by Sharan Daire
“I could have hurt you.”
“But you didn’t. I wasn’t scared of you.”
“You should be.”
She had the audacity to toss her head a little and laugh in my face. “I’ll never be scared of you.”
I gritted my teeth, fighting down the urge to show her just how nasty I could be. To prove that I didn’t deserve her. That she’d be better off without me. “I could have hurt you. Badly.”
She shrugged. “Even if you had hurt me, it would have been an accident. Not intentional. You’re not the horrible, dangerous person you think you are.”
I opened my mouth to retort that she had no idea what I was capable of, but she jabbed me in the chest with her finger. It stilled me, as surely as if she’d shoved a knife into my chest. Not because it hurt—but because she dared to do something that could have antagonized me into full-blown rage.
If she didn’t trust me to stay in control.
“You’ve done the work to heal yourself. You’ve surrounded yourself with people who love you. You’ve gotten help. You’re not alone and lost and raging at the world any longer. You’re here, with us, and we love you. If you need help, we’ll get it, but I won’t be scared of you. I won’t send you back to your chair, doomed to only watch what happens in this bed because you’re afraid. Or because you think I’m afraid. Because I’m telling you now, I’m not. I’ll never be afraid of you like that.”
I closed my eyes, trying to believe her.
“You’ve been pushing yourself extremely hard,” Everett said. “You’re working insanely long hours, even for you. You don’t sleep. You barely eat. It’s no wonder that all the stress got to you.”
D loosened his grip on me, freeing my arms. “Even badass Marines need to fucking sleep.”
Grudgingly, I blew out a sigh. I had been pushing myself hard. We only had a few days left to perfect everything. We were all on high alert, watching Shelby’s every move to make sure she wasn’t trying to do too much. That she was getting rest and food and water. I was always hyper-alert to my surroundings, but this pregnancy made my awareness even more focused on her. Like I needed to make sure she was still breathing every single moment of the day.
“What do you need?” She repeated, stroking her fingers soothingly over my face. “What can we do to help?”
“I’m going to get up and take some meds to help me chill out. And we’re going to sleep in and take the day off tomorrow.”
She kissed me, her lips achingly soft and tender. “That’s a good start.”
I sat up and gave D a hard shove to get him up out of my way so I could get up. Though I made sure to give him a silent acknowledgement of immense gratitude. He’d read the situation and acted swiftly to diffuse the situation before I could get out of hand.
Grinning, he nodded. “Mama will be thrilled that you’re off tomorrow so we can all hang out.”
I groaned, fighting the urge to punch myself for forgetting our visitors were arriving tomorrow. Mrs. Anderson was flying in from Florida, and Eleanor was driving in from St. Louis for dinner. And I’d just burned my only decent excuse for skipping everything to make last minute alternations and arrangements for the trip.
“Kaleb thought it’d be great to have a big family BBQ as long as the weather cooperates.” Everett smirked, knowing damned well I hated big get-togethers. “Even the Daniels are coming, as long as Angela’s up to a short ride in the car.”
I appreciated them all coming together to help us make this trip happen. But fucking hell. The last thing I wanted to do was sit for hours and manage polite conversation.
Fucking great.
19
Shelby
I knew Mrs. Anderson must be a kind and good person to have raised such kind and good children to adulthood. Given what I knew about the Anderson dairy farm and the snippets I’d picked up from the guys, I expected her to be a hardy gray-haired grandma who was equally comfortable wearing an apron or heading out to the barn to milk the cows.
I had no idea how this five-foot-tall dainty lady had managed to birth three children, let alone twins. Slim and tanned, wearing a colorful Boho skirt, she looked like Angela’s older sister, not her mother. Derek and Kaleb both dwarfed her, but she was giving out hugs so hard that Derek actually grunted.
I leaned closer to Chris and whispered, “I thought you said she might need help with the kids.”
He whispered way too loudly. “It was a joke. Mrs. Anderson could take on the entire Marine Corp with no problem.”
