I was thinking about Claire getting up and running that bar all by herself. Must be lonely, although it’s weird to think that. She was in a profession where people came in all day and she greeted them with a smile, but what about her?
The phone rang and I took the call. I avoided looking at the clock, conducted what seemed a lot of business and felt I got something accomplished to justify my enormous paycheck. After hanging up, I waited what I thought was several more minutes. Finally, to reward myself, I looked at the clock, expecting it to be well within the lunch hour.
11:42?! Dammit! That was it. I was taking an early lunch! I told my assistant Terry I was taking an early lunch and not to let anyone else know. I slipped down the fire escape stairs, hopped into my Mitata and drove toward the Bad Penny.
As soon as I walked in, I spotted her at the bar cleaning the top and stacking glasses. She looked tired, but still pretty breath taking. I stared at her for a second, then composed myself and sat at the bar.
“Hey Claire,” I greeted.
“Oh, hey,” she smiled. “Sorry I didn’t see you right away. Still a little punchy from last night. Late even for me.”
“Yeah, I hear ya. Shouldn’t party on the weekdays, but sometimes you just gotta,” I joked.
“Did you want something?”
“Hmm? Oh, yeah. Uh, just give whatever--- Soda is fine.”
“Soda gun’s out of commission,” she explained. “I’ll get you a bottle. Mexican Coke okay?”
“Yeah, sure. If you’re gonna have soda, why not have real sugar, I say.”
“Be right back.”
She walked out of the room and I watched her go. The moment she got out of eye sight, I put my head on the bar. What the Hell, Jax? Normally, you would’ve already had sex with a chick like this. My game is so off! What the fuck?
“Who said you could take an early lunch?” said a voice behind me.
I looked up. It was a Brax.
“What the Hell are you doing here?” I whispered. “You’re going to ruin this for me.”
“For you? I’m the one she likes, brother,” claimed Brax. “She’s a woman of distinction and taste.”
Brax sat the bar a little closer to the door. It was a power move, attempting to block me as she came in.
“Are you serious?”
“What?”
“I don’t get you, man. You didn’t even want to come this bar. The bar that she owns, now you won’t leave.”
“You should be working.”
“I have flex time.”
“Well, at least no one else is here to---“
As Brax was about to finish his sentence, Kenner walked through the door all smiles. Then he turned and spotted us. His face dropped.
“What the Hell are you guys doing here?” he demanded.
“You guys are ruining this for me!” I protested. “I saw her first!”
“I got her to dance!” insisted Kenner. “That’s way more intimate than bringing your drunken friends into a bar!”
“We all danced with her!” I snapped.
Finally, Travis walked in while smiling and straightening his tie.
“Oh, dear God,” muttered Brax.
“What the Hell are you guys doing here?” he demanded, as if it was new.
“I don’t believe this,” I muttered.
“Hey, I kissed her first,” said Travis. “She’s totally into me, bro!”
“You guys wouldn’t even be here if it wasn’t for me!” I insisted. “And I saw her first. That’s a clear dibbs. I had dibbs.”
“No one has dibbs,” dismissed Brax. “What is this? The fourth grade? She’s a grown woman, perfectly capable of making up her own mind.”
“Oh, right,” said Kenner sarcastically. “Because you’re already thinking how you’re going to buy her away from the rest of us.”
“I don’t need to buy my women,” insisted Brax. “I just enjoy taking a woman to the South of France on the second date. Sometimes the first.”
“Oh, yeah, that’s not a bribe,” I said in disbelief.
“Well, what about you?” said Brax disdainfully.
“What?”
“Oh, what? Don’t pretend, Jax. You’ve been seducing women with your tired rebel routine our entire lives,” he dismissed. “You’re getting a little long in the teeth for that. Get some new material.”
“Hey, I lost someone very close to me,” insisted Kenner. “I deserve to get Claire. I need to move on.”
“Bro, please,” dismissed Travis. “It’s been three years since Sasha died. And I’m gonna say it.”
