But would there be someone out there she could love as much as she had loved Tyler? There had to be! And who was to say she couldn’t grow to feel that way about Chris?
Savvy continued her conversation with Chris as she prepared the next day’s snacks. She and Lexi had been shopping, but, unfortunately, neither had felt like eating, so they hadn’t ended up with much. Maybe Tyler’s pantry had something they could take with them. In a cupboard she discovered a huge three-pound bag of milk chocolate M&Ms. She grinned, knowing this would lift Lexi’s spirits better than any medicine she could give her; she’d never met a child who didn’t love the candies. And Tyler loved M&Ms more than he loved spaghetti–which was saying a lot.
She’d barely hung up the phone with Chris when the doorbell rang. Her heart thumped inside her chest. Oh, Tyler, she thought. Not tonight. She was feeling too good to dredge up her feelings for him. Yes, they’d have to be faced but not until after tomorrow–after she discovered the truth about her birth father.
Taking a breath, she thrust open the door, hoping Lexi was so involved in her TV show in the family room that she wouldn’t hear the bell. Her eyes widened. “Dad! Oh, you’re home!” In the next minute she was enveloped in his strong arms. “I was waiting for you to call.”
“Call? No way. I had to see my girl.”
Happy tears pricked Savvy’s eyes, and the burden on her soul lightened. She noticed his rumpled suit, how his dark hair looked mussed, and the tightening around his brown eyes that betrayed his exhaustion. “You came straight from the airport, didn’t you?”
For answer, he hugged her again. Jesse Hergarter wasn’t tall, but he was still a good head taller than Savvy. In his arms, with his familiar scent flooding over her, she felt like a little girl again–warm, protected, loved. And most importantly, wanted. “I’ve missed you so much,” he murmured.
“Daddy,” she whispered, her voice catching in her throat.
He held her tighter. “I know all about it. Your mom told me. I have to admit, it’s been a big a shock for me, as I suspect it’s been for you. I’d almost forgotten he existed. You’re mine, you know that, right?”
“I know. I wish I didn’t have to–”
“But you do, and I know that. What’s more, I always knew that one day you would.” He drew away, holding her out as though scanning her face for changes. “You’ve grown only more beautiful these past months, you know that? You remind me so much of your mother.”
“Thanks, Dad.”
“I mean it. But you look like him, too. Mostly in the shape of your eyes.” Jesse seemed more weary as he said it, and a little sad. For the first time, Savvy noticed the white peppering his dark hair, gathering in bunches at his temples.
“Dad, about tomorrow . . .”
He shook his head. “Whatever he is to you, you’re my little girl. Forever and ever. We are tied together through your mother, our memories, and our love.”
Savvy blinked at the tears spilling from her eyes. “I know that. I really do.” And suddenly she saw it. The sealing that binds families together for eternity was not so much a line as a web, branching out and connecting loved ones forever. She might be sealed to her mother and birth father, but she belonged to Jesse’s family now through her mother.
“I must be the luckiest girl in the whole world,” she said.
He chuckled. “Are you going to invite me in? I could sit for a while.”
“Oh! I’m sorry.” She backed into the room and shut the door behind him. “Let’s sit, but not here. Come into the family room. You have to meet Lexi.”
“I’m looking forward to it. But what’s all this about Tyler going with you to Colorado? Your mother loves that boy, you know. If she were twenty years younger, she’d probably marry him herself.”
“He’s coming because Lexi wants him.”
“I could go, if you want.”
Savvy shook her head. “No. You’ll have a lot of work to catch up on after being out of the office so long. Besides, this is something I need to do on my own.” Tyler didn’t count, of course. He was only a friend, not family.
“Okay, but remember, I’m only a phone call away.”
“I’ll remember.” Savvy led him through the kitchen and into the family room. “Hey, Lexi, I have a surprise. This is my dad.”
* * *
Lexi’s stomach felt as though she’d eaten too many sour grapes, but she’d scarcely picked at the pancakes Savvy had made that morning. She was too worried about what would happen in Colorado. The Internet map they’d printed said they had eight hours before they arrived in Brighton. Eight hours before she would face her dad.