“You bet your britches I could, Christopher Blakely.” Mrs. Anderson said tartly, though she gave him a fond smile as she held out her hand to me. “I’m Renata, and you must be Shelby.”
I took her hand. “It’s a pleasure to meet you, Mrs. Anderson.”
She snorted and pulled me in for a tight hug. “None of that, dear. Please call me Renata or Mama. Everybody but Christopher does. It’s been almost forty years since I married my Thomas, but I still look over my shoulder for his mother when I hear Mrs. Anderson.”
Derek slipped his arm around my waist. “How’s Grandma doing?”
“Mean and ornery as usual,” Renata replied slowly, watching me intensely.
I had a full-blown moment of panic. What exactly had the twins told her? Did she know that we were all involved, or not? Was there going to be uncomfortable questions about exactly what our relationship entailed?
I’d assumed they’d already told her, or else why would they have invited her to babysit my kids while we were in New York? Both Derek and Kaleb had proposed to me, along with Everett and Chris. Surely they’d told their mother before she got here…
Oh my god. What did she think about this? Me? Dropped into her sons’ laps with two small children and now another on the way?
Her head tipped a little as she studied me. Her eyes narrowed, and she started to say something, just as another car pulled up in front of the house.
“TayTay!” Allie squealed, racing Liam toward the car.
Marlo climbed out and hurriedly came around to the passenger door to help his wife out of the car. Heavily pregnant with her own set of twins, Angela struggled up out of the seat, her eyes brimming with happy tears. “Mama!”
“There’s my baby.” Renata went to her daughter and enfolded her in a tight hug. “Let’s get you off your feet. You should have let me come to you!”
With Marlo on one side and her mother on the other, Angela came toward us. “I wanted to get out of the house. I’ve been going stir crazy.”
“We’ve got a spot set up for you to kick back and relax,” Kaleb said, holding the door open for them to pass through. Derek released me to grab his mother’s suitcases. By the number and evident weight as he dragged them up the stairs, she planned to stay for quite some time.
Of course, she’d want to stay for Angela’s delivery and maybe even a few weeks after the babies were born, assuming everything went well. But after that intense stare Renata had given me…
I was suddenly glad we were headed to New York for a week. I pushed back a wave of regret as we followed everyone inside. I’d never had a good relationship with Rob’s mother, and certainly not with my own. It would have been nice to have a mother-like role in our lives, especially for my kids. They’d never had anyone but me in their lives until we’d come to the lodge.
It was nice watching them, though. Angela sank down into the recliner with a happy sigh of relief while her mother asked her all the health questions. Patting her hand, nodding and smiling, Renata gave me the impression of being a mama bear. Soft and cuddly with her children, but mean and fierce if anything dared to threaten them.
Gulp. Hopefully she didn’t turn that mama bear attitude on me and decide that she needed to protect her sons from me.
Kaleb and Derek both leaped to take care of both their mother and sister before anyone even thought to ask them. Derek hauled the suitcases upstairs. Kaleb brought an entire tray of drinks and snacks. He even brought out some pillow
s and helped adjust Angela’s position to take some of the strain off her back.
It was so damned sweet that my eyes burned. They loved each other, and it was absolutely precious. This was what family was supposed to do for each other. Even Taylen immediately involved the kids in a quiet yet fun game, minimizing any noise that might trigger a headache or disturb Angela.
Everett came over to me where I sat on the opposite side of the sectional. Leaning down, he pressed a chaste kiss to my lips, uncaring that strangers—at least to me—were witnessing a very public display of affection. “Eleanor is almost here. I’m going to head down and help her with her bags.”
Cheeks flushed, I surprised him by standing up. “I’ll come with you.”
Always a gentleman, Everett took my hand and pressed a kiss to my knuckles. “Of course. She’s dying to meet you.”
Avoiding meeting anyone’s gaze, I followed him out of the room. Maybe it was my imagination, but I was pretty sure I could feel Mrs. Mama Bear Anderson’s stare drilling into my back.
