by Jessa Russo
“Yeah, bye.”
I hung up the phone with a sigh. I should have been excited for another date with Toby, but instead, I was worried. I didn’t know how I would feel when I saw him again if the sound of his voice alone had brought back all that gory vividness of my nightmare.
Gah! It was just a dream!
But I couldn’t help playing it over and over in my head when I thought about Toby or looked at Frankie.
Frankie could sense it; he could always sense my moods. He came back a few minutes later and stayed by my side as much as possible the rest of the day. My fear slightly eased around him but never fully went away. He didn’t ask me about the nightmare again, which I appreciated, knowing it was difficult for him. He didn’t ask me about my phone call with Toby, which again, must have been incredibly difficult for him.
As we spent Sunday morning together, waiting for the time to come for me to head to work—later than usual because Jo finally decided the early bird adoptions were pointless—Frankie talked about normal everyday stuff, like cars, music, and movies. He talked about my school stuff, and the animal shelter, asking me questions I knew he already knew the answer to, just to keep me occupied.
As irrational as it was, I couldn’t shake the horrible foreboding that had filled me since awaking from my nightmare. Still, even more irrational than that was the fact that I feared Toby because of what I feared he would do to Frankie. It made zero sense.
You can’t save him.
As I walked out to my car to head to work, the words from my dream echoed through my mind for the thousandth time since waking that morning.
You can’t save him.
I couldn’t save him. Frankie who couldn’t be killed. Frankie who was already dead. I tried again to decipher my crazy dream as I drove the short distance to work, annoyed at how ridiculous it all was.
Jessie wasn’t at the shelter when I arrived. She was always there before me, but her pink bug was not in its usual front row spot. Still, I searched the lot and surrounding areas, thinking maybe she’d decided to park somewhere else. Not likely. With a shrug accompanied by a little bit more of that foreboding feeling I couldn’t seem to shake, I headed inside.
The door was locked which meant that I had to use my key to get inside for the first time in all the time I’d worked there. A quick check of the voicemail informed me that Jo had a family emergency and wouldn’t be coming in at all today. I relaxed at that knowledge, happy that Jessie wouldn’t get penalized for being late even though it unfortunately meant I had the task of getting the whole front office ready for business—which was Jessie’s job and something I was completely unfamiliar with.
I dialed Jessie’s cell number from the office phone, and then her house number, getting no answer at either one.
I’m sure it took longer than it would have if Jessie had been there, but eventually, after checking on the few employees in the back kennel and getting someone to cover for me, I headed to the front window, flipped the cardboard sign over to announce that we were open, and sat down to wait for the day’s customers. I was completely unsure of what to do next, so as I waited for something to happen, I returned to trying to sort out my love life. Ha.
An hour later, no further in my thoughts than I’d been when I started, a huge, bright yellow Hummer with tinted windows and an obnoxious roll bar pulled up. Blocking both handicap spaces, the monstrosity idled in front of the shelter.
Annoyed, I stood up to head out the door, determined to suggest the driver park in a proper parking space. Before I could get outside, Jessie’s long, pink-covered legs descended as she jumped down to the ground from the passenger side. Relief flooded me at the sight of her, and I instantly felt silly. I don’t know what I’d thought had happened to her, but irrational or not, I’d been worried. Her platinum hair was not in its usual sleek bob, hanging perfectly at the sides of her face, but instead was pulled back into a clip that would normally horrify Jessie.
Though it wasn’t the hair clip that really shocked me.
It was the USC sports jersey she wore over her pink maxi skirt. Never mind the fact that it wasn’t pink, or that it was three sizes too large. As if those things weren’t enough, seeing her in her most hated college colors was a huge shock. There was one thing I knew for sure in life and that was that you were either UCLA or USC. Never both. And if you were one, you hated the other. It was just … I don’t know … the way it was I guess. My eyes were wide, and my jaw was on the floor when she walked in.
“Oh, Ever! I’m so sorry I’m late!” She quickly looked around as if trying to locate our boss. “Where’s Jo? Is she so pissed?”
