by Zack Parker
If you live in this world, you have either been exposed to or have been involved in an organized religion. Each with its own set of beliefs and practices. There are things we have all heard of such as fasting, meditation, prayer, chanting, focusing on skill, vows of silence, or confession that all boast the ability to offer a closer relationship with our creator. But even with this knowledge, so many of us never even attempt a new approach to a more spiritually fulfilling life. We don't use these unfamiliar practices because they require us to step out of our spiritual comfort zone. Almost every faith this world has to offer teaches that true faith requires action. So many religious doctrines have been manipulated to teach that this action comes in a more physical manner when the truth, as I see it, is that true spiritual action takes place in the mind. It has to happen here first. It is the stepping out of the comfort zone and into the unknown where we find a deeper understanding of God. This is the realization that leads to actively seeking. Does your spiritual comfort zone have you in a series of never-ending repetition that leaves you with a sense of wanting? Is this sense of wanting your greatest secret? The answers you seek lie just outside of where you currently allow yourself to go spiritually; just outside of your comfort zone. As the Bible states, "Seek, and ye shall find; knock, and it shall be opened unto you." This is how we seek! This is how we knock! By stepping outside of our comfort zones and welcoming the unknown, we allow for spiritual growth.
Change must take place for there to be change! There is no arguing this point. There are two basic types of change. One is good, growth stimulating, progressive change. This type will open your life up to new opportunities and ways of thought that are without limits. The other is sad, limiting, reductive change. This type will swallow you into its belly and hold you there. It will hold you there until that day comes when it's too late, and you can only reflect on a life not LIVED! Step back today and identify your comfort zones. Identify those iron clad excuses. Stop living in a world that gets smaller with age and stop wondering about concepts and places you never investigate or visit. Step out! Discover a reality filled with new experiences, people, and ideas. Make your comfort zone be one that you’re in when you are being the type of person you want to be and living the kind of life that you have always wanted to live.
Chapter 4
Decisions
T here is probably not a more pressing and ever-present matter in our lives than decisions. There is always a decision that must be made. They do not have to be complicated, although they very often are. Decisions are so complex and dynamic. So many variables come into play. Their complexity is found in the variety of individual decisions that must be made, the environment in which the decisions must be made in, and the wide variation of persons making the decisions. There are also the people that will be affected by the decision and the inevitable results that come with any decision. Then there is the uncertainty. Was it the right decision or will it be revealed as the wrong decision? Will people approve of the decision? Do I need help with the decision? Am I over thinking this decision? I regret my decision! I am so happy I made the right decision! Depending on the person and situation, the making of decisions can be one of the most challenging areas we can face as we pass through this life. However, decision making can also be one of the easiest things we do. It’s all a matter of perspective.
One of the main things we should focus on is the actual act of making the decision itself. It requires effort. Two different flaws are usually made here. The first is when we put very little thought into our decisions. We forget about consequence. The unfortunate fact about these types of decisions is that the consequences still exist regardless of whether we consider them or not, and they always find us. The second is inaction. When faced with a situation that requires a decision so many times we choose inaction. We procrastinate through the decision. This procrastination can take the control out of our hands altogether and put the responsibility for the decision, and our fates, in the hands of someone else. If we procrastinate through our work responsibilities, the determination of whether or not we will keep our job will be left up to our superiors. If we go to work and decide to do the bare minimum, then the same is also true. If we choose to slack off on our studies then the decision of if we pass a class or not falls into the hands of the teacher. If we decide to procrastinate about our health, then the decisions on how to keep us alive and healthy is left in the hands of our doctors. The area of health is probably one of the most significant regions of procrastination for most of us. You will read more about this later. If we decide to neglect our spouse or loved ones it may become their decision to no longer associate with us. You must be conscious and decide to do what is best. Decisions, those we make with little thought and those we choose to put off can have profound effects on all areas of our lives and should not be taken lightly.
There must be a clear understanding on this matter. We each hold in our possession the ability to control only one singular thing in this universe, and one thing only. That one thing is how we respond to the circumstances that arise in our lives. While some may put emphasis on the emotional response that we have to our circumstances, it is the decisions we make secondary to the emotional reactions that are so significant. Emotions are so instantaneous! They are so fleeting. They are chemical responses in the brain that happen naturally. Most of the emotions we feel come from our chemical makeup, and the rest are based on our environment and how past experiences have molded us. I am not saying that emotions are unimportant. They are! However, emotions definitely cannot be allowed to have significant power over our decision making. Instead, they should be considered more like advisors who counsel us, but not dictators who control us. If we allow for our emotions to control us, we are giving up significant control every time we are involved in any substantial situation. In any case, what we decide to do next is what truly has transformative effects on our lives.
