This line of thinking was new to her.
She was always confident that the Lord would see her down any path, through any obstacles. Why was it so hard for her to trust His plan now when she needed the strength of her faith to see her through this painful time? Waves of self-pity washed over her, and she gave in to the pain, the hurt.
It felt like she cried for hours, or perhaps time stood still and the earth stopped turning altogether. Her future with Jacob meant the world to her. She hadn’t realized how desperately she wanted that future until it was being taken away from her.
It wasn’t fair.
She sat up and looked around the room. Her furniture, her decorations, they seemed to belong to someone else.
She felt like a trapped animal—a stranger in her home.
She stumbled out the front door and sank to her knees on the porch, taking giant gulps of fresh air.
The stillness and vastness of the night soothed her. She held herself, shivering from cold and exhaustion. Out in the open she felt small, but she didn’t feel trapped anymore.
She took a few deep, shaky breaths and saw something glinting out of the corner of her eye.
She turned her head to look.
It was the light of the moon reflecting off the eyes of a panther, not twenty feet from where she crouched on the porch. She was sure it was the one she and Saunders had seen the night before.
The animal sat, motionless as a statue, returning her gaze. It blinked once, then turned around and strode into the darkness.
Somehow the panther acknowledging her existence made her feel real again.
As she gazed up at the stars, she felt God’s love all around her, in everything. Surely His plan would become evident to her when the time was right.
If she could only hold things together until then.
PART FOUR
CHAPTER 67
At six o’clock Saturday morning, Penelope awoke on her sofa to the screeching of her cell phone’s alarm clock app. She rubbed her hand across her face and through her hair. As she stretched, the events of the previous day came flooding back. A knot twisted in her stomach because Jacob’s love was no longer certain, and he was the prime suspect in Donny’s case.
For the next hour and a half, she went on autopilot, showering and getting dressed without paying attention to her actions. She made herself a cup of coffee, checked her cell phone, and saw that she had ten voice mails. Eight of them were from Jacob, one was from Doug last night, and one, from a number she didn’t recognize, was left a few minutes ago. She listened to that one first.
“Hi Penelope, this is Tina. I’m so sorry about how things went yesterday and I want to meet with you. I have to tell you something important. I don’t want there to be any more misunderstandings. Meet me at Spanky’s today at twelve thirty? Please!”
Tina? How did Tina get her number? What did she want? Was she going to confess to her?
Penelope tried calling back, but the call went straight to voice mail. Looks like she’d have to wait until noon to find out. She hung up and sent Tina a text message. Tina, it’s Penelope. Got your message. See you at 12:30 at Spanky’s.
Now what was she going to do with herself in the meantime? She dialed Doug’s number.
“Hello?” Doug sounded groggy.
“It’s me. Why aren’t you awake yet? You’ll make Trevor late for school.”
“Penny? Huh? It’s Saturday. No school, no work. Sleeping.”
“I’m coming over.”
“Huh? Is everything alright?”
“Yes, I’ll fill you in when I get there. I’ll make pancakes.”
“I’ll eat them,” he said and hung up to catch a few more precious moments of sleep.
Penelope gathered some things from her kitchen and put them into a tote bag. Doug had been a bachelor for a while now, and he had the pantry to prove it.
She pulled her hair into a quick ponytail, grabbed her keys, and headed out the door. Once she was on the porch, she froze. Her eyes drifted over to where she had seen the panther.
Had it been real or a dream? Was it a sign? And if so, of what?
CHAPTER 68
The drive to Doug’s house was quiet and peaceful. She left the radio off and thought of the panther’s eyes, shining in the moonlight. The last time she had seen the endangered cat, Saunders had shot at it, and yet it returned to her front yard. It wasn’t scared of her. For some reason the thought comforted her—the panther belonged there as much as she did.
As she pulled up Doug’s driveway at nine o’clock, Penelope saw two little forms jumping up and down on the porch—Trevor and another boy that looked to be about the same age. As soon as she had parked, Trevor ran down the porch steps, and the other boy followed.
She opened her car door and was the recipient of a hug that was more like a tackle. “Ooof,” she gasped as the air left her lungs.
“Trevor!” Doug yelled from the front door. “Don’t tackle your Aunt Penny.”
Penelope picked up Trevor and kissed his chubby cheeks until the boy squirmed out of her arms. The other boy stood a safe distance and gave her a quizzical look. “Who’s your friend, Trevor?” Penelope asked.
The blond haired boy took a cautious step closer and stuck out his hand. “I’m Hadley Jackson Rye, ma’am.”
Penelope smiled and bent down to shake the young gentleman’s hand. “Pleased to meet you, Hadley. I’m Penelope, but you can call me Penny if you like.”
“Hadley is my friend,” Trevor said. “We had a sleepover. What’s in the bag, Aunty Penny?”
“I brought coffee for me and your dad,” she told him, feigning ignorance.
“Is that all?”
“No, I brought some canned spinach as well.” Her mind scrambled to think of other unappetizing things. “And olives. The kind with the red things in the middle.”
“Oh,” Trevor said, uncertain now.
“And pancakes.”
“Yay! You were right, Dad!”