EVERETT
Anticipation burned in my veins. Hope and dread warred in my chest, but hope was winning. My heart knew exactly what was going to happen, but my head was filled with what ifs and strategies if things didn’t go as planned.
If Eleanor didn’t like Shelby…
I couldn’t fathom how anyone wouldn’t like her. No, love her. As much as me. So I knew the whirling tumble of frantic worries were just that. Worries. Anxiety. I loved Shelby so much. As much as I loved my sister. I couldn’t bear it if they didn’t immediately love each other too.
Eleanor parked her red Mini Cooper and stepped out looking like a fashion plate from the Sixties. She was only twelve years older than me, but she’d always had a vintage, dramatic flair that had been completely wasted in our small town. Long hours of work had put lines on her face and shadows under her eyes before she’d been twenty years old.
I’d never known anyone who worked as hard as her, except maybe Chris. Now a non-profit charity in St. Louis got the benefit of her tireless dedication. After she and my brothers had done so much to put me through law school, I’d paid them back as much as they would let me.
Which wasn’t much. The Mini Cooper was the last big present she’d allowed me to give her, and that’d been over five years ago.
With a big smile, I headed down the steps to grab her suitcase. “Hey, Sis. How was the drive?”
“Fine, except for all the potholes on the interstate.” She gave me a peck on the cheek, which was huge for her. She’d never really been much into physical displays of affection. “At least there wasn’t a lot of road construction yet.”
“They’re waiting until summer so they can screw up as many people’s vacations as possible.”
She snorted and stepped back, crossing her arms. “Let me look at you.”
I straightened my shoulders and tipped my chin up, pretending to be a schoolboy lining up for inspection.
“Well, I’ll be.” The soft note of wonder in her words drew my gaze to hers. Her eyes shimmered and she leaned in quickly to give me a fierce, brief hug. “It’s true. I’m so happy for you.”
I hugged her back, silently trying to tell her how much this meant to me. How much Shelby meant to me. Evidently, she’d seen that love in my eyes. I’d only mentioned our guest in vague terms, unsure how much Eleanor would want to know about our complicated relationship. She would have known that Shelby was important to me, simply because I asked my sister to come help us.
“Let me introduce you.” I turned toward Shelby, hauling the heavy suitcase up the steps. “Eleanor, this is Shelby, my fiancée. Shelby, my eldest sister, Eleanor Scott.”
It was the first time I’d said fiancée out loud. An intense wave washed through me. Elation, yes, but also a sense of possessiveness. Mine. Shelby was going to be mine. She wore my ring. She might not end up with my name, but she’d have the protection of every skill and resource I had to offer.
Shelby held out her hand. “I’m so happy to meet you.”
Pushing past me, Eleanor wrapped her up in another big hug that almost made me cry like I was four years old all over again. “Oh, honey. I’m so happy. Welcome to the family. I’ve hoped that my little brother would find someone as much as I loved my Paul. I have to admit that I almost gave up hope.”
I grunted in acknowledgement. “I’d given up hope too. I should warn you—”
Eleanor waved her hand dismissively. “I know all about the vow you made to your friends.”
“What vow?” Shelby asked, her eyes searching my face.
“He didn’t tell you that story?” Eleanor gave me a look of reproach, shaking her head. She looped her arm with Shelby’s as they walked inside. “Well, let me tell you all about it.”
Their heads were close together, arms linked. Shelby’s eyes were bright and inquisitive. My standoffish, often staid older sister had even given her a hug. So I knew all was right in the world. They were going to love each other as much as I loved them both. So I didn’t even mind that Eleanor was going to tell the saddest story of my life.
20
Shelby
I paused outside the main living room, listening to all the voices flowing rising and falling inside. They were all happily still talking, mostly about Angela and how she was feeling. Though Mrs. Anderson evidently thought their name choices were up for debate.
