about.”
“Oh. I thought we should wait on that and get you in some high-profile charities that can get you on TV and…”
“We can do that, too. I like this one,” Amari insisted. “It just seems more like what God wants me to do.”
There was silence on the other side. Amari knew that Dan was very uncomfortable whenever he mentioned God, Christianity and Jesus.
He had been there. He totally understood.
“I’ll go to church, Ma, but I don’t really believe all that stuff,” Amari had told his mother when he was entering high school. By the time he was sixteen he was using work and basketball as an excuse not to attend church. He didn’t want to hear all the rules that were so hard to follow.
Don’t do this. Don’t drink. Don’t smoke. Don’t sleep around. Don’t watch this. Man, there were too many rules. And some of the people who went to his ma’s Baptist church were the ones who were sleeping around and doing all that stuff. He didn’t want to be a part of that hypocrisy. His ma, Gloria Crystal Thomas, had continued to go to church alone, waking up early to catch the eight o’clock service so she could make it to work by three.
Amari didn’t see it improving their lives. They were still poor. His ma had to work at a phone company during the week and in a nursing home during the weekends just to keep them in their tiny house. Just to keep Amari in the best basketball shoes, taking him to basketball camp and providing tutors even when he didn’t need them. Yep, his ma had worked hard just for him. So he knew where Dan was coming from. He’d been there, knowing what God had done for him but still refusing to truly accept him.
“Can’t argue with God.” Dan’s voice was laced with humor that Amari didn’t miss. “So what’s the center like?”
“Small. The lady I spoke to wasn’t all that friendly.”
“A lady not friendly to Amari Thomas. That’s a first.”
“One of those men haters, I think. I didn’t do anything to her but she acted as if I ran over her dog or something.”
“Could be a sign that you shouldn’t get involved with them.”
“Nah. I won’t let her nasty attitude deter me.”
“Is she hot?”
Amari didn’t answer as he pictured Raven, bringing to mind her rich-hued coffee skin and big, brown eyes. He wouldn’t call her hot. Kendra was hot in the usual way. Light skin, straight, dark hair falling below the chin and tight sexy clothes. Raven was not hot, but she was interesting.
“She a’ right,” Amari said. “Just cold. By the way, the center is in the beginning stages and needs a lot of capital. I’m thinking of building a gym for them soon.”
“Slow down, Thomas. This year has only just began and we need to focus on getting endorsements that can make you more money.”
“I know, Dan. But God doesn’t work that way. You give in order to receive.”
“Sounds like a scam to me.”
“Nah. It’s a natural law. The law of reaping and sowing.”
“You gonna preach to me, man?”
“No, just explaining to you what’s what. Ask Oprah Winfrey. That’s why that woman’s rich. She keeps on giving and her money gets to multiplying. Look. I better run. I’ll talk to you later.”
“Yeah. The movie business, man. That’s the next place to go.”
“We’ll talk.” Amari cut the phone and focused on the road. Raven’s unfriendly face came to him, and he blasted his music to wipe it out of his mind.
* * *
After work on the day she met Amari, Raven decided to go to her father’s church for the midweek service. She arrived at Calvary Worship and was once again amazed by the church that her father headed. Calvary Worship had been in existence for over twenty years, though it had started humbly in her father’s living room. She was ten years old when Philip Robert Davies told his family at dinner that God had told him to start a church.
“I don’t know how I’m going to do it, but I know that with God all things are possible,” Philip explained as his wife and four children looked on. He left his job as manager of a car dealership and began the church by faith. There were many challenges along the way, but Philip always knew that he was doing the right thing. Now, twenty years later, he headed one of the biggest churches in the country and had planted another similar church in New York City. Raven knew that her father was becoming an example for many churches to follow in Detroit. He was impacting more than just their church family by encouraging investors and setting meetings with other church leaders to build businesses in Detroit and making a difference in the whole city. He always said, “As long as you are in line with what God wants, then anything is possible.”
* * *
The new building for Calvary had been standing for five years and Raven was always impressed by the beauty of the architecture and the heart of the people who gave their earnings so that they could have that building.
Raven parked her car on the slowly filling parking lot and locked it with a key. She walked into the foyer and was greeted by smiling door greeters who stood by the door over an hour before the mid-week service began. She was once again amazed by the number of people who volunteered their time and talents to work at the church. Doctors, musicians, teachers, accountants. Everybody had a part to play in that glorious church. Raven walked past the bookshop, coffee shop and other offices and finally arrived in her father’s office. Her younger sister, Tahlia, greeted her first.
“Rave!” Tahlia cried, hands reaching out for her sister. Somehow the gesture reminded Raven of Tahlia as a toddler, following Raven everywhere. Raven hugged her sister and looked into the room over her shoulder. When Tahlia stood back, Raven realized she had interrupted an important family meeting. The whole family was there, besides her, of course.
She could see the slight annoyance in her mother’s beautiful face. She glanced at her brother but he smiled happily. Philip Junior, mainly called PJ, was always happy to see her. Esther smiled, too, but the best smile of all was the one her father beamed at her. It was filled with the love and tenderness that she always craved. Right now his warm eyes took away her doubt and insecurities.
