I needed a cold shower. The coldest shower known to man. I needed it now.
Ten minutes later I thought I had myself under control when I stepped out and wrapped the huge grey towel around my hips. Staring at my reflection in the mirror, I debated shaving, then remembered the way Mia had traced her fingers over my stubble and decided to leave it. Quickly I brushed my teeth and turned to head back into my room, cursing my stupidity for not bringing a change of clothes in with me. Reaching for the door handle, I spotted something that stole any remaining self-control I possessed. A navy-blue lace bra had been dropped and was lying teasingly on the tiles. Reaching down, I picked it up and felt everything hidden beneath my towel tighten.
Sucking in a deep breath, I let the bra dangle from my fingertips as I pulled open the door.
The view when the door creaked open was something that would be forever burnt in my memory. Mia was bent over in front of me, her scantily lace clad ass sticking up in the air as she struggled to pull on her jeans. I groaned. Or maybe it was a moan. It didn’t matter. Either way, it was filled with want.
Mia spun wide-eyed, and I couldn’t help but grin as embarrassment crept up her neck and burnt her face. It was only there for a second. Mia was too stubborn for it to be visible any longer. Instead she squared her shoulders and stiffened her spine, causing her braless boobs to poke forward. I could see her nipples poking at my shirt, and that was enough to make my cock hard enough to pound nails.
“See something you like?”
“I see everything I like,” I admitted, my voice so thick and husky even I barely recognized it.
“You’re incorrigible.”
“You’re stunning.”
Mia squirmed under my compliment. Realising how uncomfortable they made her, I made a mental note to shower her with as many compliments as I could. She was a beautiful girl, inside and out; she deserved to know it.
“Got everything you need?” I asked slyly.
“Yeah.”
She looked at me like I’d lost my marbles. This was going to be fun. I tucked her bra into the back of my towel and moved towards the closet.
“Have you got plans for today?”
“I’ve got to head to the gym for a while and get some paperwork done. Then I have a couple of appointments to look at some apartments.”
“Apartments?”
“Yeah.”
“You’re moving?” As I said the words, it crossed my mind that I didn’t want her moving. My possessive, inner caveman was beating his chest. Although I didn’t understand why she lived with her parents, at least there, I knew she was safe. She’d always have someone looking out for her. Someone to make sure she got home safely. Someone to make sure the monsters in the dark didn’t get her. Mia living alone…nope, didn’t like that. Not at all.
Mia bit her lip. I wanted to bite it. And when she flopped back onto my bed, I had to shake my head to clear the inappropriate thoughts. “Yeah. It’s time. I’ve been thinking about it for a while now, but after the other night…”
Her voice trailed away and I couldn’t help but puff out my chest. This firecracker ball of a woman had me whipped. The smirk danced on my lips and I didn’t give a shit. If she was still thinking about the other night, then at least I wasn’t the only one.
“What are you doing tonight?”
A strange look covered her face as my question sunk in. She had the most adorable wrinkles between her eyes and I couldn’t stop myself. I leant forward and kissed them. When I pulled back, I waited for her to kick my ass, but again, she surprised me. Squeezing her eyes, she took a deep breath. “Nothing exciting,” she confirmed breathlessly.
“Stay here tonight.”
“What?”
“Stay here again tonight.”
“Are you sure?” She looked stunned.
I tightened my grip on the towel at my waist before I crouched down to meet her eye level. “Abso-fucking-lutely. Mia, I want you here every night. I don’t care if we just sleep. But I want you here. Don’t ever question that. Falling asleep with you in my arms has made me the happiest I’ve been in a long time.”
Her mouth fell open. I loved that I’d shocked her. I was an asshole like that.
“Okay,” she agreed meekly.
“Okay?” I needed her to say it again. I don’t know why, I just did.
“Okay.”
“Okay. Fuck it!”
“What’s wrong?”
