“I stayed home sick today, and I overheard everything. What the hell is going on?”
Oh, my God. As upset as I’d been, the possibility and consequences of Nick finding out hadn’t even crossed my mind. I even passed Nick’s car on the way up the driveway. How could I be so stupid?
“Nick.” Landon’s voice was strangled. “I’m so sorry you had to find out this way, man. Addy is the girl I’ve been seeing.”
I reached out to my brother, but he shrugged my hand off, his attention focused on Landon.
“How the hell could you sleep with Addy after I asked you to help protect her?”
Crossing my arms over my chest, I stepped between them. “Nick, calm down. I’m the one who initiated everything. Landon tried to do the right thing but I wouldn’t let him.”
“Oh, I’m not holding you blameless either, Addy,” Nick said. “Landon has been my best friend since we were two years old. He’s like a brother to me, and I thought he was like one to you, too. It makes me sick to think about how you could even bring yourself to do it.”
Landon had gotten to his feet, his large presence close behind me. The doorway was getting crowded.
“Come on, Nick, I understand it’s hard to take all at once, but it’s not that bad.”
Nick shook his head violently. “Save it. I’m going to go take some pills to knock myself out, and hopefully, the world will make sense in the morning.”
He turned and shuffled back up the stairs, refusing to make eye contact as he went.
My heart had taken a pounding, and there was only one source of comfort nearby. I turned to Landon. All I wanted was for him to hold me and tell me we would work it out, that everything would be okay.
“You should go, Addy. You aren’t allowed to be here.”
I fought back tears, but they resisted my attempts and spilled over, leaving hot trails on my face. Landon didn’t look much better off, but that didn’t help the situation. Everything had changed in the course of an hour.
We stared at each other for another half-minute. Reluctantly, I turned to go, walking slowly, ears straining to catch him calling me back.
The words never came.
~Landon~
“Please, Dr. Fraser, sit down.”
The Dean of the Faculty of Arts and Sciences, Dr. Koomen, gestured to the plush seat across the desk from his own chair.
“Thank you, sir.”
I settled into the seat, apprehensive but less nervous than I’d anticipated. The past few weeks of the investigation had wrung all of that out of me. At this point, I expected to be fired and had resigned myself to that outcome.
“I hope these past weeks haven’t been too disruptive to your work,” Dr. Koomen said. “I’ve been keeping an eye on you, Dr. Fraser, and your models have real potential. It’s exactly the kind of forward thinking Harvard strives to cultivate.”
I blinked. It wasn’t the way I expected him to start the conversation.
“Uh, it’s been going as well as it can. Dr. Cotton taking over my course for the interim has freed me to put all of my time into the project.”
Losing myself in work was the only way I could avoid thinking about the crater in my heart where Addy used to be. It didn’t help that every piece of the research had traces of her touch on it, but it was better than sitting at home and getting angry at how things had turned out.
“Good, good. Well, as you know, we’ve conducted as many interviews as we could and compiled all the data. From the report the ODR issued me, it appears as though you kept this relationship surprisingly under wraps. If it weren’t for Mr. Harrington entering your office while you were gone, no one would have had anything more than suspicions.”
I couldn’t prevent myself from gritting my teeth. “Forgive me if I’m not very happy with his part in all of this.”
The Dean’s lips twisted in a wry smile. “I suppose I can give you that much. A mitigating factor in this is that judging from the preponderance of evidence—interviews with you and Miss Hudson, as well as the email chain that Mr. Harrington submitted—the relationship was entirely consensual. In fact, judging from Miss Hudson’s reaction to hearing the news and the injuries Mr. Harrington sustained, his contention that she was being coerced does not hold water.”
That at least brought a smile to my face. The little prick had gotten what he deserved. Addy would get a light wrist slap for assault, but the judge had ruled that she was provoked with the hacking of her personal images and her account of Brody’s words.
“However, the relationship did still occur against the rules, and you were Miss Hudson’s professor and had also given her a position of research assistant underneath you,” Dr. Koomen continued. “In addition, there were many instances of questionable wording in the communication between the two of you that played with the power dynamics of those relationships.”
It irked me that over half a dozen people had read the exchanges between me and Addy. It wasn’t uncommon to roleplay off the idea that she was performing for marks or a better evaluation, but it wasn’t serious.
“As I mentioned in my interview, in no way did that ever affect her marks in the course. She’s a good enough student that she needs no extra help.”
Dr. Koomen nodded. “And that assertion was backed up by your teaching assistants. Now that we’ve touched on the salient points, let’s move on to my decision.”
The nerves I thought I’d swallowed came back in full force. The tone of the conversation had been more genial than I’d anticipated.
Maybe there’s some hope after all.
“Whatever discipline you recommend, up to and including my dismissal, I will accept,” I said. “I made a grave error, and I apologize for disrespecting the faculty’s rules and threatening the integrity of this institution.”