She had a strong opinion about the names Finley and Skylar. “They’re just so… so… neutral. There’s nothing about their names to indicate they’re twins, either.”
“That’s the point, Mom.” Angela rolled her eyes and blew out a sigh. “You’re the one who chose Derek and Kaleb. Certainly nothing shocking or exciting with those names.”
I wasn’t ready to go back to the lion’s den yet, so I detoured us over to the stairs. “Why don’t I show you your room?”
“That would be lovely.”
I wasn’t sure which room Derek had taken his mother’s things to, but I guessed he would have automatically given her the spare room they rotated through when one of them stayed upstairs. I checked the room next to it, and no bags. “Will this one work?”
Eleanor hmphed beneath her breath. “Is the dragon next door or across the hall?”
Everett laughed. “Now, now, Sis. She’s not that bad. She’ll be next door. The kids are across the hall.”
“Well, if she gets too overbearing, then I’ll just bunk with the kids. How old are they again?”
“Liam’s eight, and Allie’s four.” I’d immediately liked Eleanor but having an ally against Mrs. Anderson made me feel even better. “Thank you so much for coming all this way to help us with the kids while we’re in New York. I’m pretty nervous about it, honestly. I’ve never left them anywhere before, other than work, of course.”
“Never?” Eleanor exclaimed. “Oh honey, that’s absolutely criminal. You’re definitely overdue for a grown-up vacation.”
“You’re a big one to talk,” Everett said. “How many vacations did you take when we were younger?”
She sniffed dismissively. “That was entirely different. We didn’t have a choice.”
“Neither did I,” I said before I caught myself. Hoping to change the subject, I quickly asked, “What was this vow you were talking about earlier?”
“It’s a long story,” Everett said. “And it was a very long time ago.”
Eleanor plopped down on the edge of the bed. “But none of us are in a rush to get back downstairs, are we?”
I took the bedside armchair. With a sigh, Everett sat on the bench at the foot of the bed. Worried, I searched his face. “We don’t have to talk about it if you don’t want to.”
He leaned closer and took my hand. “Not at all. I don’t mind. Though I’ll warn you that it’s a sad story.”
“Why don’t you tell it?” Eleanor asked gently.
He stroked my hand, tracing the lines on my palm. “I told you before that I never knew my father. Mom worked herself to
death. Literally. She waited on tables all day, usually gone in the morning before we got up for school, and then she picked up cleaning jobs on the evenings and weekends. She never had a day off, even if she was sick. Maybe if she’d gone to the doctor when she first started having issues, she could have had surgery or chemo, but she refused to go. It took her being completely incapacitated by pain and unable to eat before she admitted something was wrong. She was gone in a matter of weeks.”
“At least she didn’t linger,” Eleanor whispered. “I just wish we’d known how sick she was so we could take care of her. She never let on at all until it was too late.”
I squeezed Everett’s hand. “How old were you?”
“Six. The worst part wasn’t Mom passing away, though. It was how bad I felt that her death didn’t upset me. Guilt ate me alive. Everyone was so upset, but I barely knew her. Eleanor got me up for school, gave me baths, and fed me, because Mom was at work. She was a mother to me before ours passed away.”
“I always wished you could have known her better.” Eleanor dabbed at her eyes. “She’d have been so proud at everything you’ve accomplished despite our humble beginnings.”
I fought to keep from crying. The story was definitely sad but it hit way too close to home. Bubby had done more for Allie than a young sibling should ever have to do, simply because I had to work so much, only to scrimp and starve and finally lose the apartment. Luckily, I had been able to leave the situation, and even more miraculously, found Derek when my car broke down alongside the road.
But what if Bessie had broken down in Arkansas? What if I hadn’t been able to get gas to get us out of Texas? What if…?
I’d been far too close to losing everything I cared about in the world.
“The first few months after her funeral, things went on pretty much as usual,” Everett continued. “At least, to me they did. I didn’t know how much we were struggling.”