As she hefted her suitcase, she was torn between wanting to run away and wanting to hurry home to make sure he was all right. Was he really out of the hospital as the detective had said he would be? She hoped so. She even said a prayer like the ones she’d heard at Savvy’s church. For some reason she felt better afterwards–not that she really gave much thought to that churchy stuff. Savvy had already talked her ears off enough about Joseph Smith and his vision. Lexi had her own Book of Mormon now, a gift from Tyler, who, she decided, probably bought the books by the case–if she could believe the stories he told about others he’d given books to.
Outside, Savvy was loading a suitcase into Tyler’s Jeep. It struck Lexi how different Savvy looked from Jesse Hergarter, the man she’d called father all these years. Last night, Lexi had been surprised at his visit, but she immediately liked the man. Which was funny, since she’d been prepared to hate him. After all, he was the man who’d kept Savvy from searching for Lexi and for Savvy’s real father. If he’d been a horrible father or even a smidgeon less attentive, maybe, just maybe, Savvy would have come looking for her instead of the other way around.
Meeting Jesse, Lexi understood why Savvy hadn’t felt the need for another father; he was everything a father should be. He certainly wasn’t a man who would throw his child away and give up. Not in a million, trillion years, she thought. A longing sprang up inside her chest. She wanted a father like that. A father who not only loved her but would fight for her. A father like she knew Tyler could be.
Living with Tyler continued to be Lexi’s new plan. It’s my agency, she thought. My choice. Somehow she had to convince Tyler that it was for the best–and her father.
On the drive to Colorado, Savvy let Lexi sit in the front seat, claiming she had some work to do. Lexi knew it couldn’t be real work, because she’d overheard Savvy talking with her father about finishing everything for her upcoming classes.
Lexi was far more interested in Tyler’s plans. She hoped he’d get that job in California, so she could at least see Savvy now and then–not that she needed to see her, or anything. She also had to make sure Tyler wiped that stupid look off his face whenever he gazed at Savvy. What was it with guys, anyway? It would put a serious crimp in Lexi’s new plans if Savvy and Tyler somehow ended up together. Lexi didn’t think she could prevent herself from loving Savvy too much if she had to live with her every day. Loving her too much and then somehow losing her.
Hmm, I’ll have to do something about that, she thought to herself.
The trip was more pleasurable than Lexi expected. For long minutes she forgot her dread of the pending confrontation as she exchanged words with Tyler. She tried out paradigm, perfidy, and pernicious (she had reached the Ps in her dictionary), and he retaliated with archetype, dissimulation, and injurious, which, when she looked them up in her dictionary, were linked to her own words. She was amazed that he knew so many without having to study them out. The game was pure bliss.
That bliss ended abruptly when Savvy leaned forward with the directions in her hands. “We’ll need to get off the freeway at the next exit. We’re almost there.”
* * *
Savvy didn’t know what to expect in Brighton, and Lexi was characteristically silent about what they might find. In fact, Lexi seemed happy to sit in the front seat and pretend that they weren’t heading for her home–and also tha
t Savvy didn’t exist. Savvy tried not to mind that her sister ignored her. After all, she’d made the choice to sit in the backseat where she wouldn’t run the constant risk of meeting Tyler’s intense green stare and wonder if he might try to kiss her again. Above all, she needed to keep a clear head. Her stomach was in a turmoil already, wondering how she would be received by the father who had given her away.
What was wrong with me? Surely she hadn’t been too fat, too crabby, or too irritating.
Stop it, she told herself.
She looked ahead and saw Tyler staring at her, their eyes meeting in the rearview mirror, as they had far too many times today. His green eyes were bright and compelling, his expression tender. Had he ever looked at her that way before? Savvy stifled the urge to glance behind her to see if someone else was there–someone thinner, of course. Instead, she held his gaze as long as politeness demanded, gave him a half smile, and then stared out the window.
Savvy had pumped her mother for information about her birth father but had learned little more than she already knew. At the time her mother had been married to him, Derek Roathe was an advertising manager in the company where he worked, on the fast track to success. Now he probably owned a big house and expensive cars. Would he think she wanted money from him? She’d have to make sure he knew that her adoptive father was a successful businessman and that with only a few more classes, she would have her own degree and her future well in hand.