She walked right past me and sat down in the chair I’d just vacated, instantly turning to the computer screen and looking busy—as if it was totally normal that she was an hour late. And wearing a USC shirt that clearly doesn’t belong to her.
“I totally overslept!”
“It’s almost four in the afternoon, Jess.” I’d finally found my words.
“Oh, Ever, I wasn’t really sleeping.” She giggled and winked at me like she was letting me in on an extra special secret. I couldn’t keep from smiling even as I chastised her.
“Jessie!”
“Shh! Jo will hear you!”
I shook my head, laughing. “Jo’s not here, Jess. Where have you been?”
“She’s not? Oh phew!” She looked around, smiling devilishly, and rolled her chair over to where I stood.
“Sit! Sit!” She motioned to one of the lobby chairs. “Oh my gosh, Ever! Remember the guy I met yesterday at Starbucks? I think he’s the one.”
She said the one with such emphasis and complete seriousness that I couldn’t help but laugh.
“What? He is! His name is Greg, and he’s a sophomore at USC. Can you believe it? I told him we’re going to UCLA next year, and he doesn’t even care. He joked about us being star-crossed lovers. Can you imagine it? I’ll be a freshman already dating a Junior! Eek!”
She was so excited that I couldn’t possibly crush her spirits by telling her to slow it down, but I knew that so many things could happen between now and then. I mean, it was only April, after all.
We spent the rest of the day in the front office, and I learned every single thing there was to learn about the love of Jessie’s life—whom she’d only known for 24 hours, but who’s counting?
On the way home, we stopped at Jessie’s so she could pick up a few things before I drove her to her car. She’d apparently left it at Irvine Spectrum where she’d met up with Greg the night before.
The beat-up F-350 in the driveway indicated that Susan had someone over.
The Confederate flag hanging off the antenna and the ‘Guns don’t kill people, I kill people’ bumper sticker indicated that that someone was probably a real winner. The plastic balls hanging from the rear bumper didn’t help either.
“Ugh. Come in with me?”
“Of course.”
When we opened the door to the house, the smell of cigarettes and marijuana wafted out. We just looked at each other and, rolling our eyes, braced ourselves for what we’d probably find inside.
Jessie’s mom was lying on the couch in nothing but panties and an oversized NASCAR t-shirt, her legs draped over a shirtless man in his late thirties or so. Of course, by his weathered smoker’s skin and unkempt facial hair, it was anyone’s guess how old he actually was. He could have been in his twenties for all I could tell.
He let out an appreciative whistle when he saw us, pushing Susan’s legs aside to stand.
“Ow! Hey!”
“Well you must be the daughter,” he growled as he looked Jessie up and down.
“Oh gross,” Jessie said, her lip curled upward. “Get real, dirtbag.”
“What in the hell? Get back here, you little bitch!”
Jessie was already down the hall, but I was a bit slower in my retreat, shocked that he’d spoken to Jessie like that. Shaking myself out of my stupor, I just shook my head at Susan and st
arted to turn to head down the hall after Jessie. My mom would have never let anyone speak to me that way.
“What? Don’t you shake your head at me like that Eleanor. And you tell my little bitch of a daughter to watch her mouth. That’s not how we treat company in this house.”
“Eleanor, hmm? Well, well, look at the rack on you.”
My eyes widened in disbelief, and I crossed my arms over my cursed chest. I quickly made my way to Jessie’s room, Susan’s and her boyfriend’s mocking laughter following me down the hall. I heard Susan trying to lure her boyfriend back to the couch, her sweet, trying-to-be-sexy tone giving me the creeps.
Jessie was already returning from her room, a hastily packed duffle bag dragging behind her, and we almost collided in the hallway. She shook her head and walked past me.
“I’m sleeping at Ever’s tonight,” was all she said as we headed outside, the screen door clanging shut behind us. Once in the privacy of the car, she let out a long sigh. I gave her arm a squeeze, knowing she probably didn’t want to talk.
I definitely did not tell her about the comment the guy had made about my ‘rack.’
Toby knocked on the door promptly at eight, but of course I was running late.