Penelope handed Trevor the canvas bag and followed him to the house. Doug stepped off the porch and greeted her with a warm hug.
“A sleepover, huh?” she asked, giving her brother a squeeze before releasing the embrace. “Sounds like you had your hands full last night.”
“They weren’t so bad,” Doug said with a strained smile.
Penelope watched as the boys rummaged through the bag of groceries. “I thought I knew all of Trevor’s friends.”
“Yeah, me too. Tracie, Hadley’s mom, lived in the same apartment complex as Camille. She used to babysit Trevor.”
“Hey! I’m not a baby,” Trevor protested.
Doug smiled and ruffled his son’s hair. “I know you’re not, Trev.” He turned back to Penelope and continued, “Anyway, Tracie reached out to me a couple of months back, asking if I needed help and if the boys could have a play day. I think it’s been good for Trevor, having someone to play with.”
“He sure looks happy,” Penelope said.
“Where are the pancakes, Aunty Penny?” Trevor asked.
“We have to make them. Would you and Hadley like to help me?”
“Yes,” the boys shouted in unison.
“Okay. Take the bag inside and meet me in the kitchen. I want to talk to your dad for a second.”
Trevor and Hadley each grabbed a handle and carried the bag into the house.
When the boys were out of sight, Penelope filled Doug in on the events of the past couple days—about following Jacob and what she saw yesterday.
He was shocked.
“There is no way that Jacob is cheating on you,” he said. “There has to be an explanation. He called me twice yesterday looking for you. Said you were supposed to meet for dinner.”
“He’s called me a few times, too. I let them all go to voice mail.”
“Didn’t you listen to them?”
Penelope looked away. “I couldn’t.”
“He’s worried, Pen.”
“I’m sure he i
s. Worried about what I’ve found out.”
“You don’t know for sure what he’s done. You believed in me last year. Can’t you do the same for him? At least listen to his messages.”
Anger, suspicion, love, and guilt rushed through her. “You’re right,” she said. “I’ll do it now. See you in the kitchen in a few minutes?”
“I’ll get the mixer out.”
Doug’s mixer was an ancient artifact. It had belonged to his grandmother, and the cord was so frayed, Penelope didn’t dare plug it in. “Be careful,” she warned him.
As soon as he was gone, she listened to Jacob’s messages from the night before.
“Hey, Officer Beautiful! When you get a break from fighting crime, give me a call. Are we still on for dinner tonight? Love you.”
At the sound of his voice, tears stung her eyes. There couldn’t possibly be any tears left to cry, but her body proved that her supply was unlimited. She played the rest of the messages, and Jacob sounded more and more worried as the day wore on.
The last one nearly broke her heart. “Penny, I’m worried. This isn’t like you. Please call me.” There was a pause, then a heavy sigh before the call disconnected.
The urge to cry hit her hard and fast. She sat on the front step, and after a few shaky breaths, she tapped Jacob’s number into her phone. He was probably at work, and it was always busy, so there was a chance he wouldn’t answer. Sure enough, she got his voice mail.
“Hello, you’ve reached Dr. Jacob Gordon. Please leave a message.” It was a recording she had heard a million times, but this time, it stole her breath. The thought of never hearing his voice again was something she hadn’t considered, until now.
She fought to bury the swell of emotion and said, “Hey, Jacob. It’s me. I got wrapped up with some interviews last night and turned my phone off.” How much should she say in a voice mail? It didn’t seem like a proper way to have a discussion that could lead to a breakup. “We have to talk. I’ll try to be available today. I have a lunch meeting, but I’ll try to answer if you call.” She didn’t know how to end the message. It was something that seemed so natural before all of these doubts had crept into her mind. Now it was intimidating. “Bye,” she said and disconnected.
Jacob would know that something was off with that message. He already knew that she was avoiding him for some reason, although he didn’t seem to know what that reason was. Or he was at least doing a great job of pretending not to know. She allowed herself to feel a tiny flutter of hope that this was all a misunderstanding and that things would go back to the way they were before. She tried to quiet the dissenting voice inside her that said things would never be the same.
“Right. Pancakes,” she said aloud and joined Doug, Trevor, and Hadley in the kitchen. She didn’t turn her phone off, but kept it on silent and put it in her purse. She needed to do something normal with her family to make her feel like herself again.
The scene that greeted her in the kitchen shouldn’t have been a shock, but to see Trevor, Hadley, and Doug, and the table, and the floor covered in flour genuinely surprised her.
“You couldn’t wait for me?” she asked, holding in her laughter.
Trevor’s bottom lip trembled. “We were going to surprise you and make you pancakes, Aunty Penny.”
“I tried to help them,” Doug added, “but I think we’re doing something wrong.”
“I’ll say!” Penelope laughed so hard she could barely stand. She staggered to the kitchen table and fell into a flour-dusted chair.
Trevor saw that she was laughing and decided not to cry. Everyone joined Penelope, and they all laughed until they couldn’t speak.
When the giggles died down, Trevor piped up. “You’ll still make us pancakes, Aunty Penny?” The concern in Trevor’s voice led Doug and Penelope to further peals of laughter.