“Raven. It’s good to see you. Come and join us,” Philip Senior said. Raven walked towards him and he kissed her cheek. “Sit. Sit.”
“How are you, Raven?” Clare greeted her oldest daughter. Raven smiled at her shyly. If anybody could make her feel like a little girl in the wrong place, her mother could with a look or a question.
“I’m fine.”
“It’s nice of you to drop by your father’s church,” Clare commented, crossing her legs with her pointed gold shoe directed to her. Before Raven could respond to her mother, her brother spoke up in a teasing tone.
“How’s the work in the world?”
“Hectic.”
“We need people like you to be the light in the world, Raven. Those families you work with need you,” Esther said, smiling. Raven smiled at her younger sister gratefully, but she still felt apprehensive.
“Well, we have the Lord’s work to do tonight,” Clare reminded everyone, giving a pointed look to Raven. “It’s the most important work to do. Why you don’t take your place in the family is beyond me.”
“Come on now, Clare. We are not going to talk about Raven’s career choices now. God has a plan and a purpose for her.” Philip spoke to his wife in his gentle voice. Raven’s eyes thanked him, though her heart had dropped to her feet.
The door opened and Esther’s husband Angelo peeked
in.
“The choir is ready for you,” he said. Angelo, a striking five feet, nine inches, was the music leader at Calvary Worship, a dynamic musician and dancer. Everybody stood up and Raven followed suit.
“We are going to have a prayer session together before the service,” Tahlia said. “You should come.”
“It’s fine. I’ll be in the service shortly. I have to go over my case notes before the service anyway.”
“Fine,” Clare said quickly.
“We’ll see you at home for Sunday dinner?” Philip asked his daughter, looking right into her eyes. It was as if he could see through her. He knew she felt uncomfortable whenever she came to the church and her mother was there.
“Of course,” Raven said.
Her family gave her hugs then left her alone in the office. The last one to close the door was PJ, and he winked at her. Raven sat in her father’s chair and looked at the family portrait on his desk. The massive office with a lounging area and connecting kitchen and bathroom were all built for his convenience. Philip spent much time in the building and had been known to spend the night, too.
Raven glanced at her notes but couldn’t concentrate. She decided to go to the service early. She walked to the door, and before she could walk out she couldn’t help overhearing two voices speaking about her family. They were often the subject of gossip and conjecture. She listened, smiling, but her smile soon faded when she made out what they were saying about her.
“I saw the other Davies sister today.”
“The pretty one? Tahlia?”
“Esther and Tahlia are both pretty. The dark ugly duckling, what’s her name. She’s the only one not part of the church.”
“You mean Raven?”
“Yeah. That’s her. She has an unusual name, too.”
“She is different from all the rest. Maybe if she smiled or did something to her hair.”
“Being the oldest and not married, too. Esther’s been married for three years.”
Raven didn’t want to hear any more. She knew how to leave the building without leaving her father’s office and entering the church again. With tears frozen in her eyes she made it out through the kitchen and walked to her car. She didn’t cry. She had stopped crying when she turned sixteen.
Chapter 3
For as long as she could remember adults had gushed over Tahlia and Esther.
“Oh, what pretty brown eyes they have.”
“That one is so dark.”
“She will become prettier when she starts using makeup.”
What was it about skin color that caused people to judge your heart, judge your worthiness? Lately it seemed it was acceptable for men to be dark skinned but not women.
When she was younger, the three sisters used to sing in the service on Sundays. Raven remembered that one day just before the main service she had taken the face powder from her mother’s purse and applied it on her face. She had made it just in time to walk onto the stage and it seemed nobody noticed until people started snickering and pointing. Clare had stared at her from the front of the pews, her mouth wide open. Raven had sung her heart out but at the end of the song the other girls had turned to face her and noticed, their eyes wide with shock.
“Raven Clarissa Davies! What have you done to your face?” Esther had asked.
“Nothing,” eleven-year-old Raven replied as they walked off the stage. Esther reached for her face and ran her finger down her cheek. Raven pushed her hand away.
“You put on makeup?”
“No. I didn’t.”
“Yes you did,” Clare said from the door and walked towards the girls. “What is this? My Estee Lauder?”
“I…”
“Why did you do that? Why would you want to mess up your beautiful skin?” Clare asked, taking the powder from her purse. It was caramel in color to match her skin tone but on Raven it made her look like a ghost, barely covering the dark tones of her skin.
“I just wanted to look pretty, too,” Raven said, wiping the tears on her face and covering her hands with the pale powder.
“Oh, my child, help me. Raven, you are pretty. Who said you had to wear this mess to be pretty?” Clare shouted, holding the powder up.
“Everybody says Tahlia and Esther are pretty, they have pretty eyes, but I have dark skin and dark eyes.”