This time, however, I wasn’t late because of difficulty picking out an outfit, wasting too much time enjoying the hot water in the shower, or even my dawdling for no apparent reason. This time my nerves had me moving slowly.
I was scared of seeing Toby. Irrational? Yes. Ridiculous? Definitely. But scared nonetheless. I couldn’t shake last night’s nightmare, or the strange sense of foreboding it left me with.
Frankie was as intact as a ghost could be, pacing the hallway outside my room. He hadn’t said a word to me, but I knew he was mad I was going out with Toby again. As long as I knew where Frankie was, I could handle his anger. At least I knew he was safe.
Safe. What a ridiculous thought. How lame is it that I was even worried for his safety in the first place? He’s dead! Shaking my head at myself, I said goodbye to Jessie, who was lounged out on my bed watching TV and texting with the one. I took one last glance in the mirror, grabbed my purse, then headed out to meet Toby. Once outside my bedroom, Frankie stopped me, clearly unable to stay quiet any longer.
“Don’t go, Doll.”
His pleading mirrored my own irrational thoughts, but I couldn’t tell him that. I also couldn’t delay any longer with Toby obviously waiting for me outside.
“Frankie,” I said with a sigh, “You know I’m dating Toby. Please don’t make this difficult for me. I want to be happy. I … I want to have a boyfriend.”
Frankie shook his head eerily reminding me of the ghost on the ship, and disappeared. This time as I approached the front door, the butterflies in my stomach were fluttering for totally different reasons.
Fear, confusion, trepidation … until I opened the door and saw his face.
Seeing the familiar amusement curving his lips into a gorgeous smile, my defenses were instantly stripped away. My fears and my nightmare were suddenly the furthest things from my mind. What is on my mind, however, is kiss—
My thoughts were cut off when he pulled me into his arms, his lips covering mine in a strong, hungry kiss. My stomach grew warm, the butterflies kicking up their frenzy, and my skin feeling as though it was lit on fire.
Wow.
Clearly, a kiss had been the first thing on his mind as well.
“I missed you,” he said as he pulled away from me, his arms still around my waist.
“Hi,” I said, slightly dazed.
“Hi yourself. Ready to go?”
He led me to the car, holding my hand and again opening my door for me. I stopped abruptly when I heard the loud diesel engine coming down the street, accompanied by tire screeching. I looked up, even though deep down I already knew. Toby’s gaze followed mine. Sure enough, the rusted old F-350 came tearing down the street, stopping in my driveway with a spray of grass. Well, partly in my driveway. It was partly in my yard as well.
“Where is that little bitch? It’s time for a lesson in manners.”
Still shirtless, Susan’s boyfriend hopped out of the driver’s side, gripping a Budweiser Tallboy in his hand. Susan was stumbling out of the passenger side of the truck, crying, a look of terror on her face. She still didn’t have on any pants. Neither one of them had bothered to put on shoes.
Toby looked down at me; his brow creased in alarm.
“Meet Jessie’s mom,” I whispered, not taking my eyes off the approaching figures.
Jessie made her way outside and stood next to me, eyes narrowed and defiant, showing only a hint of fear behind them. Toby protectively positioned himself in front of us. My mom and dad were walking out the front door and soon joined us on the lawn.
“Susan, honey, is everything okay?” My mom’s voice: ever calm and collected, even in such moments of stress. Her hands were up in front of her in an almost calming, surrendering stance, as she tried to diffuse the strange situation.
“Oh, don’t you worry about her,” the guy spat as he motioned toward Jessie’s mom. “She’s just fine, ain’t ‘cha, honey?”
“Ye—yes, but … let’s just go, okay?” Her words were slurred, of course, and her large travel cup of who-knows-what sloshed around in her hand.
“Mom, please. Just go. I’m staying here tonight.”
Susan looked at Jessie with pain in her eyes and then looked back at her boyfriend.
“Please, Roy, let’s go home. I’ve got some frozen pizzas—”
“I don’t want no god dammed frozen pizzas. Your girl here needs to know … I don’t take too kindly to people disrespectin’ me. This here’s a lesson only I can teach. She needs to learn respect like you had to, honey.” He licked his lips, reaching for his waist. As I watched him unbuckle his belt, my eyes widened and my heart rate picked up. Oh my god. He’s not actually going to … .