“I just remembered I have to work. I’ll see if I can swap.” I was annoyed at myself. How could I have forgotten I had to work?
“Derek.” Mia’s voice was soft and sexy. “It’s fine. You go to work, and if it’s okay with Zoe, I’ll hang here and have a girl’s night. Then when you finish, I’ll be here. Waiting.”
It was a fucking brilliant idea. I wish I’d thought of it myself. Right now though, it wasn’t important. Mia would be back in my bed tonight. Right where she belonged. It didn’t matter who thought of it and who didn’t. As long as the outcome was the same, I was a happy boy. A very happy boy.
“Sounds perfect.”
Honestly, I was impressed that I was able to form actual words. All the blood in my body had pooled in my groin and I had to put some distance between us before I did something dumb. Rocking back on my feet, I grabbed some clothes and darted back into the bathroom to get changed.
“I believe this is yours.” I tossed Mia’s bra at her and winked before locking myself on the other side of the door before she had a chance to reply.
Chapter 28
Mia
I floated on a cloud all day. Usually I was the first to comment how pathetic girls were who went all gaga over a guy, and unfortunately in this moment, I was one of the worst. I’d gone into the gym, and after almost an hour staring at the same pile of forms, doing nothing more than shuffling them from one side of my desk to the other, I gave up and went and joined a class. I had energy I needed to burn. If I was spending the night in Derek’s bed again, I had to do something to calm myself down or I couldn’t be held accountable for my actions.
Stepping up to the door, I balanced the pizza in one hand and the plastic bags in the other. Ringing the door bell, I stepped back and waited. It was weird. I was nervous. My stomach was doing flip-flops and I didn’t understand it. It was only Zoe. Derek wasn’t even home. Suddenly my backpack felt like it weighed a ton and the impulse to turn and run was almost too enticing.
“Hey Mia. Come on in.” Zoe beamed as she waved me inside, taking the pizza. “What’d you bring?”
“I think the more accurate question is, what didn’t I?”
Together we unpacked the shopping. I’d gone overboard, I know that. But it had been so long, since I’d had a girl’s night in, and truthfully, I was still trying to impress Zoe. I needed to get on her good side. I knew how important she was in Derek’s life, so I needed her on my side. It was more than that, though. I wanted her on my side. Together we quickly unpacked the chocolate biscuits, ice cream, and wine.
Three hours, two bottles of wine, way too many biscuits, and a few Ryan Gosling movies later and I was more than ready to call it a night. I yawned loudly as I stretched out my legs in front of me. “I think that’s me.”
“Yeah, me too. Do you need anything before I head to bed?”
“I’m all right. Derek said just to make myself at home.”
“Absolutely. Well, good night then.”
Pushing open Derek’s bedroom door, I turned back to face Zoe, who had a quirky smile. “I had a great time tonight, Mia. Thank you. And as for Derek, I love him. With everything I have and everything I am, I love him. You’re good for him. I know you are. I just hope you know that you are.”
I couldn’t help myself. I dashed across the hallway and wrapped my arms around Zoe. In a few simple words, she’d managed to squash any lingering doubts I had and make me feel like I belonged. More importantly though, if Zoe could see it, then maybe, just maybe I wasn’t in this alone.
“Hav
e a good night, Mia. He usually gets in around two.” She waggled her eyebrows.
I had no words. How was I supposed to respond? I knew exactly what Zoe was insinuating. I might be blonde, but I wasn’t dumb. So I bit my lip, nodded, and remained silent. Instead, I stepped inside Derek’s room and shut the door with a soft click. The moment it shut, I felt my heart take off like a freight train. I was alone in Derek’s bedroom and I was freaking out. My only saving grace was that Derek wasn’t here to see me panic.