“Down there, at the end. Corner house.” Lexi pointed, her face tight with what Savvy guessed was excitement layered with fear. The girl had worn black eyeliner today and navy blue eye shadow, and the colors made her face appear pale and fragile.
They pulled up at the house, one every bit as small as Tyler’s brother’s house in Sandy before the additions. The house matched its neighbors in size, though it possessed an air of abandonment the others on the block didn’t share. The yellow siding was stained, and the tiny single garage gaped open, revealing a jumble of odds and ends that families accumulate over the years. The lawn was brown from lack of water, and the small front flowerbed was overgrown by weeds. The narrow porch had no railing, and the three cement stairs leading to the front door were flaking. By comparison, Savvy’s parents’ comfortable house was a mansion.
This certainly wasn’t the house of a worldly man who had left his wife to pursue his own dreams. This was the home of a careless man who saw nothing in his future. The only thing of beauty was a huge shade tree that would offer protection from the hot summer sun but which also created a sense of darkness and gloom.
Biting her lip, Savvy followed Lexi up the walk, passing a nondescript brown sedan and a dull metal mailbox that looked like every other mailbox on the street. Lexi opened the door, and Savvy’s step faltered. She would have stopped altogether if she hadn’t felt Tyler’s hand at the small of her back, gently propelling her forward. She could feel the heat of his touch through her shirt, though reason told her that was purely imagination. She wished she could grab his hand and hold it tightly.
If the house surprised her, Savvy was even more shocked by the wasted figure of the man seated in an easy chair by the front window. He was thin to the point of gauntness, his once-handsome features jutting from his face as though tacked on as an afterthought. His fingers curled over the padded arm rests and the jeans he wore couldn’t mask the bony legs. Only the bright blue color of his sunken eyes resembled the charismatic man in the picture Savvy had brought with her from her mother’s photo album. Pity rose in her chest. This was Derek Roathe, the man Lexi was afraid of? The man she herself had dreaded meeting? Savvy found it difficult to believe.
Derek had eyes only for Lexi. “Where have you been?” he said, turning off the TV with the remote.
She hung her head and remained silent. Somewhere in the house dinner was cooking, but the smell wasn’t appetizing, increasing Savvy’s queasy feeling at the pending confrontation.
“Come here.” His voice was firm but not cruel.
Lexi dragged her feet across the gold-colored carpet to his chair, her body slightly hunched and her left shoulder jerking nervously.
“They tell me you haven’t been to school at all except the first day.” His deep voice showed no trace of weakness. “That’s a whole week you’ve missed. All the notes, all the lies–why, Lexi?”
Lexi’s shoulder ticked again, a helpless, exaggerated movement noticeable to everyone in the room. An emotion flickered over the man’s face, but Savvy didn’t know him well enough to decipher what it might mean. Disgust? Anger? Compassion?
“I’m not going to Minnesota!” The words spilled from Lexi in a single burst.
Derek’s jaw clenched, and he gave a sharp shake of his head. “Go to your room. We’ll talk about this later . . . alone.” He glanced at Tyler, who had stepped farther into the room than Savvy. Her hand was in his, though she didn’t remember how that happened. The pressure of his fingers was reassuring, but with it also came an awareness of him that made her want to cry.
“Thanks for bringing my daughter home,” Derek said. “I’ll take it from here.”
Savvy’s heart felt like it was beating in her throat. She tried to step forward, but her feet wouldn’t move. This wasn’t how she envisioned the meeting. They would have introduced themselves properly. They would have exchanged small talk, maybe even touched briefly on the past before getting into the reasons Lexi ran away. But there was no chance of that now. Savvy made her voice as hard as his. “No,” she said. “We’re not leaving. We have to talk. There’s been a few . . . accusations.” She thought he might look at her then, but his gaze shifted back to Lexi.
“Accusations?”
“Like how she got that scar on her leg.” Tyler shifted his weight to his other foot. Savvy was glad he didn’t let go of her hand.
All the sharpness seemed to leak from his face. “Lexi,” Derek said in a soft, sad voice, “what have you been telling them?”
