by JM Stewart
It was wonderful and amazing and absolutely terrifying.
A couple blocks down, a familiar shop came into view. She glanced at Gabe. “Since you picked up the tab for dinner, dessert’s on me. I know a great little bakery. It’s just down the street.”
Gabe stopped on the sidewalk and stared at her for a long, unnerving moment. His gaze worked her face, as if he were deciding something. Finally, he drew a deep breath and released it. “You know, we could always take it back to my place. I’ve got the house to myself until Sunday morning.”
Steph’s heart hammered. He hadn’t said the words, but his invitation blinked at her like a neon bulb. His eyes filled with a gleam she’d seen so times in the past she knew it almost by heart. Hunger so intense a shiver slid through her in response. Her knees wobbled, and her core throbbed. God. Eleven years, and he still had the power to make her wet with a single glance.
Saying yes would be impetuous, of course, and everything she’d sworn she’d stop doing when she’d signed up with Military Match. Yet his offer was irresistible. Gabe wasn’t any lover. The man made her toes curl. The last time they made love, he’d left her breathless and spent and closer to him than any man she’d dated up until that point.
What harm could a weekend do?
She smiled and nodded. “Sounds good. Come on.”
She turned back to the street and they started off again. If she didn’t focus on her destination, she’d either drag him into a dark corner and plaster her mouth on his or talk herself out of going home with him. Luckily, Gabe didn’t press further but walked quietly beside her.
At the end of the block, she pushed into the familiar shop. Lauren’s Chocolates and Pastries sat at the end of the row, surrounded by stores with everything from jewelry to books. Inside the entrance, a three-foot-tall wooden bear carrying a white wedding cake grinned at her. Trent had given it to Lauren on her last birthday. That bear made Steph feel at home every time she entered.
“Friend of mine owns this place.” Steph released Gabe’s arm and headed for the register, where Elise, Lauren’s assistant, was boxing up chocolates for another customer. She smiled as Elise looked up. “Hi, Elise. She around?”
Please say no. Between her two best friends, Lauren was the quiet, shy one of the bunch. She’d still tease her, though, and while she wasn’t sure she could handle the, albeit good-natured, ribbing right now, Lauren’s bakery was the best in the city. She’d put up with the possible humiliation to get her hands on some of Lauren’s incredible chocolate-chocolate chip cookies. They were her guilty pleasure.
“Hello, hello! No. I’m afraid not. She took off about an hour ago.” Elise looked up and flashed a smile that lit up her whole face.
Elise was in her midfifties, though you couldn’t tell by the dark shade of her hair. Hair she insisted she hadn’t dyed to cover gray. She had the kind of disposition Steph envied, always so cheerful and friendly. No matter how bad of a day Steph was having, coming in here and chatting with Elise always pulled her out of her funk.
Now her smile did exactly that—relaxed the knot in Steph’s stomach. She blew out her held breath. For sure when this weekend was over, she’d need a gabfest with Lauren and Mandy, but she didn’t want to do it now, while on a first date. And a blind one at that, with a man she had a long, complicated history with.
“I know this place.”
Gabe’s voice sounded behind her, full of awe and recognition. Steph turned a confused frown on him. “You do?”
Halfway up the shop, he’d stopped to look around him. His gaze landed on her again, and he headed in her direction. “My detailer’s girl owns this place.”
It took her all of two seconds to understand what he told her.
“Oh my God. You’re that Gabe.” Lauren’s fiancé, Trent, worked as a detailer slash mechanic in a custom motorcycle shop. The few times they’d all gotten together, she’d heard him mention his boss, Gabe, but she’d never thought anything of it. There had to be a thousand Gabes in Seattle, right?
Suddenly the world seemed a whole lot smaller.
A slow grin curled across Gabe’s face, like he’d arrived at the same conclusion she had. He waved his fingers in the air, singing, “It’s a small world, after all.”
A giggle popped out of her. She’d forgotten that side of him, the playful guy who could still be a great big kid.