Toby stepped away from us, his shoulders rigid, and his fists clenched tightly.
“Oh, look at this, Susie, a little hero. What’cha gonna do, hero?”
“It’s time for you to go. You don’t want to cause any trouble.” Toby’s body was tense, and his voice was strong with an edge to it I hadn’t heard before. But it was obvious that this guy wasn’t about to back down.
“Oh, don’t I? Don’t I want to cause any trouble?” He exhaled a cloud of cigarette smoke in Toby’s face, and I swear Toby was just seconds away from hitting him. But instead, he just cocked his head and continued standing in that protective stance between us and Susan’s boyfriend.
“It’s time for you to go. I won’t ask again.”
My dad was standing next to Toby now, and I have to admit, he wasn’t nearly as intimidating with his glasses and his hunched over shoulders from so many years in front of a computer. But I was beyond proud of him anyway.
“Well, look at this. You gonna fight me too, old man? I just came for what’s mine.” He looked past my dad and Toby at Jessie standing next to me. “C’mere, you little bitch. Daddy wants to teach you a lesson.”
My dad and Toby were both ready to fly off the handle after Roy’s latest remarks, but somehow, Jessie managed to push past them, venom and rage shooting out of her like sparks.
“You are not my daddy, you disgusting piece of trash.” Jessie’s voice was slow and deliberate, anger emphasizing each syllable, and her pointer finger poking Roy’s chest with each word. Then she pointed her finger in Susan’s direction without taking her eyes off Roy. “She is barely my mother, and you are just some nasty thing she picked up in some nasty bar.”
Her hands clenched into tight fists and dropped to her sides. I watched her take a deep breath, and time slowed to a crawl as I watched what happened next.
“Oh! Get your hands off me—” Jessie’s words were cut off as her mom’s boyfriend reached out and grabbed her arm with one hand, punching her hard across the face with the other.
Everything was a blur after that. My mom and I were down on
the ground, helping Jessie up and trying to get her inside the house. Jessie’s nose was bleeding, and tears poured from her wide eyes. My dad was yelling something to us, but I couldn’t tell what it was over the drunken sobs coming from Susan. Susan, who didn’t rush to her daughter’s side, but instead just stood by the truck, wailing and screaming indecipherably.
As we headed for the door, I looked back in time to see Toby dodge a swing from Susan’s boyfriend, quickly responding with a punch of his own. Clearly having the upper hand, and not at all hindered by alcohol, Toby’s fist connected to its target with a loud crack! Whether Roy was hit hard enough to go flying, or his drunken state made him clumsy, Susan’s boyfriend flew back into the truck and crumpled into a heap on the driveway, unconscious.
My dad grabbed Toby, pulling him back toward the house.
Susan ran to her boyfriend’s side, trying to rouse him from his slumber.
“Roy! Honey, honey! Get up, baby! Oh my God! What is wrong with you people?” Susan shrieked at us. “Look what you’ve done to him!”
As if it was our fault.
As if we were the ones who just showed up on her doorstep looking for trouble.
She was more concerned about the asshole who just hit Jessie than she was about Jessie. I was once again disgusted and amazed by this sorry excuse for a woman. This sorry excuse for a mother.
She doesn’t deserve Jessie.
By Friday afternoon, Jessie’s black eye was on the mend, though no amount of makeup could truly cover up the strange yellow tint of her healing skin. After a long discussion with my parents Sunday night, Jessie had insisted that they not call the police and had convinced my mom and dad that she didn’t want to press charges against her mom’s boyfriend. Reluctantly they agreed, but they went to have a chat with Susan first thing that next morning. Once Susan sobered up, she was distraught over the situation and swore that she would never see that man again. Yeah. I guessed we’d just have to see if her word was as good as her choice in men.
Toby had been out of town since Monday morning, so I could barely get through the afternoon, knowing I would see him again soon. I couldn’t help myself—I kept checking the clock and looking over at the fence between our backyards in anticipation.