Individuals that lack a desire for personal development are often led by their emotions. Their emotional and thoughtless decision making will very often leave them managing a very undesirable situation. On the contrary, a person who has experienced or pursued personal betterment and developed a higher degree of self-discipline will more often actively seek the best decision instead of just hoping everything will work out to their advantage. Knowing the significance that our decisions have on our reality can put everything into a new perspective for us. Being conscious and involved in the moment also allows us to look toward our futures and see the accumulative effects that our decisions will inevitably have on our existence. This approach changes everything.
I have found that many people only ponder upon the more substantial decisions. Most of the time, the majority seems to be more concerned with just getting through the day. They are always waiting for the future and expend minimal effort towards making the most of the present. So many potential-filled people float through life satiating their wants with little concern for the needs of their future. Most look forward to the bigger and more substantial decisions and put their mental energy on reserve. This type of mindset is a regrettable mistake that most of us decide to make. The reality is that the small decisions are what sculpt our daily lives, and our daily lives are what accumulate to produce our existence. Although it very often is, this understanding is not something you and I can afford to overlook. We must consciously make daily decisions that we know will benefit our lives in the long run. Trust me; the "long run" will be here before you know it! We must think about our spending, our effect on others, our diet, our attainment of knowledge, our social interactions, our spirituality, and the improvement of all other areas that are influenced by our decision making. Without consideration here we may one day look back with the hindsight of regret.
One of the more significant decisions many of us may make comes when we are buying a home. The importance of making good choices here is obvious. After all, we can be affected by the decisions we make here for 30 years or longer! Buying a home is definit
ely a situation that is worth our consideration. We study, talk to family, hire professionals, and worry to no end! We expend vast amounts of personal effort and financial resources to make sure we are doing the right thing. We do all of this so that in the future, we will be in better shape because of the decisions we made in the past. If we perform our due diligence here, then it usually proves to be an investment that is well worth the effort. What about our daily breakfast? The decision to have a small amount of unhealthy food or extra sugar and creamer in our coffee each day may seem insignificant at first, but these small decisions can combine to create extra pounds of body weight each year. Year after year the combined adverse effects of these seemingly small decisions can become highly destructive to the quality of your life. Much more than a lousy interest rate on your home! How about the small decision to be rude to others instead of kind? These little daily decisions can create friends or enemies of the people you know. Decisions that create enemies can bring about a very lonely and frustrating existence. Once again, the quality of our social interactions and the joy they can bring is much more important than a house! These are but a small fraction of the scenarios that we can encounter in a single day, but I think I am getting the point across. How many times do we choose the easy path? Remember that taking the path of least resistance is what makes rivers crooked. Much like the river, I believe it is the decisions to consistently take the easy path that leads to a much more difficult and unhappy life. Making the small sacrifices and putting effort into our everyday decision making will inevitably take much of the stress off the more substantial decisions that we will encounter as we continue to travel forward into our reality.
The decision you need to decide to make today is one to change. Period. It’s a big one, I know! Decisions like this can only be made secondary to a definite desire for a change. You must want it first! Not just want it though, you must have a sincere need, and this need will be what pushes you to the precipice of a decision. Growth requires change. Believe this simple statement, and your decision will be much easier. But you must understand that a strong desire for change is nothing without a decision to act. You must spend time honestly assessing the areas in your life that require change. Deciding upon what we prefer or do not prefer about our lives is paramount. See clearly into your reality and determine what does and what does not bring joy to your life. See the changes that need to be made and decide upon the proper action that will start to bring about the change you seek. The decision to initiate change is what leads to the beginning of our conscious journey into self-development and personal enlightenment. When you decide that you will no longer be developed by struggle alone, and that beginning today you will use simple decision making to change your existence, then and only then will you realize that you can, as a conscious being, decide to be more of what you wish to be.
Chapter 5
Follow-Through
W hat we have and will continue to discuss throughout this book is how we let life affect us through conscious control of our responses. One of the most important aspects to developing a more fulfilling life is to appreciate and apply follow-through with our decisions. In doing this, we not only decide that change needs to be made, but we actually use the knowledge we have and take action! Follow-through is not a short-term goal; it is a constant state of being. True follow-through is a mental and physical state. Our mental effort is consistently applied, and our physical bodies work toward the attainment of our goals. They do so until its inevitable achievement, or until there is a change in perspective, and a new goal is set. There are those that call this “The law of attraction.” However, for the most part, if you remove the mysticism, it is follow-through.