Gabe’s grin widened. He sidled up to the counter beside her and set his hands on the surface. “So, what’s good?”
Elise, proud baker and worth every penny Lauren paid her, winked. “Everything.”
Gabe chuckled.
“Give us a dozen. Make it a mix.” Steph waved a hand in the air. “Surprise me.”
“You got it, honey.” Elise smiled and turned to pull a white bakery box from the counter behind her, then moved down the display case.
Gabe moved with her. For every item, Elise would point, then arch a brow at him, and Gabe would either frown and shake his head or give her a thumb’s-up. Several of Lauren’s gourmet truffles went into the box, along with a decadent cupcake and several cookies. Steph lost track after that.
The dozen complete several minutes later, they moved back to the register. Gabe hip-bumped Steph out of the way and pulled out his wallet. When she opened her mouth to protest, he winked at her.
“My treat. Because I can.” When Elise handed him back his card, he smiled, giving her a two-fingered salute. “Have a good night.”
As he grabbed Steph’s arm and headed for the front entrance, Elise grinned and waved a hand at her face, mouthing, Hot!
Steph swallowed her tongue trying to hold back her giggle and waved instead. “Bye, Elise.”
For sure, Elise would tell Lauren she’d stopped by with her date, no doubt giving her the lowdown on Gabe, but Steph couldn’t care less at this point. The girls would pounce on her tomorrow anyway.
They walked in silence again, returning to where he’d left his bike in the restaurant parking lot. He released her arm, moved to the rear and tied the box to the back with the same mesh bungee the spare helmet had been strapped down with. Once finished, he turned to her. Despite his playfulness inside the bakery, something somber played in his eyes as he tucked his fingertips into his pockets. “So, my place, right?”
She turned fully to face him. As she stared up into those eyes, her stomach wobbled. God, it still amazed her. When she’d decided to go along with Mandy to this dating service, she’d been bound and determined to do things differently. To take things slower than her normal routine. That her date ended up being Gabe had thrown her for a loop. As sure as she stood there, all those old emotions crept over her, and the part of her that refused to get hurt again screamed to get the hell out now.
All of which meant she hadn’t a clue where this was going. She only knew she couldn’t resist him now any more than she could eleven years ago.
“That’s the second time you asked me that. It tells me you’re nervous, which makes me curious…” Drawing a deep breath, she laid a trembling hand against his chest. He was still as warm as she remembered, like he had his own internal space heater. “What do you want from this, Gabe?”
Heat flared in his eyes, answering the question, but he gave her a gentle smile all the same. “I could ask you the same thing.”
Her insides wobbled again, and all sensation pooled between her thighs. Oh, she could deny it, but she knew damn well what she wanted. Him. Preferably naked beneath her. If she remembered correctly, he preferred the cowgirl position. The very thought of hugging his lean hips and sliding onto his thick erection nearly wrenched a needy moan from her throat.
She offered him a playful smile. “That’s a non-answer.”
The corners of his mouth twitched. “So is that.”
He took a step closer, staring for a beat, a silent communication they’d shared a thousand times before. Anticipation sizzled through her blood. Then he cupped her face in the warmth of his palms and settled his mouth over hers. Steph
sighed into the connection. Damn it, she couldn’t help herself. His kiss was everything she remembered and then some. A gentle tangle of lips and a soft stroke of his tongue. Her mouth fell open of its own accord, and she pressed her body into his before she even realized she’d moved.
By the time he finally pulled back enough to meet her gaze, her knees had turned to Jell-O and her panties were drenched. She’d have followed him anywhere.
He gave her a tender smile and lifted a hand, stroking the shell of her ear as he tucked away a lock of hair. Those intense eyes worked her face, his body trembling against her. “That was familiar, huh?”
She let out a breathless laugh and dropped her forehead to his chest. “Your kiss still packs one hell of a punch.”