“Don’t say it,” warned Kenner.
“You weren’t in love with her, okay? You were talking about breaking up with her,” revealed Travis.
“You swore you would never tell anyone that!” snapped Kenner.
“It’s true, bro. You were just holding on because you had nothing else going on. Now suddenly you want to move on and that’s great, but this chick is all about me,” assured Travis.
“Oh, because you work out obsessively and take steroids!”
“Bro, shut up,” said Travis, looking vulnerable.
“Oh, what? Don’t you want the truth to come out? As long as we’re revealing things!” snapped Kenner.
We fell into arguing and quite frankly, this just made me more determined to win Claire. Finally, she came out of the back with my soda. She stopped in her tracks when she saw the others had joined me.
“Whoa,” she said.
She blushed and let me tell you something, it was one of the most adorable things I’ve ever seen.
“Welcome back, guys,” she smiled. “Good to see you all. What can I get you?”
Chapter 9
Travis
“Oh, uh, yes,” said Brax, trying to figure out the menu. “Just looking for something gluten free…”
“These poseurs don’t normally eat bar food,” I explained to Claire. “You’re not going to find caviar on there, rich boys.”
“Wrong! There’s this Scottish egg. It’s fried. That has to be fish, right?” guessed Kenner.
“I’d like a corned beef and cabbage sandwich,” I ordered.
“How’d you know we even have that?” asked Claire curiously.
“My mom used to work in a place like this,” I explained. “The Irish Pub up on 20th. She was a bartender. Supported me while I was going to school. Had to do my homework in the supply room.”
“I know what that’s like,” said Claire. “I used to do my homework here while my dad worked the tap.”
“I’ll just have a burger and fries,” said Jax. “Does it come with a pickle? I’m in the mood for a pickle.”
“I think we have some pickles, yes,” said Claire writing down the order.
“Caesar Salad with chicken for me,” ordered Kenner.
“The salad’s not very fresh,” warned Claire. “I’d steer clear.”
“Chicken club then,” said Kenner. “Wait, that had lettuce on it. You tell me what’s good.”
“We have the Ploughman’s Sandwich,” she offered. “It comes on hardy Irish brown bread with cheddar and ham.”
“Okay, sure,” agreed Kenner.
I known Kenner for a while and the last thing he’d want is anything too “hardy”. The guy ate like a bird half the time. I think he was just too embarrassed to press her for any more information. If he had to, he’d just abandon the bread.
“I should like to try this bangers and mash and a sparkling water please,” ordered Brax.
“You have no idea what that is, do you?” asked Claire.
“No, not really,” admitted Brax. “But I do love a good surprise.”
“Drinks?”
“Club sodas all around, I think,” I ordered. “Unless you have that sparkling water.”
Claire shook her head that she didn’t. The guys nodded. Well, there was something we could agree on.
“Give me a few minutes,” said Claire. “My cook’s not here yet. If anyone else comes in
, just give a shout, okay?”
Claire walked in the back and as she did, I was taken back to my childhood. My mother worked for this guy named Shamus. Shamus was what I like to call a “nice scumbag”. He was a scumbag. He watered down drinks, scammed customers and once I saw him take a drunk’s wallet. However, he liked me for some reason.
Shamus also liked my mom, in his own scumbaggy way. He would bag her in the supply room before I got out of school. My mother, of course, could see right through him. She didn’t want to, but Shamus made it clear to her it that was part of the job.
“Hey kid,” Shamus said to me one day when I was in sixth grade. “You wanna beer?”
“No,” I declined. “My mother made me promise never to drink here.”
“What?! There’s something wrong with my bar?!” he snapped.
He genuinely scared me that day. I was only 12 and he was a grown man. But like a lot of things Shamus did, he didn’t really mean anything malicious by it. He was just entertaining himself as he always did. Asshole.
“It’s okay, kid,” he laughed. “I was just joshin’ ya. I’m sure your old man did something similar, right?”
“My father left when I was two,” I reminded him.