I’m sure that by this point in your life you have probably realized, or you are at least starting to understand, that life is constant, and it will continue despite your personal situation or emotional state. It will continue! Life will outrun this day and help you forget your problems. It will help to heal all of your wounds and eventually allow the pains that come with unfortunate circumstances to slowly fade into your distant memory. However, life’s frantic pace can also cause us to forget our current blessings. Sometimes, when we are just trying to keep up, it is hard to make ourselves stop and look around at all the wonder that surrounds us. This can put us into a consistent state of frustration and make it very difficult for us to harbor the proper motivations. What you must learn to do is stop for a moment, on occasion, and think. This time should be used to harvest and use past and present frustrations as a motivating force. These frustrations should make it clear what you do and do not want in your life. Once this force is harnessed, you use it to help direct future actions so they can help you to avoid repetition into failure and frustration. If you resist development and continue to repeat the same type of cycles in your life, then you will continually have more of the same problems. Life will become an endless experience of disappointment, fear, and frustration. But there is another choice. You can choose to develop and change based on what you have learned from your experience. This knowledge can be of immeasurable value when it is applied, but it is only knowledge. Without follow-through, it might as well be dust in the wind. You must use the knowledge and follow through. As you decide what you want and what will be required of you to change your life, you must practice follow-through. You must apply consistent effort towards the achievement of your desired goals if you are ever to attain the desires of your heart.
Let’s imagine that there are two gardeners. One we will call William, and the other will be Butch. Both gardeners desire a beautiful garden and a bountiful harvest. They both know what must be done to achieve their goal. However, in this scenario, they are going to take two very different approaches. William knows the season is upon him, so he begins to gather his seeds and till the earth. Butch puts these tasks on his to-do list and makes a firm mental commitment to do it within the week. William fertilizes the soil and plants the seed. Butch runs a little behind and puts his garden off for one more week until he has a little more free time. Two weeks later Butch manages to round up his seeds. One week later he tills his soil, but he waits to plant. It rains and destroys his rows so he will have to work the dirt once again before he can plant. Meanwhile, the rain was an answered prayer for William. The fresh rainwater germinates his seeds and brings them to life. Butch eventually gets his seeds planted, but he is now a month into the planting season and still no growth. William is beginning to train his vines, and he keeps an eye on the undergrowth daily to make sure all his hard work is not undone. This overgrowth takes less time than most imagine. (It’s much easier to stay in a race than it is to catch up!) Butch’s garden has grown up with weeds since he initially tilled the dirt and it is now hard to tell the difference between where his plants end and the weeds begin. He makes a halfhearted attempt to rectify his situation but fixing the problem is a lot of work, and other matters seem more easily achievable so he decides he will work on it later. At the peak of the growing season, William is now harvesting from a beautiful, well kept, productive garden. The fruit of his follow-through could not be more bountiful. He is pleased, and each trip to his garden is now an enriching experience that brings joy to his days. Butch on the other hand only managed to reap a minimal harvest. Most of which spoiled in the garden. What he did collect was rarely consumed because he very often took the easy route and ate out instead of cooking. Every time Butch looks at his garden he feels shame. He knows exactly why he failed. The seed he purchased and the work he put into his garden was all for nothing because of his lack of follow-through. Who do you think will be optimistic the next time garden season comes around? Who do you think will probably fail to even set the goal next time because of a history of failure? It is clear here that wanting a garden and knowing what needs to be done is just not enough. There must be prompt follow through with decisive action if we are to achieve our goals.
I know that immediate action is not always possible. What if these two individuals
had planted their gardens in the dead of winter? No, the garden has to be planted in the proper season. Sometimes, follow-through is applied through the creation of a plan. The old saying “Failure to plan is a plan for failure” is a profound truth and should never be forgotten. A key lesson here is that keeping your goals in mind is always a good thing and it will often lead to a solid plan for obtaining them. We cannot always act immediately in the physical world to achieve our goals. Sometimes it takes consistent follow through with mental planning to allow us to then follow through in the physical world. However, do not forget that thought alone will never bring to you that which you desire in the physical world. Eventually, action is justified and required.
The principal of follow-through is equally as important when we begin to ponder our spiritual yearnings. Practicing follow-through in our spiritual endeavors is perhaps more important than any other area. If you doubt this then just read any religious text. Despite which one you may pick, you will find stories that tell of saints and leaders that practiced non-relenting and rigorous religious follow-through. These key figures knew that nothing mattered more than the attainment of enlightenment and a closer relationship with God. It did not matter what level of sacrifice had to be made. They did what was required. Today many have the desire, but they do not share these deep and unwavering levels of commitment. Many people believe or have heard that practices such as chanting, meditation, or fasting will bring them a deeper spiritual connection but lack the commitment to follow through. Having faith in these practices is great, but the simple belief that these acts can provide spiritual fulfillment will bring you nothing but wanting. You must follow through. You must turn your spiritual inspiration into mental and physical motivation and then take that motivation and follow through. If it is a connection with nature you seek, you must find time to spend in a more natural setting. If you wish to achieve more comfort in a meditative state, then you must practice meditation. Want is nothing but the seed of frustration if we do not practice follow-through.