His quiet laugh rumbled through his chest as he wrapped his big arms around her, pulling her tight against him. He went silent, holding her, and for that brief moment she allowed herself to get lost again in the luxurious feel of being in his arms. How could it be that even eleven years later, he still had that addicting pull over her? Like the time hadn’t passed at all, one kiss, one touch, and she crumbled to his whim. His to take. She’d need to be careful if she wanted to make it out of this weekend with her heart still intact.
Which meant she needed to redraw her boundaries.
“So we’re in agreement, then? This is just for the weekend?” She couldn’t allow herself to get caught up in him again. “I won’t deny I want this. You. But I need it to stay short-lived.”
He nodded, his warm hands working her back, slowly stroking up and down her spine, driving her to distraction. “I know the way I left must seem rather…callous to you. We can talk about that later if you want.”
She smiled, relieved he understood. “Sounds good.”
He released her, mounting his bike and pulling it upright. Steph climbed on behind him and allowed herself the luxury of wrapping her arms around him. If she only had until Sunday morning, she intended to enjoy him.
* * *
They arrived back at the park five minutes later. For a moment neither one moved. Steph loathed the thought of letting him go. She’d always loved riding with him. Sitting with her arms around him, the wind roaring past her helmet. Now it gave her a chance to be close to him after so many years spent missing him.
With a deep breath, she forced herself to let go, climbed off the bike, and unstrapped the box of goodies, tucking it under one arm. He restrapped the extra helmet to the back, then stood facing her. “Follow me? I’m in Redmond. Let’s hope there’s no traffic.”
She nodded. Instead of climbing back on his bike, though, Gabe stood staring at her. The odd look she remembered from earlier crossed his features again. Somber and broody. As if something heavy weighed on his mind he was trying to decide whether to share.
He confirmed her suspicions when he tucked his hands in his pockets, something she recalled him doing often back in college. “There’s something you’re going to need to know about me. Something I need to show you. I’d rather do it at home, though, if that’s all right.”
She searched his face. “Is it bad? ’Cause you look nervous again.”
He let out a quiet laugh and reached up to rub the back of his neck. “I am. It’s not something I tell people often, but if we’re spending the weekend together, you’ll need to know, because it’s unavoidable.”
She laid a hand against his chest. “Whatever it is, I’m sure it’ll be fine. Come on. Let’s go.”
When he nodded, she moved around her car and climbed behind the wheel, setting their dessert in the passenger seat.
A half hour later, she pulled up behind him in a long driveway. Steph eyed the house as she grabbed the box of goodies and climbed from the car. He owned a small rambler, painted a beautiful shade of fern green. The porch was set back from the walkway so that it resembled an alcove. Seated beside the door was a small rocking chair, behind it a single window that somehow added to the hominess of the place.
Gabe, keys in hand, came to stop beside her and hooked his thumbs in his pockets. “Home sweet home.”
Steph turned to eye the neighborhood around them again and tossed him a teasing smile. “Gabe Donovan, you live in suburbia.”
The entire neighborhood sat back off the main road in one of the many prefabricated housing developments that had begun cropping up all over the place. The houses were all of similar sizes and colors, every lawn, including his, perfectly groomed, each backyard hidden by a six-foot privacy fence. Gabe’s place sat at the end of a cul-de-sac that came complete with a basketball hoop lined up in the semicircular road.
Gabe rolled his eyes, one corner of his mouth hitching as he turned toward the house, making his way to the front door.
“I’m a single father. Where did you expect me to live? Some of us”—he shoved the key into the dead bolt lock and shot a crooked grin over his shoulder—“have actually grown up.”
That sexy grin sent a riotous mass of butterflies fluttering in her stomach. Her palms grew sweaty. She’d forgotten that, too, the addicting playfulness of being with him, how easy it was.
He shoved the door open, stepped inside, and turned to the wall on the left, hitting a light switch and illuminating the interior.
Steph swallowed a sudden case of nerves and followed him inside, stepping up onto a colorful welcome mat. “I may have gotten older, Gabe, but I refuse to grow up.”
He closed the door behind her and stood studying her. His gorgeous hazel eyes glittered with amusement and filled with heat. “You haven’t changed.”