“You are perhaps the brightest young star in the economics department,” Dr. Koomen said. “I don’t want to throw you out over a small issue like this. You’re young, and it’s not unexpected that you will have feelings for students from time to time. However, you must not act on those feelings, are we clear?”
“Yes, sir.”
“Good. Now, you will retain your position provided you accept the following terms. You and Miss Hudson are forbidden from interacting. Passing each other in the halls may occur, but neither of you is to engage with the other in that event. In addition, a camera will be installed in your office to ensure there are no more breaches of conduct with her or any other students. That is all.”
My heart shattered. Until now, the sole consolation I’d held onto was that if I were fired, at least I could be with Addy as I looked for another job in Boston. Now, I was forced to choose between the career I loved or the woman I cherished.
Was sacrificing my career worth a relationship with a precocious eighteen-year-old who had so little life experience? We might make it a year before she realizes she wants someone else.
But it’s Addy.
We fit together so well, both sexually and mentally. She made me feel more fulfilled than any woman ever had and actively tried to help me move beyond my dark past. Until her, I hadn’t felt emotions that intense in my entire life.
I felt overwhelmed. Sitting in front of the Dean, I said the only words I could.
“I accept.”
~Adeline~
I paced my room. Since my roommate finished exams early, I had it to myself until I went home for the holidays.
Landon still hadn’t talked to me. The faculty had informed me of the results of the investigation and the decision reached. Unlike the typical other half of a sexual misconduct case, I hadn’t wanted there to be any investigation at all, but that didn’t matter.
Frustrated, I called Nick.
“Addy,” he said, voice neutral.
We had reconciled over the past couple of weeks. It took a lot of alcohol and explaining, but I finally turned him around on the issue, or at least stopped his anger. His friendship with Landon was too strong to break over a si
ngle issue like this, but they were still walking softly around each other.
“Nick, can you please hand the phone to Landon? He won’t talk to me at all. I haven’t heard from him since the day we found out about the complaint. If he’s paranoid about them somehow accessing his phone records, it’s your phone anyway.”
“Addy, I don’t know. He’s been pretty depressed. It’s impossible to stay mad at him. It’s like kicking a starving puppy. I didn’t realize that you were so into each other.”
“Just give him the damn phone, Nick.”
“Fine, Jesus.”
The phone rustled in my ear and I waited through a door opening and then knocking. Muffled voices argued back and forth for a while, and then the voice that haunted my dreams spoke.
“Addy, you shouldn’t have called.”
I shook my head even though he couldn’t see. “Their rules can’t hold us back, Landon. We just have to be more careful from now on.”
“No. It’s too risky, Addy, and we should have never gotten involved.”
His words struck deep into my heart.
“Are you turning your back on me? On what we have? Did I really mean that little to you?”
There was a long pause as my heart beat hard against my chest. I wished I could see his expression.
“You mean a lot to me, Addy. But you’re young, and you don’t even know what’s really out there. Your school career is just beginning, and you have so many reasons not to tie yourself to me. My academic career will be torpedoed if we get caught even talking to each other one more time.”
The shock I felt was unmatched by anything I’d ever encountered in my life. The past few months had felt like the start of something great, something strong. Something that would last.
I wanted to scream, to accuse him of being selfish, to say that he had taken advantage of me and was bailing out at the first possible opportunity.
Those were the hysterical rantings of another woman, though. I was better than that. I thought Landon was better than that, too.
“Tell me you don’t love me,” I said. “I need to hear it.”
Silence.
We’d never exchanged those words. I hadn’t rushed it, even as the feelings had built inside me. The depth of emotion I felt for Landon had shown me that the shallow high school romances I’d dallied in had been mere farces, training wheels until I found something real. I thought there would be time to fully explore what it meant to love and be loved.
“Addy…”
“Say it!” My voice rose. “Say you don’t love me!”
“Goodbye, Addy.”
The line went dead.
I stared at it, the tears falling again. With as hard of a throw as I could manage, I hurled the phone across the room. It impacted the wall and shattered, bits of glass, plastic, and electronics streaking in every direction.
“Fuck you, Landon,” I whispered as I sank onto my bed and rested my head against the wall. “Fuck you.”
Part 2
Ten Years Later
Chapter 9
~Landon~
“It’s good to have you here, Landon. Woolven Kleist is excited to see what fresh ideas you can bring to the table.”
I shook the offered hand. “It’s good to be here, Thomas. Thank you again for the opportunity. I’m excited to get to work and bring positive changes to the company’s strategy.”
Thomas Kelly was an intimidating man. The CEO of one of the largest multinationals in the world wore a navy power suit, and his balding hair was cut short but did not detract from the force of his personality. A longtime company insider, he had maintained strict control over all aspects of operations since his ascension to the top spot four years ago.
He was also now my boss.
“Your office is right next door to mine in the executive suite. Annie will show you later today. As my CFO, I want to be able to get our heads together on short notice when urgent issues come up. Please, sit.”
I nodded. It was to be expected.