Trying to pull myself together, I shuffled into the bathroom, changed into my pyjamas, and brushed my teeth. It felt odd to be getting myself ready for bed in someone else’s bedroom…and not just someone else’s, but Derek’s. Finishing up quickly, I made my way back into Derek’s room, pulled back the covers, and noticed the new sheets. Tonight I was slipping into navy sheets that smelt fantastic. The whole room smelt clean. A moment later, I settled back against the pillows and killed the light.
What felt like a life time later, I glanced at the clock. It wasn’t quite midnight and I was wide awake.
Mia: Guess where I am???
I couldn’t help it. I was surrounded by everything Derek except the one thing I wanted the most. The man himself. It didn’t take long before a reply came.
Derek: ???
Mia: In bed…
Mia: Your bed. <3
Derek: You’re killing me, Tinkerbell.
The wide smile that crept over my face made my cheeks ache. After another twenty minutes of tossing and turning, I turned the light back on and leapt from the bed. I knew it was wrong. Every single fibre of my being reminded me that it was wrong. But I couldn’t stop. I walked around the room, my fingers lingering on every surface. I flicked through magazines on the nightstand, checked out the photos on the wall, then I found it. It must have fallen out when I’d been tossing and turning in the bed. On the floor, right near Derek’s pillow, was the shirt I’d worn the night before. Folded perfectly. He hadn’t tossed it in the wash. He’d kept it. Deliberately. My heart felt like it was going to burst. Picking it up, I set it back under his pillow. If this was a secret Derek wanted to keep, I’d let him. I wouldn’t even make fun of him for it. Well, at least I’d try not to.
Climbing back into the huge, empty bed, I knocked over the stack of magazines, sending them spilling to the floor. Carefully I picked them up, and that’s when I found it. I know I’d been snooping, hell, I’d even pulled open his drawers looking for secrets, but I hadn’t really expected to find anything. Derek didn’t seem the type. But then there it was. A stack of unopened mail. Quickly and anxiously I flicked thought the stack. Mostly there wasn’t anything that caught my eye. Well, at least not until I got to the bottom of the pile. There was one with a postmark from the police force. It looked official. It looked intimidating. It felt heavy in my hands. The nosy bitch part of me was dying to rip it open and see what it was all about. Instead I put it back where I found it and turned my curiosity to the matching envelopes. One was addressed to Zoe, the other Derek. His had been opened, Zoe’s remained sealed.
“What the hell?”
Setting them aside, with heavy thoughts I turned off the light and flopped back against the pillows. With my mind swirling, I knew exactly who I needed right now. The one person who would know what to say. The one person who would understand. The one who knew everything. Every sordid and every dirty detail. I needed Josie.
Mia: Can we talk?
It was surprising when my phone chirped almost immediately.
Josie: What’s up?
I didn’t want to have this conversation over text. I needed to see her. The truth was, more than anything, I needed her to hug me.
Mia: You got time for coffee tomorrow?
Josie: Seriously, Mia, what’s going on? Talk to me.
Mia: Just need some girl time…
Josie: I can’t tomorrow.
Mia: OK.
My heart sunk. Something was wrong. This wasn’t the first time she’d dodged me lately. It was really starting to piss me off, but I didn’t have time for her bullshit. Frustrated and tired, I turned off my phone and threw it on the floor, willing myself to sleep.
I woke up freezing. All the blankets had been ripped away. But it was only for the briefest moment before I was tugged up against a hard, warm chest.
“Sleep, sweetie.” Derek’s warm breath tickled the back of my neck. It felt right. It felt like home. Closing my eyes, I let sleep carry me away.
When my eyes cracked open, I couldn’t help but nuzzle against Derek’s naked chest. Sometime through the night, I must have wrapped myself around the gorgeous hunk of man beside me. Breathing in, I was surrounded by his intoxicating masculine scent. The urge to lick him made my mouth water.
“Now, a guy could get used to waking up like this.” Derek’s sleepy voice was deep and raspy and did all sorts of things to my body.
“Morning,” I replied before I started pressing not so innocent kisses against his chest.