Lexi stared at the carpet and didn’t speak.
Shaking his head, Derek looked toward Savvy and Tyler. “There’s nothing to tell. I can explain–” His voice broke off as his bright eyes rested on Savvy. “I, uh . . . Brionney?” He shook his head. “No, you must be . . .” He glanced at Lexi, who had lifted her eyes from the carpet. She gave a tiny nod, and Derek’s head whipped back toward Savvy, all traces of color gone from his thin face.
“I’m sorry, sir,” Tyler said. “I thought the detective would have told you who was bringing Lexi home. Or the hospital. I did call last night. They said you couldn’t talk right then.”
Derek dipped his head, acknowledging the comment, but his eyes didn’t leave Savvy’s face. “Savannah,” he breathed. “You look just like your mother.”
Hope blossomed in Savvy’s heart. Maybe now this meeting would get back to how it should have been.
Then Derek’s head began to shake back and forth, slowly at first and then more violently. He leapt to his feet. “No!” he said. “No!” His face flushed a deep red as he jabbed a finger toward the door. “Go! Leave now. I don’t want you here! Go!”
Savvy’s mouth gaped in shock. Of all the negative scenarios she had contemplated, his rejection of her had never been so forceful, so complete.
“But–” she began.
“Out!” He pointed at the door again. The veins in his neck bulged. “You’re not wanted here.”
With a shattered cry, Savvy opened the door, pulled her hand from Tyler’s, and escaped from the house.
Chapter Nineteen
Tyler stood in front of the open door, stunned. He wanted more than anything to follow Savvy out of the house, but he worried also for Lexi’s safety in the clutches of this apparently insane man. Flexing his hands, Tyler had to stop himself from cracking his fist into the man’s face.
“Oh, Daddy, how could you!” Lexi glared at her father, tears rolling down her face. “Why did you do that? I can’t believe it. I know you’ve wondered about her, but now you’re driving her away–t
hrowing her away. Oh, but you’re good at that, aren’t you!”
“Lexi, go to your room!”
“No! I won’t, and you can’t make me. I hate you, Daddy. I hate you!” With that, Lexi darted past Tyler and ran out the door. Tyler went after her onto the front porch, but she ran down the street past a group of children on bicycles and disappeared around a neighbor’s house.
No use in following her at the moment, Tyler thought. She knows her way around. She’ll be safe. Better that he concentrate on finding Savvy. But even as he made the decision, he spied Savvy sitting in the backseat of the Jeep. Relief washed through him. He should have known. She wasn’t a child like Lexi who would run off irresponsibly.
Tyler turned back to Derek Roathe. The man’s pale face was hard as rock, his eyes rimmed in iron. “I can handle my daughter,” he said. “I don’t need your help, and I don’t need anyone checking up on me.”
Hair rose on Tyler’s neck at the man’s audacity. “We’re not leaving without Lexi,” he retorted. “You aren’t getting rid of us that easily. Savvy and I care about Lexi, and we’re not about to allow you to treat her that way.”
Derek’s nostrils flared. “I’m doing the best I know how.”
“Well, that’s pretty lousy, if you ask me.” Tyler was tempted to say more, but his heart was urging him to go to Savvy. Besides, he’d learned a lot in the past days with Lexi. Maybe everything wasn’t as it appeared between Lexi and Derek. Shaking his head, Tyler turned to leave.
“Wait.”
Blinking once in surprise, Tyler hesitated. “What?” he asked. “Haven’t you hurt enough people today? Have you any idea what you did just now?” When the older man didn’t respond, Tyler continued. “All her life, Savvy’s wondered about you, wondered why you gave her up. Wondered why she never received so much as a card or letter. It’s something that has affected her whole life, though she never let most people know how she felt. We’ve been friends for years, but only recently did she admit that she always suspected that you gave her away because something was wrong with her. And now she finally has the opportunity–and yes, courage–to face you, and you reject her. How dare you act this way! How dare you?” Tyler’s vehemence was meant as much for himself as for Derek. How had he himself rejected Savvy all these years? “You’re a blind, bitter fool,” he added. And so am I.
Huntington Family Series Page 79