“Skin color doesn’t make somebody pretty,” Clare cried, looking from Raven’s face to Esther and Tahlia. All her daughters had pretty, full, upturned lips and big eyes, but it was true that there the similarities ended. Raven had high cheekbones and a toned, athletic body, whereas Tahlia and Esther seemed to have inherited her curves and as little girls looked chubby with baby fat. Raven didn’t have that. She was always thin as a reed. And of course they had different skin tones. Did that difference in shade have to make her miserable and feel worthless? She wanted to yell at all the people who made those meaningless statements, though she had grown up with that misguided idea, too.
The sadness in her daughter’s eyes broke her heart.
“You can’t change your skin color, Ray, just like I can’t change mine. When you get older you can get face powders to match your skin, but not to change it, all right?”
Raven had nodded but hadn’t felt any better. And her feelings had not changed. At some point in her darkest moments she wanted to find out how Michael Jackson had lightened his skin. She understood how he must have felt, hating the way he looked, wishing he was someone else.
* * *
Raven arrived at the Philips Center on Saturday. This was the first day Amari was coming to work with the kids. She had not told them he was coming. When he walked in she was working with a ten-year-old boy, Jalen, on multiplication. Jalen was so far behind she was using third-grade materials instead of fifth grade. That was great for her, anyway, because she sucked at math.
She knew when Amari walked in because there was a loud scream from the girls and gasps of excitement from the boys. Raven turned and looked towards the entrance. Amari walked in wearing jeans and a T-shirt, his wavy, short hair cut close to the scalp. No fuss. No earring. Just plain and simple but magnificently gorgeous.
“Amari Thomas!” Jalen called out. Raven sat back and let the excitement wash over the students. There were three volunteers, and Amari would now make a fourth.
“All right, boys and girls,” Raven said, using her authoritative voice. “I’ll give you some time to meet with Amari Thomas and ask some questions, and then he’s going to want to work with some of you on math.” Raven stopped talking and looked at each child in turn. “Now take your seats and let’s go round and say your names.”
Amari sat next to Raven, his tall frame towering over her. She felt very small and unsure next to him. They introduced themselves shyly, but the excitement was still in the air. Raven was sure the students who missed that morning would regret it when their friends told them that Amari Thomas tutored them in math. Amari talked to them about the importance of math and then the students asked him questions. After that it was work. She assigned him two tenth-graders who were failing in math.
While Raven sat with her student she watched Amari explain to the boys, and was amazed at his patience. She had to force herself to focus on Jalen, who wasn’t getting the division.
“Come on, Jalen. What about this? If you had four oranges and you had to share with Amari Thomas, how much would you have and how much would you give him?”
“I’ll give him all four,” Jalen replied, smiling in Amari’s direction. Raven rolled her eyes, frustrated.
“Raven, he’s a big man. He’s gotta eat about four or five oranges.”
“What about if you had to share with me? What if you wanted me to have half of the oranges?”
“Then I’d give you…two.”
“That’s right, Jalen. What’s the division sentence for that?”
“I don’t know.”
After an hour of academics the boys and girls prepared to have a practice session of basketball
with Amari. Kendra went out to watch and make sure the students were cooperating, though Raven doubted Amari would have any problems with them. She walked into the office, but her mind was also outside with Amari Thomas.
She could understand why she was now growing preoccupied with him. He was not only gorgeous, but he genuinely cared for the kids. He could be doing anything he wanted on his day off, but here he was in their dingy building working with their difficult students and seeming to love every minute of it. Raven wished she could talk to him about it, find out what motivated him, but there was no way a man like that would ever want to spend time with a woman like her.
I’m not his type, and I have nothing to say that would interest him.
Raven was powering up the computer when she heard a knock on the door.
“Come in,” she said and was surprised when Amari walked in.
“There you are. I need to buy one of the boys some shoes. He says he doesn’t have any gym shoes. Can you show me the nearest place to get them?”
Raven stared at him for few seconds, struck by his eyes. They hypnotized her and she felt foolish realizing that he probably had that effect on every woman breathing. He probably knew it, too. Even in the loose jeans and T-shirt he was a handsome sight.
“Do you know where The Sports Place is?” Raven asked.
“No.”
“Do you know where…”
“Just come with me and show me? I feel bad that he can’t participate. Can’t be too far, right?”
When he spoke Raven wasn’t even thinking, but listened to how his voice seemed to be entering her very being as it caressed her senses. She really felt lighthearted and breathless and wished her body would stop reacting that way.
I must be losing my mind, she thought. This is completely insane that he turns my knees to jelly and my mind to mush. Ridiculous!
“No,” she managed, then swallowed hard. She hadn’t felt any feelings since her very short-lived relationship at the end of college with Kevin Stanly. In the short time they had been together she wasn’t even sure he was the one but had felt the need to try and have a relationship. He was a mixture of Italian and German and also had a bit of Indian from his mother’s side. The only guys that ever seemed remotely interested in her were all white guys. The connection died when he had a one-night stand after a football game. She had told him it was over, and in all her adult life she had not had a single love affair to speak of. At thirty she had given up on ever meeting the right guy and knew very little about men. She was so averse to bars and on-line dating she just decided that if there was a man out there for her, he would look for her, not the other way round. Her father liked to tell her that God would bring a man to her but she doubted it. Raven felt many men were not attracted to her type at all.
Show Me the Sun Page 2