“I know that sucks, kid. I’m sorry,” he said. “You told me that and I should’ve remembered. Dad’s aren’t so hot, believe me. Mine used to beat the crap out of me. By the time I was your age, I couldn’t wait for him to leave or drop dead.”
“Which did he do?”
“He left,” explained Shamus, taking a sip from his beer. “Then he dropped dead. That’s when I learned, the only people you can rely on in this world is yourself. You read me? Not even me, okay?”
“Way ahead of you there,” I said sullenly.
“It’s true,” he agreed. “I’m not the least bit insulted. You shouldn’t fuckin’ trust a guy like me. If your mother and I weren’t…friends, I wouldn’t hire her. No way.”
“My mom does a lot for me. She’d sacrifice anything,” I said.
“Now see, right there,” Shamus said, pointing with his beer. “You shouldn’t tell a guy like me that. That’s your vulnerability. You never want people to know that. You just stay quiet. You listen to people. People are stupid. They drink too much, they talk to much--- Next thing you know, you know everything about them and you can manipulate them anyway you want.”
“I’m not saying you should, it’s wrong,” insisted Shamus. “I’m saying, that people do that. You need to be aware so you don’t get used. Understand? Jeez, trying to teach you a life lesson.”
“How do I know it’s any good? You just taught it to me.”
“Ya see? You are learning! Trust no one,” he said finishing his beer. “Listen, when your mother gets here, I need you to run an errand for me. You run to the post office and drop off some bills, huh? I’ll give ya a couple of bucks. Maybe go get some ice cream too, okay. Don’t come back right away.”
My mother walked into the bar. We made eye contact. Shamus smiled that predator smile.
“Hey baby, right on time, that’s what I like!” he said handing me a five. “Go on, kid. Beat it.”
“You didn’t give me the bill I had to mail.”
“Oh, right. Ya know, it’s not even ready. Get me some stamps,” he said, putting his arm around my mother. “Again, take your time, all right?”
Mom sacrificed for me so I could have nice things and go to college, but she died before I could pay her back. Sometimes my success seems really hollow in that way. I’ve got all this money now. I could’ve bought the bar and paid some guys to kick the shit out of Shamus. Hell, I would probably just send my mother around the world on my dime. She always wanted to travel.
But all I can do now is buy the most expensive flowers for her grave. I guess that’s something. Sad, but something.
“Yes,” Claire was suddenly saying.
I had tuned out during the flashback. Claire was replying to Kenner, who looked like he just won something.
“Wait-wait-wait!” objected Jax. “I’m taking you out to dinner. That’s the whole reason I came out here! You jumped right into Kenner, you weirdo!”
“Hey, you snooze you lose,” Kenner smiled. “I asked first.”
“I think you all will probably be working late for the next two weeks, so it’s up to me to take Claire out to dinner,” countered Brax. “Check and mate.”
“Hey, bro, that’s not cool. Boss or no, you want to throw down? Cause we can throw down right here and settle things,” I insisted. “If you got a pair.”
“You’re threatening me with violence?” asked Brax, incredulous. “That’s no way to talk to your boss. I should call HR.”
“Yeah, have them check if you still have any balls,” I countered.
Brax stood up on that one. Maybe I would lay him out. Fortunately for him, Claire intervened.
“Okay, okay!” she shouted over the crew. “Obviously, you all want to date me and I feel bad that I flirted with all of you.”
“It’s fine, Claire,” insisted Jax. “Just pick one of us and the rest of these guys will go peacefully.”
“I see what you did there,” said Kenner, making a sour face. “I did asked first.”
“You guys all made fun of me for even suggesting to come here!” insisted Jax. “Brax called the place a dump.”
“I believe my exact words were something like, charming dive,” insisted Brax trying to remember. “It’s not the usual establishment I venture into, but it is charming.”
“Guys…”
“She kissed me,” I reminded everyone. “Claire, I think you have to admit that we shared a moment on the dance floor. That counts for something.”