“Yes, Trevor, I’m still making you pancakes. But you and Hadley are going to be in charge of cleanup.”
CHAPTER 69
By the time they had finished breakfast and cleaned up the kitchen, it was a little before noon. Penelope had made Mickey Mouse pancakes and had even convinced Trevor to eat some apple slices.
This was the type of family life that she longed for, and she was relieved to know that even if her relationship with Jacob didn’t work out, she could still call Doug and Trevor family. She could take care of them, and they would take care of her.
Even if she never married and had kids of her own, she had these two silly guys to give her life meaning. That would be enough for her.
“You want to go to the park, Aunty Penny?”
“Aw, I’m sorry, buddy. I can’t today. I have to leave soon.”
“But I want you to stay!” There was a hint of a whine in his voice.
“I’ll take you and Hadley,” Doug offered.
“It’s not the same.”
Penelope picked up Trevor and gave him a hug. “Maybe next time,” she said. The fondness and love for his childish view of things warmed her heart. She handed Trevor off to Doug and gathered her purse and keys. “I’m meeting Tina Shifflett for lunch.”
“Tina?” he asked.
“The woman I told you about earlier.” She lowered her voice and added, “The woman I saw with Jacob. She works over at Grace Memorial, but she wanted to meet with me at Spanky’s.”
“So, it’s about the case or something else?”
“I don’t know. Donny and I interviewed her yesterday. She left me a message early this morning. Said she needs to talk.”
“Do you want me to go with you?”
“No. I think it’d be better if I go alone. But, thank you.”
“Let me know what happens.”
“I will.” Penelope smiled and gave Trevor a kiss good-bye. “Let your dad take you to the park. Maybe you guys will see an alligator. You should bring the binoculars that I got you for your birthday so you can report back to me on what animals you see.”
“Can we go to the alligator park, Dad?”
“Sure, bud. You and Hadley go get ready.” Trevor and his friend left the room at lightning speed, and Doug’s expression became serious. “Call or text if you need anything, Pen. I mean it. You don’t get to be there for me and not let me be there for you.”
“I know.” It wasn’t always easy for him to say what he meant, but she knew what he was saying. “You have no idea how much better I feel after spending time with you and Trevor. You’re the only family I’ve got, and I’m so grateful for it.”
Hadley ran back into the kitchen and gave Penelope a hug. “Thank you for pancakes.”
“You’re welcome, Hadley. It was very nice meeting you.”
Doug’s eyes looked a little misty and Penelope didn’t trust herself to say anything else without getting emotional.
She waved good-bye and left.
CHAPTER 70
All of Penelope’s bravery and newly restored courage failed her when she arrived at Spanky’s Grill. She was a few minutes early and couldn’t decide which was worse—awkwardly meeting her fiancé’s possible mistress in the parking lot, or awkwardly waiting for her at a table by herself.
She looked in the rearview mirror and sighed. She looked tired. She ran her hands over her hair and put on some lip balm.
You can do this, Penny.
She walked into the restaurant trying to look as nonchalant as possible. Christene Gamble, the only waitress on duty, greeted her.
“Hey, Officer Penelope. You meeting your honey for lunch?”
“No, not today, Christene.” Penelope hoped the stabbing pain she felt in her heart wasn’t showing on her face. She mustered a smile and found an empty booth. Being the first to arrive gave her a slight position of power. Tina was coming to her, not the other way around.
“Anything to drink?”
“Iced tea, please.”
Penelope pulled out her cell phone and noticed a new voice mail from Jacob. She pressed play. “Penny, Gainesville Police Department just called and they want
me to come into the station for some follow-up questioning. Do you know anything about this? What’s going on? I spoke to Doug yesterday and he said you were keeping him in the loop. You think you could pay me the same courtesy?”
Christene set her iced tea on the table, and Penelope jumped.
“You alright, dear?”
Penelope placed her phone face down on the table. “Yeah, I’m fine.” It was the truth. She didn’t need to tell everyone the details of her life.
“You want to order something, hun?”
“Maybe in a minute, I’m meeting someone.”
“Alright, then.” Christene buzzed over to the counter to grab a pitcher of iced tea, and then she walked around the restaurant topping off people’s drinks.
Penelope stared out the window and watched a hummingbird perched on the stem of a Mamou plant. Had she ever seen a hummingbird land before? She must have, maybe not so close. To see the ruby-throated bird so motionless went against all of her notions about hummingbirds. They were both out of their element.
She picked up her phone and dialed Jacob’s number.
“Penelope?” A voice called, startling her again.
She hung up and jerked toward someone calling her name.
Tina Shifflett tentatively moved toward the booth and sat down. She looked distraught, and Penelope’s stomach churned as she prepared for the worst.
Christene arrived at this awkward moment to take Tina’s drink order. As soon as she walked away, they both started talking at the same time.
“Look, Tina—”
“I’m sorry, Pen—”
Penelope waved her hand benevolently to let Tina know she could go first.
“I’m so sorry, Penelope. I didn’t tell the whole truth yesterday.”
Penelope took a sip of her iced tea and tried not to choke on it. This didn’t sound good at all.
Another Chance (A Penelope Chance Mystery Book 2) Page 19