Thomas’s spacious office had more square footage than the house I’d shared with Nick in Boston. It was spartanly but elegantly appointed, every detail finished to perfection, from the overstuffed leather couches in the sitting area to the velvet drapes framing an elevated view of the Statue of Liberty.
The slight shaking case of nerves I’d woken up with had settled a little but still made themselves felt in every deep breath I took.
They probably won’t go away for weeks, if not years.
Leaving Harvard had been difficult. Academia was where I had spent my entire career and felt most comfortable, but I was eager to see what kinds of results my methods could achieve in the corporate world. My research had stacked up the rewards and accolades, but the private sector would be the blast furnace that proved it to be solid gold or a cheap imitation that melted away under the heat and pressure. I couldn’t wait to prove myself.
The multimillion-dollar pay package hadn’t hurt.
Going from the very comfortable but solidly middle-class professor wage to an executive salary was a huge shock, and it still felt surreal, as if my colleagues had pulled off a particularly impressive stunt and would jump out from behind the curtains any moment.
“As we discussed in your interviews, Woolven Kleist has experienced a rocky few years due to the global climate, and the board of directors is eager for a big, bold change to shake up the status quo and reignite our brand and our business,” Thomas continued. “That’s where you and your computer models come in. If you can deliver, you’ll cement your name as one of the greatest economists of all time.”
I gave him a wry smile. “No pressure, right?”
Thomas returned my look with a raised eyebrow. “If you wanted no pressure, you should have stayed in school. This is the real world, and you’ll swim with sharks on a daily basis. Failure is not an option.”
Okay, no joking around with Thomas. Jesus.
“Trust me,” I said. “I will do everything necessary to ensure success.”
“Good.” He gave me a short, curt nod. “I was the CFO before I took over as CEO, and the management structure is mostly the same. It’s the only reason I took a risk on someone with so little management experience. I don’t expect you to be a faultless manager off the bat. You will make mistakes, but you have talented people underneath you, and they will help you learn. The number one priority is the rollout of your analysis and predictive models.”
That reassurance helped to ease my breath. I was confident in my models and the transformative power they could have on the organization. I’d managed small teams before, but those people hadn’t had dozens of people working for them.
“That will not be a problem,” I said. “Within a month, we will have the framework in place to truly start making a difference.”
Thomas gave me another look. “Let me give you a tip for surviving corporate politics, Landon. Whenever you are making promises or delivering good results, you want to use ‘I.’ If it’s bad news, then use ‘we.’ Take credit for success and spread failure around. Everyone else will be doing it, and you’ll handicap yourself if you don’t do the same.”
The frank advice caught me off guard.
“I’ll remember that.”
Not for the first time, I wondered what the hell I’d gotten myself into.
“Now,” Thomas said. “Let’s go to the boardroom. I’ve had Annie schedule meetings with your direct reports and their teams all day. First up is Financial Planning and Analysis, and then Accounting, Tax and Treasury, Internal Audits, and Mergers and Acquisitions. After you’re done with all of them, we’ll reconvene and I’ll introduce you to the rest of the executive team.”
The executive suite, as a whole, was an extension of the tasteful but spacious style exemplified in Thomas Kelly’s office. In downtown Manhattan, with its sky-high real estate prices, the broad, open spaces were more impressive than any opulent furnishings or expensive paintings could be.
Annie
met us outside Thomas’s office. She’d introduced herself as my assistant that morning when she’d met me with the car in front of my apartment and briefed me on the day’s schedule, as well as a refresher on corporate policies that I may need to know for my first day. Her efficiency was remarkable. The way she answered each of my questions gave the feeling that she wouldn’t easily be caught off guard.
She was also attractive in a buttoned-up, sexy librarian type of way. I couldn’t help looking at her tight blouse a few times, and it hadn’t gone unnoticed. The first policy she’d briefed me on was the strict no fraternization mandate between managers and any employees in their reporting organization. Chagrined, I kept my eyes fixed to her face from then on.
“The boardroom is through here,” Annie said, walking ahead of Thomas and me. “The Financial Planning and Analysis group is already in there waiting for you.”
She opened the door for us.
“Thank you, Annie,” Thomas said. I echoed his sentiment and squared my shoulders to project confidence as I walked through the doorway.
The boardroom was huge—it could seat fifty people at the table itself, and another seventy or eighty in chairs ringing the outside wall. A massive screen took up an entire wall, and small microphone pucks were embedded every few feet in the perimeter of the table.
Only twenty-five people sat at the table at the moment, a relatively even mix of genders, slanted toward male. Most were dressed in suits.
A woman in a classy work dress stood from near the head of the table and strode forward.
“This is Rose Woods,” Thomas said. “She leads the team, and she worked under me while I was CFO, so I can attest to her effectiveness in the role. Rose, this is Landon Fraser, our new CFO.”
She had fiery red hair that fell in slight curls to her shoulders, her face showing slight signs of age but professionally made up to minimize the fact.
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