Her stomach dipped and swayed like a high school girl staring up at her first love. All she could see, all she wanted to see, was him. Oh, how she used to love being against that broad body. What was it about a big man that made her shiver all over?
She offered a friendly smile, hoping to cover the reaction she couldn’t contain. “You have.”
“That’s what happens when you have kids.” He jerked his head toward the interior and turned, moving farther into the house. “Come on.”
They stepped out of the three-by-five hallway that served as the foyer and emerged into the main room of the house. The kitchen, living room, and dining room all formed one large, open space. Gabe led her off to the kitchen on the right.
Steph stopped at the island separating the kitchen from the living room, set the bakery box on the counter, and turned to take in the space. The house had a definite woman’s flair. Maroon decorative throw pillows sat tucked into each corner of the tan sofa, and elegant gold lamps sat on the mahogany end tables. The pièce de résistance, though, were the opaque white curtains covering the sliding glass doors. No man she’d been with had ever bothered with curtains, Gabe included.
Back in college, she never would’ve pictured him here, but she had to admit the place had a certain charm. She wanted a house like this someday, and the family to fill it. If she was ever going to get that life, she needed to banish her defense mechanisms. Otherwise she’d be alone forever.
She took a seat at the breakfast bar. “Nice place.”
He moved around the opposite side of the island and laid his hands on the surface, that lone corner of his mouth hitching. “You sound surprised.”
She shrugged. “I still see you in that studio apartment you had at U Dub. No headboard on the bed, a beat-up old sofa.”
He glanced around, melancholy seeming to hang on him for a moment. “Julia’s handiwork. I’ve gotten used to it.”
At the mention of his wife, her heart did a little clench. Getting a glimpse into what his life with his wife had been like had the green-eyed monster roaring in her head.
She firmly ignored it. The woman was dead for crying out loud.
She chose, instead, to focus on him. After sliding from the stool, she moved around the counter and came to stand beside him. “I’m sorry about your wife.”
Everything else aside, her chest ached for him and his daughter. She knew the pain of losing a parent. She’d lost her moth
er at the ripe old age of seven. Lost her father to the alcoholism that developed after Mom died. Dad was sober these days, living in a halfway house in Puyallup somewhere, but not by choice. Refusing to play the part of his enabler anymore, she’d had to let him sit in the mess he’d made of his life, and he resented her for it. He never called, and when she called him, he never had anything nice to say. She was essentially alone in the world.
“Thank you.” Gabe looked over at her. A tiny crease formed between his brows as he frowned. A heartbeat later, he turned toward her and closed the distance between them. His scent swirled around her, his body heat infusing hers as he looped his hands around her waist and tugged her against him. “So. I should tell you now. Before we get too deep into this.”
Simply being against his big, warm body had her shivering all over, heat dancing across the surface of her skin, but it was the intensity playing in his searching eyes that caught and held her attention. There was that look again.
“Why do I get the feeling this news is bad?” More to the point, why did the thought of it make her stomach drop?
He gave a slow shake of his head, his voice low and somber. “That depends entirely on you.”
Hands caught between them, she rubbed slow circles over his chest, trying to soothe his obvious tension. “Whatever it is, maybe you should just get it over with. Like a Band-Aid. Rip it off quick.”
He let out an uncomfortable huff of a laugh. “That’s exactly what Marcus said.”
“Now you’re starting to scare me.” She ducked down a bit in an effort to look into his eyes. “Gabe, what on earth is it?”
He finally looked up. His body trembled against her, but he held her gaze, bold and unapologetic. “You mentioned earlier that I hadn’t changed much. Truth is, parts of me have.”
Chapter Four
Gabe’s heart hammered his rib cage. The way Steph stared at him, eyes wide and curious, waiting patiently for news he still wasn’t sure he wanted to share, made his insides shake. It gave him the sensation of standing naked in front of a room full of people, like all his secrets were laid bare before her, which wasn’t far from the truth.