“Wh-what are you doing, Tinkerbell?”
“Nothing,” I mumbled as I shifted so I was straddling his hips. Leaning down, I placed soft kisses on the edge of his smirking lips.
“Why don’t I believe you?” Derek growled, and before I knew what was happening, he’d flipped us so I was beneath him, caged in by his arms.
Three hours and too many orgasms later, I stood in Derek’s shower, the water pounding down on my head. I took my time washing my hair and letting the steaming water ease the aches in my overworked muscles.
“Mia! Come on! If you don’t move that sexy ass, I’m coming in,” Derek called through the door.
My smile consumed me. I was happy. Happier than I could ever remember being. And it scared the shit out of me. The sad part was, I wasn’t used to it. I didn’t deserve it. Fuck, Derek didn’t deserve to be dragged into my bullshit. I just didn’t know if I had the strength to confess. I know I needed to. I was well aware that I owed him the truth before this went any further, but the moment I thought about what I would say, when I tried to find the words, I felt like a steel band wrapped itself around my chest and started to squeeze.
Chapter 29
Derek
I moved around the kitchen, humming to myself. I don’t remember the last time I’d sung while I cooked. Hell, I don’t remember the last time I had someone that I even wanted to make breakfast for. Well, other than Zoe, but she didn’t really count. Mia was something else. Work last night had been especially painful. Knowing that Mia was curled up in my bed had me horny and on edge all night, so when some bullshit cat fight between two overly eager and scantily dressed idiots broke out, I almost lost my shit. I didn’t want to deal with this crap. I had places to be. People to be with. It was then and there I realized my time as a nightclub bouncer was over. After I’d shoved them both in their separate taxis and sent them on their way, I found Mick and promptly resigned. I should have been nervous about what came next, but I wasn’t. Thankfully, I’d been smart and had a small nest egg which would see me through for a while, but there were decisions that needed to be made.
Flipping the pancakes over in the pan, I realized that even though I wasn’t sure where my life was headed or what my next step was, I was more than okay with it. Well, I was, right up until a high pitched squeal broke my peaceful morning.
Switching off the burner, I ran through house like a man possessed.
“Mia! Mia! Shit, Mia!”
I tried the bathroom door and the fucker was locked. “Shit, Mia!”
The fear was paralysing. I could hear the painful cries on the other side of the door and it hurt. My god, did it hurt. My heart was pounding. My fists clenched. I wanted to break down the door and get to her. I needed to. Yet there was something holding me back. As much as I wanted in, I forced myself to slide down the door frame and wait it out. I don’t know how long I sat there. It might have been a minute. It might have been an hour. The only thing I was sure of was when the water shut off, I held my breath.
I heard the lock turn and the overwhelming desire to jump to my feet swallowed me, but I managed to stay right where I was. Slumped on the floor, staring at the carpet, I let out a relieved sigh when a set of purple toenails stepped into view.
When Mia slid down the door frame opposite me, I couldn’t help but look at her. She was stunning―even with puffy eyes and quivering lips. It was obvious she’d been crying, there was no mistaking that. Despite her tear-stained cheeks, she was gorgeous. She was still wearing my shirt with her tight ass jeans again. The ones that magically made my own jeans seem too small. It took everything I possessed not to reach for her. Instead, I laid my hand out on the floor between us, hoping she’d take it.
The silence was killing me, but I’d be damned if I was going to be the first to break it. I would sit here all day if that’s what it took. Mia was more important than my aching, numb butt.
“I guess you heard that, huh?”
I nodded. Suddenly my mouth was as dry as the desert. I tried to swallow, but there was nothing there.
“I don’t know why that happened. Okay, that’s a lie.”
I turned to look at Mia. Her face was contorted with pain. There was fear in her eyes and I hated it. I wish I knew what I could do to take it away. Feeling useless didn’t sit well with me. It never had.
Running Away (Finding Your Place Book 2) Page 18