“Uh, yes, but…”
“We danced!” said Kenner, making his case. “And I did ask you out to dinner first, now I’m not trying to be a spoilsport, but clear these others have ulterior motives.”
“You disrespect us right in front of us?” said Jax a little outraged. “That’s low, bro.”
“Jax, you have a reputation,” reminded Kenner. “Remember that waitress that woke up in your car in the company parking garage.”
“She was asleep, I wanted to let her rest! I was being considerate.”
“Considerate to a call girl,” said Brax out of the side of his mouth.
“Whoa! That’s over the line, brother!” said Jax standing up, angry.
“I withdraw the characterization,” apologized Brax. “I don’t know that for a fact, she may have merely been incredibly loose.”
“Bros, seriously?” I said as the only voice of reason. “This is all bullshit. I’m the alpha male here. I mean, we all know you guys can’t compete in that area.”
“I’ll take off my shirt right now,” threatened Jax, standing up again.
“You wanna pose, bro? I’ll pose!” said Kenner starting to take off his suit jacket.
“Oh, dear Lord,” said Brax shielding his eyes.
“Stop!” announced Claire. “Look, how about you all come to dinner here after work? I still have a bar to run, but we can spend some time together.”
“Who do you like, Claire?” pressed Brax. “You could make all this tension go away, simply by making a choice.”
“Honestly,” she said looking away. “I like you all and so I haven’t really decided, okay? Feeling a bit rushed here, fellas.”
“Don’t rush her!” I scolded Brax. “Claire, these rich guys just want what they want. They don’t have the patience. Not like me.”
“That’s so bad what you just did,” said Kenner, annoyed. “What time would you like us here, Claire?”
“Let’s say seven? Okay? And no one comes early, understand? Last one of your through the door gets a free drink,” I offered.
If she figured that was some kind of incentive for this crowd, she was dead wrong. Still, it was cool. Gave me time to go home and do the total grooming process I like to do for a date. It requires about three hours, but it’s worth it. I look cat
alogue model ready after a primping like that!
We ate lunch in silence. Fortunately, Claire had other customers to attend to. Her cook eventually arrived and she nearly fired her. We all watched as she dressed him down for being so late.
“Jeez,” said Brax. “Glad I’m not him.”
“He’s late, bro,” I said. “Can’t miss the lunch rush. That’s where the money is.”
“Hate to say it, but there’s not much money in this place,” said Brax sadly.
“You’ve only been here twice and you know nothing about running a bar,” I countered.
“True, but I was born with a nose for money,” said Brax looking around. “And trust me, when I say it, it is currently not in this building.”
“Wait until you see this place on Saint Patrick’s Day,” I countered. “That’s where the real money is.”
“Real money?” he questioned.
“Well, in a bar. I’m not comparing her business to ours.”
“Mine.”
“I’m co-owner.”
“I’m boss.”
“Fine, whatever,” I said dropping the subject. “You understand, your rich guy affectation is a hindrance, not a help here.”
“Just because you grew up in the gutter doesn’t make you better at wooing this girl,” insisted Brax. “I’m very relatable for someone in my tax bracket.”
“Yeah,” I scoffed. “If she were part of the Royal Saudi Family maybe.”
“I can blend, sir,” he insisted.
“How’s your bangers and mash?” I kidded.
“How much more of this do you think I have to eat for it to be considered over?” said Brax poking at his dish. “Sausages are not my cup of tea.”
Chapter 10
Kenner
I went into the bathroom. I didn’t really have to go, I just wanted some time to think. This competition for Claire had me conflicted. The guys were my friends and I felt like we were at each other’s throats. I also thought I was going to lose anyway.
How could I compete with Brax? The guy had more money than Donald Trump. I thought he would’ve gotten bored already, but here he is, eating sausage and looking ready to fight Travis. It’s ridiculous. Not to mention the fact that we all work together. How the Hell are we supposed to get anything done like this?
Four Billionaires for St. Patrick's Day Page 4